Backseat Mommy

In the car, I pondered how to have the conversation I needed to have with my husband.

The past three days had been an escape from reality... as bizarre as that sounds.

F.u.c.k.i.n.g my son over and over while my husband was oblivious to the entire thing was exhilarating and life-altering... but now I had to deal with the consequences of my reckless behavior. My actions of the past three days had awakened my s.e.x.u.a.l libido and made me realize I didn't love my husband as a husband.

Yes, he was a great man.

Yes, I loved him as a man.

I just didn't love him as a lover.

We drove in silence for fifteen minutes, as I tried to figure out what to say. Casual conversation was usually my strength, while Alex could drive for hours without saying a word other than singing a tune or asking me musical trivia. He loved asking me who sang the song that was playing. I almost never knew. He would then give me a brief history of the band. Sometimes I googled his answers and he was always right.

But casual conversation was far from what was needed here. It was obvious, at least to me, that the divide in our marriage was right here... within the open space between our seats.

To my astonishment, it was Alex who spoke up out of nowhere and broached the subject I'd had no idea he was even aware of: "So how long have you been f.u.c.k.i.n.g our son?"

I felt my face pale as it only took moments for me to absorb that he knew.

How long had he known?

"A week, a month, a year?" he listed as he drove. He didn't look at me. Oddly, his tone didn't include anger or shock, just interest.

"Just during this trip," I admitted.

What a tough question! The answer was obviously yes. But admitting the truth could hurt him even more than I already had. Yet I couldn't lie to him, he deserved the truth. "Yes, I did."

"And is that why you don't want to do everything we've been planning for the past eight months?" he continued.

"Yes, it is," I again admitted.

"And now what?"

"The truth?"

He looked at me for the first time, with an ironic glint in his eye. "No, keep lying to me."

There it finally was, in his tone and in his eyes... the hurt I had caused him.

"I'm sorry, Alex," I said instead.

"For what?" he asked. "F.u.c.k.i.n.g our son in the back seat or f.u.c.k.i.n.g our son in the bed right next to me?"

Yet I tried to explain. "I have no idea how it happened. But once it did, it awakened a side of me I've always kept under wraps. And after that, I couldn't control myself."

He sighed.

The gap between us widened.

"Have you ever cheated on me before?" he asked after a long silence.

"No," I answered. "I never even considered cheating; wasn't ever tempted."

Again silence.

Then he sighed.

More silence.

Then he surprised me by offering, "I'm sorry, too."

"I did. I've been cheating on you for a long time," he confessed.

"What?" I asked, shocked.

"I've been lying to you and to myself for years," he continued.

"With whom?" I asked, suddenly jealous even though I'd cheated too... with my own son, which was far worse than anything he could have done, unless he'd slept with our daughter Karen.

"With Gary," he revealed.

"Gary," I repeated, stunned, hearing the name, but not making a connection with who he meant. Gary, Gary, Gary...? Then as realization hit, I stammered, "D-d-do you mean your partner Gary?"

"Yeah," he nodded, looking deadpan straight ahead at the open road.

"You're gay?" I asked, my head spinning with incomprehension, unable to absorb where this was going even though the answer was obvious. The person he'd named was a male.

"Yes," he admitted, falling into one-word answers.

He laughed. "I've wanted to tell you for a long time, but I couldn't get up the courage. I also didn't want to shatter our family."

"Well, I may have beat you to that," I replied.

"But with Karen overseas traveling and our son starting college, plus the fact that my wife is f.u.c.k.i.n.g him, I figured it was high time to tell you the truth," he explained.

"We've both been living lies," I summarized. "I've always wanted you to be more forceful and more dominant."

He chuckled, "And I wanted the same thing from you. With Gary, I'm the bottom."

"Of course, you are," I smiled, that making complete sense once I looked back on our s.e.x.u.a.l history together.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he retorted, offended for the first time during this surreal conversation about betrayals and noncommunication.

"I didn't mean that rudely. I'm a die-hard submissive myself, which explains why we always struggled so hard to find any heat in the bedroom," I explained.

