How to Avoid Debut

༺ How To Avoid Debut – 27 ༻

 

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  Jigu had left, and a few minutes later, I was barely able to get up to leave when my uncle’s face came into view. Since Jigu was the last to leave, there were no remaining participants, but instead of approaching openly, I quietly took out my cell phone and left a text.

 

  [Can we possibly cut the first version of our team’s game video?]

 

  I saw my uncle pull his vibrating phone from his pocket, checking if the text had arrived. Then he sent a very satisfying reply.

 

  [alright Jigu’s friend was late, so the PD already told us to cut it.]

 

  [It’ll almost go up in full version at midnight without any touching]

 

  Thank you, I thought to reply but stopped and went into the gift card shop. Then I found the same cake that I bought in the morning and clicked to send it to my uncle as a gift. My uncle’s eyes widened when he discovered the gift card, and after glancing at me briefly, he sent a barrage of touching emoticons.

 

  [Stop the terror]

 

  I initially laughed, but when the emoticons surpassed a hundred, I couldn’t endure it and sent a warning text. My uncle immediately lifted his finger from the screen.

 

  Finally holding my now obedient phone, I hailed a taxi as usual. The taxi driver this time seemed to like silence and sentimentality, filling the cab with depressingly gloomy music. I could slump just imagining a solitary walk on the Han River Bridge on a rainy night. I was sure that my particularly gloomy feeling after paying the fare and getting out was all because of the song.

 

  Unlocking the door and taking off my shoes, I turned on the light. Looking at the quickly brightened house, I tore off my clothes as if they were shackles and went into the bathroom. As if leaving my soul on the bed, I blankly finished my shower and lay on the bed, pulling the covers up to my head to fend off the chill that hit me. Then I carefully turned on my phone’s screen, lowered the brightness, and turned it to silent mode before putting it down.

 

  The rumors of manipulating the vote count probably still hadn’t died down, and they must have been heating up all sorts of online communities. If a new prey fell into this mess, they’d be busy biting and tearing at it. I felt an unnecessary ache in my body, so I changed positions, tossing and turning. I closed my eyes, thinking I needed to sleep for a while.

 

  When I got up, feeling stifled and lifting the covers, it was already bright outside. Seeing the sun high in the sky, I must have slept a lot. I checked my phone out of habit, stopped for a moment when I found a stack of notifications, and muttered, 

 

  “Uh…”

 

  I quickly looked at Uncle’s text and hurriedly accessed the search portal. What was setting the internet on fire now was not the story of vote-rigging but the leakage of hidden camera footage.

 

  Startled, I fumbled with my phone. Kim Seongwon had certainly said he wouldn’t appear on the broadcast because of the pressure. Most importantly, it wasn’t even the broadcast date yet. The leaked footage I hastily checked was that one. The video said to have been filmed by a passing participant.

 

  The uproar overnight was not just about one hidden camera. The testimonies of hidden victims stuck like magnets to a single video, and stories that had rapidly increased in volume had taken over all sorts of social media. It was amazing how quickly the words that had been forced and jammed down poured out.

 

  “Kim Seongwon bullying rumors, Kim Seongwon alcohol, Kim Seongwon school violence….”

 

  Looking at the search volume that had amazingly increased overnight, I slightly dropped my phone. The natural curse and fierce look came to mind naturally. I really could have been hit right there. Kim Seongwon was more than what I had imagined.

 

  What on earth had happened? Trying to calm my spinning head, I contacted my uncle.

 

  [Do you know who posted the leak?]

 

  Of course, it would have been one of the many participants who had crowded in yesterday. The text remained unanswered for over 5 minutes. Thinking that Uncle would obviously be busy with this and that, I was about to put my phone down when a late-night piled-up chat caught my eye. I clicked on the chat room with a familiar name right away.

 

  [Hyung, that video]

 

  [It’s been leakedㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ]

 

  [The internet seems to be going crazy, what should I doㅠㅠㅠㅠ]

 

  Jun, having witnessed the incident firsthand and seeing it blow up this much on the internet, must have been quite shocked as he had sent as many as 58 messages. I placated him with a few words and hurried into the portal site. What would have to be done for a video to explode like this?

 

  I knew rumors were rampant on the internet, but without some evidence to back them up, they couldn’t have spread this big. The baseless bullying rumors would not have reached the real-time search trends, after all. Despite the fact that these events had erupted in the early morning, Kim Seongwon was already the third most searched term. Since he was an ordinary person without an agency, it was clear that he couldn’t make any official statements.

 

  I couldn’t help but be surprised at the drastic turn of events that were far more intense than I could have imagined. When I first heard about the leak, I thought it was a taste of his own medicine, some sort of karmic retribution. But this was a past that could almost bury him.

 

  The third mission was due to start tomorrow. I couldn’t get in touch with my uncle, and the controversy had already erupted. There was nothing I could do in this situation. I quietly put my phone down and tapped the screen twice. My tapping lit up the screen, showing that it was only 11 AM. I couldn’t sleep because I had already slept a lot, and there was nothing to do. I just kept tapping my fingernails and finally lay back down again.

 

  A lot happened while I was staring at the ceiling and having some meditative time. As the victims began to emerge, the rumors of school bullying were almost confirmed, and the outcry for his departure grew louder. The reaction of the netizens trying to dig into his home, based on rumors that he had connections, was frightfully intense.

 

  I got a call from my uncle exactly five hours later, when the sun, which had been high in the sky, had slightly tilted.

 

– Kim Seongwon is leaving.

 

  The sound that came as soon as I answered the phone was shocking in itself. He always did things his own way, and I never thought he would simply step down like this. I wanted to ask more, but for some reason, I couldn’t speak, and my uncle took the initiative.

