A Wave Of Desire

~~

Ocean

~~

I couldn't believe what Ben and Ryan were telling us. They had both gone home and were promptly kicked out of their houses just for being together. That was fucking stupid as well. I didn't know what to think about that. It made so many fears and worries surface, ones that I didn't even know that I had.

Makai and I did what we usually did when we had company, which wasn't often and was almost always Ben and Ryan. We took them to the living room where we sat and faced each other.

This was completely different to how we were on Monday. The day that Ryan had been shocked to find out that Ben was in love with him. That day, I had sat by Ben to offer support and Makai had sat near Ryan, as if he was going to keep him in place or something. Hell, it was even different than yesterday, when Ryan came back to tell Ben that he loved him too.

Today, Makai and I sat on the couch, sitting so close that our shoulders touched. Ben and Ryan were sitting opposite of us, on the love seat, close enough that they were touching as well. Not to mention that, when Ryan saw that Makai put his arm around my shoulder to hold me closer, Ryan copied him and put his arm around Ben.

He was copying Makai's moves. Well, that was a little awkward but also flattering. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery after all. Not to mention that there were worse people that he could have been imitating. I guess that everything was going to work out just fine for the two of them if Ryan was using Makai as a role model.

"I still don't think I understand what happened." I told them as I tried to wrap my head around it all. "Why did your parents kick you out?"

"Well, for me, my dad screamed at me saying something along the lines of 'Are you fucking telling me that I raised a fucking queer? What the hell is the matter with you, boy? I will not let you date that boy. Hell, you will be lucky if you ever see him, or anyone. I swear to God I will beat your ass for this." I heard the anger and hatred in his voice. That made no sense to me. Ryan had always loved his dad, no matter what. But now he hated him. Now he had been kicked out of his house and his family didn't want him. That was fucked up.

"I can't believe that your dad would say that to you." Makai was shaking his head in disbelief. "I just can't fathom it. I know that not everyone is the same, but my parents took it very well. When I told them that I was bi-sexual they didn't care. They just wanted me to be happy."

"Yeah, well, my dad is just closed minded and stupid. I guess that is all that there is to say about it." Ryan just shrugged his shoulders like he didn't care, but I could see the pain in his eyes when he spoke.

"Ben, was it the same for you?" I asked him, not able to stop myself from asking the question.

"Pretty much." He looked miserable. I could understand that, though. Ben had always been super close to his mom. She was such a sweet woman and I thought that if anyone's parents would accept them it would have been Ben's mom.

"What did she say?" Makai asked, probably feeling the same as me. If Ben were to get this all off his chest, telling us so that he wasn't bottling it all in, he would probably feel better.

"W..w..well, sh..she uhm, she told me that I was an abomination. She said that if I wanted to be gay then I had to leave. She said that I was committing sins and that I deserved to burn in hell for what I was doing. I was told that if I stayed at the house, I would be forced to go to gay correction therapy or something like that. She told me to break up with Ryan and to never see him again. I tried to tell her that it wasn't that bad, I just loved a man instead of a woman. That, whether I was with Ryan or not, I would still be gay. I am not attracted to women. That just infuriated her more."

Ben paused for a moment to take a breath. I could see his face was simultaneously red and pale. There was a flush in each cheek from the embarrassment and from him rubbing the tears away from his face, but underneath those red cheeks, there was nothing but a white, almost ghost-like face. He had been through so much.

"Ben, you don't have to go home. You can stay here. You both can. We're friends and we've been supporting each other all along. Why would we stop supporting each other now?" I smiled at him, trying to offer some semblance of support and relief to him.

"Thanks, Ocean." He grimaced at that, but I think he was actually trying to smile at me instead. "What are we going to do, though?"

I could see that Ben was doing his best to keep his emotions in check. He was trying to hold himself together during this hard time.

"What are you talking about, Ben?" Ryan asked him with confusion in his eyes.

"Where are we going to go? What are we going to do?" Ben elaborated for him.

"You're going to stay here." Makai reassured him. "You don't have to worry about staying out on the streets or anything. You're welcome to call our place home for the time being."

"OK, but what about after that? What about college? What about food? What about everything that we need?"

"I have my inheritance." Ryan spoke up, holding Ben tightly.

"You're supposed to use that for college. You can't use that now." Ben was still about to cry.

"Don't worry about that. Just like you, I have scholarships. I was supposed to use my inheritance for the stuff that the scholarships didn't cover. I don't need that money for school. I am good. I will use it to take care of us."

"NO!" Ben balked at Ryan's words, clearly taken aback by it.

"It's fine. I want to do this. I want to take care of you, of us." I could see the loving look in Ryan's eyes when he explained this to Ben.

"Why?" Ben looked so lost as he asked that question. I know that he was the one that wanted this relationship at first, but he was weary and would not take anything in it for granted.

"I want to. Because I love you, and I want us to be together."

We spent a little while longer talking about what it was that we were all going to do for right now. Both Ben and Ryan were staying with us, at mine and Makai's insistence. Ryan would help with groceries, and Ben would give Ryan some money back from his paychecks. I knew that this was all just a ruse. Makai probably wouldn't take a penny from them. He would instead insist on them saving for when we all go off to college. 

After all of that was settled, I thought that we would call it a day, have a late dinner, then go to bed. Nope. That wasn't it, apparently. Makai seemed to have something else to say.

"OK. I am actually glad you two are staying here, I don't want you struggling anywhere else or anything like that. However, I do have some rules." The three of us looked at Makai like he was crazy when we heard him start to speak.

"What rules?" I couldn't think of what he was going to say.

"For starters, your room will be on the opposite side of the house from us. We all need our privacy. No walking into our room without knocking. Send a courtesy text or call before coming home sooner than planned."

OH GOD! All of Makai's rules were basically telling them to let us have sex in peace. I could smack the shit out of him for that. This was so fucking embarrassing.

"In return," Makai continued, "we will give you your privacy and offer up the same courtesies to the two of you." There was such a peaceful look on my boyfriend's face that I was sure he didn't understand what it was that he was saying. This was insane.

"No problem. I am sure that we are going to want our privacy as well." Ryan's grin was a perfect copy of Makai's as he pulled Ben in close to his side.

"What the hell? What are you saying?" Ben asked him with shock in his voice and fear in his eyes.

"Just that, eventually, we are going to want to take things further, right babe? Come on, you know I'm right."

That was the point when Ben looked at me with wide eyes. We were both sitting here, stuck to the side of the man that we supposedly loved. And I know that we were both thinking the same thing. Or similar things at least. We were probably both saying to ourselves that these two idiots were too much alike in all the wrong ways. I don't think that we should have them living under the same roof.

Too late for those thoughts though, it was already a done deal.. SHIT! I have a feeling that Makai is going to embarrass the shit out of me.