Time carved for no reason

Chapter 32 Chapter Seven (5)
"That's it. If you don't give up your seat, you will have a sense of guilt. If you give up your seat, the guilt will be gone. Instead, it will become a kind of satisfaction. Giving up your seat is never the purpose. It can also be said that doing good deeds It has never been an end, but only a means. The real purpose is something else. As Li Zongwu said, people are frightened when they see others falling into the water, not because they lament the death of others, but because they feel sorry for themselves because of the death of others. It’s the same with doing good deeds, when you see others in trouble, you think of yourself out of fear, and when you help others, you actually help yourself.”

Xueqian had nothing to say, unwilling to admit defeat in front of Qian Siyao: "I don't even understand what you said, but you probably mean that there are no good people anymore, we are all not good people, we are all selfish guys , I think you must have suffered some kind of injury before to see people so badly."

Xu Yao retorted seriously, and in a hurry, sprayed his saliva on the fish, and said loudly: "You are attacking personally, it's okay if you disagree, don't make wild guesses, you were poisoned too deeply by the designated reading materials when you were young, our textbooks tell you Our things are what our society tells us to oppose. The truth in books has been overturned time and time again, Chinese students have worked hard, ideals have been established time and time again, and have been destroyed time and time again.”

The fat girl also interjected: "I agree with that." Because of losing weight, she fantasized again and again, failed again and again, and suddenly had this intention.

Everyone was silent, Xu Yao saw that the scene was cold, and knew that this was not pleasant. Although he was used to being casual, he didn't like to do things that were in the limelight, so he said: "I don't say whether people are good or not. Bad, in fact, there is no distinction between good and bad, but we always have an impression that what is good and what is bad, why do we have to analyze it this way? Many times, when encountering injustice, we always ask 'why? I haven’t done anything bad, why is my luck so bad? God treats me so unfairly’? Isn’t this asking for trouble? There are many things, just open it up if you want to, and put a red veil on the ugly girl, isn’t that girl Isn't it ugly? When you take off this mask one day, wouldn't it scare you to death?

Therefore, there is neither good nor bad. With this point of view, you will not feel uncomfortable when you encounter anything. Great men have to shit in the toilet, and philosophers and wives have to talk vulgar love words.

Concept and reality are always two different things. Isn't there a joke about a matchmaker making a match for a poor man, and the poor man asks: "How about the bride's breasts?" ’ The matchmaker replied:
'Like a bun. The poor man then married his daughter, and exclaimed that night when he entered the bridal chamber: "Wang Zai, little mantou!" '"

Xu Yao's well-timed joke resolved the embarrassment of the audience, everyone was rocking with laughter, Liu Xiaoqin laughed and said, "Damn it, it's disgusting, why do you say such things in front of us girls. "

Xueqian made up his mind that Liu Xiaoqin was a bitch, and thought Liu Xiaoqin's words were funny.I can't wait to say: "You still feel disgusted? You don't know how many times you have heard such words." I still hold back at the moment, men are always born with contempt for bitches that don't belong to them.

Qian Siyao also smiled and said: "Xie Tan, your classmate is really interesting, don't you study philosophy?
Or do all your Chinese students speak like this? "

Xu Yao saw that the beautiful woman asked about him, and without waiting for Xie Ting to reply, he said, "I don't study philosophy, I study Chinese, of course, I study by myself."

Seeing Xu Yao's attentiveness, Xie Tan was unhappy and said, "People didn't ask you why you are so attentive. Really, don't think that your fallacious and heresy can fool us girls, it's too naive. Qian Siyao, don't treat our Chinese boys as We all want to be like this, but we Xueqian are not."

Qian Siyao's eyes lightly covered Xueqian, and he smiled generously and said, "Of course I know Xueqian is not a bad person, but this student who is quite 'philosophical' is not a bad person. Who do you think is a bad person in your heart? You can still say it, you." The word "ah" dragged on for several seconds, but the aftertaste still lingered.

