Mixed Feelings

We reached his mansion; the car stopped and Enzo grabbed my hand, pulling me with him. I tried to pull my hand from his grip earning a glare from him. I just followed him behind letting him pull me. While he's dragging me through the living room, I noticed Judy standing in the living room smiling at me, I smiled back.

He opened the bedroom door and dragged me inside. "Stay," he said in a dangerous law voice.

I gulped and nodded. He still had that effect on me, god!!

He walked out, leaving me alone in this room. Everything rushed to me. Our memories in this room, our kisses and all. I sat down on the edge of my bed and cried my eyes out.

I heard a knock on the door. I wiped my tears and looked up to see Judy with a sad smile on her face. She walked to me and wrapped her arms around me, kissing my head. "I'm happy to have you back dear," she said, she looked down at me.

I smiled at her, looking at my face for a second her smile dropped and a frown made its way to her face. "What happened, dear?" With a worried expression, she asked.

"Nothing, nothing happened," I said, trying to smile, holding my face in her hands she made me look up at her, "Tell me, dear," she asked, with that, I burst into tears. "I don't want this, I don't want to marry him. I love him, I love him so much that it hurts, but the things he does scares me, I tried to forget about it but every time I look at him That scene flashed in front of me reminding me that he's a killer he kills people without any second thought how could I spent my life with a person like this...I want to help him I want to try my best to change him but how...How should I change him into a good person" I cried, hugging her. "Be strong, Venessa You have to be strong to change him. There is no way other than to marry him, I know Lorenzo he will do anything to get what he wants, you have to do things in his way, dear, let him do things just be patience Don't lose hope dear" She said wiping my tears, I stopped crying," You're right I have to do things in his way" I said and stood up from the bed, she took me to the dining hall and served me dinner, I had my dinner, and went to my room. Lying on the bed I was staring at the ceiling, thinking about the wedding. I do not understand how to stop the wedding and I want to do something, anything to stop this wedding. I don't want to marry at this age. Come on I'm just 19 I have ambitions which I have to fulfill.

I heard my doorknob opening, I quickly closed my eyes. I can hear someone walking to my bed, I tried to calm my breath. I can feel them sitting on the edge of my bed, I felt their hand stroking my hair. I quickly recognized his smell and his touch which leave Sparks on my skin, I heard him say "I miss you...Why did you leave me...It's a bad decision...I thought you will just be angry for a day or two, I thought you will come back to me but you didn't... Now...I will make you pay for it...I will make you pay for the pain you left me in...I will make you pay for leaving me alone...I will make you pay for everything I suffered being without you for 6months...I promise, I will'' he said kissing my forehead, I was scared, I want to run away from him but I couldn't. I heard him closing the door, I opened my eyes, his words were running in my head he will make me pay for everything? I was shivering with fear. What am I gonna do?

************

Next day I woke up because of constant knocking on my door, I groaned and got up from the bed, walking towards the door I opened it. There stood Judy with 3 other women, I was confused, I moved aside letting them in. "You should get ready dear, they will help you," Judy said,

"Ready?? For what?" I asked,

"Tonight is your Engagement," Said Judy,

"What!!!!" I exclaimed,

"Tonight.." She was repeating but I cut her off.

"I know I heard you But you decided that tonight is our engagement," I asked, I was very angry.

"Lorenzo," she said,

"This man" I muttered,

"Please leave, I need to fresh up," I said, Judy, nodded and left my room with them.

I walked into my bathroom and did my morning routine, I did my hair and makeup and dressed up. I walked outside into the living room, There I saw Enzo sitting on the sofa and talking to one woman and 3 men who were standing with her, they were listening to him very carefully, He saw me walking to the dining room and called me, I turned to him.

"Come here," he said,

I gulped and walked to him, everything he said last night was running in my mind. I was very scared, "yes," I said, Tuning to them he said "you can do your work now," they nodded and left us. He turned to me with a very serious expression on his face, "I heard, you a have problem with the engagement" he asked,

"I..I h..have..problem...Its...to..to..soon" I shuttered,

He grabbed my jaw and pulled me until his face was a mere inch from mine, "Our engagement will happen today, whether you like it or not," he said and pushing me back, I stumbled back, tears were rolling in my eyes, I controlled myself and turned around, began to walk back to the dining table, "Venessa," he called, I turned around to face him, "Do not try to act smart you know very well what I'll do If you do so," I nodded and walked back to the dining table. Is this Enzo who was in love with, he turned into a completely different person who I don't recognize. Swallowing my sorrow I had my breakfast after my breakfast, those 3 women with Judy came to me, I sighed, getting up from my bed. We walked outside of the mansion and Paul was waiting for us outside. I smiled at him and hugged him, "How are you paul?" I asked,

He smiled "I'm good, How are you Vannesa?"

