I Raised Him Modestly, But He Came Back Obsessed With Me

“Thank you for the food.”1

Ben emptied the soup from the plate and put the spoon down. It was the only instant that I served the largest dish in the house. Unlike his bowl, more than half of the soup remained in the bowl placed in front of Chersenia. She wasn’t that hungry because she had breakfast.

Ben, who ate neatly the evenly cut baguette, still seemed like he wasn’t eating enough. Chersenia pushed four pieces of her baguette in front of him, who said, “Oh, no. It’s okay.” Ben did not take his eyes off the baguette while saying so. I guess he hasn’t eaten properly.

“My stomach is full. Please help me out. I can’t leave any food to waste.”

Chersenia gradually knew more about Ben. One of them was to be honest. ‘If you still look hungry, eat more’, never eat. I don’t need it anymore. I don’t care if you eat or throw away. I had to accept this nuance to accept it. Perhaps during his slavery, he couldn’t claim things as his own, so it seemed like a hard habit to break.

Ben looked alternatively between baguettes and Chersenia, who noticed this. She nodded as to say that it’s really okay for him to eat.

“Then……. Thank you.”

He stretched out carefully and picked up the baguette. Chersenia rose from the seat. Obviously, when she put the soup, she noticed that the soup was still in the pot. If he only eats the baguette, he won’t be able to get enough of it, so she needs to take more soup for him. She grabbed his empty bowl and headed to a pot that was still smoking. The soup in the pot was reduced to less than half the amount left over in the morning.

‘Well, it’s good that he eats well.’

She thought it was better because the weather would make it even worse after today. She scrapes the pot until it shows the bottom with a ladle and places it in front of Ben.

“Oh, thank you……..”

His voice, saying thank you, trembled slightly. Ben looked at the soup, again smoking in front of the table. His tears seemed to have formed. He doesn’t remember when was the last time he had a warm meal like today. Sometimes the food served was hardened bread. The portion given to him was not enough, so even when he ate it, he was always hungry. He ate the wet bread in the rain when it rained outside without a roof, and would eat the half frozen bread when it snowed.

Even if he filled his hungry stomach with insufficient food, he couldn’t afford to have any desire for more food. Ben shook the soup and took it to his mouth. If he didn’t put the food in his mouth right now, it seemed like a cry would burst out. His warm eyes greeted the warmth of the cozy cabin and the food that melts his heart.2

“Eat slowly.”

Chersenia sat back across from him. The soup that was boiled in the morning would have been a little salty to boil again, but he was emptying the soup and bread without saying anything. Just looking at what he is eating now, it seems like he knows what it means to be full.

“Sorry, I eat too much… .”

Ben said with his head bowed down. He didn’t want Chersenia to see the tears visible on his face.

“If the food isn’t finished today, I have to throw it away.”

She shrugged as if it didn’t matter. It was also true, and she didn’t want to make Ben worry that she wouldn’t even give a dog something to eat. She was a little pleased to be more accustomed to Chersenia’s body and to eat together rather than alone for the first time. The long meal was over after Ben ate two bowls of soup and eight slices of baguette.

***

It’s been three days since Ben came home.

*Clank.*

“Oh! Sorry, sorry!”

From the morning, the bowl broke steadily and greeted Chersenia as she entered the kitchen.

“Just let it go.”

She is not angry anymore. She had a lot of dishes. It has been three days since Ben stayed at her home, but there were already four plates that Ben broke.

If you add up now, 5 pieces. She sighed deep inside. Ben doesn’t leave the living room.

“I just wanted to help… … .”

“Yes, staying there helps me.”

It was not that I didn’t know his mind. The problem was to clean the things that he touched. Chersenia took the dustpan and broom under the window and headed to the kitchen.

“I’ll do it!”

She gave the cleaning tools to Ben’s hand as she was amazed. If I didn’t even let you clean it, it was clear that you would only look down all day. Ben was always very nervous without a job. He was not such a slave that nobles play with at home. He said that he had been exploited to construct and repair the luxurious space of the nobles.

