Apollo’s Heart

Chapter 147 – The Heart Lingers (1)

Yuri looked at Tae-jun for a while, then shook her head. Her voice was deep. “I don’t want that. I don’t know how much I have to live as myself, and I don’t want to live with resentment and hatred for you. I already have so many people I have to hate. From now on, I want to stay happy and loving. Even if I forget myself.”

The woman’s firm eyes told him that there was no chance that she would love him or ever live happily with him. He could not rebut. He had no right to.

“Is that what you really wish?”

“Yes.”

“Is that and revenge all I can do for you?”

“…Yes.”

He shut his eyes tightly and struggled to breathe. After a pretty long minute of silence, he exhaled, and spoke up, “…Sure.”

Tae-jun erased any emotion that was left on his face. Then, he soon restored his cold, apathetic mien, but this time, his eyes were clinging onto Yuri desperately. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything I did to you in the name of love. I’m sorry for all the times I hurt you. I know I can’t even dare to plead for forgiveness. So, so just….”

He hesitated. The tremble was felt. The tremble from her was felt by him. Actually, from him to her. They trembled simultaneously in synchronization. The hand on her shoulder fell to the ground.

“I’ll do as you ask.”

“Thank you.”

She lifted up the corners of her lips. She looked melancholic although she was smiling for sure. Her face also looked somewhat crumbled.  “When I said I would have been glad if we met a different way, I was being honest.”

“Yuri.”

“Take care, Mr. Seo.”

Yuri turned away and walked again. This time, he could not follow. He probably would not be able to anymore… Eternally.

The sight of her trembling back would forever linger in his heart. When he closed his eyes, something dropped down. He was not sure if it was his tears or soul. His love came to an end. It was disgustingly arduous, painful, and desperately tempting.

And that… was the last.

⸙⸙⸙

There was a woman walking along the river where the light dissociated. The woman was crying. And beside her was a shadow of a motionless man.

For the past three years, the dream had always ended like that, whether it was a gloomy nightmare or a happy reminiscent dream.

Yuri slowly opened her eyes to the familiar lights and ceiling. It was Dr. Davis’s therapy room.

“Did you sleep well? You were snoring.” Dr. Davis, sitting at the desk across the counseling chair, spoke to her. “I’ve never seen someone sleep so well in that seat.”

Yuri grinned and got up from the counseling chair. “I’m sorry. I’m a bit busy because of the exhibition. I guess I was exhausted from working out this morning too.”

“Oh right, you work out these days, don’t you? What kind of exercise?”

“I do pilates every day, and swimming and jogging every other day.”

“Wow, I can’t imagine living like that. Now that you seem to have recharged, let’s begin our conversation.” He lifted up his glasses.

She fixed her posture and then her eyes on her doctor.

“How is your sleep? Do you sleep well?”

“Yeah, I fall asleep once I lie down.”

“Do you still have the same nightmare?”

“No, I don’t dream at all these days. Especially about that day.”

“Are you eating well?”

“I don’t skip any meal, and I’m trying to eat a nutritious one too.”

“I can see that.”

The once boneless Yuri had gained a lot of weight. She looked way healthier, and her face glowed. Her tall physique was now a bit muscular, and she looked more feminine than ever. Although she was not aware, there were a lot of men in the streets who tried to talk to her.

Dr. Davis continued to ask questions as he recorded her condition on the computer.  “I reduced the frequency of your medication to twice a week. How is it? Is it tolerable?”

“It wasn’t bad. It didn’t interfere with my life that much.”

“Then how about we try going medication-free for a while? Do you think you can do it?”

“I’ll try.”

“Then Yuri, I have good news for you. Your treatment is over.”

Over. The word sounded so special all of a sudden. She asked back with confusion, “Really?”

“Of course. I won’t lie about something like this.”

“I never expected this—”

“But you seem to be so excited?”

“I can’t help it. It’s pretty expensive, you know.”

At her blunt reply, Davis laughed in amusement. “I heard from Roy that you’re quite renowned these days. Collectors buy every picture you draw, and you’ve already held your own exhibition. I’m assuming that finance should not be a concern?”

“Most of my income is used to pay off my uncle’s debt from treatment. In order to move to a house with an elevator, I should try to draw more diligently.”

“Oh well… but still, if you feel somewhat off, you should come back immediately. People come to the hospital for physical pain but seem to act otherwise when it comes to mental health. In order to cure the pain of your mind, you need to take medication if needed also. Do you understand me?” Dr. Davis smiled kindly.

Yuri got up from her seat and bowed her head. “I sure will. Thank you so much for your help.”

“You did very well too. I’ll visit the exhibition with my wife. Oh, and by the way, how is Roy doing? It’s about time for him to visit me for consultation..”

“His work in California is almost done. He should be coming back tomorrow or the day after.”

“If you see him, please remind him to visit me. He’s been avoiding me for months. He rarely listens to me.”

She lightly chuckled at his complaint.