Xie Tan blushed and waved his hands: "Okay, you are mocking me." After saying that, he wanted to tickle Qian Siyao, Xu Yao couldn't argue with it, so he had to keep picking up vegetables, and Xueqian couldn't see Xie Tan and Qian Siyao fighting. , hurriedly helped Qian Siyao and said: "Qian Siyao didn't say anything, why are you in a hurry? Is there something wrong, it hits the mark."

Qian Siyao was scratched to tears, and after hearing this, she grabbed the ladder and quickly said, "Yes, yes, I didn't say anything." Xie Tan didn't listen to her questioning, but scratched harder until Qian Siyao Yao shouted weakly: "Good sister, I was wrong, I will not say anything."

Seeing that Xueqian was helping Qian Siyao to speak, Master Hu decided that Xueqian wanted to gain favor, and asked the waiter to bring over liquor, but Qian Siyao stopped him and said, "You said you had a headache yesterday, why do you want to drink?" Master Hu tenderly With a smile, he said softly: "It's okay, just drink a little." This love story is standard, and the people around only listened to it, and they all saw the two of them talking affectionately, and no one could listen to what they said.

When the atmosphere came, everyone present made jokes about the two of them together. Xie Tan was the first to make noise because Xueqian didn't speak for her just now.Master Hu looked embarrassed, feeling very happy, and didn't make any excuses. Qian Siyao was also embarrassed, and quickly argued: "It's just brothers and sisters, classmate. It's not what you think." The more she argued, the more troubled everyone was. incredible.

Laughing to the climax naturally stopped, followed by a long silence, Master Hu thought the opportunity came, opened the wine, stood up, took Xueqian's cup across the table, Xueqian hurriedly stopped: "I have a bad stomach, I can't drink, I'll drink, okay?"

Master Hu smiled contemptuously, as if he was willing to admit that Xueqian was joking, and said:

"This buddy is really joking. There are no boys who drink drinks. Drinking drinks is the monopoly of girls. If you don't believe me, ask this philosopher brother."

Xu Yao didn't want to drink alcohol at all, and was about to decline. After hearing this, he had to reply: "Of course, how can there be anyone who doesn't drink alcohol? Xueqian, besides, we are Chinese. They were never inseparable."

After hearing this, Xie Tan was unconvinced and said, "I don't agree with what you said. Poetry and drinking have never mattered to us women."

Afraid of arguing with her, Xu Yao quickly apologized and said with a smile: "I forgot that there is a female poet here, so I take back what I said."

Master Hu had already poured wine for Xueqian, knocked his glass on the table, clinking the glasses, and said: "Have a drink first, I'm still shy now, this wine won't be enough later, come on, Let's do it."

Xueqian restrained himself to drink half of his glass, already feeling dizzy and the camera was shaking, Xie Tan felt sorry for the money for the drink, and hurriedly persuaded Master Hu: "He's slapped on his face, look, his face is red, he really can't drink."

Master Hu poured Xueqian again, Xueqian couldn't protect the cup with his hands, and filled another cup. Master Hu said to himself while pouring the wine: "It's okay, there is no necessary relationship between facial expression and drinking capacity. He should hold at least one catty. Come on. , have another drink."

Xueqian just heard him say the word "one catty", he was anxious, he was not dizzy, and he was anxious to explain that all the wine that hadn't fully entered his stomach just now came up, and with a wow, all the filth entered his mouth In the city, blocked by a city wall made of teeth, he can't speak at the moment.The filth was still pouring up, Xueqian often brushed his teeth sideways, the gap between the teeth was wide, the yellow juice was sprayed out like water from a high-pressure water gun, Xueqian only felt bitter, and he probably spit out bile, busy Covering his mouth with his hand, Master Hu was pouring the wine just now, and he was completely unprepared. Seeing Xueqian hiccupping repeatedly, he knew that something was wrong. I was soaked enough by the yellow water before.Master Hu was still bent over, unable to move, Xueqian hiccupped again.Everyone exclaimed, "Pit in the toilet."

Xueqian woke up like a dream, and hurriedly grabbed a piece of paper.Staggered and fell into the toilet, "It's a shame, Qian Siyao is going to laugh me to death now." After throwing up, she was stunned in the toilet for a long time, and then mustered up the courage to open the door and enter the private room. Everyone was joking, as if they didn't remember what happened just now. Embarrassing things happened.

