I Can Still Salvage It

Tears still lingered in the corners of Shen Mian’s eyes. As he opened his eyes, they slid down his face and left a wet mark on the snow-white pillow.

He heard the words from 007, and although his brain understood their meaning, his emotions remained trapped in the dream of separation and parting, leaving him feeling sad and confused.

Pei Zhiyi’s hand began to tremble slightly.

He wasn’t calm at all, but he still asked 007 with utmost rationality, “Does a Heartbeat Value of 100 mean that we have completed the final mission?”

In a rare moment, 007 chuckled softly, and its electronic voice took on a hint of human touch.

“Congratulations to Host Shen Mian and Host Pei Zhiyi for completing the final mission. The store will open in three days. Please exchange the items you need.”

“I’ll go write the summary report now. Logging off.”

After saying those words, 007 went offline, appearing cold and ruthless. However, Shen Mian and Pei Zhiyi saw a line of fluorescent digits—1000—appear on the back of their hands.

The numbers disappeared after just a second, but they had seen them clearly.

A gentle breeze blew outside, indicating the arrival of spring. Although the remnants of winter’s chill still lingered, the thin ice on the lake had melted away, and the winter jasmine under the window just revealed its soft goose-yellow petals.

Shen Mian gently held Pei Zhiyi’s hand.

In the dream, he had been unable to hold Pei Zhiyi’s hand no matter how many times he reached out. His hand would always pass through Pei Zhiyi’s body.

That feeling was truly terrible.

He felt abandoned in a corner of the world, as if he had never existed.

Now, as his palm touched Pei Zhiyi’s, his wandering heart finally found a place to rest.

He lifted his gaze and saw that even the usually composed Pei Zhiyi had tears streaming down his face.

Shen Mian smiled. “Brother, won’t you give me a kiss?”

Pei Zhiyi always fulfilled his every wish.

He bent down and kissed Shen Mian on the forehead, then on the tip of his nose, and finally, with a trembling touch, on his lips.

Shen Mian could feel Pei Zhiyi’s tears falling onto his face. He held Pei Zhiyi’s back, embracing him tighter and tighter, gripping his clothes tightly.

Faint voices and the scent of disinfectant permeated the air outside the window, and everything appeared bleak in white.

That was a hospital, where separation and parting played out every day. The walls there had heard more prayers than any church.

Before Shen Mian woke up, Pei Zhiyi was also one of those praying.

But now, his nightmare had finally come to an end.

Pei Zhiyi had taken care of Shen Mian for a whole day and night without closing his eyes, yet he wasn’t tired.

Shen Mian only realized that he was unconscious for a whole day.

“Auntie and Uncle haven’t slept either. I just convinced them to rest for a while,” Pei Zhiyi said. “My mother has gone back home for now, but she’ll come back in the afternoon.”

Shen Mian leaned against Pei Zhiyi’s chest, burying his head in Pei Zhiyi’s shoulder. He was like a lost puppy that had finally returned to familiar arms and refused to leave for even a single moment.

His parents didn’t know the reason behind his fainting, but Pei Zhiyi certainly did.

He asked Pei Zhiyi in a low voice, “Brother, were you scared when I fainted? Scared that I wouldn’t wake up again?”

Only now did he dare to ask Pei Zhiyi.

Pei Zhiyi didn’t put up a strong front; instead, he admitted, “Yes, I’ve never been so scared in my life. I even thought, what if we couldn’t exchange the points in the end? I should immediately ask my grandfather to find the best doctor for you. If domestic treatment isn’t enough, we’ll go abroad. No matter what, I want to keep you by my side.”

He had never told Shen Mian about those thoughts before because it seemed that speaking them out loud would make them more likely to come true. So, he had kept them buried in his heart.

“And what I’m most afraid of… is you really not wanting me anymore,” he whispered.

Shen Mian curled up in Pei Zhiyi’s embrace, listening to the pounding of Pei Zhiyi’s heart. It beat rapidly, thumping against his eardrums.

Pei Zhiyi always appeared strong before him.

Although he was only a few months older, as an older brother, Pei Zhiyi always played the role of a mature and composed figure, seemingly unfazed by anything.

Only in moments like this would he reveal his vulnerability to Shen Mian and admit that he, too, was scared.

Shen Mian clumsily held onto Pei Zhiyi.

“Brother, do you know why my Heartbeat Value became 100?” Pei Zhiyi shook his head.

“It’s because I had a very terrifying dream. I dreamt that we had never met, that you didn’t know me and didn’t love me. I couldn’t even leave a trace in your life.” Although he knew it was just a dream, there was still a slight tremor in Shen Mian’s voice. “This dream was so frightening, but because of this dream, I realized that I love you more than I imagined. Because I really don’t want to give you to someone else.”

He was never a possessive person. Since childhood, he was even willing to share his favorite toys with others.