Naturally, slaves who belonged to the nobility were not paid. Furthermore, these slaves died of malnutrition because they couldn’t even eat on time. In the construction sites they would be called with, hey, you, there, this bastard, that bastard, and there was no reason to write a name for them. If they do something even a little sloppy, they can be beaten, and when the work is over and there is no need for more labor, they will be sold back to the slave market. It was also because of that, that they have the habit to eat fast. Somehow, they had to eat the meal provided only once a day. So, it was a habit to eat a lot at once when Ben was there.

“Ah… .”

In a short moan, Chersenia’s head turned. When she handed the broom over to clean the broken plate, she saw Ben was holding his bloody finger.1

“Are you okay?”

All you have to do is sweep and clean it, but why is your finger cut? There is no such thing that is more sloppy than this boy.

Though I thought so, I became worried and approached Ben.

“Sorry, sorry… … … .”

Ben panicked and quickly hid his bloody hand. I wouldn’t have any other wish other than to not hear of his apology even just for a day. Chersenia pointed at her forehead, which was frowning.

“Why are you injured? Don’t be sorry.”

Ben’s apology was a habit. Even if I said he didn’t have to apologize, it didn’t fix it easily. Chersenia stole the broomstick in Ben’s hand. I almost would have seen the blood on the other hand, which he had left.

“Give it to me, I’ll do it.”

“Oh, no. Chersenia, I… !”

“Ben. I say I’ll do it.”

“Yes, I’m sorry…”

Ben stepped back and Chersenia swept the pieces of plates scattered on the floor.

Ben, as clumsy as he is, scrubbed the floor more carefully once more to be stabbed by a fragment he couldn’t find. He must have missed his motivation because whenever he tried to do something, an error would occur. Chersenia is grateful for his help, but wherever he goes, there’s always the sound of breaking and cracking. Edward scissorhand was the best match for him. The pieces collected in the dustpan were shaken off in the trash. As Chersenia moved to get the cleaning tools in place, Ben followed.

“Go and sit. I’ll apply it right away.”

“Okay…..”

He sat down on the table chair, hanging his shoulders down. She immediately took the medicine box and sat in front of Ben.

“Please give me your hand.”

Ben reached out the hand he was hiding. The red blood was engulfed in the long cut on the index finger. She held his hand together for treatment. Then Ben flinched and trembled. Be it flinching and surprised is his specialty, Chersenia, did not care and put disinfectant on his hands.

“Uh……. it stings, doesn’t it?

I don’t know why I feel itchy when I see a disinfectant digging through the open flesh. Chersenia was frowning so much when she disinfected the wound.

“No, I’m fine. I’m sorry, Chersenia….”

Ben stared at her, still treating his wounds. The skin under her eyelashes was almost transparent because it was so white. Her red lips, which were slightly open as she was concentrating, looked thick and appealing. Her red and long hair seemed so fluttery as to scatter, fading between his fingers. She was a beautiful person no matter how much he looked at her.

Maybe that’s why he kept making mistakes when he stood by Chersenia.

‘I wanted to do well, but I just wanted to show you how good I am, but I don’t know why I keep getting nervous when I’m with her.’

‘Ha……’

Ben sighed inwardly. I wanted to be any help to her, but I was upset that it wasn’t as good as I thought it would be.

“Just apply the medicine and it’s done. “

After the disinfection, Chersenia was carefully applying the medicine to treat the wound. Ben’s eyelashes trembled at the touch of his heart. When he saw her treating him with only her focusing on his wound, he felt like his heart was wavering. 1

It was the first time in his life to have a person who worries about his injury as if it’s his or her own. The warmth that he felt for the first time made Ben feel emotional several times in a day.1

Her hands were always warm. Her eyes and hands were so warm that he almost cried. She was like a ray of sunshine in his life full of despair. Chersenia blew her mouth towards the wound so that the disinfectant would permeate well. Ben wriggled his hand in a numbness in her breath.

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“Why? Does it hurt?”

“Oh, no. Nothing.”

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Ben waved his head and answered. Unlike his words, however, he felt a fever rise all over his body and blood circulates rapidly below. Ben’s face was slightly distorted by unknown symptoms. Chersenia looked at Ben’s two red cheeks and thought, “Is it just because the wound stings?” and passed that without much thought. The treatment was completed and the bandage was neatly attached.1

“Thank you, really.”

Ben hurried to the drawer with his used medicine box. It was necessary to cool down the heat a little. Chersenia stared at Ben’s back as he was running away.+

‘Something’s changed..’