Queen, go for hegemony

Chapter 54

The weather is warm, ahem, that, the article has come to an end, but the story of the empress is not over yet. In order to give everyone a deeper understanding of the life of the empress after marriage, this interview was specially initiated.Set up the book, sit down with the emperor and the queen, and start to get to the next topic.

1 May I have your name?

Xiaofeng: (glances lightly at the author)
Author: Wiping sweat...Your Majesty skipped, Xiao Yi continued

Xiao Yi: They all call me An Xiaolang... Mr. Author, are you sure you're not mistaken about my gender?

Author: ... (If you make a mistake about the gender, even if I make a mistake as a mother, your majesty can still make a mistake after sleeping, right?)

Audience: Group fights, a certain grass is a bastard...

2 gender is?
Xiaofeng: Does the author dare to doubt my gender?

Author: (Wiping sweat!) Your Majesty, I was wrong, I never doubted it...

Xiao Yi: (laughing at misfortunes) Just plain, even if you doubt His Majesty's gender, it's a test if you don't give it

Author: ...I am not interested in Your Majesty...

Xiaofeng: You mean Zhenmu is attractive?
Xiao Yi: How dare you despise His Majesty?Come on, fork out!
Author: (Holding his head like a dead dog) Let me finish the interview, shall I?Or... can I say that I want to be interested in His Majesty?
Xiao Yi: How dare you miss my husband!Come on, let's fork it out and count it as a bird...

author:……

Xiaofeng: (Smiling and slightly watching his wife behaving unreasonably, with a doting look on her face)

3 When did the two meet?Where?

Xiaofeng: Back then, she was naked in the Bita Forest of the Palace of Chen... (with a look of aftertaste on her face)

Author: Cough, Your Majesty misremembered the bird, it was clearly at the banquet that night, when the little wolf was wearing clothes... (It is said that men's memory is really unreliable sometimes...)
Xiaoyi: When you receive the escort decree, go play with him.

Author: (Bow your head and sweat profusely, women's memory is sometimes even more unreliable, and automatically ignores the embarrassing things they have done)
4 The first impression of the other party?

Xiaofeng: The skin under the men's clothes is like jade. The fly in the ointment is that it's a little thin. It's perfect if you take it home and lock it up.

Author: (A man's focus is always somewhere...cough...)
Xiao Yi: Anyway...not a good man

Author: ...Obviously, I have always remembered that the lakeside was looked down upon, right?Still refuse to admit it!

5 What do you like about each other?

Xiaofeng: Do I need to tell you what I like about her?

Xiao Yi: Your Majesty, let's just tell each other when we are resting at night

(The eyes of the two people are already affectionate and lingering)

The ignored author is crazy: Hey... Hey... Public places, pay attention to the influence!

Two people: Shut up!Don't back down yet!She doesn't wink at all, how can she be a mother? !

6 What do you hate about the other party?
Xiaofeng: Is there anything she hates? (Looking at the author's mother threateningly)
Author: (shuddering, dog-legged fawning) No, silver, which His Majesty likes, is there anything to hate?

Xiao Yi: Actually... (with a shy face) Your Majesty is quite annoying in bed sometimes...

Xiaofeng: What does the queen mean?Let's go, let's go to bed and try it out, I'll change it right away, until you don't hate it!

Xiao Yi: I just hate you for this, can you... a little shorter time...

Author: (Looking at the little wolf enviously, couldn't help sighing) This is really a drought to death, a flood to death from waterlogging

7 What do you call each other?

Xiaofeng: Xiaoyi, Yier, when the children are around, they are called queens. It depends on the situation. Of course, at certain times, it’s okay to call them sweethearts.

Xiao Yi: Your Majesty... (clenching fists) I wouldn't be called a darling if you beat me to death...

Xiaofeng: How can I be willing to beat you...

Xiao Yi: (blushing) Even on that occasion, I’m not a darling...

Author: (curiously leaning over like a girlfriend) What kind of occasion?Can it be filmed?Can you watch it?At worst, you can also listen to the corner, right?
Two people: Get out! (Flying, the sad grass climbed back again... asked loudly: Brothers and sisters, are you going to get married soon? The biggest regret in Cao's life is that he has never heard of the corner, give me a chance first? )
Audience: Group fights! (It’s an interview with Sazi! It’s too late! The author’s mind is so outrageous!)

8 If you use an animal as a metaphor, what do you think the other person is?

Xiaofeng: Little pig, some of her characteristics are very similar to this animal.

Xiao Yi: A beast, he has the physical nature of a beast at certain times.

Author: This answer will tell who is strong and who is weak.

9 If you want to send a gift to the other party, would you send it?
Xiaofeng: As long as the regent is not crawling out of the coffin, nothing else is a problem.

