Modern social etiquette and eloquence

Chapter 16 Business Etiquette and Eloquence (1)
Customers are God, etiquette is the best business card.

In business activities, both sides of the communication have interest needs, rather than unilateral interest needs.Therefore, in business activities, honesty and trustworthiness are very important, which is also required by the connotation of business etiquette.

Business activities are highly timed.Sometimes, in business activities, if the words and actions are just right, the problem will be solved, which is also the behavioral requirement of business etiquette.

At the same time, although business activities are economic activities, they have a high cultural content, which is determined by the nature of business etiquette.

[-]. Business reception etiquette

With the development of the market economy, the official business exchanges between various units and enterprises are getting closer, and the official business activities are becoming more and more frequent.The reception work is the initial contact between the two parties. Whether the etiquette is thoughtful or not is directly related to the other party's first impression of the unit, so it should be paid attention to.

1. Reception Specifications
Reception etiquette has a very important relationship with the status of guests.According to the status of the guests, the reception specifications can be divided into three types: high-level reception, low-level reception, and peer-to-peer reception.

(1) High-quality reception, that is, the reception with a higher duty to accompany guests than to visitors.Generally, there are several situations: the superior leader sends general staff to dictate opinions to the subordinate leader;All these require the leadership of the unit to accompany them.

(2) Low-level reception, that is, reception with a lower position to accompany guests than visitors.This is more common in establishments.Leaders of higher-level leading departments or competent departments come to the local area for inspection; veteran cadres revisit their hometowns;In these cases, the reception does not need to mobilize a large number of teachers, the leaders of the unit can come forward to visit.

(3) Peer-to-peer reception, that is, to accompany the reception with the same position and level as the guest.No matter what level the visitor is, you can accompany the guest at whatever level, or by appointment, the leaders of the specific handling department will receive them on a peer-to-peer basis. The higher-level leaders of the unit only need to visit in advance.

2. Reception requirements
(1) meet and see

Welcoming and sending off is a common social activity. Important guests or first-time visitors must be greeted and sent off; ordinary guests or guests who have visited many times sometimes do not need to arrange to be greeted and sent off.

When picking up and sending off visitors, it is necessary to accurately grasp the arrival and departure time of the means of transportation used by the visitors, inform the pick-up staff and relevant units in advance, and try to ensure that the guests are picked up and sent off smoothly without delaying the time of the pick-up staff.

When welcoming guests, they should arrive at the meeting place before the arrival of the means of transportation that the guests take, and greet the guests in time when they get off the plane (get off the car) to express their welcome.

When sending off, it should also arrive at the send-off location before the guest boards the plane (vehicle and ship).When saying goodbye, wait for the vehicle and boat to start before leaving.

(2) Accompanying the car, escorting

Accompanying the car, the guest should be asked to sit on the right side of the owner.The seating position of the car is also particular: when there is a driver, the rear row is the upper right, the second is the left, the third is the middle, and the fourth is next to the driver.If there are two guests, sit next to the driver with the passenger; when the owner is the driver, the driver is next to the driver, and the order in the back row is as above; when the owner is the driver and there is a wife sitting together, the wife should sit next to the owner and the driver, and the order in the back row is as above.

There is also an order when walking with guests. Generally, the front right is the top, and guests should be allowed to walk on their right to show respect.If there are three people, the middle is the top. If you are the host, you should walk side by side on the left side of the guests, not behind. If you are the accompanying person, you should walk behind the guests and the host, and you cannot walk side by side or in front. .When going out with the leader, you should generally walk a little behind or behind the leader.

If the walking distance is long, help the guest to carry the bag or other things with the guest's permission.When changing the direction of travel, you should point out with your hands while explaining.

When taking a manned elevator, the passengers should be first in and out first; in an unmanned elevator, you should be in first and the guests out first.

When you arrive at the meeting room, you should tell the guests and say "come in".When opening the door for guests, if the door opens outward, you should stand outside and let the guests go in; if the door opens inward, you should go in first and stand inside.

3. General visitor reception
In daily official activities, visitors are often encountered, and many of them are not by appointment.Although the specifications and procedures for receiving general visitors do not need to be so complicated and strict, they should also be warm, thoughtful and polite.

