Isekai Torippu Shita Sono Bade Taberarechaimashita
20: I've had the feeling that I'm no longer
I just had a good time.
After watching the store open, when I came back to my original location, my date with the captain was closed.
So I was waiting for the captain, a member of the Fifth Division guarding this town, and the captain is talking again.
I'm sneaking a peek at how it's going to be.
"Sakura, you can still watch town, okay?
"I already bought everything I wanted to buy. It's perfectly break time now."
"Instead, I've been looking at the captain for a long time."
Extra help!
'Cause, you know, it bothers me.
... the captain is talking to a woman.
At the end of my gaze, a slender, tall woman dressed in squad clothes.
I can tell from afar that you have a neat face. The platinum blonde making it a ponytail had such a beautiful color that it was a waste not to be drooling.
Adult women, so much so that alongside a masculine and good-looking captain, they don't suck.
Me and the captain can't even line up. Help me with my child-face too, I only look like an adult and a child.
Nice, nice.
Even though I'm taller than the average height of the Japanese, I'm smaller compared to the people over here.
The body line is so beautiful and I'm jealous of you for being like a model.
"She's the lieutenant. She's the platoon leader of the immediate unit. Don't worry, it's a business-like relationship with the captain."
As he distracted my gaze, Mr. Chartre brought his face closer from the side.
I wasn't getting anxious.
But when they laughed and said that, it was also true that it made me feel a little easier.
... Ugh, I've been distracted.
He's the one who went up to the captain and joined this squad.
"Billy!"
"Damn, you just said something serious"
Billy's words raised the discomfort of being unidentified, and I can't help but feel for myself.
Why do I feel so weird?
I like the captain, and the captain likes me.
I know that very well.
Then there shouldn't be anything wrong.
Why would I want to cry?
"Sakura, I don't care what Billy says."
"He said it's okay. Because I know."
Although I laughed back at Mr. Chartre, I'm not sure he laughed well.
It's kind of disgusting, as my heart is no longer.
Normally, I think he's jealous.
But with complex colored emotions that can't be represented by such a word.
I don't know how it's going to disappear now.
"Hey, I'm over there"
"Sakura?
I'll be back by the hour.
Speaking without looking back, I left the spot.
Because I wanted to be alone and chill my head.
"Uh, already... Billy, it's your fault"
"I don't know."
Though I thought I heard that voice from behind.
Already, full.
I couldn't even pay attention to other people.
I walked all the way to the residential and thoughtful places.
There are no shops around so they are not lively and unpopular. Sometimes one or two people are different.
But I don't care if people are around.
If no one knows me, so be it.
Stop at the edge of the road and look up at the sky with your back to the fence.
There was only one small cloud floating in the blue sky, pompous.
You're like me now, what an idea is just too humble.
"What's wrong, Sakura"
To the voices I heard, I did not respond.
I was wondering if you might come.
Because the captain is kind.
Because you can't leave someone in need, someone who needs help.
Such kindness hurts a little now.
"Don't try to be alone without land exploration at all."
Low and sounding, my favorite voice.
At first it was compelling and I was just a little scared, but I wonder since when I've always wanted to hear it.
Maybe that's not just because of my change of heart, but also because the captain's voice has been gentle.
"... what's going on"
You must have wondered at me for not making it faint.
With the inquiry, the footsteps approach.
I pointed my gaze up at the sky at the captain.
I laughed at the captain with a faint look on his face.
Wrinkles lean between the captain's eyebrows.
Oh, no. I knew it didn't seem to be laughing properly.
"Sakura?"
The captain calls my name.
A name that doesn't exist in this world.
Oh, no, it's not.
Because I'm not from this world.
That's why I'm so jealous.
Someone who lived normally in this world and could normally meet the captain.
One end of the thought, which had a lid on it, gave a glimpse of the female crew as a trigger.
Emotions that are close to jealousy, but more complex and dirty, and can't be helped.
I wonder why my captain and I lived in a different world.
I can't even imagine me being born and raised in this world.
Even the captain in the world over there, of course, can't imagine.
If it weren't for that way of meeting, the captain might not have been aware of me.
Because I'm a guest of the Spirit, I have one now, and I'm going to know it.
More, he wanted to make a natural encounter and make a natural love.
I have myself thinking that way.