Xiao Yi: I eat his food and drink his food. His whole body is mine... Do I need to give it away?

Author: Xiaofeng is selfless, Xiaolang is really a wolf, what he insists on is mine, what is his is mine, even his whole body is mine... Sigh, it's really bad for a woman to be selfish!
Xiaofeng: (glaring) Do you dare to say that my Xiaoyi is selfish?She's so righteous and cute, I've been raising it for so many years, and I've managed to raise it for a little problem, so I want you to talk too much!

Author: (wronged) I'm a real mother, why can't I take care of it?
Xiaofeng: The water splashed by my married daughter is now under my control...

Xiao Yi: ...you two are crooked...

10 What is your problem?
Xiaofeng: Aren't you your real mother?What's wrong with me you don't know?
Xiao Yi: I have too many problems, and I won't be able to finish talking about it for a while, why don't we talk about it another day?
Author: ...is this a child's paper written by me?I doubt myself so much!

11 What is the opponent's problem?

Xiaofeng: Aren't you your real mother?What's wrong with her you don't know?
Xiao Yi: (laughs, Mimi flatters her husband) Your Majesty's bad habits are also good mistakes... No, how could Your Majesty have problems? You are the author, right?
Author: (almost crying)...I am your own mother...This child paper is really rude...

12 What kind of things does the other party do to make you unhappy?

Xiaofeng: Before I got married, I disappeared. After I got married, I always ran away from home. Now it's better. The children have all learned her style and like to run away from home.Annoying me, I will run away from home one day.

Author: Your Majesty, do you have a place to go?

Xiaofeng: Yes.The whole world belongs to me, it doesn't matter if I run away from home or not. (Sits back again.)
Xiao Yi: (glaring at the author's mother complainingly) What kind of question are you asking?This question should be asked separately.His Majesty, who almost provoked, also started to run away from home.I ran away from home, and he hated my husband in the palace. If he wants to run away from home, do you want me to be my daughter?
Author: Daughter, you haven't answered the question yet...

12 What did you do that made the other person unhappy?
Xiaofeng: When I ran away from home, I brought her back from outside the palace... (Thinking about it, with a satisfied face)

Author: The point is after you bring it back, right?
Xiaofeng: You can retire when you bring it back!All the Tong Shi in Zhen Palace have been beheaded. You have been idle recently, do you want to be Tong Shi?

Author: (shrunk head) This kind of occupation is too risky and not suitable for me.

Xiao Yi: Take the three children to the bedroom, sleep together under the quilt, tell them stories, and rest together.

Author: (Suggestion to daughter sincerely) In fact, you can choose this kind of thing when His Majesty is in court, so that he won't be unhappy!
13 How far is your relationship?

Xiaofeng: Aren't you your real mother?
Xiao Yi: Aren't you your real mother?

Author: ... my mother does not interfere in sexual affairs!And don't listen to the corners...

14 Where did two people first date?
Xiaofeng: Let's go to the Great Chen Imperial City together.

Author: This baby automatically ignores Yan Ping beside her... The eyes are so good!

Xiao Yi: Went to dinner together, was assassinated by the man in black, he almost lost his life...I will never date again...Dating is really terrible...

Author: This kid also automatically ignores Yan Ping beside him... It's a shame that he got hurt because of you!

Yan Ping: (Covering his wound and his heart shattered into scum drifting away) I am a cup!

Author: That's because you don't want to give bribes and gifts. Don't you know that this is popular nowadays?

Yan Ping: I'm going to sue the ICAC!
Author: We give gifts from our own family, and exchange favors, what is the matter with the ICAC?This baby has watched too many TVB TV series...

TVB viewers: (group fight!) You resolve your own conflicts, so what's the matter with TVB?
15 What was the atmosphere of the two of them at that time?

Xiaofeng: She has been holding food for me, even if it doesn't suit my taste, I still swallow it.

Xiao Yi: He has been carrying vegetables for me. I wanted to talk, but there are too many dishes.

Author: ... Does this indicate the attitude of men and women to each other before and after marriage?Before marriage, women want men to shut up. Is it too much sweet talk?Do men want women to shut up after marriage?Is it too nagging?
Xiaofeng: Shut up!
Xiao Yi: Shut up!

Author: Could it be that I accidentally discovered the truth?

16 How far has it progressed then?
Xiaofeng: She is already in my pocket.

Xiao Yi: I became his possession.Bah, it's human!
Author: (Admiration) There is a tacit understanding.But I always feel that Xiao Yi regards himself as a human being, but His Majesty doesn't seem to treat you as a human being?
Xiaoyi: Kick Fei, I'm willing, can you handle it? !
Author: (Nei Niu is full of face) The married daughter poured out the water, and the daughter resigned herself to depravity, God has nothing to do, let alone the mother!
17 Which party confessed first?
Xiaofeng: Do you need to do confession?Just grab it back and it's over?
Xiao Yi: It seems to be me...in front of his hospital bed...

