I'm still alive

When I entered the container house, a damp smell penetrated my nose. I waved my hands away the dust and looked inside. Some chairs, tables, and supplies boxes were piled up with dust. Confirming that there was no sign of any particular sign, I lowered the window blade slowly.

As soon as I enter the container house, the woman follows me in a flash. I sighed and looked, but the woman looks away from my eyes and looks away. I'm getting tired, too. So I just closed the container door pretending I didn't see it.

Then I locked the door and put tables and chairs in front of the door.

And the only window I had blocked with my hiking bag. Then the inside of the container is locked in darkness. The orange light that came in through the window crevice gradually faded. The shorter year had completely subsided after some time.

He relaxed, breathed deeply, and sat down on the chair. When I sit down, she also puts down the boy she was supporting and makes him lean against the wall. And in that cold weather, he sits slowly, sweating a lot. There was silence between them and me.

The boy was barely following me, and his head was lowered again as if he had lost consciousness, and the woman was looking at me with terrified eyes. Why did you follow me when you were afraid of me? I was annoyed for no reason, but on the other hand, I was impressed by the sweetness that followed me.

The woman looks at the face and wounds of the boy who is fainting while looking at me. Wiping sweat off your sleeves is very sincere. Though a free rider, there was a strange feeling in her human form. I shook my head in a strangely light heart while smashing my bitter taste. I pulled a bucket of water out of my bag and held it out to her.

She hesitated, but soon began to drink after receiving a bottle of water with a 'thank you.' Then he drinks half of his head and stops drinking in a panic. He shook the boy slightly as if he was about to drink himself, and soon grabbed his chin and spilled water into his mouth.

At first, I couldn't even drink half of it because it flowed beside my mouth But as soon as the water came into my mouth, I was gulping down the water fiercely. But the amount of water was small. The boy wanted more water, as if he had just finished drinking it in a second and his thirst had not yet gone.

The woman looked at the boy with a sad face and then at once looked at once she looked at me. I shook my head. A shallow knowledge, but fast water supply is not good for a sick body. Later in the evening, I was thinking about making her drink slowly, but the woman put down the empty water bottle with an anxious face as if she misunderstood what I meant.

Now came the complete darkness. I hear their shouts in the distance. Did they find any game? I was nervous for no reason, but I shook my head to erase my fear. When she looked at the woman, she was shaking like a dog. That woman is one of the survivors of this hell. More than me, it would've been better. It would never have never been less. I opened my mouth and asked her this. 'What's her name?' she replied, with her terrified eyes and trembling voice.

Lee Hye-in..’

This is Lee Jin-soo......... that's my brother.’

At first, I was reluctant to even make eye contact with myself, and soon began to talk about things I didn't even ask. It was dark at night and I only thought of anxious miscellaneous thoughts when I stayed still, so I listened carefully to what she said. She said she went to Seoul National University, and her brother was a sophomore at Youngrak High School nearby.

He said he was resting at home after finishing his part-time job at a convenience store, and that his younger brother, who had to study late at night, rushed home. He then turned pale and urged him to run away quickly and leave immediately.

So you're surprised. What's going on? I asked him, but he didn't answer. First, I asked to wait for my parents. And when the four months passed, his brother and himself fled to a government-designated shelter.

She said she was lucky to see people being eaten in the middle of her escape. Since then, I've lost contact with my parents and I just kept my mouth shut because I didn't know what to say. And asked her.

'What about the shelter?

Then her expression turned dark. The first day in the shelter was full of hope. As it is a school building, the size of the building is large and the number of soldiers is increasing. And it's all coming to an end. He said he didn't worry about the shelter people because of the soldiers who said, "Take it easy."

And she shuddered that night that they raided the shelter. He said that he had barely escaped with a few refugees, including his younger brother, and that only three people, including himself, were left at the end, who started to die one by one as they fled here. And I finally arrived at the convenience store where I met him."

Upon arriving at the convenience store, the group reportedly panicked and stayed up all night doing nothing. As time went by, hope and destination were gone, and all were in despair. But the college student's brother, who was leading the group, suddenly saw him and said he was going to rape him.

The small essence was to be hit like this by blocking it. She kept her mouth shut when she said that. She looked down at the floor for a moment, and eventually burst into tears, and I couldn't say anything.

