Norse gods

Chapter 10 Freya's Strange Wedding
The majestic Thor, the invincible Thor, the strongest, bravest and fearless Thor of the Aesir has not fully woken up, but at this moment, he already felt that something was wrong.He reached out with one hand for his hammer, which he always had with him when he slept.

He closed his eyes and groped for a long time.He reached out to grab it, trying to grab the familiar handle of the hammer.

No hammer.

Thor opened his eyes.He sat up.He stood up.He walks up and down the room.

There was no sign of his cherished hammer anywhere.His hammer was gone.

Thor's hammer was named Mjolnir.It was forged for Thor by the dwarves Brock and Itri.If Thor hit something with it, it would be destroyed; if he threw the hammer at something, it would always hit the mark, and fly back out of nowhere, back into his hand.He can shrink the hammer and hide it in his clothes, or he can make it bigger.The hammer is perfect, except for one thing: it has a slightly shorter handle, which means Thor can only wield it with one hand.

This hammer defends the gods of Asgard from dangers from other worlds.Frost giants, golems, trolls, and all sorts of other monsters fear Thor's hammer.

Thor loved his hammer.But the hammer was gone.

When things don't go right, Thor's response generally goes something like this: The first thing he does is ask himself if it's Loki's fault.Thor thought for a moment.He didn't think Loki had the guts to steal his hammer.So, he did the second thing he always did when things weren't right, and went to Loki for help.

Loki is very smart and very methodical.Loki would tell him what to do.

"Tell no one," Thor said to Loki, "that Asgard's hammer has been stolen."

"This," Loki frowned, "is not good news. Let me see what clues I can find."

Loki came to Freya's temple.Freya is the most beautiful goddess among the gods.Her blond hair fell in curls to her shoulders and glistened in the morning light.Freya's two cats roam the temple and can't wait to pull her cart.Around her neck was the Brinsings necklace, as bright and yellow as her golden hair. This necklace was custom-made for Freya by the dwarves in the underground.

"I want to borrow your feathered cloak," said Loki, "the one that will fly when you wear it."

"There's no door," Freya said. "That's my most precious thing. It's worth more than gold. I won't let you hang around in it and do some silly tricks."

"Thor's hammer has been stolen," Loki said. "I must find it."

"I'll get it for you," Freya said.

Loki put on a feather cloak, turned into a falcon, and flew around.He flew over Asgard, into the heart of the giant kingdom, looking around, looking for unusual places.

Loki soared, and he saw a huge grave below him, on which sat a monster weaving a dog collar.It was the biggest, ugliest monster Loki had ever seen.Seeing Loki in the form of a falcon, the monster smiled with its pointed teeth, raised its head and waved to Loki.

"Loki, how are the Asa gods doing recently? Is there any news from the elves? Also, why did you come to the kingdom of giants alone?"

Loki stopped beside the troll. "There is only bad news from Asgard, and only bad news from the elves."

"Really?" the monster asked, and he laughed to himself, as if he had done something bad, and he was complacent about it and thought he was extremely smart.Loki recognized the laugh.Sometimes that's how he himself laughs.

"Thor's hammer is gone," said Loki. "Do you know what it is?"

The monster scratched his armpits, and smiled to himself for a while. "I might know," he admitted, and then he asked, "How's Freya doing? Is she still as beautiful as ever?"

"If you like her that way," Loki said.

"Oh, I like it," said the goblin, "I like it very much."

Silence, disturbing silence.The monster put down the dog collar in his hand, placed it on top of a pile of dog collars, and then began to weave a new one.

"Thor's hammer is with me," the goblin told Loki. "I hid it so deep in the ground that no one could find it. Not even Odin. I'm the only one who can get it back." .I can give it back to Thor if you give me what I want."

"I can redeem the hammer," said Loki, "I can bring you gold and amber, I can bring you treasures beyond count—"

"I don't want that," said the goblin, "I want to marry Freya. Bring Freya within eight days. As a dowry, I will return the Hammer of the Gods, on the day of my wedding with Freya." night."

"Who are you?" Loki asked.

The goblin grinned, showing his crooked teeth. "Loki, son of Laufey, I am Solem, the king of monsters."

"I am sure we will come to an agreement, great Solem," said Loki.He wrapped Freya's feather cloak tightly, stretched his arms, and flew towards the sky.

Beneath Loki, the world seemed small.He looked down at forests and mountains as small as a child's toy, and the problems facing the gods were nothing more than trifles.

