Chapter 13: Presently, Taking Leave
The day after drinking with Father, I woke up in my room.
Looking out from the window, the eastern sky was shining.
The city was silent, with a slight chill in the air.
I’d usually sleep in this early in the morning.
There’s still time before breakfast.
I got up and changed.
Feeling refreshed.
My mind and body, both completely fresh.
"I want to follow Pax."
I told Father and received his blessings, clearing the cloud casted over my head the past year.
I don't know how much I can help Pax.
Maybe I’ll be a drag for him instead.
But I want to at least see him in action.
"Ah!"
Well, I hold expectations for Pax as well.
I want to see where his future holds.
What kind of nation will he create, what kind of talent will he collect, who will he marry, and what kind of person will he become...
I want to see.
No matter the kingdom, talents, marriage, or the person he becomes.
I just want to witness his future.
Surely, that was the same as Father’s “expectations” as well.
That’s why Father held his silence for so long.
To me, big sis, big brother, to small sis.
"Dad is really amazing."
It suddenly dawned on me.
Father never did interrupt me.
He only asked for one thing.
"Make sure to say proper goodbyes to everyone.”
Today, I’ll make sure to do that.
□
I got down to the first floor.
First to fill my stomach.
Perhaps now with a clear mind, I felt particularly hungry this morning.
When I was attending Magic University, I used to have a large appetite, but I haven’t had much of one lately.
Don't eat in the morning, eat a little before noon, and eat a little before the evening. Such was life.
But today I wanted to eat my fill, first thing in the morning.
I feel good today.
It won’t hurt to help White Mama and grandma with breakfast once a while.
"...Oh."
When I entered the dining room, I was met with three pairs of eyes.
White Mama, Blue Mama, and Red Mama too.
All three were in the dining room and turned toward me, all at once.
"Morning."
"Good morning. You’re early today."
"Good morning."
Each greeting their own way.
Looking back, it's been a long time since I saw the three mothers together.
Do they always eat breakfast together? I don't know either, since I haven't had breakfast for so long.
I took my seat.
Usually, if they were all together, I would run away, but today there was no reason to escape.
"Sieg. You came back with Rudy yesterday, went drinking together?"
"Yup."
"Rudy was especially merry yesterday, something good happened?"
White Mama asked, taking the initiative.
Maybe she already heard from Father last night.
"I told my dad about my worries this past year."
"No wonder Rudy’s so happy.”
Said Blue Mama.
“Rudy was always so worried about Sieg.”
"Really?"
“Yeah, occasionally during breakfast, he would look up the ceiling and say, ‘Sieg’s not coming down today either?’”
"Oh…"
"I think he’ll sleep for a while longer today. It's been a while since he drank that much."
Because I always avoided Father...
Maybe I did something terrible to Father.
"So, what were you talking about?"
Red Mama asked.
Too impatient, she wanted to know what I talked to my father about and what conclusion we came to.
"Um... starting with the conclusion?”
"I prefer that."
"I would like to help a friend in the Kingdom of the Dragon King. It might take a decade or two, maybe even more. I might never return here again."
I’m going to help Pax and witness his future.
But Pax's ambitions are enormous.
He wants a territory of his own, to become independent, to create a new nation.
Not a job for a couple years.
A decade, two decades...
Or maybe when he and I are both dead, a legacy for the next generation to fulfill.
"Is that so..."
The Mothers looked saddened.
Particularly White Mama, her lips bitten red, her eyes a dam near bursting.
In comparison, Red Mama remains her usual-self.
"Is that friend the one you must protect?"
"Yes."
"Now that you made up your mind. Do you best!”
Red Mama said with a smile.
The first time I saw her smile in a long time.
These days, I only saw her frowns.
Of course. Because I fell stagnant.
Red Mama always taught us siblings to "protect someone important."
My conclusion was exactly as she taught me.
"So you decided you won’t marry Sariel?"
Blue Mama asked.
I responded.
"Yeah. I'd like to remain friends with Sariel. Sorry for wasting all the marriage prospects that Blue Mama sought for me.”
"No, it's fine. As I always said, you live as you like. If you found your own path, follow it."
Blue Mama said with a smile.
Her lessons were, “Live as your heart desires. If you have a problem, just ask for help.”
