Casual Heroing

“Joey,” I managed to whisk Augustus away to the inn's counter to have a more private chat. Now, he’s congratulating me. “Don’t tell anyone I said this, but you upgraded, man. Like, how did you even… you know what, I’m not sure I want to know. You would destroy my self-esteem. And did you really become so strong?”

“Are you talking about magic or dating? In both cases, the answer is yes,” I show off some banter.

“For all the dry branches of the World’s Tree, Joey. You pulled… I don’t know what to call it. I mean. After this, they will say that you ‘pulled a Joey Luciani.’ Now, though…”

I see Augustus chanting under his breath, and I feel a couple of wards go up.

“You… it was you today,” he said while covering his mouth with a hand.

I simply dish out my signature wink and a cheeky smile.

“And the knowledge Lucinda brought back,” he adds, watching me like a hawk.

I wink again.

He stops for a second, taking in my revelations. He’s clearly shaken. And when he puts his hand back in front of his mouth, he seems on the verge of asking something terribly important.

“Does Princess Laura have any cousins who look like her?”

“Hahahahaha!” I start laughing so hard I need to hold onto the counter for dear life. “Man, Augustus. I love you. Really. Do you serve [Archmage] Titus? If you do, I’ll get your apprenticeship shredded, and you can come with me. To learn real magic.”

He starts laughing, but when he understands that I’m not joking, he goes silent.

“Joey, Titus might not be the best man. But he treats Elves very well. And he knows more magic than many credit him for.”

“Augustus, I never liked my father much. But there was one thing I liked about him. The man was cryptic. Mysterious. He believed that people should follow you in the dark if they wanted to deserve and share your achievements. It’s too easy to go into something with every detail in hand. But he brought this to the extreme, and in an awful way. He wasn’t a nice person. I try to be one, though. That’s why I’m giving away what my proposal entails. If you want to join, I’ll get your apprenticeship from [Archmage] Titus. And if you do, you will never regret it. I can’t say the same if you were to refuse. And you have to give me an answer now. It’s a jump in the dark, Augustus. What do you say?”

“No, I’m sorry.”

Well, that’s that.

…

As we bid goodbye to the [Mages], Princess Laura steps to my side.

“You were robbed of your secrets, and you have no intention of calling that woman out? Do you still harbor feelings for her”?

“Feelings, maybe. Love? Nope. And she just stole the basic stuff. Trust me; magic is much more complicated than the glimpse she got. In the end, Lucinda was just being ‘Human.’ Hm, how can I say that? Well, just a small person, let’s say. She saw the shiny coin and ran away with it, not noticing there was an entire chest full of gems. She’s not a cold-blooded thief, just a kid, really.”

“That Atticus insulted you,” Laura reiterated.

“Well, you did too. But he’s going to face me in the duels, right? About that, what are the rules? Basically, every single [Mage] my age can duel me?”

“Every [Mage] who’s still a student or just freshly graduated,” Stan’s voice comes from behind.

“Well, that’s good. Can they forfeit their duel, or do I have to go through the thousands of people here?”

“They can forfeit their duels,” Stan nodded.

“Good. Then, Princess, I’ll have to whoop their ass so bad that all the others will just forfeit. And I’ll start with that Atticus guy.”

“Titus’s disciple has an outstanding talent, Human. But I guess I have underestimated you.”

As I turn, I find the humanoid form of the Golden Dragon looking at me. He’s clearly been in a fight. Some of his scales are ripped.

“You almost elicited a fight between two [Archmages]. We ended up in a small scrap. But what I’m after is how you dispelled Titus’s [Flight] and enchantment.”

“What? Me? Oh, [Archmage], you flatter me. But didn’t Titus say it was you?” I say with a toothy smile.

“Oh, was it?” he replies with many more teeth.

I tip my hat and wink at him.

“Who knows.”

“Marcus, leave him be. I need to check on my nephews. Can we go now?”

“Tiberius, your patience is thin as always. Yes. I shall show you what great care I have afforded your distant spawn. And don’t worry, I have not told them that you will come. They know of their mother, obviously. But they have no idea what’s going to hit them. How would you like to approach this?”

“Let them meet Joey, and I’ll evaluate their reaction. If they are anything like their older sister, they are losing their noble titles on the spot.”

“And you, Human. Do you really think you can win all these duels?”

“If I were to lose, I would embarrass the memory of the greatest [Archmage] the world remembers,” I say with a wink and another tip of my hat.

“Oh, by the way. Do you have any books on Light Magic and, hm, do you know what ‘waves’ are?”

The Dragon raises a hairless eyebrow.

“I do know about a theory of… we shall study together, young Human. I’ll share my knowledge of Light Magic and my resources. In turn, I’d like to converse with you about your understanding of magic.”

I hear Domitilla, Laura, and even grumbly Lucillus gasp or swear.

What?

Is the Dragon dangerous? Is this a threat?

An [Archmage] just asked a novice to trade knowledge, Joey Luciani. He’s basically admitting you might know as much as him, at least in your own regard. For an [Archmage] of his caliber, it’s a great honor in their society to propose such a thing. In reality, he’s just a shameless old geezer who wants to know more about your weird magic.

I mean, aren’t you the same—

“Is he okay?” I hear [Archmage] Marcus ask.

“That happens from time to time,” Princess Laura answers.

Meanwhile, I’m seizing on the ground with the [Thunderbolt Curse] zapping me to spasms.