Thor was waiting for him in the middle of the Forum of the Gods, and before Loki landed, he was caught by his huge hands. "Well? What do you know. I can see it in your face. Tell me what you know, tell me now. I don't believe you, Loki, I'm going to know what you've discovered now, Before you have the opportunity and time to start plotting."

For Loki, plotting is as easy and natural as breathing, and he laughs to himself in the face of Thor's anger and innocence. "Your hammer was stolen by Solem, who is the king of monsters," he said. "I persuaded him to return the hammer, but he asked for a price."

"Fair enough," Thor said, "at what price?"

"In the wedding hall, Freya's slender hands."

"He wants only her hand?" Thor hoped.She had two hands, after all, and might be persuaded to give one without much argument.Didn't Tyr just do that?

"All of her," Loki said. "He wants to marry her."

"Oh," said Thor, "she won't like it. Then, tell her the news. You'll be more persuasive than I, since I don't have a hammer now."

Together, they came to Freya's temple again.

"I'll return your feathered cloak," said Loki.

"Thank you," Freya said. "Have you found out who is responsible for stealing Thor's hammer?"

"It's Solem, the king of monsters."

"I've heard of him. A nasty bastard. What does he want us to give in exchange?"

"You," said Loki, "he wants to marry you."

Freya nodded.

Thor was relieved that she seemed to buy into the idea easily. "Put on the bridal crown, Freya, and pack your bags," he said. "You and Loki are going to the Land of Giants. We must marry you off before Solem changes his mind. I want my hammer back."

Freya said nothing.

Thor noticed that the earth seemed to shake, and so did the walls.Freya's two cats meowed, hissed, and hid under a box of furs.

Freya clenched her hands tightly into fists.Her necklace, Brinsings, tumbled from her neck and fell to the floor.She herself didn't seem to notice at all.She stared at Thor and Loki like they were the meanest, most repulsive gangsters she'd ever seen.

Thor was relieved when Freya started talking again.

"What do you think I am?" she asked very quietly. "You think I'm so stupid? Think I can be replaced so easily? I'm a god who would marry a monster for your convenience? If you two think I'm really Will go to the land of giants, will wear the bridal crown and veil, will endure... the monster of lust... will really marry him... then..." She broke off.The walls began to shake again, and Thor feared that the whole temple would collapse on top of them.

"Get out!" Freya said, "What kind of goddess do you think I am?"

"But my hammer..." said Thor.

"Shut up, Thor," Loki said.

Thor shut his mouth.They left the temple.

"She is very beautiful when she is angry," said Thor, "and I can see now why the Goblin wants to marry her."

"Shut up, Thor," Loki said again.

The two of them summoned all the gods in the great hall.All the gods and goddesses were present except Freya, who refused to leave her temple.

They spent the whole day discussing and arguing.No doubt they needed to take Mjölnir back, but how?Each made their own suggestions, but each one was rejected by Loki.

In the end, only one remained unspoken: Heimdall, the farsighted, god who watches over the world.Within the Nine Great Worlds, nothing can escape Heimdall's eyes. Sometimes, he can even see things that haven't happened yet.

"So," said Loki, "what do you think, Heimdall? Do you have any suggestions?"

"I have," said Heimdall, "but you won't like it."

Thor thumped the table hard. "It doesn't matter whether we like it or not," he said, "we are gods! We are gathered here, and there is nothing we would not do to take Mjölnir back. Tell us your idea, if it is a good one, We'll love it."

"You won't like it," said Heimdall.

"We'll love it!" Thor said.

"Well," said Heimdall, "I think we should dress Thor up as a beautiful bride. Give him the beautiful dazzling necklace Brinsings, give him the bride's wreath, give him Tuck it up, make him plump and goddess-curvy, put a veil on him, dress him in that tinkling tinsel just like a goddess, decorate him with jewels—”

"I don't like the idea!" Thor said. "People will think... well, first of all, they'll think I like wearing women's clothes. That's absolutely not okay. I don't like the idea. I'll never wear a bridal veil Yeah. No one thought it was a good idea, did they? It's a totally terrible idea. I have a beard. I can't shave my beard off."

"Shut up, Thor," said Loki, son of Laufey, "that's a great idea. If you don't want giants invading Asgard, put me in a wedding dress, the veil will cover your face— —and your beard."