That teaching I haven’t followed lately, until my talk with Father.
Indeed, living our own path is the way to a happy life.
“The house will get quiet with Sieg leaving.”
White Mama was near tears.
My birth mother.
Big sis that married off to the Holy Land of Millis, we’re both her children.
If I leave, both of us will be gone.
Even as an unemployed mouth to feed, White Mama always made breakfast for me.
When not on holiday, she always cooked and prepared breakfast.
Even when I came home late from playing ally of justice, she would sometimes get out of bed to welcome me home.
"Mama, he was my first real friend at Asura Kingdom. That's why I want to go give him a hand."
"Yeah, I know. If friends are in a pinch, you must go."
White Mama wiped away her tears and smiled.
Ever since when we’re young, she had always earnestly exhorted us to “make friends and don’t bully the weak.”
I admired the ally of justice because of my father, Cheddarman.
But it may be because of her that I thought Cheddarman was so cool.
"So I’ll be going now."
Looking over them three, I said again.
"Thank you for supporting me thus far."
Hearing those words, White Mama could hold back no longer, a flood of tears.
Originally Red Mama and White Mama both looked self-satisfied. But when they saw White Mama in that state, they tried to console her haphazardly.
“Don’t cry?”
“Sieg’s leaving, so see him off with a smile.”
Still in tears, White Mama said to them.
"I'm just glad that Sieg is finally moving forward.”
Feeling ashamed, I waited for my mother to stop crying.
□
Afterwards, the Mothers went to make breakfast, hand in hands.
Even Red Mam, who seldom cooks, went in the kitchen.
During breakfast, I told my grandmas that I’d be going abroad.
Both grandmas stroked my head gently, after hearing my decision.
Father, still with his head full of bed hair, smirked when he saw that.
There were two missing from the breakfast table.
Lara, my older sister, and Lily, my younger sister.
They seem to sleep at work rather often.
I'll have to talk to them as well.
So, after finishing breakfast, I decided to go to Magic University.
My last time visiting the Magic University.
The campus where I studied for many years, one I visited regularly even after graduating.
A place where there are bitter memories, but fond memories as well.
"Ah!"
While walking down a hallway on campus, I met a girl I recognized.
The girl that married the fat nobleman.
"Hey!"
"Oh, hey, Sieg-kun."
She was not crying underneath the stairs like before.
On the contrary, she was smiling, surrounded by friends.
She seemed to be fine.
"How are you doing?"
"Ah? Yes, I'm doing well."
“But you were crying so terribly not too long ago?”
"Oh... about that... When I actually got married, it was a little different than I thought."
"Oh?"
"Sure, he’s a bit older and not much to look at, but surprisingly a pleasant guy after we talked a bit.”
"Is that so?"
"He’s a bit of a pervert, but I appreciate that he’s always working to keep me entertained. He is also giving me a lot of leeway, like allowing me to continue attending school. The situation at home turned out better than I expected as well. There are many other wives in a similar situation to me. With everyone so gracious and considerate, I’ll have to do my best as well…”
Ah, so it’s like that.
A noble’s sensibility, throwing money around to help acquaintances without self-regard.
Father and Sensei both rated him highly.
Only deducting points for his lower half.
Not someone I should be beating up.
“Shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.”
"Yeah..."
Before I go with Pax, I owe him an apology.
I thought.
□
I arrived at Lara's research lab.
One knock.
"Come in~"
A familiar voice from inside.
However, not Lara's voice.
"Oh, big brother!"
Lily was in the room too.
Playing with a magic tool as usual.
Before her, lounging in her favorite chair, Lara was studying magic circles on a piece of paper.
"Rare for Lily to be here. What the occasion?"
"I have been here since yesterday! Hey, check this out!"
What Lily showed off was something I didn’t recognize.
It had a rough round shape, but with a few corners here or there.
Not quite a ball, if it hit you, it’d be painful.
Based on the magic circle drawn on various places, it’s probably a magic tool.
"I don’t know what it is.”
"That's right! I don’t know what it’s used for either! Isn’t it cool?”
"Oh... huh?"
"Big Sis Lara found it in the market and didn't know either, so I've been studying it all this time!”
Lily sure is eager.
I don’t get it.