Author: Sure enough, there is a big difference between men and women...

18 How much do you like each other?
Xiaofeng: How can I tell you private words
Xiaoyi: After having a husband, my mother will stand aside!

Author: ...So before you had a husband, you liked my own mother and me?Why didn't I feel it?
19 So, do you love each other?

Xiaofeng: Do you still need to talk about this kind of thing? (The way His Majesty looked at the author's mother seemed to say that you have Alzheimer's disease?)

Xiao Yi: (staring at the author's mother) Didn't you try to make me fall in love with him?

Author: (scratches head) Is it me? I thought you were in love with each other, and now arranged marriages are illegal!

20 If you feel that the other party is suspected of changing his mind, what will you do?
Xiaofeng: Cut off the suspect of her change of heart!

Xiao Yi: ...it seems impossible, right?He already has a change of heart!
Author: (Interested to lean up and whisper) Daughter, are you sure there is a problem with your marriage?
Xiao Yi: Why do I feel that you are mostly gloating?But it really makes you worry for nothing, hasn't he always been a workaholic?
Xiaofeng: Xiaoyi, are you a boudoir grudge?I remember my obligations. I have never been lazy, have I?It seems that the obligation is not enough! (As soon as I pick up my wife and carry it on my shoulders, I will go back to Chonghua Palace to fulfill my duty)
Author: (caught the two of them anxiously) Cough...the interview is not over yet, let's put the person down first, in front of the national audience, it's really indecent.

Audience: (encouraging the cameraman) Carry the camera to the Chonghua Palace.

21 Can you forgive the other party for changing his mind?
Xiaofeng: Is there any chance for her to change her mind?

Xiao Yi: His eyesight has always been bad...

author:……

22 When two people are together, what makes you feel your heart beat faster?
Xiaofeng: Skip.

Xiao Yi: Skip it.

Author: Beat the table!I've wanted to ask this question for a long time, why did Mao skip it when it came to a critical moment?Can you not jump?
Xiaofeng: Then you jump out!
Author: I'm not a frog!

23 What do you feel happiest when doing?

Xiaofeng: As long as she is around me.

Xiaoyi: When eating.

Xiaofeng: (Phoenix eyes darken) It seems that my efforts are not enough!Queen, I think we should go back to the Chonghua Hall first to have a good communication?
Xiao Yi: (dog leg shape) As long as I am with you, I am happy.

Xiaofeng: (Sit down contentedly and continue to wait to be interviewed)

Author: (covers eyes) Can you flirt in another place?
24 Ever quarreled?
Xiaofeng: Is there anything I can't decide?
Xiao Yi: (dog legs) You can decide, Your Majesty.

Author: Daughter, you are so disappointing!I need to find a feminist to educate you!

25 When do you feel loved?

Xiaofeng: When I was stabbed and was about to die.

Xiaoyi: All the time.

Author: Sure enough, love is a miracle, so your Majesty, you came back to life?
Xiaofeng: Cough... (Rarely there is no refutation of the author's words!)

Here are fifteen spicy questions
26 May I ask whether you are the attacker or the recipient?
Xiaofeng: Is there even a need to ask?

Xiao Yi: I have been trying my best to counterattack...but I have never succeeded!

Author: Daughter, you are too sad!
27 Are you satisfied with the current situation?

Xiaofeng: (Looking at Cao Mama coldly, without saying a word.)
Xiao Yi: (kindly helping to explain) Your Majesty is very dissatisfied with your question.

Author: (shuddering) Your Majesty, please be patient, it will be over soon... Your Majesty...

28 The location of the first H?
Xiaofeng: East Palace.

Xiaoyi: The Eastern Palace of Qi State.

Audience: We didn't even see it!

Author: Whoever is impatient to live, can go and watch!

29 How did you feel at that time?
Xiaofeng: (with a gluttonous smile.)
Xiaoyi: ...recalling it, it was a night of blood and tears...

Xiaofeng: Didn't you feel satisfied then?

Xiao Yi: ...Is it you who are satisfied?
Author: (Excited like chicken blood, are you finally going to quarrel? Set up your notebook and record it on the spot.)
Xiaofeng: (affectionately clinging to Xiaoyi's hand, bowing her head in repentance) It's my husband's fault, and I will compensate you more in the future.

Xiao Yi: (shuddering, it would be terrible not to make up for it... I can't imagine what will happen to her after the compensation is over...)
Author: (I'm so depressed I can't wait to scratch the wall, why can't I quarrel?)

