After All I’m a Lolicon Really Sorry

A certain day after school last week, a classmate in my class confessed to me. And after school today, there’s also a same class classmate approaching me, the difference is that I didn’t know the former, but I know this latter.

「Classmate Kamina Eno, right now is after school, may I ask why you’re following me?」

I still have stuff to do right now, I clearly already obtained victory after engaging in the “Ramen Eating Contest” with her, logically speaking she shouldn’t have a reason to look for me anymore.

「Enter club, can’t choose.」

So that’s how it is, this prodigious bishoujo artist has got analysis paralysis, this school’s “have to enter a club” regulation is probably too cruel for her.

「So? You want to choose with me?」

「Ya.」

「Even though right now I also just so happen to be going to look for a club for this matter, why can’t you find someone else to take you to visit the clubs? I think if you had a request like this, other people would definitely welcome it a lot.」

「Don’t know who to choose, feel like it’s better to ask you.」

It’s appeared! This so-called feeling.

「This “feeling” of yours really is convenient, forget it, at any rate I’ve got to go to.」

Not long afterwards I felt deep regret over this hasty decision of mine.

Scene 1, Kyudo Club

The majority of Japanese schools have kyudo clubs, after all this is a traditional sport.

Seeing us visit, the members of the Kyudo Club were mixed with joy and worry, joy because the prodigious bishoujo Kamina Eno was interested in visiting, worried of course because I also came.

The archery field was very spacious, the seven words 「Happiness, Anger, Anxiety, Surprise, Sorrow, Fear, Thoughts」including the seven barriers to shooting were written on the crossbeam. The Kyudo Club Captain personally demonstrated for us… For Kamina Eno, taking the stance, very imposing, setting the torso, steady body, readying the bow, raising the bow, drawing apart, full draw, done in one smooth motion, release and remaining spirit. The captain who perfectly completed The Eight Stages of Shooting attracted a warm applause, but Kamina Eno clearly couldn’t see what was so amazing.

In the end she did not join the club.

Reason: Archery requires choosing arrows.

Scene 2, Track and Field Club

Just like going to the Kyudo Club, the athletic high schoolers of the Track and Field Club were also very excited about Kamina Eno’s arrival, and were also very unhappy that I also came.

The captain of the Track and Field Club was a second year senpai, since we arrived she was sticking to Kamina Eno the whole time. She would always occasionally touch her body and then release weird noises like “Ah.. So happy”.

In the end Kamina Eno also didn’t join this club.

Reason: She’s an athletics retard, and I feel like this place isn’t safe…

Scene 3, Drawing Club

The Drawing Club was the club that I felt was most suitable for Kamina Eno. She definitely should have been joining the Drawing Club, after all only here could she exert her ability.

The same as the other clubs we visited, I was still ostracized, I stood at the door of the studio watching the club members surround Kamina Eno. After arriving here Kamina Eno felt like a completely different person, after all it was drawing that was her home ground.

「The art quality here is very bad.」

After looking around for a bit, the first thing Kamina Eno said was belittling the art of this club. This instantly caused the dissatisfaction of the club members.

「Classmate Kamina, why do you say so?」

The Drawing Club captain is a very gentle looking girl, she was not angered over Kamina Eno’s disrespectful words. Kamina Eno did not explain anything, she picked up a brush from the side and started modifying an already completed painting.

I after all also have painting skills, I could tell what she wanted to do — She wanted to give life to this painting.

The “life” of a drawing is actually also called artistic conception, an artist who only possesses refined skill will not obtain the recognition of others. With her superb technique, Kamina Eno modified the line structure that was originally as rough as a draft, causing the painting to instantly have spirit. Even though this was just a sketch, the before and after differences were evident.

After seeing Kamina Eno’s technique, the club members’ eyes were all filled with admiration, they were practically begging her to join the club and the captain even directly asked her to be a student advisor.

Yet she still didn’t join the Drawing Club, after walking out of the Drawing Club I asked her why, but her words made me feel shocked.

「A slight gap will make people want to catch up, too big of a gap will make people jealous, but, being unable to even see the gap will make people stop. I will harm them by joining this club.」

From her I felt confidence, this was her confidence in her drawing skill. Maybe like she said, her level isn’t even on the same standard as those people in the Drawing Club, too big of a gap will only make people despair.

……

Afterwards we visited all kinds of clubs, but no matter what she and I still didn’t find a suitable one. I found that even the Manga Research Club I originally planned on joining wasn’t suitable for me either, because the people of that club are all consumers, the club’s main activity is reading manga after school, they do not draw manga.