Qian Siyao was wiping Master Hu's chest.Master Hu stared at Qian Siyao affectionately.

Xueqian was jealous and quickly interrupted: "Let me come, I was really embarrassed just now, I couldn't hold back all of a sudden, I did something wrong, is it okay?"

Qian Siyao hadn't answered yet, Master Hu showed a magnanimous look of forgiving Xueqian, like forgiving his son who had accidentally done something wrong, and said with a smile: "It's okay, she just wipe it for me. If you don't feel well, just Don't move around, I shouldn't force you, it would be better if you can't drink, just sit down now, or everyone will be unsafe."

Qian Siyao got up and rushed to Xie Tun and said: "Xie Tun, let's take a step first, you continue, eat well, happy birthday. Find your Mr.right early." Xie Tun blushed and did not answer, only glanced at Xu Yao quietly , Xueqian was overwhelmed and said in surprise: "You guys don't eat? There are still a lot of dishes that haven't been served."

Qian Siyao smiled arrogantly: "It's not your turn to keep me. His clothes are dirty, and he only has a vest inside. I'm afraid he'll catch a cold. Besides, the smell is really bad. I'll accompany him first." Go back and change clothes."

"Where to change, his dormitory? Are you still coming?" Xueqian asked hurriedly.

"He doesn't live in the dormitory, so he rents a house. The dormitory in their courtyard is on the first floor. It's too trendy. He might as well rent a house. It's quieter. By the way, if you have time, call your girlfriend to come and play with me. You cook and eat. Xie Tan, let’s go first, Great Philosopher, let’s go, and I’ll listen to your discourse next time.”

Xu Yao listened to the beautiful woman greeting him, and forced himself not to watch Qian Siyao go out, in order to show his flair as a gentleman.He just waved his hand casually as farewell, but Xueqian watched Qian Siyao go out, unexpectedly Qian Siyao and Master Hu's backs had not completely disappeared, Master Hu took her hand.Xueqian thought silently: "This is an illusion, an illusion."

The next meal was so boring, everyone didn't talk, except Liu Xiaoqin came out to make a few jokes, Xie Tian saw Xueqian lost his mind, completely forgot the code words of the previous rehearsal, and was anxious to wink, but Xueqian mourned silently, I only care about my sadness and melancholy, I have forgotten all about the feast and the world.Not long after the dishes were served, Xu Yao got up and wanted to go first, but Xueqian remained silent, so Xie Tian had to give Liu Xiaoqin a hint, and Liu Xiaoqin hurriedly stopped Xu Yao and said, "Why are you going back so early? Eat more, today we will It's the party secretary's birthday, how dare you leave first? We still have to listen to your private conversation with her." Xie Tian hurriedly interrupted: "Damn, he wants to leave, let him go, don't make such jokes." Xu Yao saw the ladder and climbed up: "The party secretary said it's okay, I'll go first." After finishing speaking, he picked up his coat from the back of the chair and started to leave. Xie Tian gave Xueqian two more winks, Xueqian His sleepy eyes were filled with hysteria, and he could no longer recognize the program of the system.Xie Tan had no choice but to go out in person, stood up, and said in standard Mandarin, "Xu Yao, if there is nothing important, don't rush away, I have something to discuss with you later." Xu Yao should have something to discuss with him.

Now I have no choice but to discuss something with him, and I lose all face, it's Xueqian's good deed.

Xu Yao walked to the door with big strides, Fang stopped and said with a smile: "If there is anything important, let's talk about it later, I have something urgent."

Xie Tan persisted: "What's the rush? It's my birthday today, why don't you give me some face?"

Xu Yao smiled honestly: "My girlfriend urged me to call her back. If I don't call her back, she will lose her temper and break up with me."

After hearing this, Xie Tan was ashamed and angry, almost got up, and slapped Xu Yao twice, she wanted to be sarcastic and said: "Go back to your mother, when did you have a girlfriend, I didn't expect you to be this kind of person , bah, I lost my sight." When the words came to his lips, they became: "Well, I won't keep you, you go first, and go to your important business!"

