Fifth personality SwanLake

Chapter 166 [The Funeral Garden] Weary of the World

1.
Aesop Carr.

I wrote my name on the paper, and under the surprised eyes of everyone, I frowned in disgust, and made the white mask a little tighter.

I hate living people, they are like walking bacteria in my eyes, like a group of dirty worms moving before my eyes.

They seemed to be extremely shocked by my silence, and they looked at me with strange eyes, as if they were looking at something weird.

I resented the way they stared at me, making me feel like I had contracted some nasty disease.

Enter the mortuary.

I went on to write my occupation on the paper.

When I finished writing about my career, I could clearly sense the fear in their hearts.

They are afraid of death, and they can't accept my unlucky job. They are afraid of being stuck to a half-life, and avoid me like the plague.

I don't care at all, I have no interest in this meaningless communication at all.

I don't want to show some deep affection for teammates with them, and I have seen through their tricks of playing knives after they are hypocrites.

I am withdrawn and unkind.

I enjoy this moment of peace.

In other words, I hate living life so much.

2.
It wasn't until I met that little girl that I realized that there are still such stalkers in this world.

When she saw my occupation, her green agate-like eyes burst out with light, and her fair face was dotted with freckles, making her look a little cute.

She was wearing a straw hat, and her short flaxen hair made her look more energetic. She was dressed in a smart denim jacket, and she was holding a not-so-big toolbox in her hand.

She introduces me.

"Aesop Carr, hello, my name is Emma Woods."

She raised a very sweet smile.

In the eyes of others, it must be like a little sun.

In my eyes, the world is covered with a layer of gray, and she looks better when she smiles than when she cries. Maybe I am the pursuer of tragedy.

I took a few steps back in disgust, making sure to keep a safe distance from her, God knows how much I hate living people.

"The mortician? Sounds like a pretty good job~"

She seemed unaware of my dislike for her, talking to me on her own.

I can't easily tell how much is false and how much is true in the words of the person in front of me.

To put it bluntly, they are a bunch of people who are greedy for life and afraid of death.

3.
Everyone wants to stay away from me.

And she just wanted to get close to me.

She ignored my disgusted gaze and tried to drive me to chat instead. She is really a strange person.

Strange living beings.

I am usually used to being alone, but now this chattering girl has been around me and refuses to give up, she makes me feel a little irritated.

Living people are really troublesome creatures.

In the end I couldn't bear it anymore, and held a conversation with her with a pen and paper, telling her not to stay next to me anymore, I hate living people, she makes me feel very troubled.

"Then Aesop Karl, why do you hate the living?"

She seemed very interested in the question.

Suppressing the feeling of vomiting in my heart, facing living people, I always feel that they are extremely dirty. In order to free me, I continued to explain to her with paper and pen.

"Because living people make me think they are dirty. In my eyes, they are like bedbugs in the sewer. They are extremely disgusting and can make me infected with diseases."

"Eh?~ But Aesop Carl, aren't you alive?"

Her tone was full of doubts, and my heart seemed to be pulled hard, yes, why, I am still alive, why am I not dead yet.

Become the person you hate the most.

I also want to seek death in the past and end the life of hating myself, but I still have a wish, I want to find someone who has a smiling face when he dies.

I don't know how many people I have painted exquisite make-up for. They have different expressions, but none of them have a smiling face, that kind of relieved smile.

I've been looking for it all my life.

"While I hate you, I also hate myself."

When she saw my handwriting, she was slightly taken aback.

4.
"Coincidentally, like Mr. Carl, I am loathing myself."

The corners of her mouth curled up, but there was no smile in her eyes. Seeing that my face was not looking well, she immediately backed away and kept a distance from me.

"I'm useless, I can't protect the people I want to protect, they always say I'm too weak, they will protect me."

She talked on her own, and I didn't have the energy to listen to her long speech. The feeling of being in contact with living people really made me feel dizzy.

"When my companion stands in front of me regardless of everything and dies for me, I feel a deep sense of disgust and powerlessness towards myself."

There seemed to be tears in her eyes.

Living people always drop some cheap water.

They call it tears.

I turned my pen around, intending to write a few words of comfort, but I realized that I was doing this as if it was unnecessary, and I had to stop because of the nausea.

