Leave A Scar

I walked out of the bedroom dressed and with the large blanket bundled in my arms. Ed was on the couch, and sneakily I peered over the back, seeing him continue to breathe, continue to sleep. But there wasn't a blanket on him. He was sleeping, completely exposed to the cold air.

Shock came to me, and I quickly fanned the blanket out above him, making sure it was covering him completely. The tips of his feet stuck out a little bit, and I struggled with the decision of pulling the blanket down and covering his socked toes or leaving as is and allowing his shoulders a bit more warmth. Ed shifted in his sleep, a tiny groan coming from him as his hand picked up the blanket's nearest end and pulled it closer to his face. Revealing a bit more of his socks and deciding for me. He sniffed, and I wondered if he had a cold coming on.

Guilt bloomed in my stomach as I padded over to the small kitchen, searching for some kind of tea I could make him. 

The door to my left opened, and with a tea bag in between two fingers, I looked over to see Al walk in. He stopped in the doorway, staring at Ed like he was surprised to see him on the couch.

"We're not behind schedule are we?" I asked in a whisper.

Al noticed me, and quickly shook his head. "N-no! I was just wondering why that blanket was on him!"

I paused, wondering why Al would be wondering such a thing. I turned back to the stove, putting the tea bag in the kettle and flipping the lid closed.

"He has others, doesn't he?" I asked.

Al smiled. "Is that what he told you?" He laughed a little, shaking his head. "He's never made a blanket in his life except for that one. He made it for you!"

My stare went to Ed again, still perfectly asleep with that giant blanket almost covering him completely. I felt a warmth in my stomach, one that felt like I actually had that blanket on me now...

Ed stirred, a groan floating from his furrowed lips. He sat up, blanket hanging off of one shoulder, and turned to us. Staring with one half-open eye. I guess it must have looked a little strange; Al and I standing by a tea pot, staring at him while his brother smiled and I blushed.

Ed tried to open both eyes, looking down at the blanket covering one side of his body. 

"Wh'dj 'ou put this on me for?" he asked, and I did everything in my power not to grin.

I failed, trying to hide my smile behind my hand as I leaned over towards Al. 

"Does he always talk like that after waking up?" I whispered.

Al giggled, obviously just as amused as I was. "Sometimes. Only after a really deep sleep."

With the blanket held over his shoulder by one hand, Ed stood up, stretching his eyes wide. He shuffled towards us, trying to wipe the sleep from his eyes.

"I gave this to you," he told me, voice a little less groggy. When he was close enough, the blanket was suddenly thrown at me. Landing directly on my head and over my face.

Ed continued on, feet padding past Al and I. "So keep it," he yawned.

I raised a hand, moving the edge of the blanket that was draped over one eye, glaring at him in half-play and half-actual irritation. 

Ed grinned, hands in his pockets as he leaned against the counter opposite of me.

"That's a good look on you," he said. "If we ever need to go undercover, we'll just throw that over your head and you'll be good to go!"

I almost laughed at that, but luckily the tea kettle sounded and interrupted my focus. I grabbed the blanket, sliding it forward and draping it over my arm again.

Ed stepped forward before I could do anything, two cups being held by one finger.

"Here," he took the kettle away from me, ignoring the look of irritation I shot him. "I'll do this while you put your blanket away. How do you like your tea?"

I grinned, padding over to the living room and realizing I kind of had the upper hand. "Make it how you want," I said, turning around to meet his lightly surprised gaze. I gestured to the blanket in my arms, lightly raising it. "I made it for you."

I caught a glimpse of pink in his face before he turned back to the kettle, setting down the two cups on the counter side-by-side. 

"Thanks," he replied quietly.

He sniffed again, the sound incredibly quiet but enough to make me turn back around.

"You're not coming down with a cold, are you?" I asked. 

Ed quickly shook his head. "No. I don't really get sick."

I found that a little hard to believe. I glanced down to the tea he was pouring into the mugs, and even though he wasn't looking at me I gestured to the cups with a nod.

"Well, I made that for you"--I couldn't help the small smile on my face--"In case you were getting sick."

I saw that blush come back, deepening in color. With a mug in his hands, he spun around to lean against the counter, raising the steaming cup to his lips. Trying to hide the color of his face, I think.

He took a sip, face clenching at the heat and warping the sound of his reply. "Thanks." He paused long enough to swallow and then continued on with a grin. "But I'm practically invincible, remember?"

Oh, I remembered all right. I shifted my weight to one foot, holding the blanket closer to myself.