I appeared at the dramatic moment when I was about to be raped. I swallowed a bitter saliva and lowered my head. Despair and fear are mixed in confusion that the government, shelters, and the military have not stopped the influx. I closed my eyes tightly, and sighed, feeling hopeless.

Lee Hye-in, who finished talking, was looking at me. When I looked up and made eye contact with her, she asked me this time without avoiding her eyes. 'Where are you going?' I said there was someone waiting a little curt. Then she said, Can I come with Jinsu?'I shut my mouth to the question I expected.

She knew her reality well even though she was afraid of me. That's why he was trying to follow me in order to live. I didn't answer. No, I was actually thinking about it. Of course you have to refuse. What about food supply and demand? What about heating? What about the food that's going to shrink faster if those two come along?

It was the same situation as the woman found in the bicycle center. What was Chae-yeon thinking that day? I tried to dump her coldly, and Chae-yeon took care of her as if it were so natural. I was lost in thought for a long time looking at the wall like that.

It's late at night. She kept asking. He begged and cried again and again that he would only follow. And when I didn't answer, I ended up falling asleep exhausted. The boy was moaning at night. After confirming that she was completely asleep, I sneaked up on the student with a bottle of water and spilled water on her mouth.

He had such a young face and a small figure unlike his age. Nevertheless, I was proud of the boy who would have rushed without fear. And a little sympathy came in, so I slowly finished a bottle of water. Then the boy mumbled and fell asleep with his head down. 'Thank you,' the student was muttering like that.

I missed Chae-yeon. Did you eat? Do you think she's taking good care of you? Come to think of it, I didn't even ask her name. Do you think they're gonna wander around? Just thinking about it made me crazy, so I closed my eyes and tried to sleep.

I hope the night passes quickly. Tonight was unusually long and cold.

* * *

The cold that I have been experiencing has been nothing. It was so cold at dawn that I woke up, so I took a hot pack out of my bag with my trembling hands, put it in my body and rubbed it on my face. And the brother and sister were looking at me when they heard me rustling, so they gave me a hot pack in their hands.

Lee Hye-in bowed her head and thanked me, and Lee Jin-soo now appears to greet her with eyes that are half swollen and half awake. The small warmth from the hot pack soothed my cold body, and I became impatient.

A public toilet with no heating facilities. It is a mountain, so the temperature may be lower. I was worried that Chae-yeon and the woman were holding up well in the sharp wind. The thought of going to Chae-yeon as soon as possible fills my head. The brother and sister accepted the hot pack and fell asleep again, and I chewed water and biscuits in the corner and waited for the morning to come quickly.

I took a deep breath and filled my stomach. When I began to see Dawn through the windowpane, I quickly organized my bag. Then he woke up his brother and sister and gave them water and biscuits. Lee accepted the food with a slightly softer eye than last night and bowed her head in gratitude.

And Lee Jin-soo expressed his gratitude in a somber voice as if he had come to his senses now. After struggling all night, he seems to have managed to overcome it. Lee Hye-in's face also showed a little relief. I said, watching them eat.

'I'm leaving now.’

Lee Hye-in lowered her head with a somber face, and Lee Jin-su sighed deeply. Still, I was sorry to ask for more, but I didn't bring up anything else. I looked at the figure quietly and finally opened my mouth again.

'I'm not gonna stop you from following me. If you need food, I can give you a bed. But you guys have to pay the same price.’

This was my conclusion. A person is a creature that is naturally endlessly desired when it is received without limitlessly. I didn't mean to be a pushover, and I didn't mean to take the damage. So I decided to draw a line on them from the beginning.

They help and cooperate with each other on an equal footing rather than simply protecting and caring for them. To do what one has to do in one's position, and to help each other. It was a concept and method of survival that humans have been doing since the beginning. If you say you can't do it, you'll get rid of them without hesitation.

When I finished explaining everything, Lee Hye-in bowed her head in surprise. His younger brother Lee Jin-soo also smiled relievedly with a scarred face, and soon bowed his head and thanked him. I told my brother and sister instead that I had a reason to move quickly and that there were two waiting parties.

And when I told you that I couldn't afford to walk you guys, Lee Hye-in's face was slightly worried. However, Lee comforted her sister and nodded her head firmly as if not to worry. Lee Jin-soo looked at me with a kind of friendly eyes as if he was a little touched.

It remains to be seen whether they trust each other. As with all human relationships, I finished thinking about judging the two by watching them slowly. I told my brother and sister to be ready to move and turned and walked toward the door.