5.
She came to me again, and because of her frequent visits, I had to acclimatize and be able to communicate with her normally on paper, if she didn't get too close to me.

She is such a weird person. From the first day I came, no one came to talk to me. Instead, she was the first person to talk to me frequently.

"Hey, Mr. Carl, after I die, will you help me paint my makeup?"

Her eyes looked forward to me, what was she thinking?Shouldn't normal people be thinking about how to live?

"meeting."

I still responded to her truthfully, no matter who they are, as long as they die, I will put makeup on them and let them leave this dangerous world with dignity.

"Then I want the best makeup."

She blinked her eyes, as if there were stars in her eyes, and it was the first time she saw that there were still living people who were so keen on makeup.

"it is good."

I still respond like this.

In the carnival game, I am still alone, and they do not interfere with my actions.

I've been lucky enough to survive game after game, facing teammates who died in the game.

I will prepare a decent legacy for them.

Let all the souls rest in peace, this is what I should do, only for corpses, I will not show any disgust.

6.
She didn't know where she found a very old camera, because it was very old, and the photos it took were probably black and white.

She got it fixed by a mechanic and came to me with it and asked me to take a picture of her, I frowned and wiped all the places I was going to get my hands on with a handkerchief.

She smiled slightly at the camera, and I captured the angle of view at that moment, took a photo, and after it was developed, it turned out to be a black and white photo, as I expected.

She is holding the photo and looks very happy, I don't know what she is happy about, does that photo look like a posthumous photo?
"Mr. Carl, I have a game for me this afternoon."

"If I protect others, am I useful?"

Her voice was full of excitement, as if the game could make her happy, she put the black and white photo on my desk, chatted with me a few words and left.

I picked up the black-and-white photo with a handkerchief, for fear of getting bacteria from living people. The girl in the photo had an ugly smile.

I lost the photo casually, and I don't know where it went.

I also didn't notice the corners of my mouth raised at the moment.

7.
The bell of night has struck.

She didn't come back.

When only one of the four people who went out for the game in the afternoon came back, I already knew the truth. She died in the carnival game.

The man sobbed and cried, saying that Emma Woods died because of her. Originally, Emma Woods could escape alone, but he ran back to block the damage for her and let her escape.

In the end, only she escaped from the game, and everyone else died.

I watched her cry quietly, and a strong sense of disgust struck again, disgusting living person.

Her body was brought back by Ms. Nightingale. She lay peacefully in the crystal coffin with a smile on her lips.

My eyes felt like they were stabbed by a knife edge, and this is what I've been looking for my whole life.

I painted the best posthumous makeup for her, and I found that my hands were trembling, and her words seemed to be echoing in my ears.

"Actually, I also hate myself. I am very useless, and I need others to protect everything."

"It also caused so many people to sacrifice their lives to create a glimmer of life for me."

"If only I were the one who died, I wouldn't feel so much guilt."

I put on the perfect makeup for her.

I placed white candles beside her crystal coffin, and the flames flickered. I picked off the white roses blooming in the garden and put them in the crystal coffin.

She fell asleep, and I stayed by her crystal coffin for three days and three nights. Those disgusting living people said that her body was already decomposed and asked to be buried in the soil, otherwise it would affect the air they breathe.

"Give me a little more time, it will be soon."

This is the first and last time I will speak to them.

8.
I finally found the black-and-white photo I had lost. The girl in the photo is smiling like a flower.

I seem to have obtained a treasure, and against the candlelight, there seems to be sparks beating in my eyes.

I lit the old black and white photo, and the girl in the photo was gradually swallowed by the flames. I threw it at the curtain, and the curtain was immediately ignited. It seems that there will be a fire here in a short time.

I picked up the knife I usually used to carve wood, cut open the artery in my left hand, and lay on the edge of the crystal coffin to accept death peacefully, while the other hand gently covered her hand.

"Got you."

The loss of blood did not make me feel any panic. Thinking of the ugly faces of those living people, I felt that death was so beautiful.

I have been searching for so long.

I'm tired, it's time to take a good rest.

I hate living people, myself, and the world so much.

I can finally find a place to stay.

(End of this chapter)