Modern social etiquette and eloquence

Chapter 24 Diplomatic etiquette and eloquence in foreign affairs (1)
With the increasingly frequent exchanges between our country and other countries in the world, people also need to learn and master certain foreign-related etiquette to meet the needs of diplomatic activities.

The basic principle of behavior to keep in mind in diplomatic activities is to respect the national anthem of one's own country and that of other countries.Only in this way can we truly realize equal and friendly exchanges in international activities.Of course, the necessary etiquette is indispensable.

[-]. Welcome and send-off etiquette for foreigners

Foreign-related escorts represent the image of the entire nation and the country. If the speech and behavior of the foreign-related personnel does not meet the etiquette requirements, it may damage the reputation of the individual, the nation, and the country.Therefore, it is very important to know the etiquette of welcoming and sending off foreigners.

The reception etiquette for foreigners includes three parts: the preparation before the reception, the etiquette during the reception, and the etiquette during the meeting and talks.

1. Preparations before seeing off

An appropriate and reasonable welcome ceremony can leave a good first impression on the visitors and make them feel at home; a complete and thoughtful farewell ceremony can leave a beautiful and unforgettable memory for the visitors.Therefore, we should try our best to make foreign guests come here happily and return with satisfaction.

Before arranging the welcome and send-off ceremony, corresponding welcome and send-off activities should be arranged according to the identity, status, nature and purpose of the foreign guests.The specific arrangements are as follows.

(1) Positioning for the reception ceremony.

Positioning for the welcome and send-off ceremony refers to determining the standard of courtesy for receiving guests, and determining the level, status, and position of the person to greet them.

Under normal circumstances, the identity, status, and level of the welcomer should be equivalent to the identity of the guest. If the identities of the two parties cannot be completely equal, a person with a relatively matching position or a deputy can be sent to greet them.

The difference between the identities of the host and the guest should not be too great. It is best to achieve equality between the host and the guest, which is an expression of respect for the guests.When the person being visited cannot come forward to greet him for some reason, the person who greets him should explain clearly to the guest.

(2) Pick-up and drop-off arrangements.

Before welcoming and sending off guests, it should be decided whether to arrange a welcoming and sending off ceremony according to the identity, status, and purpose of the visit of the guests. If necessary, careful planning and arrangements should be made.

(3) Master the arrival and departure time of guests.

Accurately grasping the arrival and departure time of guests is to welcome and send off guests smoothly.It is impolite to make guests wait for the host.Therefore, the escort must master the arrival and departure time of the guests and arrive at the airport, railway station or pier in advance.

2. Etiquette during the reception process

(1 Introduction

When meeting guests, mutual introductions are essential.Under normal circumstances, introduce the host to the guests first, and introduce them in order according to the level of the position.

Introductory work should be.Served by the highest-ranking concierge, receptionist, or receptionist.

(2) gift

When meeting with foreign guests, flowers are mostly used as a meeting gift, because it is more in line with the greeting and sending etiquette of foreign guests, and it symbolizes respect and friendship.

When choosing flowers, pay attention to the fact that the bouquets must be neat and bright. Do not choose yellow flowers such as chrysanthemums, rhododendrons, carnations, etc. These colors are not suitable for occasions where foreign guests are received.

The flower presenters generally choose children or young women. After the main leaders shake hands with the guests, the flower presenters should lose no time in presenting flowers to show their welcome and respect to the guests.

(3) Riding Etiquette

Whether it is to welcome or see off passengers, it is essential to take a bus. During the ride, the accompanying personnel need to know some etiquette.

Under normal circumstances, the person accompanying the car should arrange for the guests to get on the bus from the right door, and the host to get on the bus from the left door, and invite the guests to sit on the right side of the host. position, the position should not be changed at this time.

(4) Arrange meals and lodging

Before predicting the arrival of guests, the host must arrange board and lodging for the guests in advance.

After the guests arrive at the residence, it is not advisable to arrange other activities. Sufficient rest time should be set aside for the guests, and other arrangements should be postponed.

(5) Hospitality

The most taboo thing about welcome and send-off activities is the phenomenon of cold silence and negligence, so that the guests will have opinions on the host.

A successful welcoming ceremony should make the guests feel at home.Relevant personnel attending the welcome and send-off ceremony should be enthusiastic, polite and generous, and strive to create a warm and cordial atmosphere.

