39

Ray returned to his room after finishing rehearsal that night. The matter of a heroine backing off at the last minute wasn’t a new thing. But no matter what, the show must go on. After persuading someone new with a potential to take the role, what’s left was some extra practice.

Ray entered the room and before he even closed the door… someone blocked him from doing do.

“Brother…”[1]

Ray sighed. He didn’t have the mood to entertain this junior.

“What do you want, Qaseh?”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Whether you want to act or not, that’s an individual choice. No one can force you,” replied Ray. His hand was pulling the door but it was still by that junior named Qaseh.

“I know you’re mad at me.”

Ray really hated a confrontation like this. It wouldn’t go anywhere. A person like this would say the same thing every time until you say what they want to hear. With Qaseh now, she wanted Ray to say that he wasn’t angry.

You pulled out at the last minute but I can’t be angry? No way in hell!

Ray left the door open and went towards his study table to get cigarette pack. There’s only one cure for Qaseh: apathy. She’ll know when to leave when she’s tired.

Ray sat at the end of his bed and started smoking like Qaseh wasn’t even there. Qaseh, on the other hand, thought that Ray was thinking about what should be said. After a few minutes passed and Ray still didn’t say anything, Qaseh invited herself to sit next to Ray. Ray could feel her brushing against him.

“Brother, don’t be mad…”

Before Qaseh was even able to coax him properly, the open door was suddenly slammed close because of the wind. Qaseh was shocked – and her hands automatically grabbed Ray’s arm. Heh, this kid…

Ray stood up saying that the needed to keep the cigarette pack back on the table. Qaseh stayed on the bed. When Ray turned around to dismiss her out of his room, he saw her crying.

When I ignore her, she cries. Typical!

“This is why… I pulled out… from your drama. This is why…” she said, sobbing. “I’m always disturbed. Even in your room, I’m being disturbed – look! The door suddenly slammed like that…”

That’s because of the wind, you idiot.

“You want me to accompany you back to your room?” said Khalil. In other word: when are you getting lost?

Qaseh was still sobbing. The tears coming out were quite an amount. If she took on the role a sob character, she certainly would do well. “If… I can sleep here… can I?”

Ray nearly laughed. He could smell Qaseh’s intention even from a mile. He’s faced this kind of situation plenty of time. Ray stared at Qaseh – undeniably, this kid is pretty. It’d be stupid to reject her if it’s just for a one-night stand. But what could he do, the era of Musketeer Code had passed. And Ray no longer needed to deny his true sexual orientation.

“I’ll accompany you back,” invited Ray while walking towards the door, his back facing Qasih.

“It’s because I’m a girl, right?”

Ray’s steps stopped when hearing the question from Qaseh. He turned, facing Qaseh who was still sitting on the time with a smile that seemed to be mocking him.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business…”

“What if I look like this?”

Qaseh suddenly turned into Gibbs. And a few seconds later, Ray’s room turned dark. Ray immediately went to find the doorknob – but he couldn’t find it. Ray quickly groped around the wall to find the doorknob, but it wasn’t just the doorknob… he couldn’t even feel the door. As if the room…

No longer had a door.

Ray suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder. Cold. A coldness that seeped through his clothes, his skin. A coldness that reached the bones. Ray slapped the hand away and turned to face Qaseh, or Gibbs… or anyone (wrong, anything) that was near him.

Ray saw nothing. The room was still dark. But Ray could feel the presence of something with him. The hand which held his shoulder suddenly swiped his arm and gripped it tight, strong. Ray tried getting away but to avail. The ‘thing’ pressed him to the wall and its hand slowly crept up to Ray’s neck.  Little by little, the hand started choking him. Ray could feel that the grip was strong – but strangely, Ray could still breathe. But the coldness was too scary. The bone-deep coldness made Ray shiver in his room where the fan was no even turned on.

And in a blink of an eye, the ‘thing’ disappeared. Ray’s room was bright again. Ray’s clothes were soaked with his cold sweat as he stood at the wall near the door.

The difference was that there was no longer a door.

