I'd Give Up The World For You

"Leo…" Daisy said helplessly. "I can't make a promise like that."

"Why?" he asked with a hint of fire in his eyes.

"Because nothing in life is certain! Promises always get broken so I don't like making or hearing them in the first place."

"But you asked me to promise you that I would be more careful. That means you put at least some stock into them. Promise me, Daisy, or I won't go," Leo insisted stubbornly. She could tell he was going to dig in his heels about this. 

What was she supposed to do? Could she really promise to let someone so unstable stay with her no matter what happened? He did need to go to therapy though or he would never get better…

Daisy had grown used to having him around but could she truly promise the rest of her life to him the way he had basically already done to her? That was an awfully big commitment considering they weren't even in a relationship. 

But Leo would change his mind someday. She was certain of it. He wasn't trying to get her to promise to be in a relationship with him. He only wanted to stay with her.

As soon as he was doing better he wouldn't rely on her so much anymore. He would go live his own life and she wouldn't have to worry about him. He would leave on his own once got a hold of himself. 

She would be able to handle that, wouldn't she? Since she was expecting it anyway. 

Daisy didn't want to leave him any open-ended loopholes to take advantage of like a crutch though. There had to be an expiration date for this deal or she couldn't make any promises. 

"How about this: if you promise to go to therapy I promise you can stay here for the next year while you figure things out. We can reevaluate after that point. Deal?"

Leo's eyes narrowed. "Make the most serious promise you can."

All she could think of was pinky promises but that seemed far too childish. She decided to use the one he had earlier since it seemed to hold some great meaning to him. "I swear on the fire within me that if you get the help you need, you can stay here for the next year."

To her great astonishment he burst out laughing. He laughed so hard that he fell off the couch and onto the floor, rolling around unable to get a hold of himself. When he looked up at her bewildered face he laughed even harder. She had never seen anyone laugh like that and she was more than a little concerned. 

What was so funny about that?! Had he lost his mind?

"What's wrong with you?" Daisy demanded, making him laugh even harder. 

"Sorry," Leo choked out. "It's just—you can't make a promise like that! The context doesn't…ah, you wouldn't get it."

She scowled at him and crossed her arms over her chest. "Fine then. I was only repeating what you said. What do you want me to do instead?"

He finally sat up and got a hold of himself, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. "It's fine. That will suffice. Thank you, Daisy. I feel much more reassured now. So how do I look for a therapist? I've never done this before."

Daisy didn't want to let this go so easily but knew it would be no use. At least he was already trying to hold up his end of the deal. She sighed before telling him. "You'll need to look up therapists who are in our insurance's network. The website is on the back of your insurance card. 

"You'll need to call around and see who is taking new patients that specializes in PTSD because I'm pretty sure that's what you have. Have you really never been diagnosed before? You'd think after what you saw that somebody would have forced you to go to therapy."

That had been what happened to her. As soon as she became a ward of the state she had court-appointed therapy sessions every other week.

Leo shook his head. "What is PTSD?"

"Post-traumatic stress disorder. I don't know much about it to be honest but given what I've seen and what you've been through it makes the most sense. You'll get it confirmed or not when you go," Daisy said with a shrug. 

"I see."

He didn't say anything else after that. He got up and sat back down on the couch next to her, quietly leaning his head against her shoulder like he had earlier before they had this emotionally charged conversation. Against her better judgment she twisted her head slightly to kiss the top of his. 

Leo had been very vulnerable with her today. Plus he had nearly died. It was the least she could do. 

=== 

Leo began looking into therapists the next day and managed to find one but his first appointment wasn't for a month because they were booked. He seemed rather determined to uphold his end of the deal. He certainly didn't waste any time. 

Daisy kept an eye on him the next several days but, aside from being a bit clingier than before, his most recent trauma didn't seem to be affecting him much. She was willing to bet there was more going on under the surface but all she could see was him sticking to her like glue. 

She wished there was more she could do for him. While looking at her phone's calendar she got an idea. 

His birthday was in a few days. She had completely forgotten with everything else going on but she had seen what it was on his ID when he got carded on Valentine's Day. Doing something to celebrate ought to cheer him up a bit. 

Knowing he loved apple desserts, she decided to make him an apple cake with cinnamon frosting. That was one thing down but she had no idea what sort of gift to give him. He didn't talk much about what he liked. She supposed she could always get him a nonfiction book of some sort. 

Daisy got him something with good reviews online and the night before his birthday she got started on making them cinnamon rolls for breakfast. Leaving them to rise overnight was easier than waking up at four in the morning. 

Leo was still asleep with one arm slung over her side when she woke up, quickly shutting off her alarm before he stirred too much. She had to wake up early enough for them to bake. 

As soon as they were in the oven she set a timer and crawled back into bed since he was tossing a bit restlessly. He was probably having another nightmare, poor thing. She snuggled back up against him and rubbed his back until he shuddered and stilled. 

It felt rather like she was trying to comfort a fussy baby and that was strange considering he was a tough-looking man. He looked much more defenseless in his sleep though. Younger and more innocent somehow. 

That might be because his eyes were closed. Those eyes had seen more than Daisy could wrap her head around. They were mournful, raging eyes like they belonged to an ancient being who had seen every terrible thing the world had to offer. They weren't the eyes of your typical twenty-one-year-old even without taking the heterochromia into account. 

Leo had broken into a cold sweat during his nightmare and she gently brushed the strands of hair sticking to his forehead away before trailing her hand down the side of his face. The whole time he had been here he had never grown any facial hair. His skin was perfectly smooth. 

She stroked his cheek with her thumb, unable to fall back asleep. He wasn't astonishingly handsome or anything—his eyes and hair were more attention-catching than the rest of his face—but he was undeniably attractive. 

And he was hers. Unwillingly so on her part but that didn't change the fact that he said she could do whatever she wanted with him. 

That sort of offer was becoming harder to resist but she knew she shouldn't because his mixed up his feelings for her were tangled in all of his guilt and grief. It would be nice to let him love her again because of how wonderful the first time had been but that wouldn't be fair to either of them. 

Messed up as he may be, Daisy was attracted to him. She couldn't deny that much. 

She was attracted to someone who was in love with her and that was incredibly dangerous. She had no doubt he would give her whatever she wanted but it wouldn't be right to take advantage of him like that. 

Something was seriously wrong with her this morning. She wasn't supposed to be attracted to him! Where had this even come from? Was it solely because she was examining his face so early in the morning when she wasn't fully awake yet?