A MAZE OF GREED

"Do you know what is more difficult than losing your loved ones?" Edwin asked.

Ruth shook her head, looking at his handsome face. He turned to match her gaze and said, "staying away from the ones you love!"

The intensity of his burning gaze and the genuineness of his words had Ruth gasping for more air. She felt a shiver ran down her spine as she looked into his beautiful eyes.

"But you have to endure that pain, Miss Moore. Because life and time do not stop for anyone. People come into our lives to play certain roles. Some teach us, while some punish us. But they all leave memories behind.

And that is the reason why you should not give up on your life. Their memories! After people leave this mortal world what can be the best way of paying them a tribute by cherishing their memories in your heart?".

Sucking a deep breath, Ruth tore her gaze from his. "And what about the pain? It does not let you move on. It keeps you dragging down till you fall."

She remembered how her mother's memories still got her vulnerable even after years.

Edwin paused for a minute, thinking about what should be the answer to her question, and if he was capable of giving it.

He then again turned to face her. He wanted her to see that he meant no disrespect towards her for what he was about to do.

"May I show you first?" He asked sincerely.

Ruth did not know what he wanted to show, so she just nodded her head.

Her curious hazel eyes had him right where he wished to be, but it was not the right time. Controlling his feelings, he slowly lifted his hand that Ruth's eyes followed. And before she knew, he smacked her forehead.

She was shocked at his ungentlemanly behaviour. Which sane man does that to a woman?

She was about to open her mouth to reprimand him, but he smiled, and she melted in his smile right then and there, unwillingly, unknowingly.

"It hurt, did not it?"

"Yes. But why you did that?" She glared at him.

"What if it was not me and some toddler?"

"Huh?" She asked in confusion.

"What if it was not me and some toddler had smacked you on the forehead? Would you have got angry?"

Ruth shook her head still not getting what was his point he wanted to present. "No. I would not have."

"But it would have hurt the same way as it did now." Edwin pointed.

Ruth said without missing a beat. "But it was a small child. Even though it would have hurt me I would not have been angry. The child's happiness is more important than my pain."

Edwin smiled at her proudly like a teacher smiles when their student gets the right answer in the examination.

"Exactly!"

Ruth looked at him, puzzled. "I... I do not get it."

Maybe Ruth was not as smart as Edwin thought she was. But he did not mind explaining her things and answering her gazillion questions if it meant he could be close to her, and she did not mind his company.

"It is all about your perspective, Miss Moore. You got angry because it was me who hurt you. But you would not have been angry if it was a toddler. Because you prioritise the kid's happiness over your pain.

Life is just the same, Miss Moore. The pain will be always there. It will not vanish no matter what. It will haunt you for eternity. But it is your perspective that would help you navigate through life.

If you consider your pain as your weakness, it will keep you shackled, not let you free. All you have to do is prioritise your happiness over your pain. Then you will have that pain as your companion, but it will not be able to keep you shackled."

Ruth was awed at his words. She could not believe she was sharing her deepest feelings with the man she hated the most in the world. And the more shocking fact was he was there by her side to guide her, to console her when no one else was.

She fell into silence. Her mind raced back to their previous encounters. He was that obnoxious man who did not respect women or any other person in general. The man who was feared by many. He was arrogant, vainglorious, self-centred.

All those adjectives would be short to describe him. She told him on his face that he repulsed her. Then why he came to sit by her side and make her understand life in a new light?

Where did he learn those things? It felt like he had gone through similar experiences. Every word he spoke sounded coming straight from his heart.

And the most disturbing thing for Ruth was- why his words filled her heart with warmth? Why his mere presence made her feel... safe?!

"No one can ever fill his place in my heart and life again!" Ruth whispered as another tear rolled down her eyes.

She knew she should stop talking with him. She should even run away from him. But this time, not only her heart but also her mind rebelled against her.

"You are right. Some people can never be replaced in our life. But why do you want that void to be filled? Let it the way it is. Do not forget that as people leave, new people enter our life with a new role to play.

We all are just characters of the great play on this stage of the world. And the writer-" Edwin pointed at the sky. "She has everything planned in her head. We, you, me... we are not worthy enough to understand what she has dreamed of, how she wants this play to turn out.

All we can do is play our assigned roles and see how this play progresses. We have to enjoy this process, live it to the fullest."

"And what if one of us make a mistake?" Ruth thought about all the things she regretted in her life.

Edwin gave her a bright smile and said, "Why think negative before ACCEPTING the role we have to play? And even if you make a mistake, she-the creator- must have someone assigned to cover it up for you."

Ruth was overwhelmed by the emotions of his words. She had never heard anyone, especially him speaking with such genuineness and something else she could not recognise.

"You speak about the creator as if she is a female." She pointed out.

Edwin raised his one brow amusingly. "Why? Do you think it is impossible?"

Ruth was in dilemma. "I...I do not know." She said truthfully.

"I am not talking about God, Miss Moore. I am talking about the creator. Just like a woman gives birth to a new life why it is not possible that we all creatures are the creation of a female creator?"

Every word that Edwin said left Ruth amazed and mulling over it. She had not expected that level of maturity and wholesome understanding of life from him of all people. That man was a chest full of mysteries.

"I... I do not know if it right or not, but I like this idea." She told him honestly.

Ruth again turned to look at the ground before her. "He was a great man, you know?!"

Edwin nodded his head even though Ruth was not looking at him. "I am sure he was if you are this broken by his departure."

The silence that prevailed afterwards was surprisingly comfortable. It was because Ruth was not in a state and mood to fight with the man or if it was because he was not the same man she hated, whatever the reason was, Ruth found comfort in his presence, and that was all she needed at that time.

"Close your eyes." He said suddenly. His tone was not demanding contrary to his personality, but it sounded almost like a humble request.

"Why?"

"You ask too many questions, Miss Moore."

His comment made her shut up for a while, and she did as she was told.

"Now recall your every moment, every memory with Mr Payne. The days when you laughed together, the days when you cried together. The sunrises of hopes and the sunsets of sadness- remember everything."

Edwin's words were hypnotic to her ears, doing wonders with her restless mind. He did not need to try more as everything he told her to recall was fresh in her mind.

Her shoulders shook as she cried, but somewhere she was aware of Edwin's presence beside her. She came to this place because she did not want to expose her vulnerability to the world.

And now she was scratching the surface of her in front of Edwin O'Dell, willingly. How ironic!

"Cry as much as you want Miss Moore. Do not hinder your flow of emotions. Let it all out till there remains nothing but peace inside you. A peace that comes after accepting the reality."

Tears flowed in waves from Ruth'sclosed eyes. The pain that she felt but tried to control came crashing down heavily on her.

"Forget about me and let it all out, Miss Moore. You deserve that peace. You deserve everything best in life!"

His sincere words broke Ruth's dam of restraints, and she broke down, grieving with her every being. Edwin sat there in silence, watching her mourning over the loss of a fatherly figure from her life.

His mind wandered back to his past. Only if he had someone for him to say the things he had said to her. Alas!