If you give me three days of light

Chapter 15 Learn to Speak
My learning to communicate with the voice began in the spring of 1890, and in fact I had a strong urge to make it very early on.I often put one hand on my throat and the other on my lips, and make some sounds.I have a strong interest in things that can make sounds.When I hear cats barking and dogs barking, I love to touch their mouths with my hands.When others are playing the piano, I will touch the keyboard with my hands; when others sing, I will touch their throats with my hands.

When I had normal hearing and vision, I had a strong ability to speak, but since I got the disease and my ears were deaf, I can't speak.I sat on my mother's lap all day, put my hands on her face, and enjoyed feeling the opening and closing of her lips.Although I have long forgotten what it is to talk, I also squirmed my lips like everyone else.My family told me that I cry and laugh as naturally as a normal person.

Occasionally, I can utter a few sounds and spell out a few words, but this is not talking to others, but involuntarily exercising my pronunciation organs.However, only the word "waten (water)" was vaguely remembered after I became ill. I often pronounced the sound "wa...wa" vaguely, and gradually I almost forgot the meaning of this word until Miss Sullivan Began to teach me, after I learned to spell this word with my fingers, I never pronounced this sound again.

I realized early on that the way the people around me communicated their ideas was very different from mine.Even before I knew that deaf people could learn to talk, I was beginning to feel dissatisfied with my communication methods.I often feel that sign language communication limits and restricts my free expression of thoughts and emotions.This feeling became more and more unbearable to me, and I desperately wanted to get rid of this bondage.I often fluttered my lips like a bird flapping its wings in anxiety, hoping that I could speak with my mouth like a normal person, but my family always tried to stop me, for fear that I would be discouraged if I didn't learn well.But I am not discouraged.After accidentally learning about Nabu Kada's deeds, I became more confident and determined to learn to speak.

Mrs. Ramsen, who had been Lola's teacher, came to visit me in 1890, fresh from her visit to Norway and Sweden.She told me that the blind and deaf girl from Norway, Nabu Kada, had learned to speak.Before she finished telling me, I was so anxious that I secretly made up my mind to learn how to speak.I begged Miss Sullivan to take me to Boston to Miss Sarah Fuller, the principal of the Horace School, and begged her to help me and teach me.However, to my surprise, this amiable, beautiful and gentle lady was willing to teach me herself.So, from March 1890, 3, I began to learn to speak from her.

When Miss Fuller taught me the pronunciation, I put my hand lightly on her face and let me feel how her tongue and lips moved.For every movement of hers, I concentrate on imitating her, and in less than an hour, I will learn the six letters m, p, a, s, t, and l.

Miss Fuller taught me these eleven lessons that I will never forget for the rest of my life.What a surprise I was when I uttered the sentence "It's warm" coherently for the first time!Although they are only a few syllables intermittently and intermittently, they are human languages ​​after all.I suddenly realized that a new power had arisen to free me from the shackles of my soul.I was like flying in the sky of knowledge with the wings of language, and gained faith.

If a child who has lost his hearing can't wait to express words he has never heard before, longing to step out of the dead silent world.Get rid of the life without love and warmth, without insects and birds, and without beautiful music, and he will never forget that when he uttered the first word, the shock of ecstasy and joy would flow through him like an electric current. whole body.Only such a man knows with what eagerness I speak to toys, stones, trees, birds, and animals that cannot speak; What joy is in my heart to understand what I have expressed.

Now, I can finally communicate with people in language, and I no longer need others to help me interpret. This kind of communication convenience cannot be expressed in words.Now I can think and talk at the same time, which was not possible with sign language before.

However, I didn't really learn to speak in this short time.I just learned some basics of speaking, and only Miss Fuller and Mrs. Sullivan could understand me, and others could barely understand a small part.After I have learned these basic languages, without the genius of Teacher Sullivan and her unremitting efforts, I am afraid that it will take several years, or even more than ten years, before I can really learn natural language and communicate with others with ease. Exchange thoughts and emotions.

In the beginning, I practiced hard all day long, but only those closest to me could understand what I meant.Later, with the help of Miss Sullivan, I repeatedly practiced the pronunciation of each character and practiced the natural combination of various pronunciations.Until now, I still have to spend a lot of time every day to correct non-standard pronunciation.

What this training means, only those who have taught deaf children to speak can really understand, and only they can appreciate the difficulties I had to overcome.I felt Miss Sullivan's lips entirely with my fingers; of the vibrations of her throat, the movements of her mouth, and the expressions of her face, I had an entirely tactile grasp, which was often inaccurate.When this happens, I force myself to practice the poorly pronounced words and sentences over and over, sometimes for hours, until I am satisfied with the sound I can make.

Practice, practice, practice, this is the task I set myself.This became a strong belief that inspired me to overcome all difficulties.I used to repeat, ecstatically, "I'm not dumb anymore".I was filled with confidence in the thought that I would be able to talk freely to my mother and understand the responses of her lips.I was ecstatic when I actually realized that it was easier to communicate with words than with signs.For this reason, I no longer use the sign language alphabet to talk to people.But Miss Sullivan and some friends still talked to me in this way.Because using sign language letters is more convenient and easy to understand than lip reading.

Here, perhaps it is necessary for me to explain the common sign language alphabet for blind and deaf people.People who don't know us seem to be a bit confused about sign language.When people read to me or talk to me, they spell out words and sentences with one hand on my hand, which is a common method used by deaf people.I put my hand lightly on the speaker's hand, so as not to interfere with the movement of his fingers and, on the other hand, to feel them easily.My feeling is the same as when people read a book, what appears in their minds is not a single letter, but a living word.The people I spoke with used their fingers in constant motion so that they could spell letters very quickly and with the same dexterity and dexterity of the fingers that a skilled typist uses on a typewriter.Of course, I often practiced spelling without knowing it, just like a normal person practices handwriting.

When I was able to communicate with people, that feeling of wanting to go home grew stronger.This important moment has finally arrived, and I am on my way home.Along the way, Miss Sullivan and I kept talking with our mouths, just to seize all the time to improve our language skills, not to speak for the sake of speaking.Before we knew it, the train had pulled into the station, and our family members were standing on the platform to welcome us.When I got off the train, my mother hugged me in her arms, trembling all over, listening excitedly to every word I uttered from my mouth.Little sister Mi Zhuli grabbed my hand, kissed and kissed, and jumped up and down with joy.The kind father stood aside and watched everything that happened in front of him silently, with a look of relief and joy on his face.To this day, when I think of this scene, tears well up in my eyes, as if the prophecy of Isaiah had been fulfilled in me: "The trees clap their hands for joy, and the mountains sing together!"

(End of this chapter)