When the guests come, they should stand up from their seats, greet them actively, shake hands and say hello, invite the guests to enter the room and sit down, pour tea for them, hand them over with both hands, and say "tea please".

For guests who are coming for the first time or who have not made an appointment, they can politely ask about their identity and purpose.If the other party is looking for you to do something, you should provide help as much as possible. If you can't do it, explain the situation to the visitor patiently. Don't say "no" bluntly, embarrassing the customer; Reports and introductions can be handled by yourself if they are within the scope of your own authority; if the person the other party is looking for is not available, you should also politely explain the situation, and you can take the initiative to ask the guest to leave their name, phone number or address and what matters, and pass it on your behalf. make contact.

When the guest meets the leader, unless the two parties are very familiar, an introduction is generally required.The principle of introduction is to introduce the younger or lower-status party to the older or high-status party first, and introduce the men to the lady first.When introducing, it is necessary to state clearly the name, affiliation and position of the party being introduced.

If the other party handed over the business card, you have to stand up and take it with both hands, and read it carefully before putting it away. It is disrespectful to the guest and easily arouses the other party's resentment.In general, if you want to give a business card back, you also lean forward and hand it with both hands.If you happen to have no business card, explain to the other party and apologize.

When receiving guests, do not tidy up documents and other items on the table in a hurry, but close or cover them naturally after giving up your seat.When talking with guests, you should be attentive and enthusiastic, keep your eyes on each other, and don't listen to the guests while you are still doing work.

When the guest leaves, he should get up and send the guest to the door, saying politely: "Thank you for coming." "Welcome to come again." and so on.

[-]. Etiquette norms in business negotiations

In official activities, in order to reach an agreement and meet the requirements of all parties, relevant parties often have to conduct business negotiations.In business negotiations, an agreement must be reached on the basis of equality, friendship, and mutual benefit, so special attention should be paid to etiquette in negotiations.

1. Negotiation preparation
Before business negotiations, the negotiators must first be determined, and the negotiators on one's own side must be equivalent to the identity and position of the other party's negotiators.

Negotiators must have good overall quality, organize their appearance, and dress neatly, formally and solemnly.Gentlemen should be clean-shaven and must wear a tie in a suit.Ladies should not wear too sexy clothes, stiletto heels are not suitable, and light makeup should be worn.

Before the negotiation, it is necessary to fully prepare for the negotiation theme, content and agenda, and formulate plans, goals and negotiation strategies.

2. The beginning of the negotiation
At the beginning of the negotiation, it is necessary to create a friendly and relaxed negotiation atmosphere as far as possible in speech and demeanor.

When introducing yourself, be natural and generous, without arrogance.The person being introduced should stand up and smile, and politely say: "It's a pleasure to meet you", "Please take care of me" and so on.Ask the other party to be polite, such as "ask your surname and name" and so on.If you have a business card, you should accept it with both hands.After the introduction, you can choose a topic of common interest to have a conversation in order to communicate feelings and create a gentle atmosphere.

The posture and actions at the beginning of the negotiation also play an important role in grasping the atmosphere of the negotiation. You should look into the eyes of the other party to make the other party feel that you are being followed and that you are sincere and serious.Gestures are natural, and it is not advisable to gesticulate indiscriminately, so as not to cause a sense of frivolity.Don't cross your arms over your chest, it looks very arrogant and rude.

The important task at the beginning of the negotiation is to find out the details of the other party, so you should listen carefully to the other party's conversation, carefully observe the other party's behavior and expression, and respond appropriately, so that you can not only understand the other party's intentions, but also show respect and politeness.

3. Negotiating
This is the substantive stage of the negotiation, mainly including quotation, inquiry, negotiation, resolution of conflicts, and cold silence.

(1) Quotations must follow the principles of being clear and trustworthy.For the convenience of the other party, the quotation should be made first, but the quotation should not change during the negotiation.Once the other party accepts the quoted price, it cannot be changed, and the quotation cannot be regarded as a trifling matter. "Lion's big mouth" is to put pressure on the other party, which is very impolite.

(2) Inquiry is to question and inquire about the large deviations in the cooperation between the two parties or the mistakes of the other party, and then the other party will explain and explain.Prepare relevant questions in advance, choose to ask them when the atmosphere is harmonious, and be open and honest.Don't speak too aggressively or ask questions endlessly, so as not to arouse the other party's resentment or even anger.But we should strive not to compromise on issues of principle.

