Amara – Reunion

Author's note: this is from Seraphina's point of view

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I was sitting in my bedroom with a potted iris plant in front of me. It has a bud that should bloom purple if I can't control the energy that stems from my emotions.

My vitality seeps out faster the more lifeforms are in the area and because of that, I can't practice in the sunroom or in the garden.

Also, because the practice requires me to think about Duke and our steamy moments, I prefer to do it in privacy, where others can't see me.

I wished for a measuring tool that will give me some numerical value or percentage, but Aldus said that there is no such device and that the only way to gauge my progress is to get an approximation by observing the plants.

We divided this into two parts.

The first part is to shut it down, while the second one is to use it at will and control the output.

Aldus advised me not to waste time on the second part because no one is worthy of my vitality, and I'm not sure what to think about it.

I believe that it could come in handy if I can help someone heal a serious wound or maybe even save a life, but training to do that without harming myself will probably be long and difficult and I don't have time for that now.

My immediate goal is to shut it down so that I can see Duke, and I will think about anything else later.

The full success of the first part will be achieved if I can fully relieve  a memory of me and Duke being hot and steamy and the nearby plants not reacting to it.

I'm at the point where I can sense the energy churning inside me and leaving my body, and I'm struggling to stop it. Unfortunately, there are no manuals for this as every ability is different and I'm relying on trial and error.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to empty my mind.

I could feel my heart rate increasing as Duke's smile came in front of my closed eyes. Damn, he is hot!

And there it was… his scent… the hug… the warmth… "Just a taste…", I whispered, and his smile widened. His lips on my neck and his hot palm on my waist…

'Knock, knock, knock!'

I jolted at the sharp sounds that came from outside my mind.

"Yes!?", I shouted irritably. I told them not to disturb me unless it's really-really important.

"Excuse me, Miss…", Maria said timidly. "You have a visitor."

"A visitor?", I asked while blinking myself into reality. It takes me a few seconds to stabilize my senses when someone abruptly pulls me from reliving my memories.

"Mister Lazarus is here.", Maria said.

I felt my stomach dropping. Why is he here?

We didn't talk since the event at the Council which was about a month ago and I was fine with keeping my distance from him.

Aldus told me that Lazarus and Graike assisted in investigating what happened at the Castle, and that they both expressed their will to help if needed in the future.

As much as we are convinced that someone from the Council was involved, we can't point fingers at the whole Council, and we don't know which one of them was part of the ploy. 

Councilwoman Elena promised to let us know if she finds anything suspicious.

Lazarus helped me that evening, just like many times before in the last three years, but that kiss was a pill that got stuck in my throat and spoiled everything.

No matter how I loathed doing it, I knew what I should do.

It's time to face reality.

"Show him to the living room. I will be there in a minute."

…

"Hey, princess…", Lazarus greeted me with a smile and a beautiful bouquet of roses. "These are for you. I got them from my garden."

I looked at the bouquet without moving.

Lazarus exhaled. "Listen. I know I said I will wait, and I know I messed up and crossed the line. I truly hope you are able to forgive me, and we can move on like it didn't happen. I am aware you never saw me as more than a friend and I hope I can continue being one."

My heart cracked.

Can I trust him?

Lazarus looked sincere, but what if he is just good at pretending and I can't see through him?

My plan was to tell him that we can't be more than friends and if he is not fine with it, we will stop being friends, but it seems that he got that part covered.

I had a few more things to add, "I was not well, and you took advantage of the situation. That was not fair, Laz."

"I apologize…", he said timidly and extended his arm with flowers toward me. "I know that my action destroyed the trust we built for years. I'm begging you to give me enough time to rebuild that trust bit by bit."

I smiled helplessly as I caved in, hoping that I will not regret it.

I took the flowers. "Apology accepted. Why are you here?"

"I was in the area, and I stopped by. Luca's birthday is approaching, and I thought we can discuss logistics. As the only grownup werewolf, I will come up with a plan so that they can let their wolves loose and not attract attention."

I was surprised by his words.

Yes, we talked about Lazarus being there for Luca's birthday, but after the kiss incident, I mentally wiped him off the guest list.

But Lazarus said that he wants a chance to prove himself as a friend and after accepting the apology it would not be nice to tell him that he can't come.

Besides... Luca, Zoe, and Ash know Lazarus and they are on good terms.

"That's thoughtful of you, Laz. Thank you. The property is large, and it includes a forest of more than five acres. I'm sure that will be enough for everyone to stretch their paws, and I will rely on you to make sure they stay within the property. Besides that, we will have a private beach covered with sand, so we can plan some activities there or in the water, but that would need to be in human form."

Lazarus nodded in approval. "Do you know how many people will be there?"

"I'm waiting to hear the final headcount from Luca. He will get back to me by Monday, but I don't estimate more than ten additional people, all werewolves. Mona is planning for music and food; she will join us as well. Mona is not a werewolf, but she is aware of the situation."

It will be the first time for Mona to hang out with werewolves, but she is quite excited about it. I hope she doesn't freak out and make a scene when she sees them shifting into wolf form, but so far Mona was cool about everything.

Mona is quite disappointed that since she became my familiar, other than her fast healing (which she calls useless), she doesn't feel anything different. Well, this will be different.

"Alright.", Lazarus said, and I realized that we are done syncing up about Luca's party. It was obvious that he came with the purpose to see me in person.

This could have been an email.

"So… what were you up to these days?", Lazarus broke the silence.

"Helping Aldus with research mostly."

I felt strange lying to Lazarus because in the last three years we spoke about anything and everything.

However, I couldn't tell him about my new ability, and I had no idea from where to start talking about Duke.

More than once, I wondered if I should give Lazarus a chance and see how it goes, with a thought that romantic feelings might sprout in time. But after reuniting with Duke, I was reminded what love is, and I confirmed that Lazarus will never be able to fill my heart in such a way.

Will Lazarus and I ever be able to go back to how things were?

I chided myself internally. We were never friends.

From the day Lazarus announced he will wait for me to develop an interest in him, I knew that there will be a time when he will make his move and I will not be able to reciprocate. I knew that, yet now that it happened, a sense of loss swelled within me.

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