5. Look. look at me

The heat in his head, far from cooling down, was boiling more intensely.

Yes.

It wasn’t that I completely threw out my reason.

just.

‘Is there anything wrong with being so desperate?’

Bear with it, bear with it, keep enduring it.

… Up to this moment, what have I gained?

nothing in reality.

there was nothing.

All that remains are wounds and scars.

invisible to the eye

So the perpetrators, without any remorse, would have continued to repeat the perpetrators.

Patina holding a wooden sword watched her with sharp eyes.

The other side was also excited about every single thing, but just for the trivial reason of holding a sword, even if it wasn’t a real sword, his appearance changed suddenly.

“Take it.”

Before the cold voice even reached my ears.

Her persona disappeared as if it were scattered.

‘?!’

If you see and react, it’s too late.

Instinctively, tilt the sword in both hands and set it to the right.

Percussion!

The rough and intense crashing sound of trees touching each other hit my ears first.

However, more than the frictional sound, the actual impact transmitted through the wooden sword was more intense.

“Ugh!”

“Are you being pushed away by something like this?! Grab your power! It means to hold on even more hotly and coldly!”

It’s forced.

Because the other side had the privilege of strengthening the body by using mana as if it were natural.

But what about this one?

‘Because it’s meaningless.’

Is it possible to resist for a moment, to the point of outburst?

That’s all.

Fuck!

Even though I was so angry, it was blatantly felt that I was thoroughly taking care of myself.

“Reaction is delayed! Are you just going to be beaten?!”

“… … .”

It is a pointless provocation.

Because I knew better than anyone else that a fever in my head wouldn’t give me strength that I didn’t have.

much less

… That I have the number of conversions.

It’s not like there’s a trump card.

‘… … .’

However.

That is not a reason to avoid confrontation.

That doesn’t give you any justification for suppressing your anger.

Should the weak, the weak, shut up, shut up, lower their eyes, and endure humiliation?

Just like a mute, like a blind man.

An absurd and unreasonable insult.

Should we recklessly endure and accept meaningless slander and selling?

There is no freedom for those who do not resist.

rights even more.

even though I know that all too well.

Why didn’t you struggle until now?

“… … !”

… Because it is pointless.

It’s because it will come back with a bigger loss if you do it.

Because I understood it in my head, because the calculation was so clear.

… Close your eyes, plug your ears, give up thinking.

Just, just breathe, the sun sets, the moon rises, the sun sets and the moon rises again… .

Like a rotten old tree, like that of a withered weed.

Silently, all I could do was hold on.

If there is only one hope out there.

that.

… A promise to leave this place someday.

The conclusion reached after many years of layering.

It is the only hope given to me.

It was a perfect lifeline.

“How long do you think you can last?! If you don’t fight! If you don’t attack, the enemy may retreat! Not even turning back!”

It’s a useless word.

A truly useless sermon.

No, at this point, it’s just slander, ridicule, and contempt.

But, so what?

I’m used to being beaten.

Even more shameful because of it.

Because it was always this side that was rolling on the floor terribly in mock sparring.

The eye level was lowered, and the countless gazes that looked down and down this side in the sight looking up.

… Because I’m so used to it.

That’s why getting hit, holding on, and being sprawled out like a trick.

I’m so used to it that I’m sick of it.

Even he had to adapt.

At some point, even that was a way of living and even accepted it meekly.

Kwajik!

The wooden sword he was receiving could not withstand the shock and dug in half, causing a crack.

Most of the things that didn’t manage to break or fall apart must have been intentional from the other side.

Because she was capable enough.

“Please take up a new sword.”

“… … .”

Not at all.

As if rebelling against that, I threw away the wooden sword again.

“Now, what are you going to do?”

“why? Are your bare hands burdensome?”

“Stop provocations that don’t work. You look like that even when you’re holding a sword, do you think that attitude is acceptable now?”

“If your sword breaks in real combat, do you think it will wait for you to get another weapon? Did you deliver a really great article?”

