Don’t Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin

translator: baumkuchen  editors: serefina, glitterypanda

Chi Xiaochi’s words made the back of 061’s head abruptly turn cold. 

This guess wasn’t utterly unthinkable, because 061 realised that not counting the experiences of other systems, for all the hosts he had before, they’d all had very similar personalities.

……They were all weak, indecisive, timid people who would hardly disobey any rule.

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But 061 soon found a reasonable explanation.

061 said, “But the system picked you. How would you explain that?”

Chi Xiaochi had no way of answering that question, “En……”

Just then, Cheng Yuan’s cell phone rang. It was an unfamiliar number. 

Chi Xiaochi casually picked up, “Hello, who is this?”

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The person on the other end was a middle aged man, speaking with a strong accent, “Is this Cheng Yuan? I’m Yang Baihua’s father.”

Chi Xiaochi really wanted to be a little playful and say, ‘what a coincidence, so am I’. 

But he remained restrained, keeping a soft and gentle attitude, entirely the image of a good child, “Ah, hello Uncle.” 

Judging by the echo from the other end of the call, the other party should have put him on speaker, and he should now have more than one pair of ears listening to him speak.

Yang Baihua’s father said, “Are you free tomorrow? Your aunt would like to have a chat with you.”

From Cheng Yuan’s memories, Yang Baihua’s father was weak, playing no role in any family matters other than putting food on the table, while Yang Baihua’s mother was the tough one.  

Clearly, the latter was more difficult to handle.

Chi Xiaochi didn’t make things hard for Yang Baihua’s father, saying, “Alright, I’ll pick the location. Last time Uncle and Aunt came to the city to play and I wasn’t able to accompany you two, so at the very least, I’ll have to invite you two to a meal tomorrow. As for the details, like when and where it’ll be, I’ll contact Yang Baihua.”

“Get your parents to come, too.”

“My parents are very busy, so I’ll see. I can’t confirm if they’ll be able to come.” 

This adept move of changing from being a guest to becoming a host had already gone beyond what Yang Baihua’s father was able to handle. He hummed and hawed for half a day before finally choking out a “thanks” and hurriedly hanging up.

061 asked, “You’re going? Alone?”

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Chi Xiaochi said, “Don’t I still have you?” 

061 said, “When the time comes and they start making a fuss……”

Chi Xiaochi already had a plan, “They won’t be able to.”

It was only on the next day, when they formally met, that 061 finally realised that Chi Xiaochi’s “they won’t be able to”, had a double meaning. 

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First of all, the place he had chosen for them to meet was the famous Skyscape Rotary Restaurant, a place where a medium steak cost 800 yuan. In its extremely refined environment, everyone ordered and spoke in a soft voice. The moment anyone got loud, a security guard with a baton strapped to his waist would be there to remind them to quiet down.

Secondly, if Yang Baihua’s mother was fierce, Chi Xiaochi was even fiercer.

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This noble temperament of Chi Xiaochi’s that had been refined from years in showbiz was truly extraordinary, often causing people to forget about how he’d walked out of a tube-shaped apartment. It was a base place, steeped in turmoil, where all kinds of people resided and where people could, just for a head of garlic, put their hands on their hips and fight for more than half a day.  

That day, Chi Xiaochi tidied himself up, not necessarily with the utmost care, but at least enough to match the atmosphere of the restaurant.

He came very early and ordered all the dishes in advance.

The dishes he ordered were all Chinese. He wasn’t so bad as to make things hard for Yang Baihua’s mother in this respect. 

When Yang Baihua and his mother appeared in the entrance of the restaurant together, Chi Xiaochi welcomed them with a smile.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Upon first setting eyes on Cheng Yuan, Yang Baihua’s mother didn’t at all think of him as “a little shameless, stinking brat who’d seduced her son”.

He looked different from the girly and seductive person she’d imagined. Cheng Yuan had jet-black hair, with no traces of dye. There were no messy bits and bobs hanging around his neck and arms, just a simple watch which was lowkey in every aspect other than its exorbitant price. His skin was snow-white, his features delicate. It was unknown if it was because of his clothing, but he exuded a languid, noble air from inside and out. He had a slight smile on his face, but it was very hard to tell what he was truly thinking on the inside. 

Yang Baihua was in a daze.

