Abyss Express

At the end of the small east gate. When Xueming returned to Zhizhapu, he went in and asked the two girls to wait outside.

When he entered the main room, he happened to see Mr. Chen busy in front of the shrine—the fake foreign devil was stepping on a four-legged ladder, changing the plaques of the welcome couplets.

Xueming said hello: "Mr. Chen! I'm back, do you want my help?"

The blond fortune teller responded with a smile: "Okay, hand me the plaque and give me a hand."

Wait for Xueming to help Mr. Chen replace the old couplets and add new ones.

The couplet was written yesterday.

"But don't ask ghosts and gods if you do good deeds"

"You are ashamed that you dare to enter my door"

The horizontal batch is called "count a piece of money"

The three plaques were replaced and placed next to the curtain in the back room.

Xueming asked curiously: "Mr. Chen, what do you mean by this couplet?"

Mr. Chen slowly climbed down from the four-corner ladder, and muttered to Xueming: "Avoid trouble."

Xue Ming wondered, "What trouble are you hiding from?"

Mr. Chen patted the plaster on his hands, cleaned the black cloth long gown, pointed to the replaced plaque and said in detail: "It's not fortune, talk about science and break superstition."

It's so strange that these words came out of the mouth of the owner of the paper shop.

Mr. Chen squatted next to the replaced plaque, took out a rag and wiped it for a while, pointed to the couplet and explained: "You have done a good thing, why bother to be suspicious. If you do something wrong, I can't help you—that's what it means , it counts.”

Xueming looked at the newly replaced plaque again.

The first couplet is called: "Thank you mother for the simple tea and light food, and you will never forget your heart"

The second couplet is called: "Kneel to thank father for his fists, feet and sticks, which are unforgettable"

The horizontal batch shouted: "The child is not filial!"

The exclamation point was specially painted with gold paint, which was full of irony.

"This..." Xue Ming felt like he couldn't laugh or cry: "Write it to me?"

"Ah, yes, yes, yes!" Mr. Chen fiddled with his sunglasses, his pair of blue eyes showed a playful and cunning meaning: "It's not just for you, today Friday, parents in the county and urban areas pick up their children from school, and they have something to do If you have nothing to do, come here and ask about the future of the child, and the things you ask are outrageous, so I will put this couplet on it, so that mothers and fathers can reflect on it."

Xueming only felt that both Boss Ye and Mr. Chen were wonderful people.

He put aside the affairs of his parents in Pingyang County for later, and saw that Mr. Chen was busy cleaning, dusting, waxing and gilding statues of gods, and he couldn't rest for a moment.

Xue Ming asked again: "Do you change couplets every day?"

"That's right." Mr. Chen had time to reply, casually: "Now you create an INS or Weibo account, go to Twitter for business, and post updates every day, right? I just wrote this post on the couplet, dedicated There are Internet celebrities coming to make videos, otherwise how can I make money? I want to kill those fake gods who are only cheating and abducting!"

"Then..." Xue Ming thought of the bag of paper money: "Mr. Chen means that everything in your store is effective?"

"Don't—" the fake foreign devil curled his lips again, looking frightened: "—don't say that, you can't become a master after the founding of the People's Republic of China, I just don't engage in fraudulent business, but I don't say I'm effective! I don't It’s not efficacious at all, it’s not miraculous, the sky is bright and the sun is bright, what the hell is there!”

When Mr. Chen was free, he finally sat in front of the cashier in the main room.

Xueming hasn't asked anything yet.

Mr. Chen has already taken the lead, and brought the account book to start a small calculation.

"Two bags of banknotes, a total of twelve yuan and eighty cents, please settle the bill, thank you."

According to the price of funeral supplies, it is really not expensive.

Xue Ming opened the mobile phone online banking honestly and paid the money.

Mr. Chen asked again: "Have you seen the second elder?"

"Well, they came to welcome me when I went home, and the conversation collapsed a few times. I was so angry that I couldn't speak. I took out the gift that my husband gave me, and they disappeared." After Xue Ming finished speaking, he asked again: "When is the sir Received the news? Did you know about it all the time? Did Big Brother Ye know about it too?"

"It's inconvenient to go into details about this." Mr. Chen took out a small notebook, as if he was taking notes: "After you took Bai Lu away, the next year old man Jiang came to the county to apply for the subsistence allowance, but he failed."

