Dead Man's Harem. Since I can't kill myself, I'll find other ways to be happy.

"Oh, my poor students…" Madame Elisa sighed, her combat sorcerer robe fluttering in the wind as she ran while pulling Devon with her away from the battlefield. Screams and shouts faded into the distance, as soldiers continued to get maimed and killed during the duration of the increasingly bloody battle between the Algorians, the royals, and the two earls' armies.

"Ilyana, deary…" Madame Elisa said while pulling up the cloak over her head to look at her once again. "She's spent all her mana and has gone into mana shock. Not that I can blame her, seeing as how she was held hostage for such a long time. But we'll save that for later. Let's get to the carriage first and head back home first."

Devon nodded. "What about the two earls' armies? Should we notify them that the countess is safe?"

Madame Elisa looked thoughtful for a moment, then shook her head. "No, it's best to let boys be boys and let them fully crush the rebellion. Without the incentive of saving the countess, the two earls would pull away their armies in no time flat. However if the royal army loses or stalemates today due to lack of manpower, the Algorian terrorists will only take it as an invitation to strike again."

"Isn't the earl, Countess Ilyana's father, your employer? Won't he get mad at you?"

The madame chuckled. "Oh, Earl Humphrey? I'll tell him that in the heat of the moment I had to flee the scene with Ilyana because his daughter's protection was of utmost importance to me. He won't be mad, in fact he might even be grateful~"

"Alright," Devon said. He never realized before that the madame was a bit more shrewd than her outer ditzy appearance showed.

They waded through the thick wild grass that extended up to their waists, passing by the reinforcements that continued to arrive in groups of carriages. With the rate of reinforcement, one might think that the Algorians had no chance of holding the line. However, Devon was blown away by the sheer number of Algorians there were. Their population was at least that of a small country, and it was no wonder that they thought themselves to be capable of rebelling against the empire itself.

"Quick, my personal carriage is here. Let's head back home and let Ilyana get some rest."

Madame Elisa got aboard a small carriage, then waited for Devon to climb on board and put the sleeping countess next to him, carefully covering her up with the insignia cloth so that she'd be warm on their journey.

"Back home, boy," she said hurriedly to the carriage driver.

"At once, madame." The carriage driver tipped his hat and showed a lot of respect, which was expected because the madame held a high office in the guild backrooms, giving her tremendous political clout and backing. She was an important person and a formidable sorcerer in her own right.

"Devon, dear, would you mind filling me in on what happened here?" the madame asked.

Devon nodded. "Yeah, sure."

As the carriage began to leave the battlefield, Devon was just about to begin explaining the situation, when several howling shrieks cut through the wind.

Both he and the madame pulled aside the carriage's leather curtain to get a better look at what was going on.

From the mountain nearby, hordes upon hordes of long armed monkeys the size of small gorillas descended upon the battlefield, shrieking and beating their chests. They instantly tore into the battlefield itself, attacking both Algorians and royals alike. Devon winced as he saw a monkey tear off a man's arm and instantly begin to suck at the dislocated arm through the armor, as if it was trying to suck out crab meat from the shell.

"Oh my god…" the madame gasped. "Howler monkeys… but their migration shouldn't be due for more than three months, during the winter. What in the world is going on here?"

Devon shook his head. "I don't know, but let's just focus on getting out of here first. Now."

It was too late though. Hordes of the man-sized howler monkeys from the mountaintops blitzed through the high grass fields and tore through the battlefield, running through the reinforcement carriages as well.

The sea of rabid howler monkeys was approaching their carriage swiftly. "Madame, I think it's best if we turn back and join the battlefield. We'll be safest there."

Madame Elisa snapped out of her shock and nodded. "Yes, you're right my smart Devon. Trying to escape would only isolate us as targets. You heard him, driver. Turn us back towards the battlefield."

[author] @_@

Thank youuuuuuuu soooooooooooooo much Devayne Lewis for pledging <3333333333 [/author]