At this time I notice a clubroom with a very particular name.

“God Chosen Club”

「Does this club engage in religious activities? I remember that the school doesn’t allow the establishment of clubs related to religion?」

Otherwise I would have founded the “Loli Research Club”. Kamina Eno doesn’t respond to me and directly pushes open the door. I also enter this clubroom out of curiosity, and yet the instant that I walk in the door closes.

「Welcome to the God Chosen Club!」

The tiny clubroom only has a very big table and three other people besides us. Currently it is a girl with long chestnut coloured hair who is welcoming us.

「Ah! This long pink hair! You’re that “Foreign Prodigious Bishoujo Artist” who just transferred over, right!」

This person speaking pulls out a club application out of nowhere and shoves it to Kamina Eno.

「Quick quick quick! Sign it sign it! Sign it and you’ll be able to join our club!」

「Wait a second, don’t rush first! Why do you want us to join when we just came to take a look?」

This girl looks at me with a look of disdain.

「”Us”? No, I just want this transfer student to join, I don’t plan on inviting you.」

I feel like I’m being looked down on…

「Reason? You want to force her to join without even saying what you guys’ club does?」

「Reason? The reason is that we the God Chosen Club only recruit people chosen by God, in other words, we only recruit special people. People like this transfer student classmate are the club members whom we recruit!」

So that’s what “God Chosen Club” means! How did such a nonsensical club pass review?

「Kamina Eno, do you want to join?」

I don’t really hope for her to join this strange club, so I add an enquiry in my speech. Like this she has to choose “Join” or “Don’t Join”, but her response exceeds my expectation.

「I feel like this club is not bad.」

It’s appeared again! This “feeling”! Exactly how do you feel for you to be able to feel that this club’s not bad!

「So you’re agreeing then?」

The chestnut-haired girl is very happy.

「Agree… Or don’t agree?」

The chestnut-haired girl unaware of Kamina Eno’s situation is stumped by this strange question.

「Of course it’s agree!」

Sigh! Would the average person answer like that? Isn’t answering “How should I know if you agree or don’t agree?” the norm? Why did she directly forcefully tell her to agree!

「Okay, agree, he joins together.」

Kamina Eno seems to have also additionally proposed the request of me joining, but I don’t want to join at all.

「No, our club won’t need a person like him without any special characteristics. 」

Nice rejection! Sure enough a person like me who has no distinguishing features… Sigh, let’s not talk about it.

「Characteristic? He, lolicon.」

After hearing Kamina Eno’s words the chestnut-haired girl feels surprised and then slightly looks at me.

「He’s a lolicon? What’s his name?」

「Aoba Oku.」

「Okay, he’s also a member of our club now!」

And then I head-scratchingly receive a club application form…

「Wait, what? Why do you want me to join too when I haven’t said a word?」

The chestnut-haired girl responds to me with a smile.

「Because you’re the only person in the entire school who dares to admit in front of so many people that he is a lolicon.」

「Can this also be considered “a person chosen by God”? I just know that it’s loli’s who are the angels bestowed upon humanity by God!」

「You truly are that legendary lolicon, actually able to so casually say these brainwashing words. Anyhow, you are now also a member of our God Chosen Club!」

「No, I refuse! You guys can’t drag people in so forcefully! As long as I don’t sign you guys can’t do anything.」

At this time, the other two people in the clubroom who haven’t spoken the entire time look towards me with looks of sorrow.

「I think I should introduce myself first.」

The chestnut-haired girl smiles like a little fox.

「My name is Asakusa Murasaki, captain of the God Chosen Club and at the same time also the student council president of our school.」

I finally understand exactly how this strange club passed review…

「So then… Anybody who I set my eyes on is unable to refuse becoming my club member. Even if you aren’t willing, I will help~you~become~a~member.」

Asakusa Murasaki’s words make me instantly break into cold sweat, isn’t this basically freaking abducting a peasant woman? Maybe I don’t count, but that Kamina Eno is a female.

「I just shouldn’t have come in here!」

This is my final complaint.

「Trust me, joining the God Chosen Club is your best choice.」

After watching me and Kamina Eno obediently finish filling out the club application form, Asakusa Murasaki immediately grabs them over and then starts introducing to us the other two people in the club.

「This is Amamiya Kotosuzu, she’s the girl most suited to wear a maid uniform in the entire school!」

Indeed, this girl wearing a maid uniform is very cute, if she were to go work at maid cafe she would definitely be able to become the poster girl.