“… … How far are you going to fall?”

decline? freeze to death

“why? Does my father teach you that?”

“Kariel—! you really As a human being, there are things I must say! Don’t you have something to say!”

why… .

Is he more angry than me?

I didn’t even insult myself.

Even more so, the target of the sarcastic comparison is a man named my father.

Kariel chewed her lips and replied.

“You say you’re fixing your brain? Were you talking? you also? If that’s a knight, why don’t you just make a living by farming or cutting trees?”

“regret… Don’t, don’t.”

Ahh.

I feel that my weight is shaking.

It’s like riding the skin and even slicing the muscles.

Even to the bones, that intense rage is transmitted with a sense of weight.

But why

‘like that.’

Isn’t that great?

At least that’s not living.

It was the momentum that he was spewing out saying he would kill someone, and that it was not his will, it definitely touched me.

However, it was too self-evident that there would be no forgiveness or mercy.

With a single cloud of foot, the ground cracks like a dense spider’s web.

She kicked the ground and rushed in, bringing a strong gust of wind.

With a speed and momentum that couldn’t be compared to just a moment ago.

But what

“?!”

I evaded by a short distance.

The ensuing series of attacks.

Avoided by a very narrow margin. narrowly evade again.

A wooden sword that hits the hair.

But it didn’t even rub against my scalp, so I didn’t shake my brain, let alone my skull.

It was a wooden sword that cut through the air with a bloody puncture sound.

did not reach

do not reach

The difference between all haircuts.

it continues in succession

minutely.

Occasionally, the skin was hit, but the skin was scratched and reddened, and some were peeled off, scratched, and cut by the aftermath of the swing, and blood flowed through the wounds.

However.

Among them, none of them lead to fatal wounds.

“… … .”

Maybe it should be touching.

I can’t believe I dodge Patina’s attack with my bare body!

that’s why i understand

I have to realize more desperately.

An uncomfortable sound of iron friction echoed in my brain like a curse.

Kiki-!

Horrible.

The emotion materializes and presses on the heart.

Rolling and rolling like that for many years.

Toil, toil, and toil again.

Chewing on regret, using even that as a driving force to hold the sword, using even inferiority as a whip to wield the sword, flexing and utilizing mana, and rolling one’s brain to make up for what is lacking.

I’ve really, really tried all sorts of ways.

I.

In just a few moments of meeting the demon king, inviting death, making a resolution, and handling it.

… He was somehow responding to such an offensive that he thought he would never be able to counter in his lifetime.

‘under!’

of course.

Counterattack is not possible.

Switching to an offensive is absolutely impossible.

Even now, it was as dangerous as riding a single rope with one foot.

The myriad showers of arrows mercilessly stabbed the whole body as targets.

Until I fall as a target.

It pours all the way through and penetrates.

In addition.

The disaster that the heavily armed horsemen rushed in like a sandstorm or tidal wave was an mortification that the naked body could not accept.

But that’s not the end.

Occasionally run over or trampled at the feet of a colossus.

They were attacked by a group of beasts, and their whole bodies were torn and torn apart.

Being slashed, stabbed and beaten by armed forces rushing in front and behind.

dying and dying and dying again

What I finally got

… Just struggling to survive a little longer.

However, its limitations were clear.

‘It’s not enough to avoid it.’

know.

I know all too well.

However, the Demon King declared that he would not tell them how to do it.

Tell them to find out on their own, and arrange a way.

‘Didn’t I say you’d regret it? Didn’t you just accept it when you said you were generous?’

do i regret

Or do you resent it?

‘Do not be ridiculous.’

Regret, I don’t know since when.

At least until this moment, my life since I was born, everything I passed by was regret.

In the past, there was a time when I was mistaken that I was great, and that I was huge.

Even that, now, a faint fragment that I can’t even remember properly.

After all, reality is miserable, cheap, and nasty.

All I have left is… .

Broken, broken and tossed.

Only pathetic pride.

Kwajik!

“?!”

