Fantasy Farm

translator: baumkuchen

Compared to when he had left, Bai Yuehu was donned in an extra layer of a thick, white cloak. It seemed to have been made from some kind of animal’s fur. It was snow white and soft, and incredibly warm. Before the two left, Bai Yuehu pulled off his cloak with natural movements and smoothly swept it over Lu Qingjiu’s shoulders. 

Lu Qingjiu was stunned for a moment. He looked up at Bai Yuehu, just about to speak before he heard Bai Yuehu say, “You’re bad with cold, you should wear it.”

“What kind of fur is this?” Lu Qingjiu stroked a hand down the cloak. This fur was soft yet durable to his touch, with not a single hair out of place. It was even slightly glossy with the light gleam of first-grade fur. The moment Bai Yuehu draped this cloak over his shoulders, his body felt a rush of warmth.

“I don’t know either,” Bai Yuehu said, “I won it off of someone.”

Lu Qingjiu asked, “Won it?” 

Bai Yuehu said, “Yes, we made a bet.”

Upon hearing this, Lu Qingjiu didn’t ask any further. He just thought inwardly, gambling really was harmful to one’s health, they didn’t even lose money, they even lost their skin…

Clad in a thick coat, Lu Qingjiu walked into the snow with his umbrella and Bai Yuehu. He didn’t know if it was just his imagination, but he felt like on the route back, the wind and snow had died down by a lot. He didn’t even feel cold.

After getting home, Lu Qingjiu pulled all the straw people out to air in the living room. It was fortunate that there wouldn’t be anyone visiting in the winter, otherwise, the moment they entered the house and saw the straw people covering the floor, the less brave might be scared into a heart attack on the spot. 

Xuan Yu had said that after three days, they would return to normal, so in these three days, only the pair of Bai Yuehu and Lu Qingjiu were left in the house.

Bai Yuehu and Lu Qingjiu were both the type to be fond of quiet, so they were perfectly happy like this. Lu Qingjiu found an opportunity to ask Bai Yuehu about Xuan Yu, but Bai Yuehu only gave him a rough introduction of Xuan Yu. He said that he was an eminent monk, who should have become a god long ago, but because of some matters, he had stayed in the mortal world. He was one of the rare few powerful humans, but he rarely participated in secular affairs. The last time he’d appeared, had been more than ten years ago.

“Then what did he come here for?” Lu Qingjiu asked.

“Maybe he wanted to visit an old friend,” Bai Yuehu replied. 

An old friend? He was probably referring to Lu Qingjiu’s grandma, but he just didn’t know what the story between him and his grandma was. Lu Qingjiu felt slightly regretful. He found that he didn’t actually know a lot about his grandmother. When he was younger, he hadn’t been very thoughtful, and by the time he’d grown up, he had already left Shuifu village. The next time he’d returned here, things had remained the same, but the people had changed.

By the morning of the third day, Yin Xun, who had turned into straw, finally turned back to his original form. Along with him, was Xiao Hua, Xiao Hei, the little fox… and the Rain Master’s Concubine who had been hiding in the little fox’s fluffy neck ruff. To tell the truth, because she didn’t appear often, Lu Qingjiu had almost forgotten about her…

The people who had just turned back threw themselves into a group hug and began sobbing together. Yin Xun was crying so heard that snot and tears were streaming down his face, making a disdainful look appear on Lu Qingjiu’s face when he saw it.

“Jiu-er ah, you’re really a good person,” Yin Xun said, “That monk is really too much, he actually wanted to burn us. Wuwuwuwu, I’m just an innocent little mountain god!” 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m just an innocent little piggy.” Next to Yin Xun, Xiao Hua joined him in wailing.

The little fox also “jijijiji”-ed, a sad, tearful look on its face.

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After a while of this, Lu Qingjiu’s head began to throb with splitting pain from their howls. “Can you guys not cry anymore? What if I make you guys something to eat?” 

Yin Xun, “You don’t even love me, you don’t even care about how I was doing—”

Lu Qingjiu, “I shouldn’t have fucking given birth to you back then.”

Yin Xun still wanted to keep on crying, but after a look from Bai Yuehu, who had just walked in from outside, he hurriedly went quiet, saying, “Deal, I won’t cry anymore, so make me something good to eat.”

Lu Qingjiu, “Ai!” 

It was truly too cold that day. In Yin Xun’s words, they should absolutely not go out and pee in the wild, otherwise, after they were done peeing, a certain part would have become single-use only disposable item.

When it got cold, people didn’t really want to move. If not for having to comfort Yin Xun, Lu Qingjiu really didn’t want to make anything too troublesome.

Because the power had been cut off, their home’s fridge had been moved outside in the snow long ago. Thinking about it, it shouldn’t be called a fridge anymore, it should be considered a warmer, because the temperature in the freezer was even a little higher than the outside temperature.

Lu Qingjiu had Bai Yuehu bring back a fresh Conglong for that night. Conglong meat was truly too good, no matter how you cooked it, it was delicious. After Lu Qingjiu had Bai Yuehu cut up the Conglong, he separated the ribs, then left the rest of the bones to be used to stew soup. The meat was fried, and the ribs were roasted over a charcoal fire. 

The Conglong’s bones were slightly thinner than that of goats. Furthermore, it didn’t have any gaminess, and you didn’t need to worry about not cooking it well. He first marinated the meat in red sauce for a few hours, then placed it on top of the charcoal fire and roasted it slowly over a small fire.

The house soon began to fill with the rich aroma of roasted meat. The thin layer of fat on the edge of the ribs was sizzling. The fatty oils dripped into the fire basin, making a crackling noise.

Lu Qingjiu first gave the roasted meat to Bai Yuehu and Yin Xun to stave off their hunger, and gave the other three little guys a little taste.

