american tragedy

Chapter 64

Chapter 228
At 06:30 the next morning, Clyde had only rested for an hour after returning from Gloversville, and he was worried about how to adjust his relationship with Roberta.Roberta is going to Biltz today.He had promised to send her to Fonda.But now I don't want to go.How can I dismiss it?

Fortunately, he heard Huigen tell Richie the day before that after get off work today, a meeting of heads of various departments will be held in Smith's office, and he is also required to attend.They didn't say anything to Clyde, because his department was under Richie's name.Still, he decided to use it as an excuse.An hour before noon, he left a note on her desk:
Dear, I am very sorry, but I have just been notified that I have to attend the meeting of heads of various departments downstairs at three o'clock in the afternoon.So, I can't drop you off at Fonda, but I'll stop by your house for a few minutes after get off work.I have something for you, please wait for me.Very sorry.I'll be sure to see you when you come back on Wednesday.

Clyde

Roberta was glad at first, not being able to read the letter at once, and thought it contained some good news for the afternoon's events.But a few minutes later, when I opened the letter in the lounge, I immediately became unhappy.Except this time, Clyde also missed the appointment last night, and it was like this again in the morning.According to her, this change is either to alienate her, or to have something on her mind.She did not dare to think what had caused this change. Perhaps he had been obliged to go to the meeting, just as he had been obliged to go to his uncle's house when he had been invited.However, the day before, when he told her that he could not be with her that night, his expression seemed to be very happy, and he was not sad because she was leaving.Does he really know that she will be away for three days? He obviously knows that she is the last thing she wants to leave him, no matter how long.

Her mood immediately went from hopeful to extremely depressed, very worried.This seems to be related to her life full of ups and downs.Now there are two days before Christmas and I have to go to Biltz.Once there, it all depended on whether she could bring some good news, and nothing else would intervene, and she would be left alone.But before he left, he couldn't even stay with him for one more minute.She returned to her seat with an unhappy expression on her face, listless and preoccupied. Clyde seemed to have noticed this change too, but because of Sandra, he couldn't feel any guilt towards Roberta for the time being.

At one o'clock in the afternoon, the siren blew, and it was off work on Sunday.He and Roberta went separately to her house.As he walked all the way, he thought about what to say.What should I do? Even if love becomes cold, how can I pretend to have feelings without feelings? It was still in full swing half a month ago, but now it is no longer enthusiastic.How to proceed? To tell her honestly, or in any way to show her, that he no longer cared about her, would not do, because that would be cruel, and what would happen to Roberta! Moreover, there is still hope for Sandra, but if it is just unreliable, it is not a solution.However, Sandra has expressed her love for the first time, and her future is promising. If the relationship is maintained, can Roberta be abandoned? Why not? Compared with Sandra's beauty and status, Roberta can give What was he? By comparison, was it fair that Roberta demanded his devotion and affection to her last? It was not fair, was it?

He calculated it all the way.Roberta, who walked into her room before him, was also thinking in her heart: Clyde, what happened to such a sudden change, such a sudden indifference, such a decision to cancel the appointment before Christmas, and it is legitimate. She was going home soon, and during these three days, including Christmas, she would not see him for three consecutive days, and he would not even go with Fonda.He said it was because of a meeting, or was it because of something else? If necessary, she could even wait until four o'clock in the afternoon, but what seemed to be hidden in his expression? Ah, what kind of world is this? And not so long ago they had such an intimate relationship.How this intimate relationship combined them into a whole in the first place.Does this herald that their dream relationship will be destroyed? Oh, my God! She gave him everything, and now only his sincere heart is her future and life!

She ducked into her room, thinking about this new problem.Clyde arrived, holding his Christmas present for her in one hand, but insisted on changing his present relationship with Roberta, trying to pretend that nothing had changed if he could.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Roberta," he said vigorously, with an air of cheerful, sympathetic, yet equivocal air. "I don't know at all, but I only found out about the meeting a few hours ago. But you'll see what it's about. You can't get away with things like that, and you won't mind too much." , isn't it?" Because, from the look on her face here and in the factory, he already felt that she was very sad. "It's a good thing I still have the chance to give you this thing," he said, giving her the present. "I wanted to bring it last night, but I was delayed by other things. I've been on this matter from the beginning to the end." I’m so sorry, that’s true.”

If it had been given to her last night, she would have been very happy, but now? Roberta casually put the gift on the table. This gift could have made her extremely happy, but these passions have long since dissipated.

"Did you have a good time last night, darling?" she asked, anxious to know how it would turn out to take him from her.

"Oh, that's pretty good," Clyde replied.This night meant so much to him, but it did so much harm to her.At this moment, he was eager to tell some lies. "I thought it was just going to supper at my uncle's, as I told you. But when I got there, I realized what they really meant was me to accompany Bella and Myra to Gloversville." What a party. It's a rich family, the Steeles, you know. Well, they're having a dance anyway, and they want me to go with them, because Jill can't go. It's no fun though, the dance I'm glad it's over, too." He called Bella, Myra, Gilbert by name, as if he had always been with him in a very intimate relationship, an intimacy that Roberta had always held in awe.

"Then you can't finish it sooner, come here, can you?"