"So you wanted me to f.u.c.k you so hard you saw stars, while I'd rather get f.u.c.k.e.d than do the f.u.c.k.i.n.g," he pointed out bluntly, trying to slant it as a joke.

"Man, a conversation like this early on could have saved a lot of years for both of us," I laughed, trying to imagine his taking it up the a.s.s.

"It didn't stop me," he joked.

"Well, we do have one thing in common," I smiled, shaking my head... even now, it was just sinking in that he'd been cheating on me for years. This would have offended me greatly a couple of weeks ago... but now it just released me from the guilt that had been curdling inside me for the last few days.

"What is that?"

"We each love a c.o.c.k up our a.s.s," I said crudely with a wicked smile... sharing that dirty little secret with each other was helping us both to release some of our guilt, and adding in the fact that he wasn't judging me for my i.n.c.e.s.tuous transgressions was liberating me... was liberating us.

He laughed, "That we do. Each of us also loves s.u.c.k.i.n.g c.o.c.k."

I agreed, "If you say so, it must be true. Although I can't fathom you s.u.c.k.i.n.g d.i.c.k."

"I'm pretty good at it," he said.

"Me too," I countered.

Then it hit me. Was I the one who turned him gay? I asked with a hint of urgency, "When did you realize you liked d.i.c.k?"

"It started with online p.o.r.n and then a trip with Gary that took us to an all-male sauna and ended with my s.u.c.k.i.n.g his c.o.c.k," he answered.

"So I didn't turn you gay?" I asked timidly. That would be tough to handle.

He laughed. "God, no. You're the one who kept me thinking I was straight a lot longer."

"Thank God," I sighed, ironically happy that my husband was gay and it wasn't because of me. I then joked, "So you've been faking it all this time?"

"No," he said, seriously. "I still enjoy s.e.x with you, especially oral s.e.x, but I enjoy getting f.u.c.k.e.d even more."

"I still enjoy s.e.x with you, too," I agreed.

"So, what now?" he asked.

"I don't know," I admitted. I felt we were making some headway through this morass, and I was almost deliriously grateful we were having a frank, amicable discussion rather than arguing and hurling insults at each other, but I was even more confused now than I'd been before we began this conversation.

"Do you plan to keep f.u.c.k.i.n.g our son?" He asked.

"I don't know," I repeated, the generic noncommittal answer. My body screamed yes, my brain said maybe.

"If you want to, I'm okay with it," he offered, surprising me again.

"What? Really?" I asked.

"Yeah," he nodded, "he can give you what I can't. I know that's a stock cuckold quote, but it's what I feel. We may be married, but I don't own you."

"But it's i.n.c.e.s.t," I pointed out. "When I'm in my right mind I feel bad about that; or at least I think it's my right mind."

He paused for a long moment. Gathering his courage? "Want to know another shocking secret?" he finally asked me.

"More shocking than learning you're a talented c.o.c.k sucker and love taking it in the ass?" I asked bluntly.

"Believe it or not... yes," he nodded.

"This I'm dying to hear," I said, curious as hell... but also a bit nervous.

"I lost my v.i.r.g.i.n.i.t.y to Katherine," he revealed, "In both her p.u.s.s.y and her a.s.s."

My eyes went big.

My mouth dropped open.

"Your older sister Katherine?" I asked.

"Yep," he nodded.

"You've stuck it up the a.s.s of your sister?" I rephrased my question incredulously. This seemed even less fathomable than his being gay or my committing i.n.c.e.s.t.

"The one and only," he nodded.

"Your condescending sister with a stick up her b.u.t.t who treats me like a whore?" I pressed, at a loss even to picture such a thing.

"She used to be a lot wilder," he explained.

"So it seems," I said, still trying to envision a time when my bitch of a sister-in-law had been a skank. That said, it did make me kind of happy. "So that's why you didn't freak out when you figured out I was f.u.c.k.i.n.g our son?"