3. Etiquette during meetings and talks

Whether it is an official visit, a negotiation, or a courtesy call, the meeting and talks are an important link, the purpose is to strengthen understanding, enhance friendship, and promote cooperation and exchanges between the two sides.

There are certain differences between meetings and talks, but there are many similarities in the etiquette that needs to be observed.

A meeting is an appointment or meeting for a certain purpose.It is called "meeting" or "meeting" in the world; when people with low status meet with people with high status, it is called "meeting" or "meeting"; when people with high status meet with people with low status, it is called "meeting" or "summoning"; The return visit after the interview and meeting is called "return visit".

Talks, mostly used in formal occasions, refer to the exchange and discussion between two or more parties on some major political, economic, cultural, military and other issues of mutual concern, so that the two parties can reach an agreement.Talks can also be used for official and business negotiations.It is a relatively formal activity with strong political and professional nature.

As a courtesy, the host country should, according to the identity and purpose of the visitor, arrange for relevant leaders or department heads to meet with the visitor on the day or the day after the visitor's arrival.

Visitors can also take the initiative to request a visit.If the identities and status of both parties are relatively high, the meetings and talks are generally arranged in a relatively spacious and bright reception room, or they can be arranged in the reception room of the hotel where the guests stay.

Talks can be of two types:
One is bilateral talks and the other is multilateral talks.

Rectangular or oval tables are usually used for bilateral talks, and the host and guest sit facing each other. On the one hand, the guests sit facing the main entrance, and on the other hand, the host sits behind the door.

During multilateral talks, the main speaker is seated in the center.Round or square tables are generally used for multilateral talks.The seat arrangement is not too particular, and the two parties can sit at will.

Full preparations should be made before meetings and talks. The specific requirements are as follows.

(1) Communication before the meeting.

Visitors should make meeting requirements in advance, such as who they want to meet, when they will meet, and what the purpose of the meeting is.

After these requirements are determined, they should be communicated to the receiving party in a timely manner.The receiving party should reply as soon as possible after receiving the notification, and communicate the time and place of the meeting or meeting, the attendees of the main party, and the relevant matters arranged for the meeting or meeting to the visitor in a timely manner. If the situation changes, it should promptly notify the other party and do give a reasonable explanation.

(2) Overall arrangement and equipment preparation.

After the time, place, and list of attendees of meetings and talks are determined, the relevant personnel of the receiving party and relevant units should arrange the meeting place in advance and prepare all the necessary equipment.

(3) Greet guests.

Out of courtesy, the host should arrive at the meeting and meeting place in advance, and greet the guests at the door.

If the host is not convenient to meet at the door, other staff members should be arranged to greet the host and introduce the host to the living room.

(4) The gift of meeting.

After the host and guest meet, the two parties should shake hands and arrange a group photo, and then sit down after the group photo is completed.

(5) Beverage preparation.

Before the meeting starts, the host should prepare drinks.There are no clear regulations on the requirements for beverages in the world. Most people choose tea and soft drinks in our country.

(6) Farewell Etiquette.

After the meeting or talks, the host and guest should shake hands again to show farewell. The host gets up and sends the guests to the door, and then watches them go away.It is impolite to turn away without waiting for the guest to walk away.

Second, foreign banquet etiquette

In order to connect feelings, make friends, promote friendly cooperation between the two parties, and discuss some major issues to reach a consensus, banquets are relatively common in foreign exchanges. Since foreign banquets are of great significance, etiquette is particularly important in the banquet process.

Internationally accepted forms of banquets include banquets, receptions, tea parties, working meals, etc.

Banquet is a very formal and grand banquet, which can be divided into state banquet, formal banquet, casual banquet and family banquet.Attendees are required to sit and eat according to the arrangement of the host.

Reception is much more flexible than banquet, it doesn't need to prepare dinner, and has no fixed seats, but buffet party and cocktail party are common ones. When attending a reception, the host and guest needn't stick to various forms, they can move more freely.

The tea party is simpler, as long as you prepare a few tables, chairs and some snacks in the living room.The tea party is usually held around [-]:[-] pm.

There are generally three forms of working meals: working breakfast; working lunch; working dinner. The characteristics of working meals are time-saving and simple, and the host and guest can exchange opinions while eating. This is an informal form of banquet.