Jiang Xueming remembered that at home, his parents talked about this matter during the quarrel, and interrupted in doubt: "Why? Could it be that he can't write?"

"Signing is a big deal." Mr. Chen continued to explain: "The uncles and aunts in the township have bad eyesight. I, a foreigner who can understand Chinese, can sign for me. The problem is that there are two precious old people in your family. There are money in the account. It’s over one hundred thousand a year. It’s not a subsistence allowance household.”

Jiang Xueming was surprised: "Where did this money come from?"

"Later, the police officers investigated, and they will be severely punished." Mr. Chen scratched his head, recalling carefully: "It was found out that the two elders are human traffickers, and they have reached the age of washing their hands in the golden basin. The old business of crime is a career that adds bricks."

Jiang Xueming: "What happened next?"

"It's the small fish pond in front of your house." Mr. Chen's tone was as usual, as if he had long been indifferent to life and death, and he had seen it a lot: "The police in the morning, the funeral in the afternoon, and it's my turn to work in the first seven days. Holding the two small jars, I sent them to my forever warm home."

"That..." Jiang Xueming thought of the sentence "there are more than two hundred families in the county, and none of them recognize old man Jiang".

Like a prophet, Mr. Chen quickly replied, "It's all in one catch."

"Um"

Jiang Xueming felt a sense of loss, and also forgot Mr. Chen's entrustment and the taboo of "it's not convenient to go into details about this matter".

"Is what I saw a hallucination? Mr. Chen me."

"Ouch!" Mr. Chen raised his orchid fingers, with a serious look on his face: "You're disobedient, aren't you?"

"Sorry, I won't talk about this." Xueming thought again, Mr. Chen organized the funeral of the second elder of the Jiang family, and naturally Mr. Chen arranged for Xueming to take the two stacks of paper money for this trip home. secular gifts.

"If you're really curious, I can only say." Mr. Chen looked helplessly at the unfortunate curious child, "What you saw was hallucinations, and I happen to have medicine for hallucinations here, and I can't figure it out either." Why medicine can cure your hallucinations.

It's like we have used electricity for so long, but we still don't understand why electrons are divided into positive and negative poles, and why they can generate electric field power.

After the second old man Qi came back, he stayed in the house and refused to leave, as if he was waiting for someone. He had a very weird temper and was not good at communicating.

You come back to balance Yin and Pingyang, I think it should be possible - then let you go back with some gifts, and end this matter. "

Xueming wanted to ask a few more questions, because Xiao Qi once said that these unknown things are all spiritual disasters, and they might encounter them again in the future.

"Don't look at me with that curious baby's eyes, I have no skills, I'm just a barefoot doctor." Mr. Chen looked in a dilemma: "It's feudal superstition at a deeper level, let's stop here and talk about science. Break superstition.

I also hope that people in our line of work have an official title, don't they? Like a lactation master massage master, let's get a certificate from a spirit master Feng Shui master or something, maybe you can get a salary increase——

——In order to avoid a lot of bad things operating without a license, bluffing and deceiving people and families all day long. "

"Thank you." Xue Ming bowed solemnly.

Xiaoqi outside the door waited for a long time, a little impatient, kept looking inside.

When she heard the fake foreign devil speak clearly and logically, she felt an itch in her heart, and suddenly stepped into the door.

"Sir! Is it fortune-telling?"

Both Xue Ming and Mr. Chen were stunned, looking at Seventh Brother in unison.

Mr. Chen turned his head to ask Xueming, and asked in a low voice, "Is this your wife?"

Xueming turned to Mr. Chen, and whispered, "This is my servant."

"In this day and age, it's not good to hire a babysitter to mess with men and women. Xueming, you have to think about it before you talk about it—I'm familiar with this case. In the past two months, a boss said that he had killed two people at home, and the nanny was pregnant. Jump off the building.

This guy was flustered and came to ask for a peace talisman, so I turned my head and sent him to the police station. "Mr. Chen first criticized Xue Ming.

He smiled and said to the handsome young lady: "Sister, what did the servant say. What's the matter?"

"Oh!" Seventh Brother didn't care about titles at all, and explained: "I usually take care of his eating, drinking, washing, washing and cooking. If he has a pet, I have to help look after him. I will book a car, hotel and air ticket for him when he goes out. If you are unhappy, you have to take him to see a psychiatrist. You have to take care of him when you are sick and injured. You also need to keep him safe, help him deal with the enemies who come to him, and protect his mental health. Not only him, but also His sister."