"I was shocked at first. But it made me remember losing my v.i.r.g.i.n.i.t.y to my sister at the lake, and how i.n.c.e.s.t had brought my sister and me closer for a while and, well," he shrugged, "I figured he might be giving you some things that I never could. I caught sight of you two from a distance a couple of times on this trip and your body languages looked like he was bossing you around and you were pretty happy about it."

"Oh," I said. So all this time while I'd been telling myself how oblivious he was, he was standing aside so I could be happy. What a guy!

"So I owe you a huge thank you for giving me some freedom!"

"If you like; I just wanted you to be happy. Plus, I realized that you and I are the same thing as each other."

"S.l.u.ts?" I joked.

"Well, f.u.c.k.i.n.g our son in the back seat of the car while your husband drives is pretty s.l.u.tty," he joked back.

"So is taking it in the a.s.s in a public washroom," I added.

"But so is taking it in the a.s.s at a company picnic while your wife is right outside the rest room visiting with the other wives," he countered.

"Okay, so we are both s.l.u.ts," I concluded.

"And yet, we've now both discovered what we are and what we want:" he continued, "to be s.e.x.u.a.lly liberated."

"From society's standards?" I questioned.

"Yes, gay s.e.x is far more common than people think, and so is i.n.c.e.s.t," he added.

"Is it?"

"Sure," he nodded, "it's just the one taboo still never talked about, although one day that might change. Christ, even transgender people are out and popular since the Caitlyn Jenner thing. I.n.c.e.s.t really is the only taboo left."

I added, "Maybe we need the Kardashians to announce they eat each other's cunts."

"That would make a great episode," he laughed.

"It can be one of those very special episodes," I joked.

He laughed again as he pulled into the hotel parking lot.

Our marriage was over, and here we were getting along together better than we'd done in years. Go figure!

We decided we would spend one more week together. He f.u.c.k.e.d me one last time. We went together to a s.e.x shop, bought a strap-on and I f.u.c.k.e.d him with it... twice... a special treat for him that had suddenly popped into my head after learning he liked it in the a.s.s. We still loved each other in our own way and we were still married, although we knew we didn't want to remain so much longer, so why shouldn't we end our s.e.x.u.a.l relationship on a high note?

I kept the strap-on in case I ever got to use it again... enjoying the power that comes from being the one wearing the c.o.c.k... in essence giving rather than receiving.

We separated with no regrets.

We split our assets down the middle and went our own ways. He offered me the proceeds of the house we'd just sold, and I offered him sole title to the condo we'd just bought. I bought his half of our car from him for seven grand, which was half of what Blue Book rated it at. It was just common sense deciding which of us everything else belonged to. We'd always kept separate bank accounts, which suddenly turned out very convenient.

Alex decided to go to Europe for a couple of months hoping to meet up with Karen and I, not knowing what else to do, headed back to Cory's college, feeling both liberated but yet alone. Alex and I had been together for over two decades, and he had been more than just a lover... also a listener... a comforter (especially when I lost my father)... a companion.

Other than seeing my son, I really had no idea what I wanted to do next.

A month ago, the rest of my life had been planned out. At first that had excited me... the path of my future mapped out.

Now... the map was empty... the journey unclear... and although that excited me, it also scared the shit out of me.

I loved my son.

I loved having s.e.x with my son.

But that had been raw passion over a few wild, kinky days with extra spice from the fear of getting caught. The reality was that the real world now awaited me, awaited us, and I was no longer sure what that meant other than it wouldn't be spent crowded between a pile of boxes and a car door.

S.e.x was s.e.x and it had been f.u.c.k.i.n.g amazing.

But life was a lot more complicated.

So I arrived at Cory's dorm riddled with anxiety. I felt kind of like Julia Robert's character in 'Notting Hill' as I arrived. I had texted him I was coming, but he knew nothing about what had transpired between his father and me.

We had done some naughty texting, but not being in the same place to act on it made it more anti-climactic (pun intended) than satisfying.

I assumed we would have some great s.e.x when I arrived, and I was right.

As soon as I arrived, I texted:

I'm here.

He responded:

Meet me at Thurber Hall, room 432. NOW!!! 

I responded, cheeky and submissive at the same time:

Yes, Master!!!