(3) The negotiation is actually a head-to-head confrontation after understanding the situation and quotations of both parties, that is, "bargaining".Since this is related to the interests of both parties, it is easy to be impolite due to urgency, so special attention should be paid to maintaining demeanor.

(4) Conflicts and stalemates often occur during negotiations, and you should remain patient and calm.You must discuss the matter as it stands, and you must not get angry or even attack or insult the other party because of a conflict.This can lead to a total failure of negotiations.

(5) During the negotiation, due to some reasons, neither party will speak first.At this time, the main party should handle it flexibly, and can temporarily change the topic and relax a little.If you really have nothing to say, you should make a decisive decision, temporarily suspend the negotiation, and resume it after a short break.The main party should take the initiative to raise topics, summarize the speeches in the previous stage or ask new questions, and the cold room should not last too long.

4. Signing ceremony
After a series of consultations, when the two parties reach an agreement, they have to go through a signing ceremony to make it written and become a legally effective document.

After the contract or treaty negotiated by both parties is finalized, it must be in duplicate.

The signing ceremony is usually held in a spacious conference room, with a long table covered with a dark tablecloth, and two chairs placed side by side behind the table, facing the door.The host is on the left and the guest is on the right.Put the pre-printed text on the table, place the signing utensils separately, and put a bouquet of flowers in the middle.A monogram can be pasted on the wall behind the signing table, stating titles such as "XX Contract Signing Ceremony, × Year × Month × Day".

When signing a contract, all the personnel participating in the negotiation of both parties must attend, enter the venue together, greet each other, shake hands, and sit together.Both parties should have signing assistants, who stand on the outside of their respective representative signatories, and the rest stand behind their respective representatives.

The signing assistant shall assist the signer to open the text and indicate the position of the signature with his fingers.The representatives of both parties sign the text prepared for themselves, and then the signing assistants exchange with each other, and then the representatives sign the other party's text.

After signing, the text will come into effect. Both parties should stand up at the same time, exchange texts, and shake hands with each other to congratulate the successful cooperation.The rest of the entourage should congratulate with warm applause.

[-]. Manipulating negotiations with the tongue
Successful negotiation is the result of the use of eloquence by both parties. Whoever masters the skill of eloquence will be in a favorable position in the negotiation.If you want to effectively communicate your goals, requirements, concepts, and ideas to the other party during the negotiation process, you need good negotiating eloquence to achieve the purpose of communication.

The following are the training skills of listening, asking, answering, narrating and persuading in negotiation.

1. Listening skills

Listening does not refer to listening with the auditory organs of the ear, but to use one's own eyes to observe the opponent's movements and expressions, use one's heart to make empathy for the other's words, and use one's own mind to judge the opponent's attitude. The motivation behind the words.

(1) Listen critically
Listening critically must be based on attentive listening, because if you don't listen attentively, you will not be able to identify the other party's information, which ones are true, which ones are false, and which ones are useless.

(2) Listen without prejudice
If you have a prejudice against the person speaking to the other party, you will often be prejudiced when listening to his speech. Therefore, you cannot listen to his speech objectively.Even if the other person's words are important to you, you will not get beneficial information from the other person's words.

(3) Don't rush to talk while listening

Rushing to talk will disrupt the other party's thinking and delay your own listening.Chatting is different from questioning. Questioning is an explanation or repetition that is required from the other party because a certain information or meaning cannot be remembered or understood. Therefore, questioning is necessary.Chatting is eager to correct the mistakes of others, or replace others' views with your own. It is a disrespectful behavior that often blocks the other party's thinking and is not conducive to creating a good negotiation atmosphere.

(4) Take the initiative to give feedback

To get good results from your own listening, you must not only listen attentively, but also give feedback, such as expressing to the other party how much you understand what he said through spoken language, facial expressions or actions, or asking the other party to explain or elaborate What he said, so that the other party will be willing to express his point of view more, wider and deeper because of your attitude.

Whenever possible, try to create an environment conducive to listening to yourself and the other party, so that you can not only discover the truth, but also explore the opponent's motivation and thinking.