Mr. Chen lowered his face and whispered to Xueming, "Isn't this your father?"

Xueming suddenly realized: "It makes sense, so it's my father."

"What's the father?" Xiao Qi became impatient, and wanted to get straight to the point, and asked Mr. Chen: "Sir, do you have a fortune teller? Do you think I have a scene with him? Let's count it for 80 yuan. If there is no play, add money That's fine, do you think my paternal love has a chance to go bad?"

"Wait a minute." Mr. Chen stood up, "show me your hand."

Xiao Qi stretched out her hands, waiting excitedly

"Want to read palms? Hey?!"

Mr. Chen lowered his head and pondered, "Well, I work frequently with quick hands and feet, unlike the young girls who are all thin and tender now, can you help me change the plaque?"

Both Xiaoqi and Xueming were taken aback, didn't they just change?

"Continue to change." Mr. Chen looked at the expressions of men and women: "Today is Friday, which is also the day when wild mandarin ducks come to seek marriage after work. The most regrettable thing about my store is that there are different customers coming and going. I can only see one dynamic. You Please do me a favor."

After all, the two followed Mr. Chen to the back room, brought out three plaques, and changed new couplets for the shrine.

The first couplet is called "It's better to find a plastic surgery team to find a man and a woman, and you will suffer from seven injuries and eight injuries.

The second couplet is called "It is better to ask the ancestral property to demolish the four rooms and five halls, hug the left and right, and have both cats and dogs"

Hengbiao "broken love, from lover to love of money"

After a while, men and women stood under the plaque of the couplet and stared in thought.

Xiao Qi clasped his hands together, and made a reverent salute to Mr. Chen, "Master, I understand."

Mr. Chen also nodded in a dignified manner, and said nonsense in a serious manner, "Although I don't know what you have realized, it must be something extraordinary. I hope the two incense masters will have a good result."

Xueming understood, and secretly smiled at the side.

Immediately afterwards, Seventh Brother made him unable to laugh.

"I'm willing to raise a dog and a cat. We don't need the money for the demolition. I don't need plastic surgery if I am good-looking. I will be happy. Thank you master!"

Waiting for Xiao Qi to jump out of the door, and talk to Bai Lu about the Zen he just comprehended.

"Sister-in-law! Let me tell you—the master in the room just now told me a very, very profound truth in couplets. In such things as falling in love, it is usually because the mentality of the two people has changed, from lovers to money, and finally Bitter fruit was born."

Xueming leaned over to Mr. Chen, and asked in a low voice: "Can the couplet be understood in this way? I thought it's better to live a life more realistically than thinking about a relationship all day long. I want people to treat themselves well. After falling in love, loving someone is still It's better to love money."

"Sometimes you have to admire these kind people." Mr. Chen said with a smile: "Your father is much more lively than you, she knows how to live, very well."

After asking about the matter, Xue Ming once again said his precious thanks. I don't know how long it will take for this parting to meet again.

Jiang Xueming went out the door and waved goodbye behind him. I am going to go back to the airport, go back to meet Ah Xing, rent a room near my sister's school, and then make other plans.

There are still many things waiting for him to do.

"Mr. Chen, I'm leaving."

Mr. Chen waved his hand with a smirk on his face, exactly the same business smirk as Jiang Xueming. "Come here often!"

Shemington paused for a moment——

——I just realized that the philistine paper-making shop owner, the ridicule hidden in his words and deeds, wanted his Jiang Xueming's dull and perfunctory attitude to be vivid and humane.

Jiang Xueming added: "Thank you."

Like a conditioned reflex, Bai Lu yelled after her brother, "Thank you, Uncle Chen!"

The three people outside the door walked further and further away.

Mr. Chen leaned against the door frame and watched the figures gradually disappear into the bustling university food street from a distance.

He went back under the plaque, on the containers on both sides, surrounded half of the heaven and half of Leiyin Temple, he raised his head and took another look at the couplet.

As if thoughtful, rubbing his chin, calm and natural.

"I didn't expect this couplet to have two meanings? Chinese is so profound!"

Like eating marrow to know the taste, he stood up and waved his fist, throwing his arms to celebrate.

"I'm a fucking genius! Oh yeah!"