Chapter 1 Preface
It took two full years to write this book.

Since May [-], [-], I stopped writing intermittently, and finally got through it in January, [-], and then stranded for a while. I haven’t seen you for many days, and I saw myself again. The strangeness of his works made me unable to help but recognize what Roland Barthes said "the author is dead".Re-examining this work, there are too many dissatisfaction.But it was helpless that the creation time was too long at the beginning, which stretched the front line.Let me re-experience the state of mind at that time and modify it, which is tantamount to idiotic dreaming. I am afraid that I will change it into four different images. It is better not to move it, so that the words at that time become the witness of the twin years, and let me find the lost years.

Although the work is written, the author loses control over the work, and parents cannot guarantee that they will give birth to a smart son, but I am not dizzy, and I understand that what I want to create is a common student image. The positions and attitudes expressed in the times, and the choices made under pressure.I need him to be representative, to represent the part of people that exists in my understanding.While representing others is itself a form of tyranny, groups that are not represented will be even more frustrated.

This means that he is not idealized enough, maybe using the popular word now is called obscenity, he is full of loopholes, and makes mistakes again and again, in him, maybe the brilliance of human nature cannot be seen, but fundamentally speaking, he can be regarded as a Good old man.As a person born in the late 80s, I understand that the times chose me and created my destiny. My growth is the best work of the times and society.

Since we are young people, youth is an unavoidable topic. In my eyes, youth may not be the kind of pretentious gesture, boundless sorrow.More often, youth is a flawless body that is being eroded by filth.And in the twilight of youth, there is almost only filth left.Maybe the youth at dusk is an embarrassing taste, the illusion of youthful beauty is more tasteless, and the endless self-warning that requires sobriety is by no means a proud thing.

Since it is youth, there will be love. I like beautiful love, but the love I write is not beautiful at all, maybe it is rough and cruel, like a landscape picture that has not been modified by photo editing software.The serious separation and reunion is tiresome.

Edgar Allan Poe once said: "The death of a beautiful woman is undoubtedly the most poetic subject in the world." But now in a civilized society, death for no reason is hard to inspire people's nerves. I have no right to life or death over characters. They will not be given a chance to die.

After all, the work has become the past, and what I say here is not credible, but at this moment I can't get the consent from the past, so I have to do it for me.I dedicate this work to my long-lost memory, a time of insignificance.

【Wang Xuepu】

2009.8.17
(End of this chapter)

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