He had never seen Cheng Yuan dressed so well.

At the beginning, Yang Baihua had even asked Cheng Yuan, isn’t your family very rich, why do you still just wear white shirts and jeans?

Cheng Yuan had replied, self-satisfied, I look good in white shirts and jeans. 

Yang Baihua had asked this, but in his heart, he was completely aware of why.

……Cheng Yuan had done this in order to not give him pressure.

Just like how now, Cheng Yuan, dressed neatly in a small suit, gave Yang Baihua an indistinct sense of oppression, making him feel like in front of him, he became a head shorter.

He called out awkwardly, “Xiao Cheng.” 

Yang Baihua’s mother had been sizing up the restaurant’s overly elegant decorations. Just as she was starting to lose her confidence, she heard the two words “Xiao Cheng”, only then seeing the young man smiling politely and modestly in front of her.

Seeing that Chi Xiaochi had come alone, Yang Baihua’s mother’s face darkened.

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It could be said that this expression was utterly different from the beaming smile she’d had when accepting the Cheng family’s proposal for Yang Baihua and Cheng Yuan to marry. 

Chi Xiaochi didn’t care about this.

As a person from the entertainment industry with hundreds of thousands of black powder fans, he would have long since become depressed if he cared about how others saw him.

He led the mother and son into the private room. 

This private room was separated from the outside world by a bamboo curtain, making it suitable for a conversation but not for a quarrel.

Yang Baihua’s mother was clearly also aware this really wasn’t her home turf. For a moment, she became angry. After she sat down, she immediately questioned, “Your parents? Didn’t we already agree to meet?”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Chi Xiaochi said, “Auntie, yesterday I told Uncle ‘I’ll see’. My parents are very busy and currently can’t spare the time to come. Besides, I don’t think it’s necessary to get parents to deal with this situation. It’s a problem between adults, not a junior high school scuffle.”

These words made Yang Baihua’s face turn green, then white. He spoke up to try and change the topic, “Cheng Yuan, this place is too expensive.” 

“It’s not your money. It’s me paying, so of course I had to bring Aunt to the best place possible,” Chi Xiaochi smiled at Yang Baihua’s mother, “Auntie, I ordered a few dishes, you should try them. If they’re not to your taste, we can order something else.”

Yang Baihua’s mother pulled a grasshopper face. She didn’t move.

Chi Xiaochi thoroughly understood. 

Given her attitude towards him, she had probably already heard Yang Xiaoyan’s or Yang Baihua’s own version of events from their mouths and knew that he had no intention of helping Yang Xiaoyan.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Thus, in her eyes, Cheng Yuan, having lost all exploitation value, was just a little slut who’d led her son onto a bent path.

Their family didn’t have anyone else who could resolve Yang Xiaoyan’s problem, but Yang Baihua’s mother felt like her son had been led astray by Cheng Yuan and simply couldn’t lower her voice and stifle her anger to speak humbly in front of such a person.

So, as to what kind of tactics she would use, Chi Xiaochi was well aware.

When the dishes were served, while she didn’t eat, Chi Xiaochi ate, since anyways the one whose heart was burning with anger wasn’t him.

Before he even had two mouthfuls, Yang Baihua’s mother couldn’t sit still any longer, “How old are you?” 

“I’ll soon be 23.”

Yang Baihua’s mother sneered, “You’re at such a young age, but you can still do such a horrible thing like shaming someone to death and ruining their life.”

Chi Xiaochi was curious, “How did I ruin a life?”

Yang Baihua’s mother said, “A man doing that kind of thing with another man, aren’t you ashamed? If every man on Earth did this kind of abnormal thing, humans would have died out.”  

These words weren’t pleasant to hear, but Chi Xiaochi remained tranquil and even-tempered.

Everyone in the world had the right to hate something. Besides, at Yang Baihua’s mother’s age, her views were already set in stone. Chi Xiaochi didn’t plan on debating this with her either.

Furthermore, Chi Xiaochi believed this wasn’t her real reason for coming.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

Sure enough, Yang Baihua’s mother’s next line was, “You need to help with Xiaoyan’s matter.”

Inwardly, Chi Xiaochi thought, here it is.

……This was Cheng Yuan’s last hurdle. 