“It’s so delicious, Jiu-er you should have some too.” Yin Xun took a bite. The side of his mouth still marked with black streaks, he hurriedly turned and said to Lu Qingjiu, “Have it while it’s still hot, have it while it’s still hot.” 

Lu Qingjiu smiled and said, “You guys eat first, I’ll wait for the next piece.”

Just as he said that, Bai Yuehu, who was sitting next to him, actually placed the ribs that he hadn’t yet touched next to Lu Qingjiu’s mouth with natural movements.

Lu Qingjiu first froze, then lowered his head and took a bite with a smile. Sure enough, it was delicious. The outside was a little crispy, but the meat inside was incredibly exquisite and juicy. After having been marinated for a long time, the ribs had absorbed the taste in his sauce, with just the perfect amount of saltiness and even the fragrance of spice.

When he ate it, Lu Qingjiu thought, if I just had a fresh lemon to squeeze on it, it would be even more perfect. 

Seeing Bai Yuehu and Lu Qingjiu’s movements, Yin Xun swallowed heavily. But he didn’t dare to say anything, simply lowering his head and continuing to eat his ribs in silence.

Bai Yuehu also didn’t feel like there was anything wrong with what he had done, very naturally finishing off the the ribs which still had Lu Qingjiu’s bite mark in them. The bone broth in the pot was also just about done, tasting extremely delicious. When they got sick of the taste of the ribs, taking a sip of this would be very refreshing for their palate. And after drinking the soup, their bodies would also feel incredibly warm. The roasted sweet potatoes which had been placed inside the charcoal basin were also a good staple, sweet, soft and glutinous, Lu Qingjiu really liked them.

As Lu Qingjiu roasted the meat and ate, without realising it, he’d become full. Yin Xun was about the same as him. His stomach had already become round. As he stroked his stomach and let out a belch, his expression froze for a few seconds. “Have I forgotten something important?”

Lu Qingjiu, “What?” 

Yin Xun, who had bummed a full day’s worth of food in Lu Qingjiu’s house, as natural as can be, shot to his feet. He clapped a hand to his head and cried out in horror, “Fuck, fuck! I fucking forgot to go home and renew the incense!!”

After saying that, he turned and ran. Lu Qingjiu, unable to stop him in time, saw him bolt away like a scared rabbit, running away without looking back just like that.

Lu Qingjiu, “…How does he run so fast.”

Bai Yuehu said, “That’s his only talent.” 

Lu Qingjiu, “…” Yin Xun’s memory was really something. By the time he remembered, the table in his house might have been burnt through already.

After Yin Xun, who had sprinted back home, found that the incense in his home had already been continued, he gave Lu Qingjiu a call. At this time, Lu Qingjiu was soaking his feet as he stroked Bai Yuehu’s fluffy tails in a natural movement. It had to be said, humans really had a kind of complex that was hard to describe with words for fluffy things. They were completely unable to maintain their self-control in front of such a great temptation.

Upon hearing the phone ring, Lu Qingjiu lazily picked up, purposely keeping the phone a little further away from his ears.

Sure enough, in the next moment, Yin Xun’s horrified voice sounded from the other end, “Lu Qingjiu, how was the incense in my home continued? It wasn’t you, right? It wasn’t you, right——” 

“I wasn’t me,” Lu Qingjiu said, “It was Bai Yuehu.”

After hearing Lu Qingjiu’s answer, Yin Xun let out a deep sigh of relief. “That’s good, that’s good, you really scared me to death.”

Lu Qingjiu asked, “Is everything okay over there?”

Yin Xun said, “There’s nothing big.” 

Lu Qingjiu said, “What would have happened if the fire went out?”

Yin Xun said, “Ah… Then there would be a big problem.”

Lu Qingjiu said, “Since it’s so important, why was looking over this left to you? I don’t think you’re anyone all that powerful.” To tell the truth, after all this time, he hadn’t felt anything godlike about Yin Xun. In his eyes, Yin Xun was just his slightly unreliable childhood friend. If he had to name something about Yin Xun that was godlike, Lu Qingjiu would only be able to say that he could be particularly crazy at times.

Yin Xun, “You’re very likely to lose me as a friend when you say things like that.” 

Lu Qingjiu, “No problem, when that time comes, I can just catch you and keep you as my pet.”

Yin Xun, “…” Lu Qingjiu, I’m begging you, please act like a person.

Lu Qingjiu could even practically see Yin Xun’s wronged expression of “wanting to retort but being unable to find the words” at this time. He laughed and said, “Okay, I’ll stop joking with you, I’m going to bed, goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” Yin Xun hung up. 

After ending the call, Lu Qingjiu let out a lazy yawn, and dragged the big, fluffy tails to him out of habit. Just that, when he pulled it over, he had the vague feeling that something wasn’t right. When he looked down, he was shocked silly.

Lu Qingjiu stiffly raised his head and saw Bai Yuehu sitting by the window, eating his melon seeds. He hadn’t noticed anything had happened. He forced out, “Yuehu ah…”

Bai Yuehu looked at him, “En?”

Lu Qingjiu said, “That, I just have a question.” 

Bai Yuehu, “?”

Carefully choosing his words, Lu Qingjiu forced out with great difficulty, “If a fox spirit’s tail accidentally falls off, will anything happen?”

Bai Yuehu’s expression froze for a moment. He’d clearly understood the meaning hidden behind Lu Qingjiu’s question. He slowly looked down, and saw that those nine big fluffy tails had actually separated from his body, and were held in the arms of a horrified Lu Qingjiu.

Bai Yuehu, “…” Not good. 

Lu Qingjiu, “…Yue…hu…?”