american tragedy

Chapter 77 (1)
Chapter 237 (1)
Clyde finally breathed a sigh of relief after hearing the news, but it was only the beginning.For Clyde and Roberta, they still can't really feel at ease until the problem is completely resolved.Not long after hearing the news, he went to her and said that he finally found out the name of a doctor who could help her through the crisis.But he had another thing to do, which was to encourage her to go to the doctor alone, and to make up a story that would not involve his name, and that would arouse the doctor's sympathy, so that He was merciful and just charged a little handling fee.

He had been worried that Roberta would object, but this time she acquiesced.Since Christmas, many aspects of Clyde's attitude have surprised her and made her flustered. In addition, she had no definite plan at first, and she just hoped that she could get through this emergency safely so that she or he She won't make a fool of herself, and then she can go her own way. He doesn't seem to care about her now, and he obviously wants to get rid of her, so she doesn't want to force him to do things he doesn't want to do.Let him go well, she can think of a way by herself, as long as she can get through this difficulty safely.She could do it then, and she can do it now.

However, when she said this to herself, thinking that it meant so much to her, and thinking that the happy days were gone forever, she covered her eyes with her hands and wiped away the tears she couldn't help shedding.Why did it end up like this!

The night he came to see her after finding Short, he looked as if he had done a great job.She listened patiently to his explanation, and then simply said, "Do you know where it is, Clyde? Is it possible to get there by car? Or is it a long walk?" Loversville is not far away, just a suburb actually, and the bus stop is only a quarter of a mile from the house." She then asked, "Is he home at night? Or do we have to go during the day? If we can go at night It's better. It won't be seen by others." Clyde comforted her by saying, "He's home at night." Because Short told him so.She said: "But do you know whether he is old or young? If he is old, I can feel more natural and reliable. I don't like young doctors very much. Our family always finds an old doctor. It feels so much more natural to talk to someone like that.”

Clyde didn't know either, he didn't think of asking about it, but in order to comfort her, he said he was a middle-aged man, which happened to be in line with the facts.

At dusk the next day they both set off for Fonda, but separately, as usual.After arriving at Fonda, they had to change cars. When the car reached the doctor's residence, they got off and walked along a road.

In central winter weather, the road is still covered with frozen snow.This is very convenient for them to move forward quickly.They used to walk slowly and intimately.These days, it's not like that anymore.Roberta kept thinking how, earlier and not so long ago, he must have liked a place like this (not this time, of course), shuffling slowly, putting his hands on her waist, without thinking Talk about everything, how was that night, the work in the factory, his uncle, the latest movie.If possible, where are they planning to go, what do they like to do together, etc.But now... especially this time, maybe the last time, this is the time when she especially needs him to support her loyally! But she can see that what he is most worried about now is that she will go alone like this, will Don't get scared and "retreat".Then there is the question of whether she can say something about the situation at that time, so that the doctor will feel that he must help her, and only charge a handling fee.

"Ah, Roberta, how do you feel? Nothing? You don't feel timid, do you? Oh, I hope so, because this is a good opportunity to solve the problem at once. And, the person you go to It's not that he hasn't done this in the past, you know? Because this guy has done it in the past. Don't know how to escape this disaster, because you don't even have a friend who can help you here. And the reality is that even if you want to go to them, there is no way. People will tell, you know ? Then, if he asks you where I am and what kind of person I am, you say I'm gone, you don't know where I am, I ran away, you know? And you might as well say, you Wouldn't have come to him, but you heard about another guy he helped, a girl told you, you know? But don't say you're paid well, I mean, because, if you Say, I can’t afford to pay what he’s asking for, you know? Unless he promises us to pay in installments over several months, or something like that, you know?”

When Clyde thought that he had brought her all the way here, he felt very nervous, and felt that he must cheer Roberta up so that she would have enough perseverance and courage to successfully complete this task.Little did he know that his taught and inexperienced ideas were far from enough, either to Roberta's urgency, or to the doctor's temperament and temper. Not enough, or even worthless.For her, she felt that she had to go forward, and that she had to go alone.But he only talks about this and that, how easy it is.She felt that most of what he really thought of was only for himself, not for her.He just thought about how to spend less money without causing him any big troubles, so he helped her through this crisis.

