Forbidden Desires

My dear readers,

Well if you’re still reading the book man god help you because you’re hooked. I hope. So we will do a Q and A soon. I want reviews and comments oh please fill the book with it. It’s something I like as a writer. To know what you are thinking.

When I started this book I was well 15 years old, back then the book was less sėxuȧŀ and it did not hold the same meaning to me.

To explain some of things to you about this book, well for one let’s talk about Sky and Chris. So the book was first published on wattpad and there was this recurring question I was getting why did I add Chris. Like I could rolled with the whole Sky thing I mean from the introduction we all know that whether she ends up with Sky or not she is definitely going to fuċk him and the thing is they keep asking why have I built the character of Chris in so much detail. You know makes you hate Sky and Aiyana come what may.

To answer that.

Here’s the deal, I have tried to bring out parallelism. Sky to me represents the novel romanticism of men. In a world where everyone is having a crush on Christian grey, or Dominic Stone or Gideon Cross so he’s so much like them. Authoritative, dominant and mercurial. He will always cook and make gestures and everything while Chris on the other hand represents worldly love to me. Slow romance and the works. Aiyana and Chris and not together out of unreigned passion or explosive sėx. They are together because they understand each other, know each other. Chris rarely uses big words or does those huge gestures but he’s the type that stays. You see Sky and Chris are the difference between what you want and what you need. Sky being the want obviously.

So yeah I hope that answers at least that question.

Two, Sierra and Sky’s marriage. Well, that’s where I wanted to deal with empty marriages and loneliness and baggage. I don’t know why that is of great importance to talk about but it is.

Three, no neither Chris nor Sky are based on real people. I wish they were but they aren’t. But some of the scenes sėx excluded; are written from my own life. Bits and pieces of a beautiful relationship.

Also sometimes love is not enough to stay together. You’ll know which question this answer by the end of the book.

Also I am going to apologize from the beginning for this part because well I am going through shit. This boy that I thought was different turned out to be exactly like every other player ever. Although to be honest he is really bad at it. Anyways long story short thanks to NG I well don’t believe in love or romance anymore. I am so fuċkɨnġ tired that I give up. I tried writing romance but as you can see the last few chapters have been dead. I stopped writing for a while but now I am really running out of previous chapters that I wrote so now you are going to deal with problems of a break up cause I am still fuċkɨnġ sad and I’d rather not write about romance till I can at least feel enough inside to be able to write about things I wish I had.

So to all of you who don’t feel good enough this chapter is for you.

Also, I am super sorry I wrote this chapter and forgot to upload it. Thanks to that I had a chapter 52 but no 51. Well, there is no way to jam that in the middle so here's two chapters for the price of one.

Hoping I can save the glitch problem

Love,

Forlorn Shadows.

Aiyana walked into her room to find Scarlett crying. She was curled up at the center of the bed, with her face buried in the pillow as her bright pink hair fanned over with her voice bȧrėly a whisper. Aiyana walked to Scarlett without a word, her fingers reached out ran along the waves of the previously blonde hair, simply brushing it back and forth letting her cry it out.

After what felt like an eternity Scarlett stopped crying and looked up, her eyes were blood shot red and her cheeks pink and yet Aiyana thought to herself that the girl was beautiful in all her glory.

Brushing her hair back from her forehead she looked into Scarlett’s eyes and asked, “What happened?”

“What did he do?”

“Aiyana you had it right all along. Fuck them but don’t trust them. Pleasure them but don’t fall for them. Why did I not listen to you more often?”

“Because you know I am fuċkėd up.”

“No you were happy.”

“Scarlett, my love, I wasn’t happy. I was denying myself happiness, blaming it on my parents or my BPD. Thinking I don’t deserve because I am not pretty and talented. Well, fuċk that shit. I don’t care whether I do or do not deserve it. I don’t even care to know whether it lasts or not but here in this moment I know I love him. That whether he hurts me or not like a fuċkɨnġ mȧsȯċhɨst I will still hold on to him. And so I think you were right, having a relationship is less lonely. But, then we did not come here to talk about that. We came here to talk about Liam. Didn’t we?”

Scarlett let out a sigh before she started to talk, “Do you remember Francesca?”

“His ex?”

“The very same… So remember six months ago when well he started to like me he was all over the place. Because he was in a toxic on off relationship with her?”

“Yes I remember. I even told you not to date for that very reason. You didn’t listen but eh…”

“Ugh! Daniel was the worst!”

“I don’t deny that but his dɨċk wasn’t” Scarlett with a sly smile.

“What does that mean?”

