Dead Man's Harem. Since I can't kill myself, I'll find other ways to be happy.

"Faster!!!!!" a veteran from the fifth regiment shouted towards his carriage driver, as howler monkeys ran beside the carriage. The howlers broke through the fifth regiment's blockade, and now both soldiers and howlers alike were running for their lives, into civilian territory of the empire. This was a disaster scenario for the empire, and the empire's appointed head of military affairs knew that howler monkeys breaching the blockade would cause havoc and violence towards the empire's civilian populace. In an effort to prevent this situation, he deployed the fifth regiment.

"I'm going as fast as I can, sir!" the carriage driver shouted back at the now fleeing fifth regiment veteran.

The fifth regiment was the crown jewel of one of empire's strongest fighting legions. Knight Aurora and the rest of the fifth cut down howler monkeys like it was nobody's business. Combining their firepower with Madame Elisa's meant that not a single howler would get past the blockade. That is, not until the behemoth arrived.

Thirty seconds after the behemoth crashed into the blockade, a quarter of the elite fifth regiment fighting force was instantly killed, and Knight Aurora was severely wounded. The beast let loose a roar that paralyzed even the higher rank tanks, neutralizing their defensive stances, then charged straight through the blockade set up by the fifth.

That's right. A quarter of one of the empire's strongest infantry units was instantly killed by the rampaging behemoth.

That was the power of one of the underworld's premiere warbeasts and siege breakers, one of the juggernauts of the underworld and a beast that even gods respected.

Devon and Madame Elisa's carriage was on the run again, skirting through the open roads and through the rural countryside, where farmers and peasants alike looked on curiously at the military grade carriages that were nearly torn to pieces riding through their backyard.

Boom.

Thud.

Every step that the behemoth took was a miniature earthquake, and a reminder of their impending doom if they didn't get the hell out of the way right now.

"How much longer to Malon?" madame Elisa asked the carriage driver. "I could use a shower." Even in this kind of situation, the madame was calm and teasing.

"It'll take three days, two at top speed madame," the carriage driver responded.

"We'll have to stop by at an inn to rest and take a shower then, right Devon~" said the madame in a casual voice, despite the calamity occurring just outside their small carriage space.

"If we make it," Devon muttered in reply. He wasn't too keen on their chances for survival at this point. Even with his passive, he wasn't sure how it would function if he got swallowed whole by that behemoth. Would he constantly die and then regenerate inside the behemoth's stomach, until he inevitably passed through the digestive system? Or worse, what if he was stuck there forever?

Devon didn't have too much energy left in the tank to talk, and he was feeling a bit sleepy, a state that he would later learn was catatonic mana stupor, or mage's fatigue, as it was referred to by the locals in this world among other cute nicknames for it. It was the same state that the unconscious countess Ilyana was currently experiencing.

"It seems like the behemoth is heading down the main road. Why don't we go down the side road and find a village somewhere?" the madame suggested.

"Sounds alright to me," Devon replied.

"But we'll be in danger from possible howler attacks unless we find a big town!" replied the driver. "Are you sure?"

Madame Elisa frowned, and tapped her finger against her arm. "You are aware of who you're transporting right now, aren't you, mister?"

"Y-yes madame! We'll find a small village to settle in at once!"

The horses neighed as the driver redirected their carriage towards the right, cutting into a beaten path through the fields. Instantly, several of the howler monkeys turned their heads and began traveling towards them. It was strange, and Devon couldn't really rationalize why some of the howlers were so hell bent on following their carriage, but now was not the time for talk.

"Back to business, Devon~ Help me out here~" madame Elisa laughed, throwing aside the curtain and sticking her ornate wooden sorceress staff out the window. "Fireeeee~ball~!"

Devon sighed, as he began to slowly understand why this brunette-red haired madame with a signature beauty mark to the right of her heavy eyelashes was known as the Black Witch of Malon.

…

Roughly thirty minutes later, they managed to escape the rampaging path of the behemoth, but not without sacrifice. Part of the pack of the howlers followed their carriage right into a civilian village, and although he and madame Elisa torched several of them with missiles, there were still a few left.

"What is that thing??" a tavern owner standing outside of his shop shouted in fear, hugging his wife. "Kids, get back in the tavern!"

Within seconds, a warning bell began to toll in the populated village, and merchants and visiting nobles and local residents alike began to shout and scream, as the howler monkeys descended upon the town.

"Don't panic!" shouted madame Elisa in a clear voice. "Gather around me, citizens of the empire. I will keep you safe, ohohoho~"

[author] the chapters just keep coming because i am druuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk and i write faster this way...................... idk if this is healthy???? hehe [/author]