"Said the blind guy who transmuted his own sight back."

Ed pointed a finger at me. "That's right! And don't you forget it!"

I couldn't fight down the smile as I rolled my eyes, turning around to find some place to put this giant blanket. Al was standing in front of Ed's suitcase, packing up the books he had been reading and organizing a little. I didn't look to see what he had laid out, instead watching as Al held a hand out to me. 

"I can put that in there," he said.

"Thanks!" I replied cheerily.

Al just nodded, helmet clicking at the motion, and I handed him the blanket, suddenly a bit worried. "But... Will it fit?"

Al just smiled at me, pushing the lid down with both hands and clicking a lock with one. "Don't worry about it," he said with a laugh. "We've worked miracles with getting things in here. Blankets are the least troublesome."

Ed scoffed lightly, and suddenly he was close behind, holding out my mug of tea. I reached out, taking the cup with both hands and watching his fingers unwrap from the handle, becoming inches away from mine. I mimicked his hold on the mug, listening to his reply—words spoken after light laughter.

"Yeah, like that time we tried to fit two days' worth of food? Didn't work out so well."

"When was that?" I asked, turning around as Al took the suitcase and stood upright.

Continuing to walk away from me, Ed glanced back, meeting my eyes for a moment before shrugging. 

"After the whole thing with Father. Little less than eight months ago, actually. We were up in Briggs again, searching for this Amulet."

And they didn't find anything. I felt my heart sink into my stomach, the larger organ rejecting the tea in my hands. I forced myself to take a sip. 

The herb-flavored water pooled in my tongue, allowing flavors to gently bloom and surround my tastebuds. I smiled, enough to genuine curve my eyes. He had added a little sugar to it. The perfect amount...

Hearing Ed's voice again, I turned around. With the tea still in one hand, he stepped into his boots, gently twisting each foot until it slipped inside.

"Start thinking about what you want for breakfast," he told me. "I'm paying."

As long as it wasn't champagne, I'd be fine. But I also wasn't about to let him pay.

"Mm." I raised the cup to my lips, feeling the steam curl against my face as I replied. "Think I'll sit extra close to the aisle this time. Make sure I get my money there first."

He grinned, and I grinned right back at him. He thought I was joking, too.

"Yeah," Ed scoffed, his grin still there as he shrugged his coat onto one shoulder. The cup was transferred to his other hand, allowing the other arm to slip through and the coat's front to be adjusted. "Just make sure you don't get distracted when the cart rolls up."

I wasn't sure if that was a threat or not, but I gave him my slyest look anyway, staring over the rim of the mug. 

"Make sure you don't get distracted either."

He just grinned a little more, and I caught sight of his cheeks tinting pink before I looked away. Heat rose to my face as well, and it wasn't from how close my tea was.

Traveling with them soon became comfortable, almost. Everything seemed to set into a rhythm; a type of lull that was nearly like spiritual lullaby.

I gently shook my head, not wanting to be dragged into a past life. I turned away from the window, looking up at Alphonse, who held the package of cards in hands that seems too big for someone so caring.

"You really don't know how to play?" he asked, continuing our conversation.

I tried to grin, feeling the smile almost twist downwards into a frown. "It's... Been a long time..."

Suddenly, Alphonse was waving a hand; the one that wasn't holding the card deck. "N-n-n-n-no! I didn't mean for that to come off as rude! I'm just surprised, that's all! You seem like the type of person who knows a lot about card games."

My interested perked a little. What did he mean by that?

But he was busy slipping the cards out of the holder and into his waiting palm, voice echoing out to me. 

"Gin's one of my favorites. I think you'll like it a lot!"

I did my best to smile in return, and then I noticed one of Ed's eyes had cracked open. The gold steadily watching me through slitted vision. I looked over at him, and instantly his eye closed again. Shutting that gold away.

I turned back to Al, picking my lips up into a good enough smile as he shuffled the cards again, explaining the rules as he did so. Words that vaguely sparked memories into my mind. I blocked them out, pretending like I didn't have a clue what he was saying as I nodded along to his instructions.

I noticed another smile hook onto Edward's face. I glanced at Al. It seemed like there was something going on between them.

"Is it... Is it a hard game?" I asked.

Al's eyes shrunk, hands raising in defense despite how they were each holding something. "No-no-no! It's not hard at all! You'll get it really quick, I promise!"

"Okay." I nodded, the relief in my voice.

Al started a game on the tables we had pulled out, dealing us each a row and beginning our first round of Gin. The game wasn't hard, just like Al promised. Soon, I was easily winning.

