Be Fascinated

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Chapter 39

Philia unknowingly pushed him away. The shattered Irik collapsed, his head slamming to the floor, and the dagger fell from his hand. Not missing that moment, Philia went on top of him and raised the dagger.

There was no such thing as time.

This guy was nothing but a beast. She had to kill him. From a saint to an ordinary woman, from an ordinary woman to a murderer. She has now even given up being a normal human.

As Philia was about to thrust the dagger down with both her hands as hard as she could, someone grabbed her wrist and stopped her.

She even gave up the whole power she had to kill someone, how could it be so easily… She looked behind her and saw Claude holding her hand with one hand.

“Ho, how…”

“Philia, don’t push yourself.”

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“…….”

“You hurt your shoulder.”

Claude said something out of the situation and took the dagger from her hand.

“Uhh, uggghhh! How on earth!”

Irik, who was lying down, shouted as if he had seen a ghost. Claude sighed.

“I guess you didn’t know that the people of the imperial family are resistant to poison.”

Claude took the dagger from Philia’s hand. Irik struggled, but he was crushed by Philia, unable to move. Claude pressed his forehead to block the movement.

Irik looked at Philia eagerly with the expression of an animal being hunted. But Philia only looked at Irik coldly.

Stab!

The dagger was pierced into Irik’s heart. His blood gushed like a fountain. Blood splashed all over Philia’s body. She watched Irik’s life slip away.

The light in his eyes darkened. In that madness, the vivid expression on his face became as docile as before. Those eyes were desperate as if trying to convey something about him to Philia.

She knew what he was trying to say. However, Philia turned away from the desperate confession that was like a desperate scream. That’s how Irik died.

Tears streamed down from Philia’s eyes. She got up from that spot. Claude also stood up.

She was going to say something to Claude. However, Claude collapsed again, leaning against the wall.

“You said you’re resistant…”

Philia said. Claude laughed.

“Just because I’m resistant doesn’t mean I’m completely numb to poisons I don’t know.”

So will Claude die? Philia looked at Claude. His face was as white as a bloodless statue, but he was still smiling.

“Now you are looking at me.”

Claude looked happy.

“Did you not let me go? I guess you are still watching me.”

“I didn’t watch you. But I had never let you go for a moment.”

Claude didn’t watch her himself, but he seemed to have left surveillance on her somehow. What was the difference… In the meantime, she felt resentment again.

“Philia.”

“…….”

“In your house without you, I painted you.”

“My house?”

Can it be called her house, which was under his sweet confinement, to which he had freely given the ownership? He was mistaken until the very end.

“I thought longing was an inefficient and incomprehensible feeling, but it wasn’t.”

Claude looked up at Philia. Philia didn’t want to hear about his longing for her. Because she thought she would go crazy if she listened to it. Philia’s mouth trembled.

“I…”

At that moment, there was a noise from the surroundings and the door swung open.

They were the knights of the imperial palace. Philia looked at Claude. Philia seemed to want to say something to him.

Because it might be the last, it will definitely be the last.

In the past, love and regret both coexisted for her. But now that feeling has been charred black. So what more could she say?

She had only one thing to say to the person who was about to die.

“Goodbye, Claude.”

Those were the last words she had said to Claude.

Philia ran away. But sadly she had nowhere to run. For a long time, as if to escape, she wandered around the city idly like a madman.

Claude is dead. He must be dead.

She felt a strange sense of liberation. Now no one will be able to interfere with her life. No one will be able to stop her life.

Liberation.

Still, tears welled up in her eyes. When the stars began to rise in the sky, she went back to her house.

She didn’t know why she went home. She didn’t know if she wanted to see Claude’s body or if she regretted that she had turned away from him.

When Philia returned, there was nothing left in the house. For a moment, she wondered if she had dreamt it all.

As she left the boutique, she had been captured by Irik, who was hiding in her house, and Claude and Irik died.

Did such an unrealistic thing really happen?

But seeing the horrendous bloodstains that remained, Philia realized that the dreadful thing was over. Philia headed to where Claude had collapsed.

There were also traces of blood that looked like he had shed. Philia sat on the bloodstain. She hugged her knees and looked at where she was standing.

‘Why didn’t you say anything? Actually, you have a lot to say.’

Philia asked herself. She thought she was free from him, but ironically, she was thinking that he would come one day.

She was scared of him. She was afraid of him. Nevertheless, she was confident that she wanted to see him again.

It’s really crazy.

Death was strange. Thinking that she couldn’t see Claude, she felt empty. She thought she was sick of him, but she was sad to say he wasn’t there. Why was she not happy?

“I……I didn’t want you to die.”

Philia shed tears.

However, as long as Claude is alive, she knows that she will always live with anxiety. How could she explain these contradictory feelings, that she never wanted him to die?

Philia wept sadly. Claude has disappeared from the world. Claude.

“While I hated you, that doesn’t mean I didn’t love you.”

At that moment, Philia realized desperately and collapsed.

If she had been honest from the beginning, then she would have been happy if she was locked up in that house as she was bound by him. Like the Empress, his brother’s wife.

It was only natural that their relationship would be at its worst. Because Claude had deceived her. Because he deceived her and tried to do whatever he wanted.

“Yes, you’re crazy.”

It’s just that she has sympathy for that person. It was her who had to be sympathized with.

“Wake up.”

Philia continued to speak to herself. But that feeling did not go away easily.

How could the time spent mixing flesh together with that person be meaningless? Even Claude was happy when she smiled. He, who said he didn’t know feelings, only developed feelings in front of Philia.

Philia was shedding tears incessantly. She wasn’t happy at all. Really, not a single bit. Philia sobbed for a long time, then collapsed and fell asleep.

While she struggled in a swamp of emotions that she couldn’t even understand.

Philia repeatedly cried and collapsed at the place where he was. She didn’t know why she was crying. As she ate and drank, she drank only water and cried.

Four days passed like that. That day too, when Philia, who had fallen asleep from crying, woke up, she was lying flat on the bed. Apparently, she fell asleep crying on the floor, but why…?

“Are you awake?”

The answer was right there next to her. Bianca was right next to her.

“…Why are you?”

“I went with the knights because High Priest Irik’s movements were unusual.”

“I see…”

Philia answered indifferently.

“It is said that Grand Duke Piast moved too hastily.”

“…….”

“It was my mistake, if I had known he was listening, I should have reported it to the Empress and did it more discreetly. It all happened so fast that I didn’t know Grand Duke Piast was listening. Because of that, your location was exposed.”

“What do you mean exposed?”

“What?”

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