I Don’t Want This Reincarnation

I forgot how to answer for a moment and just stared.

“Why are you so surprised? Did you think I didn’t know?”

“……”

“That’s stupid, Han Yi-gyeol.”

With those words, Cheon Sa-yeon let me go. I raised my upper body and rubbed my scratchy sore throat, asking, “…when did you notice?”

No matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t figure it out. Until now, while dealing with Cheon Sa-yeon, I never talked about my sister…

“If you thought your sister was still alive, Han Yi-gyeol—” he threw the red jacket he was wearing at me “—you would’ve asked for her in return.”

“Ah…”

“You didn’t cry or beg to see her like you used to.”

Then I remembered the conversation I had with Cheon Sa-yeon before entering the gate. What did I say to Cheon Sa-yeon who asked what I wanted in return?

「Please bring me two low-level items that can be obtained from inside that gate.」

Two low-level items. Immediately after answering that, I’d even realized that I made a mistake.

“Hah…”

As Cheon Sa-yeon said, I was really stupid.

The existence of a younger sister was the most important thing to escape from Cheon Sa-yeon. The more I seemed to believe that my sister was alive, the more Cheon Sa-yeon would mistake her as my leash.

I ruined my plan myself. I should’ve considered that Han Yi-gyeol was obsessed with his only blood relative left, his sister. It was something that those who never had a family wouldn’t understand.

It was a complete defeat. I sighed and lifted my staggering body.

“Cheon Sa-yeon.”

In terms of a card game, I was caught playing Joker, but it was still too early to give up. I had a lot of cards left.

“I admit, I lost.” It was at this time I purposely gave him a smirk. “But I also have a temper, so I don’t like being dragged around meekly, okay?”

“Hmm. I thought you’d be harder to handle…”

Cheon Sa-yeon looked at me with glittering eyes as if interested in my attitude.

“I will cooperate with you until the gate is cleared. I don’t know why an SS-rank would need an A-rank’s cooperation to deal with the boss monster.”

I thought a lot in a short moment. Should I just throw it all away and run away? Anyway, it was a brief relationship. I felt sorry for them, but they weren’t important enough to me to suffocatingly live with no freedom.

“But that’s all. I have no intention of being swayed by you even when I get out of the gate.”

But in the end, this was the path I took.

“Min Ah-rin and Kim Woo-jin will be my new leash?”

I maintained my smile as I narrowed my eyes.

“Don’t be ridiculous. Those people, including my sister, can never be my leash.”

In the novel, Han Yi-gyeol was one of many supporting characters. A character that appeared less than 10 times; his age was never mentioned.

“If my sister died and Min Ah-rin and Kim Woo-jin also died, do you think I would stay with you?”

Ever since I woke up in Han Yi-gyeol’s body, I did not bother to find out what kind of life Han Yi-gyeol lived.

Why his sister died, why he loved Cheon Sa-yeon enough to give his life to him, how lonely he must have been by himself… I was too scared to face the past that resembled me.

“Do your best and try, Cheon Sa-yeon.”

But now I wanted to know. I had to know everything about Han Yi-gyeol if I didn’t want to make the same mistake.

“My little sister was the only leash you had on me.”

At those words, Cheon Sa-yeon, who was looking at me with his eyes slightly wide open, pulled up his lips and started to laugh.

“Haha, really…” Cheon Sa-yeon, who was bent at his waist from laughing, looked somewhat relieved. “Okay. I know for sure that she didn’t intervene.”

Cheon Sa-yeon took the red jacket that I had thrown off, dusted the sand off, and put it on my shoulders.

“Let me say something too.”

“……?”

“I see your point*. Even still, I was looking forward to seeing you cry. It’s quite a shame.”

“You act like you’ve got me all figured out, how arrogant** (꼴좋네).”

“That’s right. Really…”

Cheon Sa-yeon, who had been silent for a while without continuing his words, spoke again. “It’s a mistake only beginners make, allowing others to take advantage of them just because their weakness was found.”

What nonsense all he was talking about suddenly. I raised my eyebrows.

“You are surprisingly well-versed in the business.”

“Are you going to keep talking nonsense?” I asked, roughly removing Cheon Sa-yeon’s hand on my shoulder. What kind of business was Han Yi-gyeol involved in?

Cheon Sa-yeon, who was smiling with an unknown expression, pointed back and said, “The boss monster is over there.”

“That’s… the building with the gate’s exit?”

Beyond the hazy sandstorm, I could see the building that was our original destination.

“I’ll explain the rest as we go.”

* * *

Lilith (릴리스). Cheon Sa-yeon called the boss monster Lilith.

“The more human-like the monster, the higher the grade.”

As the building got closer, the sandstorm became stronger. As I walked forward using the red jacket, which was probably hundreds of millions of dollars, as a shield, I asked, “Why Lilith?”

“Because ‘it’ is a woman.”

So, what does the name ‘Lilith’ have to do with it?

Cheon Sa-yeon continued to explain as he stared sullenly, “Because Lilith is the representative female demon that targets humans. It started out as a pun, but it’s actually quite a match.”

Demon? I tilted my head, not understanding, as we arrived at the building that seemed far away.

Through the sandstorm, we could only see the shape of it, so it was called a ‘building’, but when I arrived, it was more a castle than a building. Beyond the collapsed wall, there was a staircase leading down to the basement and old feathered spears everywhere.

“Is there another way down?”

“Of course.”