"Gin!" I exclaimed, putting down my hand. 

Alphonse paused, looking down at my cards. "Again?!"

At my large grin, a gleam came to his eyes. "Alright! I'm not going easy on you this time!"

My smile dropped, and I felt something of guilt at the fact that he had to go easy. But after registering what he just declared, a competitive flame sparked inside me, something I hadn't felt since I was little.

"Let's go!" I swiped up the cards. "New game, I'll deal."

I noticed a small smile on Edward's face and gently knocked his boot with the back of my hand.

"You're supposed to be sleeping." I told him.

He just let out a tiny groan, smile dropping into a frown as he turned towards the window more. I wondered if maybe Al and I were being too loud, but figured he probably wouldn't be smiling like that if we were bugging him.

I focused on shuffling, looking down at the cards as they shifted around parts of the deck in thin sections. Memories came back to me, the voice of my grandmother's instruction guiding my hands.

"Make sure you keep all cards with you, dear. Yes, just like that. Oh, so good, my fair one!"

My hands suddenly slipped from turning the cards around. Half of the deck spilled onto the table, turning an Ace of Spades and a Queen of Hearts over. I stared at the space between them, covered by the backs of one of the cards. I had forgotten about that nickname... She used to call me that because of the Snow White story. 

"Mirror mirror on the wall..."

My name sounded a bit like... 

Alphonse called to me. I looked up, hearing his voice echo as he continued.

"Are you okay?"

I saw Ed's eyes open again and I felt awful for interrupting his sleep. I nodded, regaining my composure.

"Of course!" I said, sweeping up the cards I had spilled. I resumed shuffling and started passing the right amount of cards between us. "Just getting too into this game, that's all! I'm definitely going to beat you again!"

Al giggled a little, happiness curving the lights of his eyes.

More than a few card games later, and even after Al teaching me another game, the food cart began to roll by.

Ed rose from his slumped position, arms stretching out as he yawned with a grin.

"Ahh, what a convenient time for me to wake up!"

"You probably weren't even asleep!" I retorted. He only sent me a slyer grin in reply before drawing his feet off of the seat next to me and onto the floor. The employee waiting for us didn't comment, seemingly not wanting to cause a fuss.

Ed leaned over, and I saw him squint at what was displayed. His narrowed eyes swept up to the employee. 

"You got any alcohol?"

"Edward," I glared. "It's bȧrėly two in the afternoon."

Ed just grinned at me again, seeming to be more than happy with prodding me like this. He leaned back, crossing his legs and waving a gloved hand.

"Just give us two lunch specials, please." 

The employee nodded, beginning to pull out sandwiches and drinks. I almost asked Al if he wanted anything before I remembered. The question died in my throat, a heavy depression sinking into my heart. How could he do this, keep smiling when he can't even do something as basic as eat? Where did that happiness come from?

My mind came back to me as Al suddenly held up a hand, dismissing the food being offered to him.

"Oh, none for me, thanks." he said.

The waitress moved her arm, sweeping the plate to me. I took it with both hands and a quiet thank you, staring down at the sandwich. A toothpick was inside it, a green olive staring back at me with its red eye.

"Thanks." Ed was leaning over, handing an excessive amount of money to Al, who handed it to the employee.

"Oh, thank you!" The woman gushed. "Let me know if you'd like anything else!"

"Yeah." 

Ed started wolfing down his sandwich, eating like he always did whenever food was around. I stared at mine still, raising it to my mouth and taking small bites. Al smiled happily, and I could only meet his eyes with my own hollowing ones.

It was a constant process, that hollowing. Constantly digging beneath the surface of myself, constantly making something rotten and whole into a shell. 

But I digress.

We continued searching, town stops filled with train rides filled with games and light conversation. After hearing a rumor of a new type of stone, we traveled to Youswell, meeting a boy named Kyle and his father. Kyle showed us the stone, but to our disappointment, it was something he had named "emerald" and possessed no power outside of a life-baring green color. 

It reminded me of their eyes. People I no longer spoke to. People that's fists knocked at my door, murmured voices speaking to one another before footsteps lead them away from my hunched posture. Like Ms. Silva had speculated when she noticed me, it was postulated that I had moved away. With him.

I felt tears breach my eyes, and I focused on the sting. It was dangerous, letting so much of the pain out. Letting it dangle over the edge of my eyelids like this. But it was nighttime, and I could use the pain to my advantage. 

All I had to do was break in order to rebuild.