A Wave Of Desire

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Ocean

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I didn't know how to process the entire situation. I didn't know what to think about Makai and him saving me. And I definitely didn't want to think about what any of this really meant, if it meant anything at all.

While I was lost in thought there was another knock at my door. I didn't know if I wanted more visitors but I knew I needed to stop being rude to people just because I didn't like what was going on.

"Come in." I called out once again.

I felt a smile spread across my face when I saw who was at the door. I felt like I was forgetting the pain that was still aching in my head. Not to mention the aching gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was all going away.

"Brittney." I knew she loved me. I knew she wasn't going to abandon me.

"Hey Ocean." She waved a little when she came in. "So, you got sick and almost killed yourself, huh?" Her words weren't exactly nice but she was here. She hadn't abandoned me.

"Yeah, I wasn't feeling that great so I had been getting weaker and weaker. I guess it finally got to me and caused me to fall at the pool. Thank God it didn't happen during the meet, right. That would have been really embarrassing." I was rubbing the back of my head, the embarrassment at the thought spreading through me.

"I think what happened should be plenty embarrassing. I mean, the whole school is going to find out. And everyone is going to think you were drinking before the swim meet."

"That's bullshit. I would never drink before a meet." I was pissed off, why would anyone think that?

"Yeah, well, it does look pretty suspicious. I can't have that crap following me around at all."

"What are you saying?" I felt a sinking in the center of my body. I think it was a combination of my heart sinking and my stomach falling. Maybe my heart fell so hard it made my stomach fall with it. I think I know where her words were heading but I hope that I am wrong.

"You know where I am heading with this Ocean. It's the reason why we were together to begin with."

"Brittney, no. You can't do this to me. I am going to get my number one spot back. I am still the best swimmer, you will see. I just need to get better and I will swim faster than Makai. I know that I will."

"You're just grasping at thin air, Ocean. You can never beat him. And if you're not the best then we can't be together. That's just how it is."

"That's bullshit." I screamed at her. "You know I am the best in the whole school. I am the best swimmer this school has ever had. I will prove that to you."

"You had your chance, Ocean. You had everything and you blew it. I am moving on." There was no love or remorse in her voice.

"Let me guess, you're going after Makai now, huh?" I already knew the answer but I had to ask.

"You know me, I only go for the best. He's the best so he is the only one worthy of me." I felt like her words were spurs in my back that were helping to push me past that point that I really didn't want to cross.

"What you are is a shallow bitch." I said the words that everyone had told me when I first got with her. I had seen the signs. I had known it was the truth. But I never thought someone would beat me so I didn't think that I was in any danger. I guess I was wrong.

"Do you really think you're the first one to call me that? Well you're not. I won't settle for anything but number one. All you are is second best. If it isn't first then it might as well be last because a loss is a loss. Remember that Ocean." With that she turned toward the door and left.

I felt the rage boiling inside of me. This was bullshit. I was just about to sleep with her. We were to that point. She had promised me that she was going to sleep with me on my birthday and I fucking missed it. I was never going to lose my virginity now and it was all her fault.

That bitch.

My parents came back into the room not ten seconds after Brittney left. It was easy to tell from their looks that they had heard my conversation but had chosen not to interrupt us. I knew what they were going to say before they said it as well.

"We knew that she was trouble, son."

"Don't let it bother you, baby."

"She's no good for you. You need to go and find someone who really loves you, someone who cares about you and wants to be with you."

"You will find someone so much better than her, sweety. She's not worth your tears."

It wasn't until mom said those words that I realized I was actually crying. This was literally the worst day of my life so far. I just wanted to go to sleep and wake up to a better day.

I was going to close my eyes, think happy thoughts, dream good dreams, and wake up to a brighter future. Maybe things would be better without having that soul sucking hell bitch running me around like a mad man. I had given her too much of my time with just the thought of getting her into bed. That was stupid. I needed to be smarter than that. I needed to focus on myself. I was going to put my all into swimming and prove that I was the best.

Brittney could go to hell, I didn't care about her anymore anyway.