 

– But I don’t know what to say about this, his parents requested this unilaterally.

 

  “Parents?”

  

– They said he had to come in person, and that they would pay for the penalty for leaving early and compensation for damages, so don’t worry about his opinion and just remove him. They even sent a person over to show how determined they were.

 

  They kicked up such a fuss to the show director that I was scared too. They said they would also pay for damages caused to the program’s image.

 

  My uncle’s voice was still trembling, as if he was still in the midst of the situation. Kim Seongwon seemed like he would live as he pleased, not caring about anyone else in the world. But it appeared that his parents’ pressure was stronger than expected. There was only one plausible reason for them to urge his withdrawal so hastily.

 

– Right now, the netizens are causing a ruckus trying to dig into their family…

 

  “But nothing definite has come out yet, right?”

 

– There’s more than one Kim family, right? Nothing’s out yet. They seem to be doing their best to nip this in the bud as quickly as possible. I tried to contact Kim Seongwon directly, but his phone was turned off.

 

  “So what do we do?”

 

– For now, it would be easier to make him leave, but he’s such a hot topic…

 

  My uncle spoke in a tired voice, and a sound that seemed like scratching his head came through the phone.

 

-But what’s with the video? Who spread it? Even the angle is strange.

 

  “A passing participant took it,” I replied.

 

-Sigh, they shot it through a crack in the door?

 

  “It seems that the other participants had deeper grudges than I thought……”

 

  My voice gradually slowed down without my realizing it. There were too many newly discovered truths that were much heavier than just dismissing them as mere rumors.

 

-Well, it was bound to blow up at some point. Just imagine if he had debuted on our program as he was and then it blew up. …Sigh. It’s better this way, I suppose.

 

  My uncle let out a pained groan, as if the thought alone was painful.

 

-That kid is a walking time bomb. Even if he had blown up with some sort of attitude controversy while active, he wouldn’t have cared.

 

  My uncle’s words were undoubtedly correct. Kim Seongwon was indeed a walking time bomb, not caring at all about others’ views or the wounds he might inflict on others.

 

  ‘Even after experiencing all sorts of things and struggling to quit, I couldn’t give up.’

 

  Jigu had spoken in a sorrow-filled voice, saying he couldn’t bear to give up. In that past, there was Kim Seongwon as well. And not long after saying so, he had cried.

 

  The voices kept echoing confusingly in my ears, and the situation was reenacted. The words and sobs I had heard just once were etched deeply in my memory, repeatedly asserting their presence in my mind. I kept thinking incessantly until, suddenly startled, I quickly closed my mouth and buried myself in the blankets.

 

  * * *

 

  I woke to the sound of the bell in the evening. Looking at the notification bar, it seemed that Jun had replied to my KakaoTalk message, but I first had to handle the incoming call. I had a brief staring contest with an unsaved number before finally pressing the call button.

 

  “Hello?”

 

-You’re the one who spread the video.

 

  A confident, low voice came from the other end. They only shared my KakaoTalk ID, so how did they know my phone number? My mind snapped to attention, and I almost let out an inexplicable hollow laugh. I cleared my tightened throat with two light coughs and responded.

 

  “How did you know my phone number?”

 

-Is it hard to find out your number?

 

  “I won’t ask about the route for now.”

 

-So it’s you who posted it, right?

 

  Kim Seongwon answered in an angry voice at my response.

 

  “I wasn’t the one who took the picture since I was there. And I didn’t post it either.”

 

-If not you, then who? You did it on purpose to screw me over.

 

  “No, I didn’t. It was part of the scenario given by the writers.”

 

  After I calmly explained the exact facts, there was a brief silence, followed by harsh words.

 

-So now that I’m leaving, you must be happy. You guys can figure it out amongst yourselves.

 

  “Is your departure confirmed?”

 

-They usually don’t care what nonsense I do, but now they’re worried it will get back to the family.

 

  Kim Seongwon mumbled for a while, as if speaking to his parents. It seemed like he was alone, given the quiet surroundings. Forgetting why he had called, Kim Seongwon continued his life’s lament, peppered with all sorts of vulgar language.

 

-They tell me to live on my own even when I beg for attention, but then they block me when I do live on my own. What’s that about?

 

  After hearing a few words, I quickly realized what was going on. Kim Seongwon’s behavior, as if he wanted understanding, was because of his parents. A sigh escaped me as I grasped that simple fact. Even if he wanted attention, he had gone too far.

 

  “So, you assaulted people and created social outcasts?”

 

-I can stop it all anyway, so there’s no need to care about appearances.

 

  Given that he did not deny it, it appeared to be true. Ultimately, the talk of school violence was real. It was difficult to discern rumors from facts on social media, but now that I had the admission from the party involved, it was confirmed.

 

  “What kind of behavior is it to harm others just to get your parents’ attention?”

 

  Although it was none of my business, I said it firmly. After all, it seemed like Kim Seongwon would never call me again after this conversation.

 

-You really like to play the teacher, don’t you?

 

  He had lamented his life to me a lot, but at the slightest reprimand, he cut me off as if he didn’t want to hear it. His quick response left me without anything more to say. I had realized right away that telling him to hold onto his phone and reflect on his actions a hundred times would be futile.

 

-You should have told me not to do it from the beginning.

 

  “You’re old enough to distinguish right from wrong on your own, aren’t you?”

 

-…….

 

  The conversation then fell into prolonged silence. I wasn’t sure whether he was thinking or cursing at me, but I chose to believe it was the former. If it were the latter, Kim Seongwon’s character would have led him to verbalize it.

 

  I wanted to say something more, but I couldn’t. The call was cut off, and I had no intention of calling back. I felt like I had meddled unnecessarily. I should have just hung up as soon as I answered.

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