The supreme Odin spoke. "That's a good idea indeed. Well done, Heimdall. We're going to get the hammer back, and that's the best way to do it. Goddesses, get busy with Thor's wedding night."

The goddesses prepared clothing for him.Frigga, Fulla, Sif, Eden, and other goddesses, including Freya's stepmother Skadi, also came to help.They adorned him with the most exquisite and beautiful garments, such as a noble goddess would wear on her wedding day.Frigg went to Freya and brought back from her the necklace Brinsings, which she put on for Thor.

Thor's wife, Sif, hangs her gold plate by Thor's side.

Eden brought all her jewels and hung them all over Thor to make him look radiant and sparkle in the candlelight.She also brought a hundred rings, red gold and white gold, and put them on Thor's fingers.

They covered his face with a veil so that only his eyes were visible from the outside, and Vaal, the goddess of marriage, placed a glittering tiara on Thor's head: a bridal garland, beautiful and dazzling.

"I think there's something wrong with the eyes," Val said. "They don't look feminine at all."

"I hope they don't," Thor murmured.

Val stared at Thor. "If you pull the veil down, it covers your eyes, but you can still see out."

"Do your best," Loki said, and then he added, "I will go with you to the Land of Giants as your maid." Loki changed form as he spoke, and now he was It's a beautiful maidservant. "Okay. How do I look?"

Between breaths, Thor seemed to mutter something, but no one could hear it clearly, which was probably a good thing.

Loki and Thor climbed into Thor's chariot, pulled by two goats, Tooth Grinder and Tooth Grinder.They are jumping in the sky and can't wait to set off.Wherever they pass, the mountains will be split in two, and the earth will burst into flames beneath them.

"I don't feel good," Thor said.

"Don't talk," said the girlish Loki. "Let me say anything. Remember that? If you talk, it's all screwed up."

Thor muttered something.

They landed in a yard.There, several huge, black-coated giant cattle stood quietly.Each of these few cows is bigger than a house.Their horns are covered in gold, and the yard reeks of their excrement.

A loud voice came from the huge hall. "Move them, you fools! Spread clean straw on the bench! What do you think you're doing? Either pick it up, or cover it with straw, and don't leave it there to rot. This is Freya, the crowd The most beautiful thing in the world, Niord's daughter, is coming to us. She doesn't want to see this."

There was a straw-paved path in the yard. After getting off the chariot, Thor and the maidservant Loki in disguise lifted their skirts and walked across the straw path to prevent the skirts from getting mud.

A huge woman awaits them.She said she was Solem's sister.She bent down, squeezed Loki's pretty cheeks with two fingers, and poked Thor with her pointed nails. "Is this the most beautiful woman in the world? I don't see it at all. And when she lifts her skirts, I see her ankles are as thick as a stump."

"That's because of the light. She's the most beautiful of all the gods," Loki's transformed maiden answered eloquently, "and when she lifts her veil, I swear you'll be overwhelmed by her beauty. So where's her bridegroom? Wedding Where is the banquet? She is looking forward to all this, and I can't control her very much."

At sunset, they were ushered into the main hall of the wedding banquet.

"What if he lets me sit next to him?" Thor whispered to Loki.

"Then you must sit next to him. That's where the bride should sit."

"But he might try to put his hands on my lap," Thor whispered uneasily.

"I'll sit among you," said Loki, "and I'll just say it's our custom."

Solem sat at one end of the table, Loki beside him, and Thor on a stool beside him.

Solem clapped his hands, and huge attendants walked in one after another.They carried five whole roasted oxen, enough food for all the giants; they also brought in twenty roasted salmon, each one as big as a ten-year-old boy; and finally they brought in dozens of trays Small snacks and desserts are given to the women.

There were five more servants behind them, each carrying a full cask of mead.The barrel was huge and heavy, and the giants holding the barrel swayed in their steps, trying to keep their balance.

"Today's feast is for the beautiful Freya!" Solem said. He was about to say something more, but Thor had already started eating. If the bride-to-be had started eating and Solem was still talking, then It's out of decorum.

The servant brought a plate of pastries for women, and placed it in front of Loki and Thor.Loki picked up the smallest piece of pastry carefully.Thor carefully swept up all the other pastries, and then, with the sound of chewing, they all disappeared under the veil.The giantesses who had been looking at the plate of cakes with high expectations and hungry stomachs all looked at "beautiful Freya" with disappointment.

But the beautiful Freya hasn't really started eating yet.