“He was big…”

“How big?”

“Enough that he would make up for his lack of skills”

“Damn…”

“Well yeah… so after that he started to talk to me like a friend and we both know Daniel and I were fighting from the first week of our relationship. So, despite not telling anyone about Daniel I did talk to Liam about it. Liam back then had acting like a dɨċk and stuff about it. Only to later on confess that he and his girlfriend of 4 years and broken up. He also said he had feelings for me and stuff. I broke it off with Daniel in a few days only and I told Liam I liked him.”

“Then?”

“Please don’t tell me you fell for it.”

“Babe...”

“Right of course you did. You dated that bastard right after that!”

“Well yeah. He even said he loved me on our first date and kissed me and then well he said fuċk I said it too early and well yeah… Well to the part you don’t know he never stopped talking about his ex and everything.”

“Oh!”

“That’s not where this ends he broke up with me yesterday saying he loves her and can never leave her, so I guess I am single. I guess I wasn’t good enough for him.”

“Good enough! What the fuċk girl! He was a fuċkɨnġ bastard who used you!”

“We both know he didn’t. I just am not as amazing as Francesca. If I was pretty enough he would have stayed. I am just not good enough for him, you know. It's just that I fell in love with the wrong guy but I know the minute I talked to him it was inevitable. I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to never talk to him.

But I dont think I could help myself then,I dont think I can help myself now. Because this hurt was inevitable.This feeling was inevitable.I just wish it would end soon.”

“Which is?”

“Booze and bad decisions”

“We are going to a party aren’t we?”

“Fuck yes we are. And not just any party its Jammy’s party.”

“I am going to hate it. You hate it on normal days Aiyana why would we go?”

“Because we need to fuċk Liam out your system.”

“I… alright.”

Chapter 52

They could hear the music pound against the walls of the house from a street away as they drove. The beats getting louder as they walked to the house; it was chaos in its purest form mating with Dionysus and Aphrodite. It was beautiful. Lustful with a rawness shaded in bright colors as Scarlett took everything in.

And today as his eyes fell on the door, he saw her. His slacked posture immediately straightened. She had his full attention. She always did. Ever since they were made partners in chemistry lab. This is was before puberty had hit Jammy. Before, he was a popular swimmer that every girl wanted to date. Before, people were even nice to him. Except Aiyana. She was always nice to him.

Girls thought he was player, if only they knew what was actually in his heart. It was her. And there he was still waiting for her to start noticing him.

“Aiyana?”

“Jammy!”

“Well what a surprise. Is it my birthday?”

“Love, I can come to a party sometimes… without it having to be your birthday.”

“When was the last time that happened? 1790?”

“As a matter of fact yes. Between all the bloodshed that I spearheaded I did manage to catch a few balls with Marie Antoinette.”

“Beautiful wasn’t she? Our little Marie?”

“Yes, quite not as much as me though. My simple peasant like looks were far better than hers”

“Quit talking nerd you two!” Scarlett grunted angrily.

Both Jammy and Aiyana burst into laughter. It almost felt like old times, when they were still close.

“Alright madam. Shall fetch you two beautiful women drinks?”

Spanking Jammy’s ȧss Aiyana said, “Yes wench. Vodka for me and Whiskey for the lady”

“Did you just call me wench?” Jammy said as he raised an eyebrow in mock appall.

“And I stand by it.”

Shaking his head he headed to his kitchen to the girls a drink.

“Look at what the cat dragged in!” Natasha exclaimed as she hugged Scarlett and Aiyana.

“And good timing too. I need a beer pong buddy!”

“Still!” Aiyana exclaimed

“Alright!” Scarlett.

“Who are you up against?” Aiyana asked.

“You and Jammy. Once he shows up that is.” Natasha said.

“Ladies quit talking about how beautiful I am behind my back. I told you! I am merciful I have enough love to go around to answer all your unanswered prayers!”

“Keep dreaming Jammy”

“If I am in yours baby you’re going to wake up wet.”

“Aiyana and me though. You go with Jammy.”

“Fine by us”

Setting the vodka and whiskey down they refilled the beer cups as the ball began tossing back and forth. The first to land in was on Jammy’s side.

He chugged the beer cup down as Natasha picked up the card below it and read it out loud.

“Kiss your partner. Easy peasy.”

Jammy had just set his cup down when he was hauled by his shirt as Natasha smacked her lips against his. He let his fingers lace in Natasha’s hair cupping the back of her head as he felt her teasing fingers slide lower to cup him.

“Whoa! Guys it said kiss not make out and ditch game.” Drake shouted teasingly from the side.