「This guy over here doesn’t matter, at any rate he’s just a pervert about the same as you. He’s the person who likes collecting girls’ underwear the most in the entire school.」

「Sigh! You can actually enter the club with this kind of reason too!」

「Hello lolicon classmate, my name is Akiha Hayato, besides an interest in collecting female underwear, I also like playing the piano.」

This is a very charismatic looking boy, if you didn’t hear that his hobby is collecting female underwear…

「H… Hello」

Amamiya Kotosuzu wearing a maid uniform greets us weakly, I can basically determine that she is a girl who gets shy very easily.

「Can I ask, what does this club do?」

「Excellent question, those chosen by God all have heavy responsibility, they must maintain their best condition at all times to welcome the unknown mission.」

「So what do we do?」

「Come to the club everyday to conserve strength and store up energy.」

「……」

I knew it was impossible for this sort of club to have any sort of formal activities, after getting the exact answer I’m not disappointed either.

「Then what about academic points, there’s got be this at least.」

「The highest!」

Oh evil power… Overall since there’s academic points, moreover it’s very easy I’m not really that against it. Speaking of it, since it’s like so then can I suggest something.

「Hey… President.」

「Hm? What’s up pervert lolicon Classmate Oku?」

「…Don’t you feel tired saying such a long name?」

「Then I’ll call you Pervert, that won’t do either, it’ll be easy to mix you up with that one over there, then I call you Lo-kun.」

Pu! Exactly how did you get that answer!

「Why did you come up with this name?」

「Because calling you something like Oku-kun is honestly too disgusting, do you have an opinion?」

「No…」

I have a request to ask her, I absolutely can’t refute her right now.

「So what’s up exactly, Lo-kun?」

「It’s if I can bring my work at home to this clubroom to do, in any case this place also has a computer.」

「Work that requires a computer? Are you the president of some sort of pervert lolicon exchange meeting? Even though I don’t mind, if you’re caught by the school the influence of this sort of matter is very serious.」

「No! I just want to bring my tools like my tablet over to draw illustrations, if I’ve got to engage in club activities everyday I’ll be going home a lot later, then my working time at home every day will also be pushed back very late. 」

「I didn’t think that our club actually also has an illustrator, then I’ll allow it!」

Asakusa Murasaki seems to feel happy that I can have some more settings.

「It’s actually not just me, Kamina Eno is too, and she’s a lot better than me.」

「Is that so? So Eno is also that amazing?」

She isn’t just amazing in drawing illustrations.

「Aoba, illustrations require a long time, there’s not enough time even if you work here, right?」

Kamina Eno isn’t wrong, your average illustrator does indeed require numerous days before being able to complete one illustration, but I live off of rapid mass production.

「Anyhow this time is very important for me, I hope you guys can understand.」

The other members all don’t mind, in any case they just come everyday to waste time. And then us five people start wasting time in the clubroom.

I notice that the only person who has something to do is Amamiya Kotosuzu, she’s always busy with adding water to our empty tea cups, and she looks like she enjoys it a lot.

Truly it would definitely very fitting to send her to a maid cafe…

「Classmate Amamiya, thank you for always adding water for us, don’t you need to sit and rest for a moment?」

Hearing my words, Asakusa Murasaki and Akiha Hayato suddenly lift their heads looking at me with faces of horror, and the teapot in Amamiya Kotosuzu’s hand instantly drops. Her body shakes violently like she is suppressing her own emotions, but in the end she still fails and big teardrops fall down like a broken string.

「Sob sob sob… As I thought, does a useless person like me not even have the right to pour water for you! I’m sorry I’m sorry, it’s all my fault for being so useless, but this is the only thing that I can do!」

She’s crying louder and louder, if she keeps crying she’s probably about to attract students outside of the club to come in and check out the situation. At that time the title of the new thread on the school forum will definitely be “Pervert Lolicon Aoba Oku Molests Girl In The Same Club Causing Her To Become Defiled And Cry Bitterly”.

「That… Sorry I didn’t mean it! I was just worried about you working too hard which is why I told you to rest a bit!」

「R… Really?」

Because she’s crying, her cute tearful little face is flushed red, the word goddess is probably used to describe her.

Speaking of it, is it really okay that this child cries so easily and furthermore is also so easy to be convinced to stop crying?

「It’s true!」

「Then.. Then can I still continue pouring water for you?」

「Pour it however you want!」

A dazzling smile blossoms on her little face, Asakusa Murasaki and Akiha Hayato both give me a big thumbs up… You guys should have told me this sort of thing beforehand.