I'd Give Up The World For You

Silas had been working on the plan to overthrow the king for half the time Blaze had and knew they had planned everything down to the last detail but was still surprised how easily they were able to take over the castle. He attributed their victory largely to the wind mages assigned to each team. 

More surprising was that when he finally ran into his friend sitting on the throne that he didn't look happy. Blaze didn't seem excited or triumphant either. 

His posture was as rigid and proper as ever and no one else would have noticed (except perhaps his wife) but Silas could tell there was something off about him. He seemed almost defeated. Why would he be feeling that way when their mission was nearly complete? 

"You okay, Blaze?" he dared to ask since they were alone. 

The man finally acknowledged his presence. He had been lost in thought before. "Oh, it's you. I'm fine. Shouldn't you be getting some sleep?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

Blaze sighed and wouldn't meet his eyes. "...I can't. I have too much on my mind. Don't worry about me, alright? I'll still help take over headquarters in the morning."

Silas frowned as he thought of something. His friend hated the former king of Mirea for what he did to his family and had to fight him earlier. That might have been a painful thing to do. It could have brought back memories best left forgotten. 

He knew Blaze was the type to suffer in silence. He wouldn't want to talk about it so prying wouldn't help. 

Supposedly, he trusted Silas the most but wouldn't talk to him about his deepest wounds aside from the one time he gave minimal detail about what the king did in Katalya. Was there anyone he trusted his pain with? 

His wife didn't know anything about his revenge plan. He wouldn't have told her about it either. So that left him dealing with something traumatizing alone. 

"Blaze...you know I've always got your back, right?" Silas asked hesitantly. 

He couldn't so much as muster a fake smile but he did nod. "Yes and I appreciate it."

"You don't have to keep everything to yourself but I understand if you want to. That's all I have to say. I'm going to go find somewhere to sleep but all the good spots are probably taken by now."

Silas turned to go but was stopped by the sound of his name. "Conrad."

"Yes?"

"I had to see his magic again. He killed my family by impaling them on giant thorns and he did the same to the queen and prince while trying to attack me. I can't sleep because if I do the nightmares will come back," Blaze said in a dull voice. 

He was horrified. The king was even more unhinged than he thought! He couldn't imagine killing his own family even if it was an accident. 

No wonder Blaze was so bothered! Reliving that must have been awful. 

Veronica was still out of town so he didn't have her to comfort him right now either. And Silas sincerely doubted that anything he said or did would be of any help at this point. 

"I'm sorry," he told him softly. "I know it doesn't mean anything but I am. The king is gone now though. You never have to deal with him again." 

Blaze didn't respond. He looked broodingly into a corner of the throne room for several minutes before saying anything. "We'll need to redecorate this place as soon as we're done handling the royal army. I want it to be taken care of before my wife gets back."

Silas sighed internally. He didn't even acknowledge what was said and went on to solve the next problem. That sort of logical response was just like him.

"I'm sure there's a royal furniture maker somewhere. Worst case scenario, we commission someone in town."

Blaze nodded. "I think I'm going to redo things in the Katalyan style. Anyway, get some sleep."

Silas was willing to bet he would be up all night trying to distract himself by coming up with decoration ideas. Poor guy. He needed sleep more than anyone else here. 

"Do your best to get a little yourself, alright? Even if you do have nightmares no one will know if you stay in here."

"...I'll try. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Silas left still worrying about his friend but knowing there was nothing he could do. He wished there was something he could say that would help but it was more likely he would end up bungling it. 

He couldn't fathom the depths of Blaze's despair. He had lost his parents when he was young but that was very, very different from seeing them brutally murdered right in front of him. It was amazing Blaze managed to be so composed all the time after going through something like that. 

It was difficult for Silas to fall asleep too though for entirely different reasons. He was worried about his friend, taking over the royal army without bloodshed, and what in the world he was going to tell his wife when this was all over. 

He didn't have it as bad as Blaze though. Telling Elaine he had been part of a coup was less severe than explaining to Veronica that her husband had become king in her absence. She wasn't aware he had been a prince so it would likely come as a great shock. How was he even going to get the news to her? It wasn't the sort of thing you could write in a letter!

He was such a serious person and tended to hide his pain. The only one who brought out his lighter side was his wife. If she left him over this…

No. Silas couldn't think like that. Blaze believed she would be able to accept the truth so he had to as well. He should be more concerned about his own wife's reaction but it was difficult knowing that Veronica meant everything to his surprisingly pitiful friend. 

Looking at Rukelion Blaze no one would ever think 'pitiful'. He was far too capable for that. Stoic, brilliant, and strong, he was the perfect soldier. He would make the perfect king too provided he didn't have a mental breakdown before his wife got back. Right now the odds weren't looking great. 

He never showed weakness. You would have to be intimately familiar with his moods to even guess there was something going on with him but even when Silas pressed he never fully cracked. 

He wasn't emotionless—he was far from it—but didn't let his emotions out in front of others unless you counted how sappy he was in front of Veronica. She seemed to be the only one he did let his emotions out around but Silas seriously doubted the negative ones had ever made their way out in front of her. 

Living like that must be difficult. Poor Blaze had it rough and couldn't (or wouldn't) talk about it in detail with anyone. 

He was kind of pitiful though if you really thought about it. He had gone through something so traumatic at such a young age then fell in love with the first person to show him kindness afterward but she didn't return his feelings for more than seven years. 

Things were finally working out for him but it would all be moot if Veronica couldn't forgive what he had done to avenge his country. If necessary, Silas would jump in and say something but he really hoped it didn't come to that. 

Blaze had enough to worry about without throwing his wife into the mix. He had to find a way to placate the nobles after taking over the country by force since he wasn't the type to execute everyone who gave him grief. If he was he wouldn't have thrown all of the royal guards in prison; he would have had them killed. 

It was still hard to believe he wanted Silas of all people to be his chief advisor. What did he know about running a country?!

But his friend wanted someone he could trust and he already knew he could trust him. They had been through a lot together, after all, both in Aveleen and once they began plotting this together. 

He had been the first to get involved aside from Blaze himself. Somehow he seemed happier about their victory even though he had been working on it for way less time. It was probably because the poor guy was so emotionally drained after dealing with the king. 

Silas hoped he was able to get at least a little sleep. He was certainly going to need it tomorrow.

Taking over the royal army headquarters was more of a risk than taking over the castle had been. There were a lot more soldiers, more weapons, and more people they knew personally. That was a wild card. It could work in their favor but it could also make things a whole lot worse. 

He wanted that to be over and done with so he could go home to his wife but was dreading it at the same time. Explaining what happened was not going to be pleasant.. He could already tell.