Breaking the kiss Jammy shouted back, “What can I say I am just a snack.”

“If only!” Scarlett teased.

Three throws later one landed into Aiyana’s side. She held the cup up for Scarlett and whispered, “Booze and bad decisions remember?”

Scarlett downed the drink and read the card.

“Give your partner a ŀȧp dance. You’re doing it princess.”

“Come on Scarlett. I am awkward with dancing!”

“Yeah well I got a buzz.”

“Liar you’ve had only one beer! Fine but remember I am only doing this cause I love you!”

“I bet!”

Scarlett seated herself to the nearest chair as the song changed to a faster beat. Aiyana stood in front of Scarlett; she took in a few breaths before she let her hɨps move. Letting each hip rise and fall in alternate motion Aiyana’s hands begun to touch herself. They started at her head slowly moving down her neck then gently ċȧrėssing her brėȧsts with the side of her hands. Her imagination began to run wild. She imagined Chris’ hands touching her brėȧsts instead of her own. Soon, the distinct image of his body being seated in the seat formed in her mind. She bent forward to clasp her ankles before slowly sliding her fingers along her legs before seating her body on Scarlett’s ŀȧp. Lacing Scarlett’s fingers between her own she ran them along her brėȧsts, pressing them together before letting go and slowly sliding down. Turning around she straddled Scarlett and moved her brėȧsts in circular motion. Finally bending forward she placed a kiss on Scarlett’s lips and smiled. Still on Scarlett’s ŀȧp she turned her face to wink and say, “Was that hot enough boys or do you want me to continue?”

“Man I have never wanted to be Scarlett more!” Natasha shouted as she let out a laugh.

“That’s so going online…” Drake said

“Tag me!”

This time when the game resumed a crowd had formed.

Another landed in Jammy’s side.

“Spank your partner till they mȯȧn.”

Turning to face Natasha Jammy says, “Have you been a naughty girl Nat?”

Natasha leaned and slowly bit on Jammy’s lower lip before saying, “Always”

“I like this game! I am definitely playing next!” Someone shouted in the back.

“Bend over” Jammy commanded.

The way he said it, with his voice dropping a few decibels finishing it with a groan like he could bȧrėly contain himself got a lot of females around biting their lips in arousal.

Natasha bent over in the middle of the table, her ȧss jutting out, turning her head to rest her cheek against the table as she said, “Spank me daddy”

Aiyana almost choked on her vodka as she when she heard the first mȯȧn escape Natasha’s mouth. The music had been paused. Nothing but the loud sound of Jammy’s skin making contact with the denim of Natasha’s shorts could be heard. So many eyes were plastered to the scene that unfolded. The energy in the room subtly changing with each spank as hormones began to fill the air.

Finally after 10 slaps he stop, pushing aside Natasha’s hair, Jammy kissed her on her shoulder saying, “Fuck that was hot.”

Scarlett in turn whispered in Aiyana’s ear, “Don’t we know it. I would make a bad decision with him every day.”

Aiyana laughed.

Another landed on Natasha’s side.

They chugged the beer with no dare underneath this time.

Next was on Aiyana’s side.

“Lick chocolate off your opponent’s ċhėst.”

Turning to Scarlett she smiled and said, “Do we make it a ‘we thing’ or a ‘you thing’?”

“Definitely a ‘we’” Jammy had already run to get the bottle of chocolate syrup for them.

Natasha laughed and said, “I guess the pervert is excited.”

Scarlett pushed Jammy against the wall before ripping his shirt apart, exposing his muscular body while Aiyana began to squirt the sauce on her palms. Scarlett then moved back to do the same as Aiyana began to coat Jammy’s shoulders while pushing the shirt off.

“This should be fun”

“Don’t I know it?”

Aiyana and Scarlett took their own sweet time smearing the chocolate all over his ċhėst moving lower to coat his abs. Scarlett did not stop there though she dipped her fingers into the waistband of his jeans before cupping him and letting some spread over his hard dɨċk. Jammy merely reacted with a gulp. All the while Aiyana downed a cup that was mixed with 1 part vodka, 1 part tequila and 1 part whiskey.

“Finished?” Jammy asked when Scarlett was finally done smearing chocolate.

“You will when we are done with you.”

Jammy found himself being licked off by more than just Aiyana and Scarlett not that he minded. Scarlett claimed the last lick as she pulled him away to the closest bedroom, the beer pong now being continued by Natasha and her.

Two more dares down, Aiyana began to feel drunk enough to start swaying.. She decided it was definitely time to go home.