Ray looked around his room, looking for anything else changed. Everything was the same save for the fact that the room was door-less and window-less. The wall that became the divider between Ray’s and Gibbs’ rooms now became a transparent wall – where Ray could see Gibbs on the other side.

Ray moved closer to the wall. He could see Gibbs’ every movement, but he was sure that Gibbs couldn’t see him. The transparent wall worked like a one-way mirror.

Ray saw that Gibbs had just finished showering. A towel was tied neatly on his waist, and a smaller towel was used to dry his wet hair. A relaxed smile decorated Ray’s lips – he loved seeing Gibbs’ wet hair.

Before Gibbs put on a shirt, someone on knocked on his door. Gibbs looked like he was awaiting that person’s arrival. He opened the door and smiled. Fara then entered and closed the door behind her. Fara started kissing Gibbs and he responded kindly.

I don’t need to this, whispered Ray’s heart.

But there was as if a power was forcing him to look at the scene. And Ray everything: Fara took off Gibbs’ towel, Fara pushed Gibbs to the bed and…

Gibbs’ door was knocked on again. This time, Gibbs looked as if it was unexpected (yeah, he’s having a blissfull time, right. There wouldn’t be anyone disturbing usually). Gibbs put on the towel again and this time he wore a shirt while Fara was sitting in a neutral position. Gibbs opened the door.

And someone who Ray recognised entered Gibbs’ room.

“No! Nooo!!”

Ray ran to the door – he forgot that the room no longer had one. Ray went back to the transparent wall and saw the man closed in towards Gibbs without saying anything. Gibbs looked doubtful and stood in front of Fara to protect her.

“Gibbs, get out! Get out!!” Ray yelled while punching the invisible wall. It was obvious Gibbs couldn’t hear him.

And suddenly, the man looked straight towards Ray – as if he knew that Ray watching everything.

The man smiled.

The man took out a gun from his back pocket and shot Gibbs.

“Gibbs!!”

Gibbs blood sprayed to the transparent wall separating Gibbs from Ray. Ray’s knees became weak looking at Gibbs listless body lying in his pool of blood. The man’s figure disappeared – even Fara was no longer there. There was only the dying Gibbs.

The white t-shirt he put on earlier was soaked with blood. Gibbs held the part of his stomach that was shot. On the floor, Gibbs slowly pulled his body towards the door. His face was deathly pale – showing the amount of blood lost.

“Where are you going, Gibbs?! Call someone, goddammit!” yelled Ray from the accursed room. In his instability, Ray searched every corner of the room – looking hopefully for there to be a hidden door. And in his search, Ray did not realise that he was begging in his heart…

KJ… don’t do this to me. Please…

Ray ran back to the transparent wall to look at Gibbs’ condition – and he immediately regretted his action. What he saw was a scene worse than earlier. Gibbs’ face was paler and blood was all over the floor as Gibbs dragged himself.

But there was one positive thing that happened: Gibbs looked like he heard Ray’s reminder. He tried getting his handphone that was on the table near the door. In a weak state, Gibbs called someone.

And Ray’s handphone rang.

Hands trembling, Ray answered the call. “He… hello?”

“Ray…” Gibbs was sounded like he was at the end of his life.

Ray placed his hand on the wall while watching Gibbs calling for help ‘live’. The strength in Gibbs’ voice was fading… and so was the strength within Ray.

“Help me, Ray…”

Ray closed his eyes. This is just an illusion, this is just an illusion…

But why was Gibbs’ voice so similar? And the Gibbs who was lying lethargically looked so alike? Most importantly, why was Ray feeling that everything was ripping every fiber in his body?

“Gibbs… I…”

“Ray, please… Somebody shot me. I… I’m losing a lot of blood…”

“I know!”

Ray saw Gibbs’ face became confused. “You know?”

“Yes! I… I can see you!”

Gibbs looked around. “Where are you?”

“I… I’m in my room.” Ray didn’t know why he had to explain the situation to Gibbs. He felt a sense of guilt burdening him, and he wanted Gibbs to know that he wanted to help but was unable to.