"I'm good" I replied,

We climbed inside the car and drove out of the mansion, we reached a shopping mall and stepped out of the car. We walked inside.

********

It took 4 hours to complete our shopping, I was exhausted. I walked outside of the 9th mall we walked into,  Judy with them was at the cash counter. Paul opened the door, I climbed inside and drank a bottle of water. I relaxed a bit, "Paul" I called, he turned to me. "Yes," he said, "How was he...in the past 6 months," I asked a bit hesitant, He signed "He wasn't himself, he turned into a completely different person. He was very aggressive and was drank all night, He was broken. He never smiled the way he used to with you, He never came out of his office. He buried himself in alcohol, sometimes I find him passed out on the couch and on the ground. His behavior changed towards everyone He was angry, snappy and screamed at everyone including his parents"

He sighed again, "I know him, he will have his revenge from you Vannesa, you should be strong to handle him don't let him break you, dear," He said,

I swallowed, there were so many things running in my head. Why the hell everyone is scaring the hell out of me, I took a deep breath, you are strong Venessa don't let him down your self-confidence and dignity. You can handle him.

Judy with them stepped inside the car, we drove back to the mansion. After reaching the mansion, Paul brought the shopping bags inside. Inside, the living room was full of people hurrying. They were busy doing their work that they didn't notice any of us working inside. They were walking past us decorating the living room, I walked directly into my room and noticed people cleaning my room, I was getting irritated by this. I turned around and stepped outside the room, I walked straight out of the mansion, I walked into the garden and sat down on a stone bench, I sighed and raised my head up. "God!"

My mind automatically reminded me of him, His face, His smile and his arrogant smirk. I miss him, his touch on my skin, his breath on my neck, his deep voice which gives me goosebumps, his hugs, everything. I never thought I would fall madly in love with a man like him.

The things Paul said made me regret my decision of leaving him, I was wrong I should have given him a chance to talk, This is all my fault. Because of me, he turned into a completely different person. I have to change him, but not like this I can't marry him. This is not the only option. There has to be another way to change him. I understood why he wants to marry me. I heard him say that last night, he wanted me to suffer just like he suffered the last 6months, I suffered too. It wasn't easy for me to live without him. I love him, I wanted to run back to him but I know I can't do that, I thought he'll come back, he'll explain things to me, he'll promise me he would never do that again, but it never happened, he never came. I waited and waited for him. One day he came back with what? A contract to marry him, This is ridiculous.

Judy came to me breaking my chain of thoughts, "Vennessa What are you doing here?" She said I looked up at her, " You Should go inside and get ready before Enzo sees you here" I sighed and got up from the bench, "What time is it?" I asked her,

"It's past 7," she said,

I gasped, "Go fast you don't have time to get ready, Engagement party starts at 8"

She took inside of the mansion and inside my room, my room. She pushed me inside the shower, after my shower, she made me sit on the chair called someone. 4 women one entered inside with a dress, they put it on my bed and walked over me, They started working on my makeup and hair, then after that they made me stand up, one of them with black hair took the dress and opened it, they helped me in wearing it. The dress was a burgundy red lace elegant mermaid long floor-length formal dress. Off-the-shoulder neckline with long sleeves, Court train. It perfectly fitted my curves, I moved to the mirror to have a look at myself. I gasped. I was looking at my reflection with my mouth hung open, I looked back at them. "Thank you," I said,

Judy stepped forward and kissed my forehead, "you look beautiful dear" she said, "Thank you" I said smiling at her. Elie, one of the women who helped me in getting ready, brought my soft dove 5 inches sandals. I wore them. Judy took my hand and led downstairs when I reached the stairs everyone heads snapped to me. Hall was filled with numerous people I know saw in my life. I was feeling nervous my hold Judy's hand tightened. It was completely silent the only sound was made by my scandals. I lowered my head and stepped down very carefully, after reaching the last one Judy stopped and looked up to see Enzo looking so hot in his black tux, extending his hand I took it and I stepped down.