But with Pei Zhiyi… He was determined to have him for himself, completely and unreasonably possessive.

“You are mine,” Shen Mian rarely displayed such dominance. He looked into Pei Zhiyi’s eyes and said, “You’ve engraved yourself in my heart, and you can only belong to me.”

And Pei Zhiyi kissed him.

“I am yours.”

Of course, he belonged to Shen Mian.

He had already engraved the beloved rose in his heart, nourishing it with the blood pumping through his heart. If that rose were to wither, how could his heart continue to beat?

…

Because he hadn’t slept the entire day, Pei Zhiyi eventually fell asleep while talking with Shen Mian. However, Shen Mian, having slept for too long, wasn’t at all tired.

He continued to hold Pei Zhiyi’s hand, and with his other hand, he gently stroked the space between Pei Zhiyi’s eyebrows. Even though he was asleep, Pei Zhiyi still looked restless. Shen Mian didn’t know how to make Pei Zhiyi feel secure, so he could only try his best to make him aware that he was right here, not going anywhere.

Over an hour later, the door to his hospital room was quietly pushed open by a crack.

Su Ying and Shen Changhe stood outside together.

They had come to see if Shen Mian had woken up, but they immediately saw the scene of Pei Zhiyi embracing Shen Mian.

Shen Mian didn’t notice them, and the two of them didn’t immediately come in. They stood there for a while, silently peering inside before slowly pushing open the door.

Shen Mian was startled but afraid of waking Pei Zhiyi, so he didn’t sit up.

The three of them silently exchanged glances in the hospital room for a while.

But in the end, Su Ying and Shen Changhe just sat on the chairs next to Shen Mian’s bed. Only having slept for two hours, Su Ying looked much more exhausted than usual, as did Shen Changhe.

Shen Mian sat up nervously, looking at them and not knowing what to say. All he could manage was a hesitant “Dad, Mom.”

Su Ying touched his forehead and asked, “Are you feeling okay? The doctor said you’re fine, but if there’s anything bothering you, you must speak up.”

Shen Mian quickly nodded his head. “I’m okay.”

“You scared us,” Shen Changhe looked at him, his voice filled with the lingering fear of a close call. “You suddenly collapsed and didn’t wake up for so long.”

Shen Mian felt even more guilty. “I’m sorry…”

But Shen Changhe and Su Ying didn’t want to hear his apologies at all.

Fainting wasn’t something he did willingly, so why did he need to apologize for it?

If it were before, Shen Mian would have already snuggled up to them, seeking their comfort. But now, he felt like a deeply remorseful sinner, apologizing for everything.

Su Ying stroked Shen Mian’s face and glanced at Pei Zhiyi sleeping next to him. She whispered, “Zhiyi has been by your side the whole time, and he’s exhausted too. When I was watching him, I couldn’t help but think that even if you were in a relationship with someone else, you wouldn’t meet someone like Zhiyi again, would you? Who else could love you as much as Zhiyi does?”

Suddenly, Shen Mian became nervous again, realizing that his parents wanted to talk about their coming out.

Su Ying’s voice was low, but because the room was so quiet, it became clear.

She said, “Compared to Zhiyi, I’m actually more worried about you. Shen Mian, have you really thought it through? Do you know what it means to be in a relationship with Zhiyi? If you two don’t make it to the end, your innocent brotherly bond with Zhiyi will also be lost. Can you really handle all of this?”

Shen Mian nodded solemnly.

He smiled at Su Ying, his face still pale, and faint traces of tears were visible under the sunlight.

He said, “Mom, I’ve already thought about all of this before confessing to Zhiyi. But compared to all the terrifying uncertainties, I’m more afraid of losing him.”

Su Ying and Shen Changhe’s hands clasped tighter together.

Although they had already expected that answer, hearing it firsthand still brought a touch of melancholy.

“Then it’s up to you two,” Su Ying also smiled at Shen Mian, tears glistening in her eyes but her voice gentle. “As parents, how much can we give you? We can’t subject you to the pain caused by your family before you have even experienced the trials of the outside world.”

She pretended to be lighthearted and said to Shen Mian, “Remember to let Zhiyi have breakfast when he wakes up. After all, you’re already boyfriends, don’t always rely on others to take care of you.”

After saying those words, tears streamed down her eyes.

In truth, she was very afraid, afraid that the road ahead for those two children would be difficult.

But she was even more afraid that Shen Mian and Pei Zhiyi wouldn’t be happy.

Shen Mian couldn’t hold back any longer. Just a moment ago, he had pretended to be calm and assured his parents, but now he threw himself into Su Ying’s embrace and burst into tears.

Shen Changhe patted his son’s back. He didn’t have much to say, just sighed.

…

It was in the midst of that crying that Pei Zhiyi woke up.