"Something's messing up in my heart right now"
Wordless sprouts are all over your body.
Whatever you say, it's going to be a toge-togged poison, and it's going to unintentionally hurt the captain.
I wanted someone to tell me how to reconcile myself with this feeling.
Sometimes it's easier to spit it out.
That's how easy the captain said.
No, you can't, Captain.
I don't want to hurt the captain.
Because I know that the captain cares so much about me that he bothers and hurts me.
Even the captain understands that.
- Hey, Sakura. What can we do to avoid hurting the captain?
Ask yourself in your heart.
- I can't tell you the truth. Because it hurts the captain.
Yes, in my heart I answer.
Oh, well, that's right.
Then I wonder what to do.
I breathe heavily and vomit slowly.
Yeah, a tattoo.
I'm important to the captain, very important.
He said he didn't want to hurt the captain, how hurt he was.
If that's all you know, it's okay.
Deceive the captain. Let it deceive you.
"Just one thing, let me check"
After I said that, I turned my back on the captain.
Until the look on my face, I didn't feel like I could make it right.
"I'm the one who likes the captain, right? You chose me, not anyone else, didn't you?
The voice turned out to be less energetic than usual, but that's okay.
I'm sure it's because you're anxious.
I try to put my fingers together on my back and kick the stone under my feet.
Expect me to interpret it like it's a shade or something.
"Oh, it's just you"
A gentle voice comes down from the top.
I was hugged from behind, before I accidentally tried to raise my face.
A disappointing arm tangles up to let me go.
Even at a time like this, there's me relieved by the captain's plumage.
"I want you, who is no one else, to stay by my side."
That was the kind of word that enveloped my sprouts as well.
If the captain will tell you that I'm better than anyone else in this world, that it has to be me.
I wonder if it makes sense that I was a different world.
Even if the world you live in is different, no one in this world has to know what my name means.
Still wonder if I can stay here.
"If you're anxious, tell me. I'm not so sure."
That's a lie. The captain always guesses how I feel.
So I don't think I want you to worry too much.
"... it's okay now"
Don't let your voice tremble, I say in a small voice.
When I put it into words, I started to feel like I was just a little okay.
"What suits the captain is being an amazing woman. Just a little bit, I got jealous. But it's okay. Because I will try to be an adult woman worthy of the captain!
I smiled and looked back and told him to stand up.
Jealousy doesn't mean it's all a lie.
So I'm sure the captain will be deceived.
Yeah, no. Please deceive me.
I have nothing to worry about, because I want to be the one who's nagging the brain weather.
In front of the captain, I think so.
"You can stay where you are."
Eyes like the color of the sky before dawn, quietly, gently looking down at me.
The captain's words, his thoughts, crept through my mind.
I was wondering if you really knew all about my troubles.
As much as I feel like that.
"The captain is sweet."
Pompous and so spilled, I hug the captain from the front.
The wide breastplate gives me a soothing sense of security.
The captain is going to be very supportive of how much I leaned on him.
It makes me want to bump into all the sprouts that even I don't quite understand.
That's how I want you to spoil it.
I've never felt this way before.
I guess that means you're forgiving the captain his heart.
"Love makes people greedy."
"It must be obvious"
To my twinkle, the words that come back without my hair in between.
Naturally, I wonder.
Even though I know exactly how the captain feels, I want words.
Yet from the seriousness of the captain, he has turned a blind eye.
As much as the captain was talking to other women for a bit, I don't know.
I want to be sweet, I want to be sweet, I can't help it.
You can't tell the truth. You're deceiving, but you're healed by the captain's words.
I wonder if the captain accepts me for being so greedy and sloppy.
"Is the captain greedy, too?
I lift my neck as I look up at the captain.
Like I'm leaning on the captain, I wonder if the captain is a little sweet on me, too.
I feel like I'm just getting it, and it's painful.
I only have the feeling and body that I like what I can give the captain.
I wonder if I'm properly given what the captain wants.
"... oh"
After a little silence, the captain spilled some seemingly complicated smile.
The answer only reassured me a little.
"Uh, hey, you're with me"
When I laughed at him, the captain gave me head without saying anything.
If you two are getting greedy, well, I don't know.
I wonder if it's quite balanced.
Although the whole thing won't disappear.
Let's put that aside now.
It's better for mental health if you don't think about things you don't want to think about.
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