Dungeon Farming: Reborn as a Dungeon Lord, cultivating life inside a cave.

Following the order of the chosen one I led the two hundred fifty six orcs around the mountain to hunt for the Second Princess of the long eared fallen kingdom.

Honestly I find this quest more of a punishment than a proper order.

For the mighty me to be reduced to a hunting dog...

Ha! All my brothers must be laughing at my back!

And the reason for the punishment is that our battalion failed twice in taking over this damn long eared fortress walls, reducing our numbers to just a bit lower than two hundred men.

So, considering our results, I already expected to be punished and I wouldn't be surprised if our whole battalion had been dissolved and our soldiers distributed among the stronger ones with better results.

Sigh...

Suddenly the strategist come report to me.

"Commander! There is a village 3 km ahead!"

Great! Let's use this chance for a warming up!

I stop the march for a second by rising my right hand and turn to my soldiers.

"All troops, ready your weapons! It seems we will have a snack before the main dish!"

"""Ooooohhhh!!!!"""

"Forward! March!"

.

..

...

As we finally reach the village, all our expectations are turned off.

The village is completely desert.

"Shit!"

I turn to the strategist and shout at him.

"Explain! Or you will be used to appease our hunger!"

The strategist trembles and answers.

"Sir, it was not like this a week ago! We even have reports of the number of villagers! Something must have happened that made them run."

"Something, heh?"

"B-but don't worry! I will make sure to find where they run off to in a-"

"No need! Our objective is just ahead! The faster we take care of it, the faster we can go back to War and win back the honor we lost in our last two defeats!"

"Understood, sir!"

"But just to make sure there is no loose end, put fire to the village. I want to see everything burning in one hour!"

"Yes, sir!"

The strategist and his peons worked fast and soon the whole village turned into an aggregation of bonfires.

We watched the fire burn and unfortunately we heard no cries or scream from inside.

"Boooring! All troops, advance! Our target should be located in a cave a few hours from here!"

"""Ooohhhh...."""

.

..

...

We climb the mountain and finally reach the cave after a bit over two hours.

"So here is the cursed cave that killed Raul? I expected something bigger..."

"Commander, your orders!"

"First surround this place! I want to make sure not even a fly can escape from this cave our permission! Next I want scouts to search around the mountain! Look for any other possible entrance or exit! Third, I want you to assemble a raid group to test their defenses. Because of the last wipe out, we got no info on the enemy, but they got info on us! So I want to balance the scales by collecting some info before attacking. Understood?"

"Yes sir! Right away sir!"

The soldiers started moving again and I sat back at an improvised chair watching them work.

Boooring!

Damn! I shouldn't have killed that last slave I got from the raid!

Had I spared her, at least I would have something to play now...

Sigh...

"Commander, report!"

"Speak!"

"We discovered traces of carts and people entering this cave recently! We suspect they are the villagers from the village below!"

"Hahahahahaha! I see! Great job, soldier! Take one beer and keep working hard!"

"Thank you sir!"

"Great! If we are lucky we can get some pretty toys aside from the Princess!"

As I imagined what kind of plays I would do to the slaves we capture, the other soldiers kept working and soon the camp was set, and the first raid team chosen.

The strategist arrived at my tent.

"Sir, we finished surrounding the cave with wood fences to stop anyone from escaping, 5 squads were sent to scout for other entrances, and the raid team has been made and is waiting your call to start their attack."

"All right. Tell them to start right away! But if they find any danger, prioritize informing us over continuing exploring."

"Yes, sir"

The raid team departed and soon came back.

"Sir, the raid team has a report!"

"Say it!"

"After entering the cave and walking for some time they came across a large hall with many odd statues!"

"Hmm... Any danger?"

"None yet."

"OK, tell them to proceed while being careful!"

"Yes, sir!"

...

"Sir, another report!"

"Say it..."

"At the end of the large hall they discovered another cave!"

"Yeah, so?"

"That's all!"

Fuck! I'm surrounded by idiots! No wonder we lost so many soldiers on that last assault!

"OK! Keep going! And don't bother me unless some sign of danger appear!"

"Yes, sir!"

...

"Sir, o-"

"I know! Just tell me already!"

"As we proceeded the tunnel we passed through a door..."

"And?"

"And we found a lot of armors spread on the ground. Raul troop's armors."

"Good! Finally something important! So, how were the armors? What kind of damage they had?"

"W-we didn't look..."

"THEN GO BACK THERE RIGHT NOW AND LOOK AT IT!"

...

...

...

Night arrived...

???

Why are they not back yet?

"Strategist!!!"

"Yes sir!"

"Where is the raid team!?"

"They didn't come back yet..."

"Then what are you waiting for! Make a new team and research what happened!"

"Yes sir!"

Sometimes I wonder how the hell did this guy get promoted to strategist...

...

"Sir, re-"

"Talk!"

"We found the equipment of the first raiding team along Raul's team equipment!"

"Oh... and the team corpses?"

"Their corpses have vanished, sir."

"What!?"

"Their corpses have vanished, sir."

"I heard it! What I want to know is how they vanished!"

"We don't know...also..."

"Spill it!"

"the second raid team is not feeling well... we wonder if they are cursed..."

"Let's have a look, take me to them!"

"Yes, sir!"

...

After a short check up, I easily found it they were not cursed but poisoned, the symptoms are so clear one must be blind to not notice! Oh fuck, it seem like the strategist is blind...

"FUCK! These weaklings are using poison!!!"

"Are you sure, sir?"

"Did you say anything?"

"N-no! Of course not!"

I swear I will kill this idiot after this mission is over!

"All right, since we know it's poison, we need antidotes or something similar...Good thing I send those raids to test the grounds first, if the whole battalion entered the cave and got poisoned it would be catastrophic! Idi-I mean, Strategist!"

"Yes, sir!"

"Send an eagle to the army saying that we need something to deal with poisonous gas!"

"Understood!"

The strategist started heading out but stopped midway and asked.

"Sir, what about the second raid team?"

"Let them rest. If they are lucky and survive, good. If not...well, four less to share the prize."

"Understood!"