I'm a Walking Disaster With My Unwanted Virginity

Chapter 151: Who comes up with these titles?

I sighed. "Well, technically I'm not Kin, so I don't see a problem here."

"About that-" Uncle grimaced. "Remember mom always used to wear long pajamas even during the day?"

Yeah, I saw where this was going. 

Unfortunately, I didn't remember. "Uh-huh." I still nodded anyway. My earlier memories of my grandmother were kind of weird- like she knocking the lights out of her children and her husband, sometimes even me- but I subconsciously thought they were dreams: moreover, I hoped they were dreams too. And in the recent memories, I didn't remember grandmother wearing pajamas of all things. 

Uncle sighed. "You can stop pretending to be asleep now. This is important, so you should listen too."

Marg turned this way, frowning a little.

'Cute.'

"She, isn't half- right?" I spoke the words very carefully. Lately, with all the trouble I'd actually forgotten about my little trip to the bottom of this island. 

Uncle looked awkwardly at me for a moment. "Yeah, 'was' would be a good word though."

"She's not anymore?" Meanwhile, Marg just looked at us with confused looks. I looked ahead and boy was the nurse glaring.  "Maybe we shouldn't talk about this now."

"It's fine. You two can keep a secret right?" Uncle first glared at the nurse and then at Marg.

Needless to say, both nodded very vigorously. 

"Don't blame me if she beats you to a pulp," I mumbled. Obviously, I was talking about my grandmother.  She was actually in some sense, scarier than mom. After gramp's death, she became rather distant though, I finally understood why. 

Uncle cleared his throat. "Simply put, you inherited some Kin genes. And because of that, you might be susceptible to that ore. It's very precious, and there isn't much left on the earth. The Battlesuins are claiming this is the last piece but I doubt it."

Well, now he said it. 

The nurse wasn't that shocked, she did look at me a bit funny though, almost as though all the missing pieces suddenly fell in the slot. 

Marg, however, was a bit spooked. Would knowing this change her view of me? Would she think of me as a monster?

She already knew about the seals and my personalities but-

I felt frightened, what if she left me because of this? What if-

But Marg- she just smiled as she looked at me. She didn't say a word but just smiled. It was very comforting, to say the least.

I let out a sigh of relief. "Well, I don't see a reason to trust them and as you said, I only inherited some genes, so technically it won't be that effective." Besides, I had an amazing saber. Then again, I had to actually look into what made this saber tick.

It could have been a new technology the geezer had invented, or it could have been that dragon core. 

And I couldn't just ignore the effects of that ore either. I had to make sure it didn't work on me, somehow. And according to uncle, even if one wasn't Kin, they'd still have a hard time if they came under the ore's effects.

"Good enough for me. Burn the whole place down and bring back all their goods." Uncle winked. "Should be easy for you two. Oh and do it from afar, like dropping a nuclear bomb. That'd save you from all the pesky problems."

Spoken like a true terrorist and a supervillain. 

"Wait, you want us to steal from them?"

"Technically, you're just taking spoils of war, so it ain't stealing." He again winked and started leaving. "And as I said, that stone's precious so." He grinned very evilly. "Conquering the world won't be a dream anymore. Just imagine what we could do with something like that."

"War? And wouldn't holding the stone be just as bad as someone using it on you?" I kind of gave them an ultimatum but never really thought about calling this a war. It was just a squabble between two families anyway. Two very powerful families to be exact. 

I guess calling it war wasn't that much of a stretch.

And that's when Merin came screaming. 

Oh boy, this was going to be bad. 

Uncle grinned, kind of looked awkward, and didn't pay Merin any attention. I could bet he hadn't thought about how to actually use the stone, or ore, or whatever. 

Merin, however, just ran to me and looked like something was after his life. "Y-ya-you haven't seen yar- Holo right?" I didn't know why but he was speaking a very weird dialect I'd never heard off. Was this guy okay?

Probably not. 

"Calm down. What happened?"

I was already seated so I didn't have to prepare myself or anything. Marg also sat down, and just looked at the nearly breathless guy. 

Meanwhile, Mom and Elsa also came back. Hadn't they left just half an hour ago? Why the hell were they coming back again?

Merin breathed hard, sweated hard as well. This guy was going crazy. "You're everywhere."

I was everywhere? 

That didn't make me feel that good about myself though, cause I hated to break it to him but I was sitting pretty on a freaking bed inside the nurse's office.

Definitely not making copies of myself and spreading them across the globe. 

"DO you mind telling me more?"

"You're all over the internet!"

Okay, that was better. 

"What he means to say is, there are thousands of articles about you," mom said. 

"And that's a bad thing because?"

Because the last time I remember, I basically just declared war on the Battlesuins. At least uncle called it a war. 

So technically, this was inevitable. And shouldn't have been that surprising. 

"There's actually more to it than just bad news." Mom smiled but her veins bulged a little. That was not a good sign. 