2. Ask questions

Asking questions is the most effective way to "listen more and talk less". Asking questions in negotiations mainly has the following functions.

(1) Collect information.

(2) Perspective of the other party's motives and intentions.

(3) Encourage the other party to participate in opinions.

(4) Determine whether the opinions tend to be consistent.

In order to make questioning play its unique function in negotiation, we should pay attention to the application of eloquence skills in questioning.

(1) Closed questions
This is a question that gets a specific answer in a specific domain.For example: "Do you think there is no possibility of improving after-sales service?" (The answer should be "yes" or "no") Closed questions allow the questioner to obtain specific information, and the person who answers this kind of question does not need much The answer can be given within a few minutes of thinking.

(2) Open-ended questions
This is a question that can get a wide range of answers in a wide range of fields.Simple "yes" or "no" responses, such as: "How do you feel about your current job performance?"Since open-ended questions do not limit the scope of the answer, the respondent can speak freely, and the questioner can also learn the interlocutor's position and feelings from it.

(3) Clarifying questions
This is a kind of question sentence aimed at the other party's answer, re-asking the question to make the other party confirm, or supplementing the original answer.For example: "You just said that you can make trade-offs for the current sale. Does that mean that you have full authority to negotiate with us?" Communicate, and it is a way of understanding and giving back to the other party's words.

(4) Exploratory questioning
This is a question that asks for an extension or an example for the other party's answer.For example: "You said that you give all underwriters a 30% discount on the price without discrimination. Please explain why you don't give greater discounts to underwriters with larger sales volume as an incentive?" More sufficient information can also be used to show that the questioner attaches importance to the other party's answer.

(5) Questions containing third-party opinions
This is a question that uses the opinions of a third party to influence the opinions of the other party, for example: "The experts in the engineering department quite support the requirements of the user department to update equipment. I wonder what your purchasing department thinks about the requirements for updating equipment?" If the third person in the question of the three opinions is familiar to the other party and also someone he respects, the question will have a great influence on the other party, otherwise, it will be counterproductive.

(6) Introductory questions

This is a question that suggests an answer.For example: "You breached the contract, should you bear the responsibility?" This kind of question almost makes the other party have no choice but to answer according to the answer designed by the questioner.

3. Response skills

All questions must be answered. "Ask" has the art of asking, and "answer" also has the skill of answering.

(1) Give yourself enough time to think.

How well you answer questions during negotiations does not depend on your speed of answering, especially when facing some questions involving important vested interests, you must carefully consider before answering.

(2) It is necessary to understand the purpose and motivation of the other party's question before replying.

Negotiators have complex motives and various purposes for asking questions at the negotiating table.Negotiators often do not understand the motives of the question, so they answer according to the routine, and the result suffers instead.And a clever answer should be based on an accurate judgment of the other party's intentions, and it should be unique and innovative.

(3) Some problems can be ignored.

Negotiations sometimes involve issues that damage one's own image, leak or be boring. Negotiators need not be embarrassed about this. The best answer is to ignore them, or to refuse with no comment.

(4) Some questions can only be partially answered.

This means that a certain question includes several aspects. If you answer all the questions in these aspects, you may not be able to fully and clearly express your own position and attitude, or it may be difficult to explain clearly in a certain aspect.And if you force yourself to say something that is not clear, it will be a bad thing, so it is better to answer some aspects selectively at this time.

(5) Some questions may not be answered.

From the perspective of negotiating eloquence skills, it is an effective method to answer questions that have to be answered but are unwilling to answer.At this time, when dealing with the other party, talk about some issues that are both related to and irrelevant to the issue, rambling and rambling, seemingly answering the question, but in fact there is no substantive content.

(6) The method of shirking responsibility can be adopted when necessary.

Some negotiators are often overwhelmed by unprepared questions.When it is inconvenient to answer due to some reasons, you can usually use a method such as "I haven't investigated this question, but I have heard of it..." or "Your question from Mr. XX is very good. I I don’t know which document I’ve read about this issue, but as far as I can remember, it’s probably…” and other ways to shirk responsibility.This kind of answering method can often get better results for those questioners who want to satisfy their vanity, as well as those who do not know the purpose and goal of the question.

(7) Some questions can be answered with comforting methods.

(End of this chapter)