Casual Heroing

“The [Student] class has several skills that are simply impossible to replace. It’s a shortcut for those who need to speed up their learning without becoming a [Researcher] or a [Scholar]. From [Curious Mind] to [Learning Fortitude], you have a great range of options that facilitate your learning journey. Magic taxes the mind, but the [Student] class allows it to go beyond those limits without the [Learning Fortitude] skill. On its own, it can provide a boost like no other at low levels.”

Lord Juler speaks to us as if we were idiots for not picking up the class on our own. But to be fair, there was no way we could have known. I mean, I could have. They couldn’t. But Domitilla does have the class. So… “It’s always bureaucracy,” I click my tongue, “always about that damn bureaucracy. Even in this world.”

“Excuse me,” Alba raises her hand, “but if we are already students at the academy, why don’t we already have the class?”

“Child, as I said, it’s because a formal registration is in order. They didn’t go through all the formalities. It may be a problem related to Elven laws as well. The Vanedenis have a relatively simple code of laws, making it possible to enter into simple contracts with other people. Joey Luciani, right here, has taken a disciple as per Vanedeni laws.”

“Oh, that was a Vanedeni contract?”

“Recognized under Vanedeni law,” Lord Juler corrects me. “Every country has a different set of laws. As long as your contract is valid in one of them and recognized as a proper legal document, the class is acquired. [Disciple] does not require any legally binding document, but it’s a much deeper connection that requires--well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“Young Luciani, draft the contracts the same way you created the one for your young [Student]. We will exploit the fact that you have the [Professor] class, albeit at an extremely low level.”

“Well, you don’t have to give me sass for it,” I frown, “it’s not like I always wanted to be a [Professor]. And the fact that I didn’t level up after that practice I gave to the idiots in our class is a testament to the fact that this whole system is a hoax.”

“Laziness remains laziness, no matter the justification,” Lord Juler says with a hint of disdain in his voice.

“Laziness remains laziness,” I parrot.

And then I get zapped.

Jesus.

The others look at my zapping with wide eyes, and, finally, they seem to recall that the person I summoned is actually quite dangerous. They know it’s a Vanedeni, but they don’t really know who they are dealing with.

“That was a warning, young man.” I sigh.

“Now, let us move on,” Lord Juler continues.

“As soon as I have the documents in my possession, I will take them to the Princess and have her endorse them with her royal seal so that no one can contest their validity down the line. That would mean your class gets whisked away just like that, and you lose all the benefits coming with it.”

“So, you are like the [Supreme Archmagus] of the Vanedeni?” Amelia asks.

Lord Juler nods. He looks at Amelia – well, not really at her but right above her head since she’s quite tiny and the old bag is taller than me – and then he looks back at me with narrowed eyes while tapping his foot impatiently on the floor.

“You should start with those contracts, Joey Luciani.”

“Yeah, yeah. [Supreme Archmagus] my ass,” I mumble while sitting down at the dining table.

They don’t know the old man is dead and this is just a soul, but… whatever. Old or not, still a huge pain in the ass. That’s what he is.

The [Supreme Archmagus] pauses for a second as he gathers his thoughts before continuing with his explanation about how things work around here – or how things work in general when it comes to acquiring classes and skills in this world.

“Of course, there are other ways of getting the [Student] class without going through all these bureaucratic contracts that I have been talking about thus far. You can ask someone with the [Professor] or [Teacher] class at a high level to take you in as their student. If they agree – which is practically impossible since—nothing. The simplest way is signing some kind of a contract with them.”

I start drafting out the same type of agreement I had with Domitilla, careful not to err under Lord Juler’s despotic stare. It takes me almost an hour to complete everything, dot all the necessary ‘i’s, and cross all the ‘t’s. Contracts such as this are actually quite long and carefully worded. In this case, they leave a lot of freedom to the recipient since I won’t teach them the same stuff I tried teaching Domitilla – I still wonder if that girl is having a good time or if people keep harassing her because of me. I should really pay a visit to Julia in the near future. But I do need to figure out the teleport spell first.

So much stuff to take care of, I swear.

The grind never ends.

Lord Juler snatches the last page that I apparently had to hand-write and takes a long look at it. He nods to himself after a second and proceeds to distribute the contracts to the four idiots present.

“You’ll sign one copy each, and I will take them to the Princess. Document-keeping is a practice long-forgotten, it seems. They will be effective immediately. Therefore, your class will come at the earliest convenience for your body.”

“So, we sign this thing, and then we get the [Student] class?” Anneus frowns, suspicious.

“That’s correct,” Lord Juler replies.

While Alba and Anneus are reading the thing very carefully, Marcellus and Amelia are already done signing, having barely glanced at the contract. I mean, I drafted them up myself, and to be fair, they could have looked at it after I wrote the first one, but who cares. My right-hand hurts so much that I’m tempted to take a sip from a potion. I’m not sure if Lord Juler would like that, though. The Vanedenis are addicted to tolerating pain, overcoming challenges, and so on.

I, myself, am addicted to rest. That’s what I like—lying down and reading something nice. That’s it, really. Baking? Nah. Too much work. If the class existed, I wouldn’t mind becoming a [Lazy Mage].

I look at Amelia, who’s smiling at Alba while the mixed-blood Ahali carefully reads her copy. There’s a silly smile on the middle-aged woman’s face; it’s something you would expect from a child looking at their older brother playing a game, content with just watching. Or maybe an older brother watching the younger one play a silly game and forgetting about the world's ugliness for a moment.

I pop out a cigar and whistle, waiting for my princess to run in my arms. As I pick up Princess Bianca and I take a mouthful of smoke, I wonder what life puts in front of us here. So many lives, so many pieces of a highly complex puzzle. Amelia, Anneus, Marcellus, and Alba. On top of the other, more distant four—Zahra, Sabina, Aurelia, and Adrastus. Well, more distant for now. Bad stuff has a way of bringing people together, pulling everyone inside a small hut to share a tiny bit of warmth in the dark night.

Are there strip clubs in the citadel?

I don’t know why the question suddenly hits me. And then, another one.

Are there any strip clubs in the Elven society?

I look at my friends and wonder if they will turn into an army of freeloading [Students] or, God forbid, [Scholars] all at the same time; but it’s not my business, I guess. They will face a difficult exam, and I can only help so much, I think. Bringing in Lord Juler was a smart move, but there’s no silver bullet here.

“Joey Luciani,” Lord Juler speaks.

“Yeah, boss?”

“You’ll need to talk with your [Dean] to get the status of [Professor] and [Student]. Explain to him why the class has not been around. I thought you said the man is a great [Researcher]. He should have known about the class, then. It cannot be hidden so deep in the books.”

“Meh, Ariostus is crazy about magic. He’s good with administration, but if I had to guess, he probably tried to minimize the workload his administration needs to carry out. Just a thought. Who knows what the guy is actually up to? I’ll ask, anyway.”

The [Supreme Archmagus] nods.

“Now, our time is up. I need to speak with Joey Luciani.”

Lord Juler clears out the room with a few words, with everyone excited about resting and getting their new class. I imagine they can’t wait to get some stuff to help them study and learn magic.