"No, I can't do it, because I have to wait for them to come back together. I really can't go away. Don't you want to open the present and have a look?" He continued, hoping to transfer the matter of missing the appointment to other people. Things go up.She started to open the gift box, and at the same time, she was still thinking that there might be other things happening at the party he had to mention.Was there any girl there besides Bella and Myra? Was he in love with someone else? Sandra Finchley, Bettina Cranston, Jayle, whom he kept talking about? Will they be at the party, Duble?

"Apart from your cousin, who else?" she asked suddenly.

"Ah, and a lot of people you probably don't know. Two or thirty people from all over the neighborhood."

"Who else is there in Lycurgus besides your cousin?" she pursued.

"Oh, a few, we took Jell Double and her sister. Because Bella wanted to do that. By the time we got there, Arabella Star said, Peta Haynes was already in There." He didn't mention Sandra or anyone else he was interested in.

But there was something in the way he spoke, something in his tone and in his eyes.This answer, therefore, was not satisfactory to Roberta.She was indeed disturbed by this new situation, but she felt that it would not be appropriate to question Clyde too closely in the circumstances at hand.He may be disgusted.After all, since I met him, he has often been with people in high society.And she didn't want him to get the impression that she was in charge of him, even though that was what she wanted.

"Last night, I wanted to be with you and give you a gift", she answered him in a different tone, hoping that he would take pity on her on the one hand, and on the other hand go elsewhere for her own thoughts.Clyde could hear the sadness and resentment in her tone, and he was as moved as before, but now he could no longer and would not allow this emotion to dominate his heart like it did in the past.

"But what happened to you today, Roberta," he said, almost in affectation, "I told you just now."

"I know," she answered him sadly, and trying to hide what was on her mind, she unwrapped the paper and opened the box containing the comb.After opening it, her heart also changed slightly.Because she had never owned such a precious and brand new thing before. "Oh, that's really pretty, isn't it?" she exclaimed, involuntarily cheered up. "I didn't expect you to give such a thing. Then, my two presents are nothing compared to it."

She went to get her present at once, but Clyde could see that although his gift had counteracted some of her depression, it was not enough to cheer her up. What she needed was a constant love.

"You still like it, my dear," she replied, looking at the gift with interest, "of course, my dear." "But mine is nothing," she said gloomily.It made her sad that all her plans had come to such an end. "However, it's still useful to you, and it's on your side, on your chest, which is what I meant."

"She handed him the locket containing a gold pencil and a silver pen. She thought they would be useful to his work. If only a fortnight had passed, he would have embraced her, for his sake. To console her for her pain without seeming too distant, but don't go the old way, so he says something warm and hollow about her gift.

"Oh, really, these are wonderful things, my dear, just what I need. It's very nice to send something to carry with me, I can use it often." He pretended to be very happy, and put the two pens Look around, then put it in your pocket, ready to use at any time.She stood in front of him, dejected, with a longing expression on her face, hoping that he would take pity on her, which reminded him of all the charms in her past, so he put his arms around her waist and kissed her.She was pretty, everyone thought so.When she hugged his neck and cried, he held her tight and said no, she would be back on Wednesday and everything would be business as usual after that.But even then it occurred to him that he wasn't telling the truth, and that it was strange that another girl should have had such power to take his heart away from him when he had thought of her not so long ago.The fact was that she might have thought he took her to heart, but in fact she probably never would.For this, he felt really sorry for her.

Roberta felt it too, though she still listened to him and accepted his tender caresses.These are not really true either.His expression was too restless, his hug didn't seem warm, and his tone was not gentle.Then there's a bit of proof: after a while, he wanted to get away, looked at his watch, and said, "Honey, unfortunately I have work and I have to go, and the meeting is about to start. I really want to take a ride with you." , but when you come back, I will come to see you."

He bent down to kiss her, but Roberta felt plainly this time that his affection for her was less than before.He still cared about her and was kind, but his heart was elsewhere.She pulled herself together, restored her self-esteem, and finally said indifferently and simply: "Well, I don't want you to be late, Clyde, you'd better go. But I won't stay until Christmas night .If I come back early on Christmas afternoon, can you come? I don't want you to be late for work on Wednesday."

"Of course, my dear, I will," replied Clyde cheerfully, even eagerly.Because he didn't know what date he would have at that time, and he didn't want to avoid her all of a sudden. "What time do you expect to arrive?"

"The time to come back is eight o'clock."He took out his watch again, saying, "But I must go," and going towards the door.

What is going on with all this and what will happen in the future, she was very worried, so she walked towards him, grabbed his skirt, and said half pleading and half asking: "Now it's Christmas night, Clyde." ? You won't have any other dates then, will you?"

"Oh, don't worry. You know me. I'll be sure to come on Tuesday, my dear," he answered.He kissed her and hurried away.I felt in my heart that maybe he was wrong, but what should I do otherwise.He is clear.A man who wants to break with a girl has to use a little tact and diplomacy, doesn't he? His heart is already going to Sandra and New Year's Eve.He was going with her to the party in Schnackdart, and then he would have a chance to judge whether she cared about him as much as the night before.

After he left, Roberta turned around and looked at his back in the distance sadly from the window, thinking about her relationship with him, wondering what the future would be like? What if he no longer cared about her? Did he Tired of her now, wanting to see her no more? Oh, how dreadful! What would she have done? If she hadn't given her to him, hadn't given it to him as soon as he asked for it, then Enough.

Gazing out the window at the bare, snow-covered branches, she took a breath.Ah, the festival! To leave like this.

(End of this chapter)