My c.u.n.t was wet. I wanted his c.o.c.k back in me again. I hadn't been so horny for c.o.c.k since college (if you ignore our three-day backseat f.u.c.k fest).

I was dressed in a s.e.xy sundress that barely hid my t.h.i.g.h highs... and, of course I was sans bra and p.a.n.t.i.e.s.

I had to ask three people how to get where I was going, but eventually I found the building and, with my feet sore (shouldn't have worn four-inch heels to search for a building... but I wanted to look completely hot and s.e.xy for my son). I took the elevator, realizing he must be meeting me in a classroom.

I got off the elevator and headed to room 432.

It was a handicapped bathroom.

I stopped and then I smiled. That brat.

I tried to open the door, but it was locked.

I knocked.

"Who is it?" my son asked from the other side of the door.

"Your s.l.u.t, Master," I answered, after looking around to make sure no one was around to overhear my answer.

He unlocked the door and I walked in. I smiled playfully, "You really went all out on the décor for this lovely trysting place."

"I wasn't sure what the plan was, or how I was introducing you to people, but regardless of either of those issues, I knew I wanted to f.u.c.k you before anything else," he answered.

"Good," I nodded, slipping out of my heels and dropping to my knees. "I've been craving this big d.i.c.k ever since you last coated my face in your dorm room."

"And I've been saving up a pretty full load," he replied, as I fished out his c.o.c.k, already hard.

"You haven't f.u.c.k.e.d any coed s.l.u.ts yet?" I asked, as I stroked his thick shaft.

"I didn't say that," he said. "I just said I've been saving this load."

"S.l.u.t," I teased, before taking his c.o.c.k in my mouth. As I did, I felt a strange sense of jealousy at the idea of some college skank s.u.c.k.i.n.g and f.u.c.k.i.n.g the same d.i.c.k I was s.u.c.k.i.n.g. This is my d.i.c.k. I am his s.l.u.t. I bobbed hungrily, gently reminding him who was the best c.o.c.k sucker ever.

"Oh yeah, I missed those c.o.c.k s.u.c.k.i.n.g lips," he g.r.o.a.n.e.d, as I devoured his entire c.o.c.k like a p.o.r.n star.

I m.o.a.n.e.d on his c.o.c.k in response.

"Yes Mom, the first load gets deposited in that s.e.xy mouth of yours," he promised.

I responded, taking his c.o.c.k out of my mouth, "I hope you have enough loads stored up in these balls to fill all three of Mommy's neglected holes."

"At least twice," he bragged, as he grabbed my head and shoved my mouth back on his c.o.c.k and began thrusting.

Six loads! I thought to myself. That would be a dream come true... pun definitely implied.

"Oh yeah, I plan to f.u.c.k you all day and night, Mommy-s.l.u.t," he told me, as I resumed bobbing. "Our schedule for today is a marathon i.n.c.e.s.t session."

I couldn't help but smile as he resumed f.u.c.k.i.n.g my face. We used to have many marathon nights back at home. Although they only involved things like watching all the Back to the Future movies, or all the Star Wars movies or the craziest, all three Lord of the Rings extended version movies.

The mixture of my warm mouth and his fast pumping was the perfect trigger for his jackrabbit first load to explode in my mouth. There was no warning other than a slight swelling in his d.i.c.k, then an animalistic grunt as his c.u.m exploded in my mouth like a water hose.

I swallowed most of it as he kept f.u.c.k.i.n.g my face... although a little of his c.u.m did leak out of my mouth.

"F.u.c.k, I love having my own Mom c.u.m deposit handy," he g.r.o.a.n.e.d, as he finally pulled out.

"And I like having my own gun around, always hard, always loaded, always ready to shoot me," I smiled, still on my knees as I scooped a little c.u.m off the side of my mouth.

"So where's Dad right now?"

"Maybe in Europe by now; we're both quits, have decided to get an amicable divorce when we get around to it, and we're both fine with it."

"Amicable, you said?"

"Yup, still friends, just not lovers."

"That's way more than I'd hoped for! So what are your plans now that you and Dad are done?"