Anyways, does that mean she's been staring at this ridiculous thing since yesterday?
"Lily, did you skip out on work again?"
"No, this is part of the job!"
She insisted.
Why wasn’t she fired yet? Nepotism? Because she’s a Greyrat? Or does she actually produce results?
Whatever.
"Sieg."
Lara, who looked a bit haggard, looked up at me.
"Why are you here?"
Her usual tone.
I would always say to kill time.
"Saying my goodbyes."
Lily looked surprised, but Lara kept her usual sleepy expression.
"Ah, how simple."
"Huh? Oh, yeah."
Somehow big sis was rather cold.
No, that’s just her usual self.
As usual, she’s ambivalent with whatever happens with me.
I felt a little hurt.
“Well, I decided to go to my friend at the Kingdom of the Dragon King, so I might never return.”
I put it succulently.
Then, Lily switched from shock to anger.
Not quite what I expect.
Well, I just made up my mind yesterday, and already am telling my goodbyes today, so it’s understandable.
"What happened to become my assistant?"
"Huh? I never agreed to that.”
“But Big brother Sieg is strong, can ride a horse, and knows how to pamper me. You’re the best person to be my assistant!”
"Thank you the high evaluation."
"I told the Chief that I would hire a newcomer next year. What should I do?"
I do not know either.
"No luck this time."
"Well, what should I say to the Chief?"
"I guess tell him that the person ran away?”
At least I never consented to this.
“I thought for sure you’d be short on money eventually and come begging to be my assistant... tsk~”
Lily started playing with her magic tool again, pouting.
Even though I said we might not meet again, that’s her reaction!
Well, that’s Lily for you, I suppose.
I turned toward Lara.
Her usual self.
With her chin atop Leo’s back, looking drowsy. With a “Huff ╭(╯╰)╮” she looked back.
"Big Sis Lara doesn’t look too surprised.”
"I thought it would happen sooner or later.”
Did you see it with your fortune-telling?
I wish you could have told me if you did...
But if she did, would I have followed her instruction?
Probably not.
After all, before my talk with Father, I never made up my mind.
"So why the sudden change of heart?”
“Let me explain...”
I explained the sequence of events, how one thing led to another.
What happened, Pax’s background.
Why I was under a cloud.
And how after talking to Father, it all cleared up for me.
What my heart desires.
Lara and Lily listened quietly without interrupting me.
"I feel glad that I talked with Dad."
“Until Lucy got married, she always misunderstood Dad as well, because dad was always so lenient on us.”
"Ah... yes."
Father was always lenient with us.
Too lenient.
I didn't realize it until now.
Indeed, bigger sis finally had a heart-to-heart with Father only after getting married.
Maybe because it was only then, like I am now, she realized Father’s feelings.
“So you’re not doing that anymore?”
"That?"
Big Sis asked abruptly, causing me to raise my head.
"Cheddarman!"
"Oh…"
Oh right, Lara knew what I was doing.
"I won't do it anymore"
"Not anymore?"
"It was like... just a way to vent and pass time."
Cheddarman. Moon Knight. An Ally of Justice.
It’s not like I don’t know what I was doing. Reflecting on it now, in a way, I was searching for my true self.
I couldn’t do what I really wanted to do, so I did what I didn’t want to instead.
Then tricking myself into thinking that it was what I wanted all along.
"What's the story?"
Lily tilted her head and asked.
"Sieg, behind the scenes, was playing ally of justice! Beating up bad guys and feeling all proud about himself.”
"Oh, so that’s why you always came back late at night."
"Ally of Justice. He called himself Moon Knight… Pretty lame, right?”
"Oh yeah! The Chief once said to avoid resisting if Moon Knight shows up. Nothing more valuable than your life, he said.”
I'm not a robber.
I have never asked for money, obviously.
I just started punching without asking questions instead.
Still, Uncle Zanoba doesn’t look like a bad person, but maybe he has a dark secret somewhere?
"So that’s it. Brother was doing that behind my back.”
"Yeah..."
“Brother always said you wanted to be an ally of justice since when we were kids, and I did get a lot of help over the years. I get it.”
She understood.
Indeed, I helped Lily out often.
As a natural airhead, she’s an easy target for the bad guys.
"Sieg."
Lara was looking at me while holding her chin.