On the other hand, even here, at such a time, despite this situation, her heart was still firmly turned to him, his pale face, cold hands, and restless expression.Although she also knew that his purpose of saying these words was to encourage her to do things that he himself had no courage or ability to do, but she was not angry.On the contrary, in her distress she simply said to herself that despite all his rhetoric, she was determined not to listen to him, and that what she intended to say was not that she had been abandoned, because such an expression would be too ugly and humiliating.She was only going to say that she was married and that she and her young husband were too poor at the moment to support a child.She thought for a while, and this statement was exactly the same as the story Clyde made up about the man in the Snakhdart grocery store.In the final analysis, how does he know how sad she is now? Besides, he still refuses to go with her, which makes her feel even more sad.

With a purely feminine instinct to grab someone to give her a little more courage, she turned toward Clyde, grabbed his hands, and stood there silent, wishing he would hold her, pat She, tell her it's nothing, don't be afraid.

Although he no longer cared about her, when she couldn't help showing her trust in him, he spread his hands and hugged her body, the purpose was just to cheer her up.He said: "Ah, take courage, Roberta. Oh, it won't work, you know that. Are you willing to lose your courage when we're here now? Once there, there won't be Nothing. It's nothing, I know that, you just run over there and ring the bell, you know? When he comes out, or whoever comes out, you just say 'I want to talk to the doctor Talk alone.' You know? Then he'll know it's a secret, and that'll be easy."

He added some words of counsel of this kind, and she, seeing in his lack of enthusiasm for her, and realizing the urgency of her situation, summoned up all her courage and said: "You wait here, then, All right? Don't go far, all right? I'll probably be right back." And in the dark he hurried past the gate, toward the path that led to the front door.

She rang the bell, and the person who came out to answer the door was a very dignified Xiaocheng doctor.It is exactly the opposite of what Clyde and Short speculated.He is a typical, very conservative country doctor, very serious and cautious, paying attention to morality and religious concepts, and at the same time, he has some views that he considers to be enlightened, but in the eyes of more enlightened people, he is quite narrow and stubborn.But because the people around him are so ignorant and stupid, he can consider himself at least a fairly learned scholar. He is constantly in contact with stupid, dissolute or solemn, able, conservative, prosperous people of all kinds, so no matter what he meets Whatever is enough to overthrow his inherent opinions, then he tends to retain his judgment of right and wrong and let it go.In terms of appearance, he is short, strong, and has a big round head, but he is very straight, with a pair of gray eyes and a cute mouth. He always smiles. With brown-gray hair, there is always a short lock on the forehead, showing the appearance of country chic.His arms and hands, especially his hands, stubby but sensitive, hung limply at his sides.He is 58 years old, married and the father of three children.One of them was a son, already studying medicine, in order to carry on his father's profession.

He first led Roberta to a very ordinary, but also very messy waiting room, and asked her to wait until he had dinner.After a while, he walked to the door of a room, which was also a very ordinary inner room, or it could be said to be his consulting room.It contained his desk, two chairs, some medical equipment and books.There is obviously another inner room inside, and medical equipment is also placed.He made her sit on a chair.Roberta admired him for his grizzled hair, his solid, sluggish body, and the way his eyes blinked.At least he was old, seemed smart and reserved, maybe not really sympathetic or warm or anything in his attitude.He first looked at her curiously for a while, as if he wanted to see if she lived somewhere nearby.Then he said, "Well, tell me, what is your name? How can I help?" His voice was deep and reassuring, and Roberta was pleased with that.

On the other hand, she thought she was here at last, and was going to tell the truth about her disgrace soon, or never again.In this way, she couldn't help being frightened, so she just sat there blankly, staring at him first, then at the floor, and kept wiggling the small handbag she carried with her fingers.

(End of this chapter)