Regardless of the form of the banquet, etiquette must be followed, and the specific requirements are as follows.

1. Preparations before the banquet
(1) Determine the time, place, and personnel.

According to the nature and purpose of the banquet, the identity of the guest of honor, international practices and funds, determine the form, scale, time, place and attendees of the banquet.

(2) Venue layout.

Make menus, arrange venues, and arrange seats.

(3) When inviting guests to attend, invitation cards or invitation cards are required and distributed 1 to 2 weeks before the banquet.

2. Etiquette during the banquet
(1) welcome

Before the banquet, the host should arrive at the banquet hall in advance and greet the distinguished guests at the door.If the owner is inconvenient to go out to meet the guest, he can send relevant personnel to meet him on his behalf.After the guests arrive, the relevant reception staff should guide the guests into the banquet hall or lounge.

(2) start

After the guest of honor arrives, he will be received by the host in person, and accompanied by the host, he will enter the lounge or banquet hall together, and all the guests can take their seats only after the host's permission.At this point, the banquet can officially begin.

(3) Banquet Speech
If the host and the guest of honor want to deliver speeches, they should be arranged after the hot dishes and before the desserts, and sometimes they can also be arranged to deliver speeches when the guests are seated.

(4) The banquet is over

After the host and the guest of honor stand up, other guests can leave.

(5) Farewell of the guest of honor

The host should send the guest of honor to the door, watch the guest of honor leave, and then turn around and return to the room.It is very impolite not to turn around and go back to the room without waiting for the guest of honor to leave.

[-]. Resolutely maintain the national image in terms of language and etiquette

Any form of foreign exchanges is to make foreign friends, maintain the image of the country, and realize national interests.Therefore, our language expression and diplomatic etiquette must abide by the basic principle of maintaining the national image.Maintaining national image has the following two meanings.

(1) Maintain national dignity.

As a sovereign state, in order to occupy a place in the forest of the world and win the respect, trust and support of other countries, the inviolability of national dignity is crucial.Whether it is to express warm and friendly affection to the other party, or to fight tit-for-tat with the other party, we must put the maintenance of the country's image in the first place.This is a manifestation of a country's sovereignty, status, strength and self-confidence, and it is also an important reason why it deserves the respect and trust of other countries.

Former Philippine Foreign Minister Romulo once had a heated debate with Vyshinsky, the head of the former Soviet delegation, at a United Nations meeting. Romulo criticized Vyshinsky's proposal as a "joke."Annoyed, Vyshinsky showed extreme rudeness. He said to Romulo: "You are just a small person in a small country." Compared with the former Soviet Union, the Philippines is just a dot on the map; Romulo put on shoes and was only 1.63 meters tall.Although this is true, these words not only insult Romulo's personality, but also insult the country of the Philippines. If Romulo does not speak out at this time to uphold the dignity of himself and his country, then the image of the country will be damaged. Relations with other countries may also suffer as a result.Therefore, as soon as Vyshinsky had finished speaking, Romulus stood up and told the delegates of the United Nations General Assembly that Vyshinsky was correct in describing him, but he went on to say-“Here and now, there will be Throw the stone of truth between the brows of arrogant giants—it is the dwarf's duty to make them behave a little better."

With these words, Vyshinsky stared straight at him, unable to say anything.Romulo won the respect of himself and his country from representatives of other countries.

(2) Safeguard national interests.

Safeguarding national interests is the purpose of foreign exchanges.The relationship between countries is largely a relationship of interests.Just like what the United States has always preached: "There are no permanent friends, only permanent interests".Each country tries to maintain and realize its own national interests to the greatest extent in this relationship.Moreover, safeguarding national interests is also the key to conducting diplomatic activities and improving diplomatic relations.To establish good relations with other countries, one must first safeguard the interests of one's own country.A truly perfect international relationship should be based on the premise of safeguarding the interests of each country. A relationship between countries established by harming the interests of one country and expanding the interests of another country is unreliable.In addition, national interests are closely related to national image.National image is not an illusory national image that does not pay attention to national interests, or even at the cost of harming or sacrificing national interests; What a piece of paper!Therefore, when we communicate with foreign countries, we must not only establish a good national image in terms of language and etiquette, but also safeguard national interests, and perfectly unify the two.