My holo was still kind of functional so I turned it on. But the mere sight of the poor thing even struggling to register my gesture weighed heavily on my conscience. 

The first article? "Supervillain Julio's son declared war on the world!"

Wait, what? My eyes were failing me?

Was I going blind? I knew I was potentially going bald, but blind too?

I kept on reading. And apparently, the author made it clear that I was declaring war on the whole world if they decided to hurt my family. Plus the guy also quoted me that I'd beat everyone at the newcomers' international tournament. 

He made me look very villainous if nothing else. 

Well, this just got complicated. And then there were other articles. 

"The Cursed Mask Romswell was Julio's son all along? The mystery boy's identity finally revealed!"

Giggles came from Marg's direction.

Hadn't I made myself clear that I was his grandson! Why the hell did I go through the trouble of putting up with that name then?

The sheer embarrassment!

"Battlesuins in trouble, Helio on the double."

The giggles intensified.

What the hell did that even mean?

I didn't know why but these titles were getting awfully embarrassing to read. And I was even giggling a little from the freaking titles out of sheer embarrassment. 

Yeah, I wanted to kill someone now. It didn't matter if I had the resolve to or not, but I just wanted to. 

Not to mention it'd be even more embarrassing if I somehow got my ass handed to me after all this. 

"Can't we just blow up the companies that produce these types of atrocities?" I smiled and looked at mom. 

"Stop talking like Daddy or I'll beat the hell out of you." She smiled back.

Denied!

I sighed. "Just because our powers are similar doesn't mean I'm his son," I mumbled and sighed. Not that it bothered me that much, but if I was deemed gramp's son, what would that make mom?

Mom sighed too. "Well, the world doesn't know your father's name and they don't know much about our family either: more like they don't know me. Unlike all the other villains of this world, our family doesn't bang our own drums. Don't let it bother you."

If that was okay with her, then I guess it was fine. 

Wait, our family doesn't bang their own drums?

World's baddest villain?

World's most wanted criminal?

The leader of the most notorious terrorist group?

Yeah, I had my doubts. 

"By the way mom, if I'm part K-" I stopped. "You know what I mean. Then how come you are and Elsa's not?"

Apparently, mom did have some genes, namely, her knee caps weren't human. How did I know that? 

Yeah, I'd rather not imagine that.

As for Elsa, she was fairly normal. I was kind of normal too. I guess it could have been a suppressed gene?

Actually, now that I think about it, aren't all humans kind of like Kin? After all, we all had some animal features.

And then I realized, I only met an actual Kin only once in my entire life. So, I didn't really have any idea what to even think about all these. 

Mom gave me a dull look. "That moron told you huh?" She sighed and a murderous aura oozed out of her. "Didn't you study that there are certain types of genes that only activate in some children rather than all?" Mom smiled hard. "What have you been studying in school?"

Her anger had nowhere to go, meaning, I was ded. 

"Actually-" The nurse started. Oh boy, I was about to be Fuc*ed. There was no doubt about it. "Lately-"

'Someone, anyone- save me.' I started to freak out a little. 'Oh, lord chocolate- if thou art there, I beg of thee!'

"Oh, there you are." A woman's voice, rather mature. I knew it very well. "Been looking for you. Have you seen Excrucio?"

'HUH! Miracle!' Chocolate God was real!

"Oh, miss Annie." God, was I glad to see her!

"Helio." She nodded and looked at Mom.

Her expression wasn't that different from Marg's. But unlike Marg, she was always like that. She only wore black one-piece dresses and a blue hat, always. It didn't matter if it was summer, it didn't matter if it was winter. She never changed. Actually, her appearance hadn't changed in the last five years either. 

It made me wonder a lot about things. 

She was also on the constant hunt for her husband, as Uncle always had a tendency to run away to the secluded places of this planet. 

Actually, all women of the Romswell household were kind of weird. Even people that married into the family were rather domineering. I sure hoped my wife wasn't going to be like that. 

"He ran away that way, you might catch him if you ran fast enough."

The woman- my aunt, nodded and just ran. She didn't even thank us, not that it mattered. 

'My Miracle? Chocolate god, you liar.'

I sniffed. I really wanted to cry right now. 

"He overused a memory instiller and ruined his brain. It might take him a while to recover, so please take good care of him." The nurse smiled like she did me a great favor. 

Mom also smiled, no veins popping up, nothing, "Oh, I'll take extra good care of him." She literally sang those words and cracked her knuckles.

Oh yeah, I definitely believed her. 

Elsa grimaced, Marg giggled and my life ended.

'Farewell, world.'

But just at that moment when I thought mom was about to clobber me- mom grabbed me, hugged me tight, and kissed me on my forehead. "Thank you."

Wait, did I die and made my way into heaven already?

'Huh?'

Mom didn't say anything else and just left. Elsa was confused more than me and also left. 

"What the hell just happened?"

Seriously!

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