Thor ate the whole cow by himself.He also ate seven salmon, down to the bones.Whenever a plate of pastries was presented to him, he would gobble it all up, leaving the other women hungry.Sometimes Loki would kick him under the table, but Thor ignored the signals and continued eating intently.

Solem patted Loki on the shoulder. "Excuse me," he said, "but lovely and beautiful Freya has just finished her third barrel of mead."

"Of course, she drank three barrels." The girl who turned into Rocky said.

"It's amazing. I've never seen a woman eat so much. I've never seen a woman eat so much and drink so much mead."

"Well," said Loki, "of course there is an all too obvious explanation." He took a deep breath while watching Thor suck a whole salmon into his mouth, then pull a salmon out from under the veil. Comes complete with fish skeleton.The whole process looks like magic.Loki wondered, what is this all-clear explanation?

"With this one, she ate a total of eight salmon," Solem said.

"Eight days and nights!" said Loki suddenly, "she has not eaten for eight days and nights, and she is so eager to come to the land of giants, to see her husband, and to make love with him. Now she has come Your side finally started to eat." The girl turned to Thor. "It's good to see you eating again, honey!" she said.

Thor glared at Loki from under the veil.

"I should kiss her," Solem said.

"I don't advise you to do this. It's not the time yet," Loki said, but Thorem was already leaning in, making noises about kissing.He reached out with one huge hand to reach Thor's veil.The girl Loki turned into reached out to stop him, but it was too late.The sound of the kiss stopped instantly, and Solem bounced back into his seat, trembling all over.

Solem patted the shoulder of the girl Loki transformed into. "Can I talk to you?" he said.

"of course."

They got up and walked to the other end of the hall.

"Why are Freya's eyes so... so terrifying?" Solem asked. "They look like a fire is burning in them. A beautiful woman's eyes should not be like that!"

"Of course not." Loki's transformed girl responded smoothly, "Of course you wouldn't expect her eyes to become like that. She hasn't slept for eight days and nights, holy Solem. She is loved by you Fire consumes, sleepless, she is madly obsessed with your love. She burns unbearably for you! That's what you see in those eyes. Burning passion."

"Oh," Solem replied, "I see." He smiled and licked his lips with his tongue, which was bigger than a human pillow. "okay then."

They go back to the table.Solem's sister had already sat down in Loki's seat.She sat beside Thor and flicked Thor's hand with her nails. "If you were sensible enough, if you knew what was at stake, you should give me all your rings now," she said, "all your beautiful gold rings. You think you'll be a perfect Outlander. You need someone to remind you, or things may not be so pleasant. Don't you need help now that you are married far away, so far from home? You have so many rings, Give me some presents for the bride. They are beautiful, red and gold..."

"Is it time for the wedding?" Loki asked.

"Exactly!" Solem replied.He bellowed: "Bring out the hammer and witness the wedding! I will place Mjölnir on the lap of fair Freya. Let Val, goddess of vows between men and women, protect and witness our love."

Carrying Thor's hammer are four giants.They brought the hammer out from the depths of the hall.It shone slightly in the firelight.It took all their strength to get it onto Thor's lap.

"Now," said Solem, "let me hear your beautiful voice, my love, my little white dove, my little sweetheart. Tell me how much you love me. Tell me you will be me bride. Tell me, you will swear to me, as women have sworn to men since ancient times, as men have sworn to women since ancient times. How about it, tell me?"

Thor grasped the handle of the hammer with a hand full of gold rings.He squeezed it, feeling very solid.The hammer in the hand is so familiar and comfortable.He laughed, a low, loud laugh.

"What I'm saying is," said Thor in a voice like thunder, "is that you shouldn't have stolen my hammer."

He raised his hammer and hit Solem with a fatal blow.The monster fell on the straw-covered ground and never got up again.

All the giants and goblins—the guests who came to this wedding that never happened—fell under Thor's hammer.Including Solem's sister, who receives an unexpected bride's gift.

After the hall fell silent again from the screaming and noise, Thor called out: "Loki?"

Loki recovered his form, he crawled out from under the table, looked around, and estimated the power of the massacre. "Well," he said, "it looks like the problem has been solved."

Thor took off the woman's dress and accessories, and finally breathed a sigh of relief.At this moment, he was only wearing his underwear, standing in the hall covered by the giant's corpse.

"It's done! The trip wasn't as bad as I thought it would be," he said cheerfully. "The hammer is back and the stomach is full! Let's go home."

(End of this chapter)