It’s like you’ve been waiting for this moment.

Toward the wooden sword stabbing in a straight line. Kariel opened her palm wide and received it.

Naturally, the tip of the wooden sword pierced his palm, and even that was not enough, in a situation where it penetrated the back of his hand.

Pushing his palm forward, he grabbed the wooden sword tightly in an instant.

“What, what did you do?!”

“Bite this tight.”

Before even paying attention.

He was already punching Patina in the face with his fist on the other side.

Kwajik!

“Keuk!”

All knights, even in death, did not let go of the sword.

“Are you insane?!”

No need for words.

The first punch was taken out of embarrassment, but the second doesn’t work.

Perhaps deciding that it was too late to block it with her free hand, she used her wits and received a punch with her forehead.

It was a natural result, but Kariel’s water fist, which was weak, was scattered miserably like the sea water that hit the reef.

However.

Undeterred, Kariel swung her fist again.

“What?!”

Her eyes wandered around.

Is it the embarrassment or fear of having made Kariel’s own hands like that?

That embarrassment allowed Kariel to attack twice or three times.

However, that’s all.

When the momentary opportunity was neutralized, Patina grabbed Kariel’s fist with her other hand.

Another surprise here.

She snatched Kariel’s broken fist, which she had missed after holding onto it, using her mouth wide open in embarrassment.

All in all, he overturned Kariel with his whole torso and passed him over.

‘Oops… .’

no

What is this?

It seemed to fall forward along her body, but suddenly the body flipped over and collided with the ground.

The shock transmitted from his back pierced his internal organs, heart, and even his lungs.

“Cuck!”

When I stopped breathing, my mind went blank in an instant.

Really, it’s a mess.

The palm of his left hand was pierced by a wooden sword and was a mess.

Thanks to the collision with the ground, I couldn’t even breathe smoothly right away, and even the fingers and wrist of my right hand were messed up in the aftermath of being crushed and bitten.

Even so, is it so miserable to be used to pain?

Even in the middle of it, I squeezed my body and struggled to stand up.

Instead, use the wooden sword that passed through the palm of your hand as a support, and even use the bent left arm joint as a support to raise your body somehow.

Grinding my teeth in excruciating pain, I couldn’t bear it.

“aaah!”

Rolling on the floor and struggling.

Still, he didn’t give up.

Even if it’s ridiculous.

in this pain right now.

I am terribly stupid.

… Because I had never experienced before, the overflowing sense of liberation made my eyes overflow with moisture and run down water.

The sky is dark, even the moon is shabby, but only the stars are brilliant.

The air was cold but hot, my whole body felt like it was on fire, and even the wind that blew was weak.

to all of that.

For this moment, I didn’t feel any resentment, hatred, or absurdity at all.

‘ah… .’

Patter, whether blood or flesh or fragments from the left hand.

Something continued to crash and tumble down to the ground.

nonetheless.

Without fear, without regret, without regret.

I’m soaked in low satisfaction.

… Had I been crazy long ago?

if not.

“now! Now this! What, what are you guys doing?!”

The sound of that voice woke me up.

“Party! Kariel! You… what the hell is this… .”

Ahh.

mother.

look at me

I did it.

That genius who joined the knights led by his father as the youngest.

I… .

‘I heard you gave me a shot?’

The expression on her mother’s face is truly miserable.

On the other side of the field of vision, Patina’s expression was no different from that, and it was stained with despair.

Therefore.

I sighed and laughed out loud.

A smile and a laugh come out of nowhere.

can’t stand it

Even the pain is delightful, and even the pain is delightful.

However, this joy will only be short-lived.

Ultimately, all of this

Although it will lead to their condemnation of the lowly me.

how about that too

oh, it doesn’t matter

anyway i am

… … Coming soon

Because it was a being that would disappear from here forever.

In an unknown sense of relief and achievement.

I was finally able to laugh out loud.

Toxic depending on the day.

The moonlight I looked up at was shabby.

Only the starlight spread widely and was extremely brilliant.

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