“Then come help me… Please…”

“I can’t, Gibbs. I can’t…” What should I say? My room doesn’t have a door?

Gibbs’ breaths became shorter. “Ray… please, Ray… I don’t know how long… I can…”

“Gibbs, I’ll help call the ambulance, okay?”

Ray immediately cut the call and dialled the ambulance. Ray didn’t know why he should make the call when everything was an illusion, but he couldn’t just sit down and do nothing.

His call was answered…

“Hello! I need help. There’s…”

“Ray…”

Ray looked at his handphone, and then at Gibbs. Gibbs was no longer holding the handphone but was lying down while looking at Ray.

But the voice on the other end was Gibbs’.

“Ray… why don’t you want to help me?”

Ray punched the transparent wall as hard as possible – angry. “I can’t!”

“Ray… help me, Ray… I’m really…”

And the call died. So did Gibbs. The eyes looking at Ray were now lifeless.

“Gibbs!!”

Ray woke up from his sleep. The first thing he did was switching on the light – and made sure that the room had a door. Ray sighed in relief as he opened the door and walked a step out. He inhaled the fresh air outside and sat down next to the door, outside. He couldn’t care less if people call him a weirdo.

“Hey. What are you doing outside?”

Ray looked up and saw that Gibbs was standing in front of him – as fit as a fiddle. He really felt like hugging him, but he knew that’s not possible.

“Nothing. Just taking a breather,” replied Ray.

“Even so, must it be at 3 a.m.?”

“Huh? It’s already 3?”

“What time do you think it is?”

Ray shook his head. The nightmare took 6 hours? No wonder he was tired.

“Let’s go to my room,” invited Gibbs.

Ray nodded. “Wait. I’m bringing a pack.”

Ray re-entered his room – and the door was slammed shut from the wind. In a blink of an eye, the door disappeared. Ray panicked and repeatedly punched the wall where the door was located at just a short moment ago. Ray looked at the wall dividing his and Gibbs’ room.

It had turned transparent.

Shit!

“Ray?” Gibbs’ voice was heard calling him from outside.

“Gibbs! Help open the door for me,” pleaded Ray.

“Ray? Are you changing your shirt?”

“No! No! The door is closed. I can’t open it from the inside… help open it…”

“What’s with Ray? He said he went in to get some cigarette. He even locked the door,” Gibbs was heard talking to himself outside.

“Gibbs! I didn’t lock it. Try opening it from the outside…”

“Ray! He’s not even answering,” said Gibbs.

Ray was horrified. He glared at the wall, hoping Gibbs could hear him.

“I’ll wait in my room, ok?”

“No! Gibbs! Gibbs!!”

But Ray knew his screaming was just a waste of his energy. Gibbs didn’t hear him and had already entered his room. How did Ray know? Because, again, he could see everything from his room without being able to do anything.

Immediately after Gibbs went in and sat on his bed, KJ entered.

“You’re still up?” asked KJ.

“I went to the toilet. Where were you from?”

KJ didn’t answer.

“I bet it’s a project,” said Gibbs.

Their door was suddenly knocked on. “Who’s that?” asked KJ.

“Probably Ray. He said he wanted to come. Why did you lock the door?”

“I didn’t,” said KJ, but still got up to make sure.

Before he even took a few steps, the door was opened violently. A gun shot was released – right at KJ.

KJ fell to the floor. Gibbs quickly stood up in panic. The shooter’s identity was still veiled from Ray’s room.

Another shot was released. Gibbs was shot at the same place as earlier. KJ was now lifeless. Gibbs dragged his body just like before, but this time towards the transparent wall – moving towards Ray.

With all the might he had, Gibbs slammed the invisible wall as if he was knocking on a door loudly.

“Ray!! Help!!”

Ray turned his back to the wall and closed his eyes as tight as possible as if it could stop this from happening. He took out his handphone and his heart suddenly felt like calling someone. But Ray changed his mind and typed an SMS: Help me.

And the SMS was sent to Fara.

[1] Though I think you’ve probably realised this, I’ll mention it anyway. Younger people call older male brother if their age isn’t too far apart from them. Uncle for those older fyi.