I'm a Walking Disaster With My Unwanted Virginity

Sometime later, the geezer came to the party. The guy had come in a wheelchair. 

"Glad you could make it," I said. Trying my best to form a smile. 

Most of the guests were leaving. They were wishing me luck and stuff as they left. 

The party was over. 

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, kid." He looked normal, as in too normal. He even had a suit and a bowtie on him. 

There was a nurse behind him. She was doing all the pulling and the pushing. 

I didn't know what to talk to him about. I did care about him. But we didn't know each other enough. 

But I guess that was just an excuse. 

I just wanted to avoid him- to avoid the topic that he could very well- die. 

Death. 

It was an interesting subject. People take it for granted that their close friends and relatives are immortal while the rest of humanity are mortal. 

But when a close friend or a relative finally passes away- that's when they feel the reality. That's when they understand- everyone can die. Your mother- your father, your lover, and you. 

And I wanted to avoid that. I knew that and yet didn't want to know that. 

I just-

"Why the long face kid? Shouldn't you be happy and stuff? You just got married!"

Some of my relatives and friends were still here. The bulk of them had left. 

"I am happy." I again tried to smile. But I couldn't. "I really am. It's just- I can't explain."

He snorted. "Kids." He spread his arms. "Come here."

I went for a hug. He hugged me and then started whispering. "Can I get a male nurse?"

Um- what?

Was this guy really dying?

Cause he sure didn't look like it. The guy's face was smugger than Merin's. 

I wanted to cry and laugh at the same time but chose the latter. 

He let go of me and looked at Marg. "Well, missy when the kid came for you in the null, he said he was going to marry you. I kind of thought he was just saying it for the sake of saying it. I actually didn't think he'd marry you. I mean, aren't you like too young for that stuff?" He chuckled a little. "But really, congratulations, and I hope you two can make this work." He was speaking to both of us now. 

Anyway, with most of the guests gone, I could talk a bit more freely. 

So- "How would you like to become a vampire?" I changed the subject. 

But after saying it- 'Good going moron.' Yeah, both the shadow and I agreed that was a stupid thing to say. I could have phrased it better or at least started from elsewhere. 

He just looked at me, blinked twice. "What?"

Yes, what indeed. 

"A vampire. You'll be the servant of a primal one. So, I guess, that makes you a rather mid-ranked vamp."

And I didn't think Leilis would order him around or something. 

"Wait, wait, you're not making sense. Me, a vamp? The hell would I want to be one of that vixen's kin?"

"You don't want to become a vampire, because Hyora was a vampire?"

Grandma came over. "That's also the reason why he refused to take half of the procedures given to him that would have made things easier."

I just gave the geezer a very disapproving look and he averted his eyes. 

"I hate her, okay?" And he started whining like a kid. "I hate her kind too. My sister and half of my planet died because of vampires and that vixen."

Meanwhile, Leilis came out of the washroom with something like a bowl in her hand?

'When the hell did she go in there?' I actually didn't pay attention to my surroundings. I was just staring at the geezer all this time. 

The original plan was for her to maybe cut a bit of her finger and give me a small vial of blood which we'd feed the geezer. And since vampires had great healing, she wouldn't have been affected much. 

Leilis came over and gave me the bowl. "Fresh blood." She winked. 

Well, it was fresh alright. Crimson viscous stuff. And very fragrant too. 

'But why this much?' A vial? Yeah, no, this was more than two bags worth. 

The geezer was sweating. "Is that-"

"Fresh blood." I parroted and went closer to him. "Fresh blood." I grinned. 

"No, no, no!" He started to flail but grandma kind of just tied him down. "I will not drink that!"

Our relatives- the few that were still here- just stayed by the sidelines. 

"I will kiss you, if you drink it." 

'The hell did I just say?'

"Tempting, but no!"

Wait, that was tempting?

Come to think of it, this guy wasn't straight, right?

And he wanted a male nurse. "Fine, you can have your male nurse."

The nurse behind him gave me and the geezer a very rude glare. I guess I had to apologize to her later. 

The geezer though… "Again, tempting but-" Well, he was hesitant, that's for sure. 

But he was also considering this. 

'You seriously want more?'

What else could I offer?

In the end, "Screw it, just drink the damn thing."

I forced his mouth open and made him drink it. He actually bit my finger. And spilled half of the blood. Weirdly when the blood made contact with the floor, it kind of evaporated. 'So, this bowl thingy was special?'

But half did go in. 

He almost choked on it. 

"Quickly, wash it!" Grandma prompted. 

This guy wasn't a vampire yet, but he was also not quite normal. And even a normal person's bite was poisonous, let alone an ill guy like him. 

And he'd bitten my finger quite hard too. It probably wasn't intentional; probably. 

Anyway, I washed my wound and wait- what wound?

I didn't even have the marks.

'So Enira's coming around?'

This day really was amazing. I got married to the girl of my dreams, we found a way to maybe save the geezer's life, and the snake-dragon thingy would finally come out of the saber!

I went back and saw the geezer just glaring at me. 

Well, I won't be on his good nephew list, that's for sure. 

He was also foaming slightly and making weird growls. 

"That's normal, right?" I said. 

"Yup." Leilis assured me. "Totally."

"How many vampires have you made again?"

"About some ten thousand and stuff? Come to think of it, most of them were soldiers and gay. Or rather, I told them to-" She started giggling as she reminisced. "Don't worry, I won't make this guy-"

"He's already gay."

"Oh!" She shut up. 

Meanwhile, the geezer's face become slightly paler and his teeth came out. Two long canines. 

His belly shrunk slightly and he might have actually grown an inch in height. 

"You said the chances were slim of him-" I looked at grandma. 

"Because he wouldn't have accepted it. But now that you made him drink- it's no surprise things will work out; he'll be fine. Whether he'd still talk to you after this, is a different matter."

I did not like the sound of that but if the guy was going to be alive, then I was cool with it.