Xu Yao understood the meaning of these words, Xueqian woke up seeing Xie Tun's loud voice, saw that Xu Yao was going to leave, and hurriedly tried to stop him, Xu Yao hurriedly said: "I really have something to do, you know my daughter-in-law's temper, As long as I don't call at night, she will die, so you take care of it first, and make an apology for me and the party secretary, okay?"

Xueqian was speechless.Xie Tan said angrily: "What are you talking about, why don't you hurry up if you have something to do?"

When Xu Yao got this sentence, he really hurried away, and ran away as soon as he went out.

There is no reason to eat vegetables to pass the time anymore. Those present are all sensible people who know that today is a mess.Xie Tan threw his chopsticks: "Don't eat, pay the bill and leave." Xueqian hurriedly apologized with a smile: "What are you doing? Don't be so angry, he just has such a temper, let's plan next time." Xie Tan couldn't bear it anymore, He jumped up, put his hands on his hips, and pointed at Xueqian with the other finger and cursed: "Plan your fart, so you have been using me all the time, don't you say that he still reads my poems at night, you think you are writing poems?" A novel? He also said that he was laughing while reading it, bah! I almost believed you, you and Xu Yao are nothing!" In fact, she completely believed it.

Xueqian argued: "What are you talking about? Did I lie to you? Is there any news that I didn't tell you?"

"Tell me, he has a girlfriend, why do you say he broke up long ago? He obviously came to humiliate me, you didn't know beforehand? I don't hate him, I hate you, you made me lose face, so much I don't want people to chase me, but I have to be fooled by him, it's all good things you did."

Xueqian also said angrily: "Stop swearing, I didn't know he had a girlfriend beforehand, besides, didn't you say you were very confident? You said you were sure he liked you, and no one would dare to rob you. Hmph, you It's a good thing to do today, Qian Siyao brought that man over, and that man even rented a house, why didn't you tell me? They're leaving, why didn't you stay?" The people present knew another meaning of the banquet , understood the deal between Xie Tuan and Xueqian, and they all let out an "oh" at the same time.

Xie Tun, with disheveled hair, pointed at Xueqian with his chopsticks, as if he wanted to absorb Xueqian's problems into the chopsticks.Cursed: "Fuck you, just like you, you still want to chase Qian Siyao, I didn't want to tell you for a long time, for fear of hurting your self-esteem, you don't even have any self-knowledge! How can you compare to other Master Hu, Today I vomited on others in public. Okay, let’s not mention this, you said you didn’t know that Xu Yao had a girlfriend, and you didn’t even know about a dormitory? I asked you to inquire about the news, and you found out that it was in the dog’s stomach?”

Xueqian was so angry that he pointed at Xie Tun, gasping for breath, unable to speak, he said cruelly:
"Okay, it's my fault. Don't ask me to help you in the future, and I won't beg you." After saying that, he turned and left, and ran downstairs almost bumping into the food passer.Couples are everywhere on the road, flirting, walking, Xueqian only feels this scene, heartbroken everywhere.I can't bear to look at it, I can't bear to experience other people's happiness, and other people's happiness has become my own pain.

Xueqian ran against the crowd, and the people on the side of the road were like street lights, all receding with time, Xueqian felt that those pedestrians were looking at him, like the past history, laughing at himself.

Thinking of this, a strong sense of shame arises spontaneously.Could it be that I am great when I look back at those pedestrians and examine the shameful past?Could it be that a person who can face shame directly can escape these shameful trials?One, Bonhoeffer, said that the shame is that we recall being naked in the Garden of Eden.

Is it possible to transcend this shame by gazing at my naked body?Those shames seemed to stay in my heart all the time. I dozed off on weekdays and harassed myself by talking in my sleep. Sometimes I woke up and entangled myself in my chest. My own embarrassment, people in the class scolding me for hooking up my second wife, all these things came, like the traffic that the highway could not carry, they kept gathering, crushing my fragile nerves.Xueqian's eyes were full of tears, his speed slowed down but he didn't want to stop, he didn't know how long he would run, maybe he had to run with a little strength, the speed made him feel that it was the only reliable and safe state, this is a fascinating speed , keep him out of the world.

(End of this chapter)