Antia stepped forward in her looking elegant in her red strapless dress, she turned around facing the people." Hello Everybody, My name is Antia Francisco younger sister of Lorenzo Francisco and a close friend of Venessa Foster, I welcome you all here tonight to celebrate the engagement of my brother Lorenzo Francisco and Venessa Foster, Thank you for coming to share this milestone event. It means so much to all of us that you're here at the occasion marking the beginning of their life long commitment, Let the ceremony begun" She turned towards her brother, Enzo took a violet box and opened it, inside was a beautiful diamond ring. He took it and took my hand. I wanted to take my hand back but he held it firmly. He placed the ring in my finger, Judy gave me a red box, I opened it and placed the ring in his finger with shaking hands and then everybody started clapping.

He turned and placed his hand around my waist, pulling me towards him. He moved closer to my ears and whispered "smile". I plastered a fake smile on my face. The flashes were hitting me pretty badly. Standing so close to him gave me nostalgia yet my heart was racing with anxiety and fear.

Later, Everyone was enjoying the party. Antia walked over us and gave an engagement toast saying "Me and my brother shared a strong bond by birth, I grew up learning different things from him, I love my brother more than anything. I am so happy today to be able to congratulate my brother Enzo and his beautiful fiancee Venessa, I have always believed that there is someone out there for everyone and today my brother found his and now, ladies and gentlemen, may I ask you to rise and join me in wishing the charming couple health and happiness" she said and kissing me on my cheek and hugging her brother.

Everyone raised their glasses and toasts with Antia, I see Edoardo walking to us, smiling at us. He stopped by us and turned toward them," Hello everyone, I'm Edoardo Francisco Thank you all for coming to celebrate my Son's engagement.[he turned to Enzo, Smiled] My Son as you've grown and matured, you have brought more joy and happiness to our lives than we ever believed possible. Now that you are entering this new phase of life, we wish you the same pleasure that you have given to us, and a lifetime filled with blessings and happiness. Having you as a son has been one of life's greatest gifts. Today, we begin to share our blessings with Andera. May the two of you know happiness beyond your wildest dreams. Please raise your glasses with me in a toast (pause) to Enzo and Venessa"

Then, Andera came forward and hugged him and me, she kissed my forehead and turned "When children find true love, parents find true joy. Here's to your joy and ours from this day forward. I'm so happy that you found a girl like Venessa Son, May your joys be as bright as the morning and your sorrows but shadows that fade in the sunlight of love. please join me raise your glasses with me in a toast to my son and Venessa" she said, tears were rolling down my cheeks. I could not express what I'm feeling right now.

Enzo turned to me holding my hands, my heart was beating rapidly in my rib cage, My legs were trembling, "There's something very special that happens to a man when he realizes that he's met the woman that he's going to spend the rest of his life with. I think it's called fulfillment. When that moment comes, the words can't come out fast enough. Thank you, baby, for agreeing to be my wife and seeing the goodness in me. I'd like to thank my future parents-in-law for bringing into the world, the woman that I love. (toasts) Please raise your glasses with me in a toast for my Venessa" he said,

" I'm so happy that you both are back and marrying each other Venessa, I thought you would never forgive him, Thank you so much for giving a chance dear," she said holding my hands in her, I wanted to yell that I don't want to marry him, I wanted to tell her that he was forcing me to marry him. But I didn't, I know the consequences of doing that, I just smiled at her.

Music began playing and every couple was dancing on the dancefloor, I was standing beside Enzo. He was talking to someone I don't know, I was looking at a couple. They were so good with each other, they were smiling and dancing. I can see the love in their eyes for each other. Suddenly Enzo put his hand on my waist and led me to the dance floor. He placed him firmly around my waist pulling me closer to him. I tried to put some space between us but he pulled me even closer, my chest was touching him, I looked up in his eyes, he was staring at me. We were dancing slowly, lost in each other's eyes, he bends down to my ear "Don't be so happy, There is a surprise for you in our bedroom...little Wifey" He whispered in my ear slightly biting it, My heart was beating rapidly, my legs were shaking. Everything he said last night rushed back to me, I looked up to see him smirking at me.