Cheng Yuan having had a relationship with Yang Baihua was unchangeable. The Yang family couldn’t accept this matter. As such, if he let the Yang family keep this leverage, it would forever be a vexing inconvenience to Cheng Yuan.

Only after passing this hurdle could he finally be considered to have truly succeeded in his task. 

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He swallowed the food in his mouth, but his eyes were fixed on Yang Baihua, “What do you mean by ‘need to’?” 

Yang Baihua’s mother, “I heard from Baihua that you’re from the Cheng family. You two were partners for a time. If this matter is exposed, it would be disgraceful to your Cheng family.”

Chi Xiaochi cocked his head to the side, seemingly doubtful, “Exposed? Who’s going to expose this?”

Yang Baihua’s mother said coolly, “Whether it gets exposed or not all depends on you.” 

Since finding out from Yang Xiaoyan that her son had turned into a homosexual waste, Yang Baihua’s mother was furious, but also found a way to resolve Yang Xiaoyan’s issue.

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

From her point of view, rich people all needed to maintain face, as their face was their life, their face was as big as a mountain. Having dated another man was a matter that their relatives and neighbours would whisper about behind their back for the rest of their life.

So she was utterly self-assured of her success.

She had seen a lot of little brats of Cheng Yuan’s age, and while they looked like they feared nothing on earth, all of them were inexperienced soft-boiled eggs who would piss their pants in terror at the slightest scare. 

Seeing Chi Xiaochi remain quiet in blank-faced contemplation, she pushed her advantage, “You’re a singer and your family does business, so if your reputation is ruined……”

Chi Xiaochi put down his chopsticks, and stared quietly at Yang Baihua’s mother, “If my reputation is ruined, I can go study in an overseas music academy; if my family’s reputation is ruined, there’s business to be had overseas; if our reputation is ruined amongst our relatives, we can live far apart from them and break off contact.”

Having spoken to this point, the corners of his lips rose, “But if your reputation is ruined, where can you go?” 

Yang Baihua’s scalp broke out in pins and needles. He stared incredulously at Chi Xiaochi.

Chi Xiaochi was beaming from ear to ear as he leaned back against his seat, “I couldn’t be gay on my own. I have my half of the military medals, and you have your half. At worst, everyone’s reputations can be ruined together, so it can be perfectly fair.”

Yang Baihua’s mother had never thought that Chi Xiaochi would actually not follow along with her at all and even turn it around to threaten herself. Her blue veins bulged. 

Yang Baihua’s face was ashen, “Cheng Yuan, my mother was just anxious. She’s old, don’t threaten her.”

“I’m anxious too,” Chi Xiaochi shrugged, “But no matter how anxious, one needs to hide their tail before leaving the house. I can see that Auntie cares so much about reputation, so of course I need to help her think through some things. In the event that your ‘good reputation’ spreads, I wonder if there will still be any ladies willing to help continue your family line.”

The four words “continue your family line” harshly stomped on Yang Baihua’s mother’s weak spot.  

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Yang Baihua’s mother almost jumped to her feet in a rage. She gnashed her teeth in anger as she cursed at him, “Fucking AIDS bag!” These three words could already be considered quite civilized for her. As for the rest following that, Chi Xiaochi refused to describe it. 

In short, it was very nutritious and enriching. 

But she only managed to get out two lines of curses before noticing silence had fallen all around her.

Everyone stared at her in astonishment, making her face and ears burn. She had to forcibly choke back the complete extent of the skills that she was originally going to display; the extent of her internal injuries could be imagined.

Chi Xiaochi was as immovable as a mountain, “Auntie, you can’t talk about Yang Baihua like that.” 

He leaned an arm on the table, and said, “Also, Yang Baihua, you said ‘threaten’ just now. You’re wrong. Just now can’t be considered a threat. This can.”

Story translated by Chrysanthemum Garden.

He stared towards Yang Baihua’s mother, and said, beaming, “I know the address of your village. Last year, when I bought you guys nutrients, I was the one who sent them.

“If you dare to raise a fuss, I’ll dare to say that Yang Baihua has erectile dysfunction. I’ll send out pamphlets and brocade banners, and if that doesn’t work, I can carve a monument and have it placed at the entrance of your village. I don’t mind doing this, I just don’t know if you, madam, will be able to accept it.”