Defeated By Love

Translated by Fairy_Dust

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On the evening of the 31st, Shu Nian left her house to go to the supermarket to buy some daily necessities. 

There was a supermarket located near her house. It was very close, around a ten minutes walk. 

At that time, the sun had yet to completely set. It dyed half of the sky in red. The colour was like splashes of paint. There was sunlight shining down on her body, but it didn’t feel warm at all. The temperature dropped below ten degrees very recently. The chill seemed to have penetrated her clothes and reached into her bones. 

Shu Nian breathed out white puffs of air. She bowing her head while counting her steps in boredom. 
  
Before she could count to a hundred, Shu Nian heard someone call her name. 

It was a woman with some uncertainty in her tone: “Are you Shu Nian?” 

Shu Nian followed the sound. There was not only one person but a group of about five or six people. They were all faces that she knew. The person who just called her was Ruan Xitong, the girl who phoned her the other day. 

Xu Zeyuan was also standing there at the back with a boy. 

Ruan Xitong seemed to be unable to remember the attitude Shu Nian had during the phone call. She smiled at her: “Is it really you? It’s been so long since we’ve seen each other but you haven’t changed.” 

Shu Nian nodded at her. She didn’t know what to say back. 

A girl next to her asked. “Where are you going?” 

Shu Nian answered honestly: “I’m going to the supermarket.” 

“We bought a few things just now. We’re planning to have hot pot at the class leader’s house.” Ruan Xitong invited her to join them. “It’s the same class reunion I called you about before. Let’s go together.” 

“No.” Shu Nian immediately refused her. “You guys go and have a good time.” 

“Are you really not coming?” Ruan Xitong was being stubborn. “Not only are we there but everyone else is already at the class leader’s house. We just came out to buy some things…” 

Before she could finish speaking though, Xu Zeyuan interrupted her: “If she doesn’t want to go then she won’t go. Ruan Xitong, why are you still trying to persuade her?” 

“…” 

A moment of cold silence. 

Shu Nian pursed her lips and repeated one of her previous sentences: “You guys have a good time.” 

Then, she continued to walk in the direction of the supermarket. 

Someone began following her afterwards and Shu Nian could very faintly hear Ruan Xitong’s angry voice behind her: “Wasn’t it him who broke up with her? Why is he suddenly angry now? Is he crazy…?” 

Shu Nian walked a few more steps before turning back and saying: “What do you want?” 

Xu Zeyuan raised the brim of his hat a little and exhaled: “I’ll take you there.” 

Shu Nian declined: “No need.” 

Xu Zeyuan insisted: “I’ll take you there.” 

Shu Nian also continued to insist: “Go back.” 

Xu Zeyuan stood where he was and didn’t move. He just stared at her. 

Shu Nian didn’t want to argue with him anymore. She turned her head around and continued to walk forward. 

Xu Zeyuan followed her and asked in a cold voice: “Are you with Teacher Ah He?” 

Shu Nian paused but she didn’t answer him. 

Her reaction, in Xu Zeyuan’s eyes, was confirmation to his question. He also became silent and after a long time, he said: “Shu Nian, I went to look for you after.” 

Xu Zeyuan really didn’t think that their break-up would have such a great impact on her. 

She was picked up by her parents and then she took a long leave which she never came back from. She also moved house and didn’t answer any of her phone calls. No one could get in contact with her. 

It was like she fell off the face of the earth. 

Shu Nian wondered in doubt: “Why did you look for me?” 

" "

Xu Zeyuan lowered his eyes: “I shouldn’t have broken up with you at that time, right?” 

Hearing those words, Shu Nian looked at him: “Do you feel guilty over this?” 

“…” 

“There’s no need for that.” Shu Nian really didn’t care that much. “It’s normal to be together when you like each other and separate when you don’t anymore. This is your right; you can use it whenever you want.” 

“…I don’t dislike you anymore.” Xu Zeyuan clenched his fist and built up his courage. “Shu Nian, I regret it now.” 

As soon as those words were said, Xu Zeyuan felt relieved. Immediately, his whole chest was filled with courage. He looked at Shu Nian and nervously repeated himself: “I regret it.” 

The light next to them was dim, the lamp was flashing. The cold wind blew stray dirt up and it made circles on the ground. The sound of a car’s horn could be heard and a couple’s laughter sounded from the distance. The leaves on the tree rustled. 

The very next moment, Shu Nian’s phone rang. She lowered her eyes and whispered a single: “Let me answer the phone first”, before answering it. 

It was Xie Ruhe. 

His tone was a little low. He seemed to be in a bad mood: “Shu Nian, are you free?” 

Shu Nian replied: “Yes, what’s wrong?” 

Xie Ruhe was silent for a bit and stated: “I’m rehabilitating well.” 

Shu Nian then said: “En, that’s good.” 

After that, it was silent again. Xie Ruhe suddenly spoke: “Today is December 31st.” 

She wanted to say that she knew but she didn’t get the chance to before she stopped and remembered something. 

December 31st. 

…It was Xie Ruhe’s birthday. 

Xie Ruhe asked her softly: “Do you want to eat cake?” 

Shu Nian pinched her sleeves because of her guilty conscience. She didn’t know how to respond to him for a while. After a long time, she asked. “Do you want to eat cake?” 

“En.” 

There was no joy or anger in his voice.  

Shu Nian licked her lips and said in hesitation: “I’ll buy one for you then?” 

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