[-]. A diplomatic attitude that is neither humble nor overbearing
In the social field, the quality of a person's attitude directly affects the atmosphere, process and effect of social activities.So, what kind of communication attitude should we adopt when communicating with the outside world?An attitude of being neither humble nor overbearing should be adopted.

To be neither humble nor overbearing is to show restraint and etiquette to the other party, to be enthusiastic but not attentive, to be cold but not rude, to be angry without losing control...

In the 50s, the United States imposed an embargo and blockade on China, and the relationship between the two countries was tense. The only channel for dialogue and contact between the two sides was the Sino-US ambassadorial meeting held in Warsaw.The atmosphere was tense at the start of the talks.Every time the Chinese and American ambassadors met, they would ask: "Who will speak first today?" So the two sides explained their positions according to their respective speeches, and after speaking, they asked: "When will the next meeting be?" Then they left separately.Later, Ambassador Wang Bingnan returned to China and talked about the atmosphere and scene of the talks with Chen Yi, who was then Minister of Foreign Affairs. Chen Yi said: "It is not always so tense!" "We do not beg for negotiations, nor reject negotiations. , this is the style of a great country.”

In December 1963, Chen Yi was invited to attend Kenya's independence ceremony.At the national ball held in Kenya, the positions of the Chinese and American delegations lined up exactly together.In the period of long-term stalemate in Sino-US relations, this is undoubtedly an extremely delicate scene.Chen Yi neither took the initiative to approach him to get close, nor turned around in anger, but sat down and drank coffee.

There are 3 members of the American delegation: the minister and his wife and the vice chairman of the American Federation of Labor.The minister's wife first spoke to Chen Yi:

"Are you the Chinese delegation?"

"Yes."

"May I chat with you?"

"You can talk, why can't you talk?"

So, the two sides began to chat.When the minister saw that his wife had started, he came over and wanted to toast Chen Yi, but he said in a pretentious manner: "Mikoyan visited the United States in the past, came to my house as a guest, and chatted with my wife. I was punished for this." Rusk's rebuke, let's hope our toast doesn't cause trouble this time."

After hearing this, Chen Yi didn't yell and lash out, but replied in a neutral manner: "You are afraid of trouble, so you don't have to toast with me, and there won't be any trouble."

The minister said hastily again: "I propose, a toast to the improvement of relations between China and the United States one day!"

Hearing this, Chen Yi held up his wine glass and said without feeling angry: "I hope, I believe, that the relationship between China and the United States will one day be able to advance one step further, but the condition is that the US State Department will cancel its hostile aggression against China." policy, that’s the only way it’s possible.”

In this "competition", Chen Yi established a good image of the Chinese foreign minister with his words and deeds of "neither humble nor overbearing, reasonable and restrained", and set a glorious example for us in foreign exchanges.A strong country has a strong country's diplomacy, and a weak country has a weak country's diplomacy.

[-]. Diplomatic titles should be dignified and appropriate
How a representative of a country addresses another country's representative actually expresses the country's attitude towards another country and also reflects the country's image.

Therefore, the appellation in foreign exchanges must be dignified and appropriate; it must be in line with the status of the other party and show the degree of friendship between the two parties.To do this, you need to do the following three things.

1. Use honorifics
It is absolutely not allowed to use nicknames, nicknames, and nicknames to address each other. They must be addressed together with first names, surnames, titles, and honorifics.For example: "Your Excellency XX President", "Dear XX Prime Minister Your Excellency".No part of it can be omitted.

During the Middle East crisis in the 70s, the former Soviet Union was eager to resolve the crisis, so the former Soviet Union tried to put pressure on the United States.Brezhnev sent a letter to US President Nixon, proposing that the Soviet Union and the United States jointly send troops to ensure the implementation of the ceasefire agreement and to ensure some kind of understanding reached by the Soviet Union and the United States.The letter was strong in language, "actually an ultimatum" (Kissinger).In addition to the threatening language in the letter and the request for "immediately giving a clear answer" at the end, the beginning of the letter is also extremely rude, calling "Mr. President".In response, Kissinger commented: "This is one of the most serious challenges a Soviet leader can pose to an American president."

2. Consistent with the degree of closeness

(End of this chapter)