His Only Sin

"Yesha's having a very delicate pregnancy. She can't leave the bed even for our wedding," I told my lawyer over the phone and listened to his reply.

He was the one handling our marriage license and aside from that, I had asked him to do a little something extra for me too. I asked him to arrange a pre-nuptial agreement stating that even if Yesha and I were already married, she would not have any say to my finance and properties. In short, the only thing she'd gain in this marriage would be me.

"Okay. See you tomorrow," I said as I ended the call.

Staring out of the window, but seeing nothing at all, I wondered how Yesha would react to that one little document. Others who I had presented with them threw a fit refusing to sign anything. I knew I had no business doing the same to Yesha since I was the one who forced myself on her, but I still wanted to see if she'd sign or not.

Even after everything that happened, even if I had everything a man could ever wish for in this world when it came down to it, all I ever wanted was to be wanted for myself. My money may have given me security – but when it came to my heart and mind, the fact that I was rich only gave me insecurities.

Tons of them...

Tomorrow, Yesha and I would be married in her hospital bed. It wasn't a nice venue for a wedding but seeing her fragile condition, and since I wanted to be wed to her as soon as possible, we had no choice.

Looking at the clock, it's only seven in the evening. I still had time to go to the hospital and replace Jane in guarding Yesha. Actually, I had asked the hospital to provide us with two private nurses so all Jane had to do there was sit and talk to her sister.

I reached the place in thirty minutes' time and I was on my way to Yesha's room when I saw Jane, standing outside the door, talking to the doctor. I was about to greet them when I saw her worried expression and I frowned as I approached them.

"What's going on?" I asked and Jane looked visibly relieved upon seeing me and I became a little nervous. I just knew that there was something wrong.

"Adam," Jane called and I bit my lip.

Jane never called me by my name. She'd always called me Kingsley. This told me that she was distressed over something as well.

"Adam, this is Dr. Lin," she said indicating the lady doctor, and I nodded my greeting.

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"What's going on?" I asked as I searched their faces and Jane sighed, her face looking serious.

"Adam, earlier when you weren't here, Big Sis refused to eat and she's been crying nonstop," she said and my frown deepened.

"Mood swings?" I asked and the doctor shook her head.

"Sir, the patient has been like that since she was hospitalized," the doctor informed me and I looked confused.

Yesha had been hospitalized for more than a week. "What is it then and why are you only telling me this now?"

"We apologize for this but we needed time to observe her to diagnose correctly. Just like what you said, it could be very well just mood swings, but I'm afraid at this time, we can't say that it's like that anymore."

"So, what exactly are you telling me?" I found my patience getting thin but I pushed back my anger when I saw Jane's troubled expression.

I didn't want to upset her further since she was pregnant too. She reached out for my hand and I took it, giving her a squeeze for reassurance before turning my attention back to the doctor.

"Most people believe that depression comes only after giving birth. But that's wrong. It could come at the beginning too, most especially if the patient already has a history of depression either herself or in the family." Upon saying this, the doctor looked from me to Jane as if asking if there was such history.

"We had an aunt who committed suicide due to depression but with Big Sis, she'd never shown anything like that. She was always smiling," Jane said as she thought. "Wait… Well, there was this time when her best friend died from a traffic accident that Big Sis became withdrawn. But isn't that natural? They were close after all and they were supposed to go to Japan together."

"How long did it last?" the doctor inquired and Jane shook her head. "I can't remember. I was in college that time so I was busy and Big Sis went to Japan so I don't know."

"I see," the doctor nodded and sighed and I couldn't help but ask.

"That was five years ago. She came back to Korea normally so what's that got to do with her condition now?"

"A person's depression can be forgotten in time even without counseling. But if something happens which rendered the person helpless about the things in her life – for something she did or did not do which resulted to loss or perhaps she developed a lot of insecurities, those old feelings can return in a flash," the doctor explained, and I frowned as I continued to listen.

"Pregnancy makes a person very sensitive. The rapid increase of hormone levels most especially at the beginning of the pregnancy can disrupt brain chemistry and affect her mentality. Yesha is showing signs of depression which is probably triggered by recent events or past insecurities and we are worrying since the behavior she's showing can lead to possibly more serious psychological conditions."

For a moment, Jane and I were speechless absorbing the doctor's words.

"I don't understand. Yesha's fine when I visit him," I stated and the doctor nodded.

"This was what Jane and I had been talking about earlier. If you are the one with the patient, she seems to be calm and cooperative. But if you're not around, she's anxious and withdrawn. She refuses to eat and she gets restless which is not good for her. Since she's having a delicate pregnancy, her behavior can cause her to miscarry."

A cold hand touched my chest and I felt real fear for the first time.

"What should we do?" I asked.

The doctor looked thoughtful for a while before she sighed. "Mr. Kingsley, the patient's condition is delicate; we can't have her attend counseling yet since that may also upset her. The patient is emotionally dependent on you at the moment so I suggest you give time to cater to her for now so she'll be more cooperative in taking care of herself. Right now, it's more important for her to be strong physically for the baby. We'll just fix her psychological condition at a later date when she had delivered safely."