Cheon Sa-yeon lifted his sword and cut his hand without hesitation. Without treatment, new wounds appeared on his tattered palms.

Tuduk, tuk.

His palm, cut by the S-class sword, was dripping blood nonstop. Cheon Sa-yeon, who sprinkled blood on his sword, took the lead and walked without any change in expression.

“Follow me from behind.”

The underground stairs without a single point of light were subtly lit by the fire burning on the sword. A long, seemingly endless staircase continued down.

Unlike the ground floor, which was filled with dry sand, the basement was filled with damp and unpleasant air. The sound of dripping water could be heard, and the stairway I stepped on was getting more and more muddy. Cheon Sa-yeon and I just went down the stairs without saying a word for a while.

It was dark everywhere, so I couldn’t tell how far down I had come. Unlike me, who carefully walked down the stairs and looked around, Cheon Sa-yeon looked very familiar with this place itself.

“You know, don’t you?” I asked, pointing at the rough wall. “How to clear this gate.”

It had been a few minutes since I came underground. No, it had been hours… I didn’t know. I wiped the cold sweat running down my chin.

“Perhaps.”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

Cheon Sa-yeon’s profile, with shadow fluttering in the red light, gave off a somewhat dangerous atmosphere. Cheon Sa-yeon, whose face was half covered in darkness, said, “Isn’t it the same for you ? I haven’t heard how you know the existence of the boss monster yet.”

“Why didn’t you tell the others? About the sand…”

My eyes shook slightly. I put my hand on my forehead and didn’t stop talking.

“If you told me, I could’ve taken action sooner…”

“Is that so?” Cheon Sa-yeon answered in a calm tone as if he was taking a walk. “If I told them, they would’ve been confused. They would’ve been scared. After that, they would have divided, fought, and acted individually. And then they’d be eaten by the sand.”

“That—it’s of course because they didn’t know it was a ranked gate…”

“Even if I announced in advance that it was an SS-grade gate and recruited applicants, nothing would change. Monsters would still appear where they appeared and things would go the same way. It would only add to the unnecessary fuss.”

I heard a harsh breath from somewhere. I turned my head around, but all I could see was darkness. Who was breathing? I put more strength to my trembling legs.

“Haah, hah, how are you… so sure…”

My trembling legs stepped on the stairs incorrectly and I stumbled heavily. I closed my eyes as my body collapsed helplessly without being able to hold out.

“I’ll tell you how I’m so sure, Han Yi-gyeol.”

Instead of the pain of rolling down the stairs, what came to me was the cool scent I had smelled before. Cheon Sa-yeon hugged my limp body like I was a child.

“Because I’ve already done it. A lot. Then you’d see the things you’ve said are meaningless”

“Ugh, what…”

“For example, because this basement is under the influence of the boss monster, A-ranks can’t stand it.”

I muttered curses even through my hazy consciousness. What is with this bastard?

“If I let you know in advance, your mind would break down faster.”

“Hah… Then I’d rather…”

“It’s more dangerous out there. From the moment we entered the basement, monsters have been flocking towards this place. To protect the boss.”

Then what were you going to do? I managed to open my eyes and stared at Cheon Sa-yeon.

“I can’t leave you, so I have to take you with me. What do you think I should do?”

“Fucking… Shut up and quickly…”

It was very annoying that he knew what to do and was deliberately messing around. I was having a hard time, but this guy…

“Alright, alright.” Cheon Sa-yeon clasped my sweat-soaked left hand and held it tightly. “Even if it hurts, bear with it. It’s my first time doing it, so I don’t know if I’ll do it right.”

“What? Wait…”

With a tingling sensation in the palm of my hand, something slowly began to creep in. I twisted my body instinctively to escape from the dark, heavy, and cold energy that I couldn’t compare to anything.

“Heuh, ah…!”

From the palm of my hand to my heart, Cheon Sa-yeon energy engulfed me like fire. Chills ran up my spine as I shook uncontrollably.

“N-no… stop!”

“Hold on.”

“Uh, ugh! Huurgh…!”

I plunged into Cheon Sa-yeon’s arms and closed my eyes tightly. It’s hot. Stop. It’s weird. I felt like I was about to lose my mind at any moment at the strange sensation.

“Just a little more.”

Whether it was true that it was the first time he tried it, Cheon Sa-yeon also frowned and focused on pushing his energy. Energy poured out once more with the palm of his hand. My back twisted again.

My energy, which had gathered in my heart and was wary of Cheon Sa-yeon’s energy, was gradually pushed back by the momentum. Cheon Sa-yeon’s muddy, strong energy enveloped my energy and heart like a shield.

“SS-ranks are said to be able to share their energy… It’s really working.”

“Haah, huh, ugh…”

The pain subsided as the sharp energy subsided. I let out a rough breath and got out of Cheon Sa-yeon’s arms.

“Fuck… Don’t ever do that again.”

My body, which had been limp as if I was drunk, became normal and my mind was refreshed, but it was an experience I never wanted to go through again.

When I bared my teeth warily, Cheon Sa-yeon said in a light voice, “But it’s not that bad, is it?”

Come to think of it… I checked my heart. The amount of energy and strength had improved tremendously. Was this like temporarily being S-rank? I was conflicted for a while, but my mind did not change.

“There won’t be a second time.”

At my answer, Cheon Sa-yeon looked disappointed. I didn’t know why he was disappointed. As I put on the dropped jacket again, I said, “What are you doing? Lead the way.”

Cheon Sa-yeon replied with a teasing tone, “As you wish.”