30 What did the other party look like at that time?
Xiaofeng: You are not a man, you will not understand.Besides—you don't have to understand.

Author: (I am not a man because of Mao! Sad and indignant!)

Xiao Yi: A melancholy lion, he accidentally attracted sympathy...so he was dismantled and eaten...Actually, I thought he was just pretending...

Xiaofeng: Appropriate melancholy can help trigger a partner's motherhood...

Author: ... This already belongs to the hunting theory, and it does not belong to the scope of this interview. We should make an appointment for another interview.

31 What is your first word in the morning of the first night?
Xiaofeng: ...

Xiao Yi: When you wake up, you don’t see people or birds...

Author: Daughter, why would such a man come here?Or go home with your mother?

Xiaofeng: (glances at the guard standing at the door)
Author: Daughter, being able to marry His Majesty is simply a blessing from a previous life, so cherish it, don't run away from home just because you have nothing to do... Mother, I will go home in a while, and I will come to see you when I am free.

Xiao Yi: It's unreliable, mother of Qin Muchu, it's a pity I didn't listen to you
Author: Hey, hey... Daughter, can you use idioms?Wooden culture is terrible!The character of being a mother is very reliable...although a little bit...

32 times per week H?
Xiaofeng: Ask Tong Shi.

Xiaoyi: I never calculated...

Author: (spreading hands) There is no such official in the palace, I have checked, since Nai took up the post of His Majesty.

Xiaofeng: That's your business.

Author: (Breaking tears) Don't bring such a bully...

33 Under ideal circumstances, how many times a week?
Xiaofeng: It depends on her physical condition.

Xiaoyi: (wiping off sweat) I think the pear is so big!
Author: In other words, as long as her physical condition allows, there will be no window period?

What kind of H is 34?
Xiaofeng: (Suddenly glances at Xiaoyi beside him with great interest, and says "Flying Immortal from Heaven") People who practice martial arts have very soft bones.I heard that a thing called yoga is popular among the people recently. After practicing, the muscles and bones will become softer, and the queen can practice it.

Xiao Yi: (Looking at His Majesty in horror) I don't want to challenge difficult movements anymore...

Author: (chokes a mouthful of saliva excitedly) It's too imaginative...

35 Your most sensitive place?
Xiaofeng: As long as she knows.What does it have to do with you?

Author: (embarrassed) Actually, all the female viewers asked me to ask.

Xiao Yi: As long as it is him...everywhere is sensitive.

Xiaofeng: (Boldly discussing with his wife on the spot) Isn't that where you are most sensitive?

Xiao Yi: (blushing) There are also very sensitive there...

Author: Where is it?I am really anxious to death!
Two people: Shut up!
Audience: Shut up!Can't you let them discuss it?
Author: (Tears of Wide Noodles) This is an interview, not Chonghua Hall!

36 What is the most sensitive part of the other party?
Xiaofeng: (refused to answer)

Xiao Yi: What do you want to do?
Author: Excuse me, this girl's vigilance is really high, I really don't have any malicious intentions, this is in response to the request of the female audience...

Audience: Damn, who are you kidding?Obviously you want to satisfy your WS psychology...

37 H places you want to try?

Xiaofeng: There are many, and they are currently being realized one by one.

Xiaoyi: ...

author:……

38 Have you ever had sex with someone other than your lover?

Xiaofeng: No.

Xiaoyi: No.

Author: ...so boring...

Xiaofeng: I don't think it would be boring to kill you.

Author: ... so happy, so happy!
39 Do you agree or disagree with the idea of ​​"If you can't get the heart, at least you have to get the body"?

Xiaofeng: The body is mine, and the heart is in the flesh, can I still run away?

Author: (mopping sweat) Your Majesty, that's not the case.

Xiao Yi: Your Majesty has already answered.

Author: It turns out that both of them are material hedonists...

40 What would you do if the other party was raped by thugs?
Xiaofeng: If you dare to write such a plot, I will kill you... No, Ling Chi will execute you!
author:……

Xiao Yi: It's fine if he doesn't rape others, how dare others rape him!
Xiaofeng: Wife, do you not believe in my character?

Xiaoyi: Of course I believe you, isn't this what this bastard asked? ! !
Xiaofeng: (glaring at the author) Are you finished?Why don't you back down quickly?
Author: Audiences, for our welfare, I almost lost my life. If I die, please remember to burn me some little yellow books next year...

Audience: Cut!Would the Palace of the Underworld dare to accept this kind of bastard?

Author: These people with no conscience, I will never serve them again!That's all for the interview! (Throw away the interview book and leave!)
So what happened to His Majesty, An Xiaolang, and the audience who were left out in the air, I really really don't know wow! ! ! ! ! !

(End of this chapter)