“No more helping others, so you’re choosing to be a bad guy instead?”
"No, I don't think I'll stop helping people, but I won't hide anymore. I'll proudly help those who want help."
"I see."
Lara studied my face.
And said.
"Sieg is surprisingly clever today."
A rare smile appeared.
Somehow, it’s been ages since I saw Lara’s smile.
"So that’s why, I will be leaving soon."
Lara didn’t call me stupid today.
That alone makes coming by today worthwhile.
At last, Big Sis finally acknowledged me for myself?
"Big Si Lara. Thank you for letting me use this room until now, and thanks Lily for always worrying about me.”
"I wasn’t that worried… But I’ll miss my big brother. I don’t get to leave late anymore.”
"No, you shouldn’t be late even if I’m here.”
I'm not your horse.
Certainly, I did give you rides often.
I smiled wryly at Lily’s words, then it was Lara’s turn.
"Sieg. Even after going far away, and after many years, we’ll always be brothers and sisters. Remember that."
Even if we say our goodbyes, it's only distance that separates us.
Our relationship would never change.
Maybe after half a century, big brother Ars and little sis Chris may no longer be with us.
But Lara, Lily, bigger sister Lucy, and I all shared mothers with longer-lives.
Or perhaps Pax will achieve his goals in mere decades, while everyone's still alive.
If not, with the twists of fate who knows what might happen.
Because I became like this. Something might happen among us siblings as well.
As long as we help each other when one gets in trouble.
Like when Lara helped me... no, she didn't help much, but she did understand me.
"Yeah, I know."
"Okay."
When I answered, Lara nodded with satisfaction.
□
Then I visited people in the market district.
The old man at the fruit stand, the old man at the liquor store.
And many other acquaintances as well.
When I told them I’m leaving town, they all said their regret.
However, no one asked me to stay.
If I’m in a pessimistic mood, maybe I’m surprisingly not well liked…
“We also, when we saw how Sieg just hung out all day, felt it wasn’t ideal. But you finally found your calling, so we feel at ease as well.”
But hearing that, the opposite seems to be the case.
"Thank you for taking care of us."
I was thanked by even those I didn't recognize.
Father said, even if I was playing-pretend I still saved people. They must be among them.
If so, I might feel a little lonely to leave this town.
"Oh!"
"Ah!"
A man stood out among the crowd.
A man who works the market by day and drinks and sells information at the bar by night.
Yes, it was Georges.
"Hey, Georges"
“Ah, son of Greyrat House, thanks for your patronage, but please don’t call me Georges.”
"Please don't say that. Weren’t we friends? Haven’t we hung out everyday?”
“No no, for you to consider someone like me a friend, I’m really grateful, but…”
Georges looked away.
He probably thought he would never see me again.
I put my arm around his shoulder.
"It's because of you, I could move forward. Thank you."
Then, after taking a serious look at me, George laughed.
"...I see. That’s good. But now that my work’s done, my prospects look terrible. How are you gonna pay me back?”
"My sister is looking for an assistant. She might hire you if I recommended you.”
"Really?"
"And if you sell information gained as her assistant to my dad, you might do rather well for yourself?”
"Hey, not a bad idea!"
Georges laughed, wrapping his arm around my shoulder as well.
"I've had a lot of fun this past year."
He said and laughed.
□
Finally, I visited Sensei.
Sensei sat with his back towards the entrance, just as he did the other day.
However, he doesn't seem to be training.
“That face… looks like you still can’t go up against Dark Shadow?”
Sensei said, his back facing me.
Of course, without turning his head either.
If you're going to recite that line, at least turn around first!
And Father is Moon Shadow, not Dark Shadow.
“So... you still find the sword necessary, didn’t you?”
Teacher lifted something.
My sword.
Sensei held my beloved sword in his hand.
It should have been left in my room...
Did you bring it yesterday too?
"Yes, now is time for you to wield this sword! For justice, for defeating the greater evil!"
The teacher turned around with great vigor.
Shouting cheerfully while making various poses.
“I shall pass down to you, the final mystery of North God Style! And the title of the Emperor! So get ready...!"
"..."
Silence followed.
Apparently, the narrative created by Sensei and Father diverged slightly.
Father wanted to talk to me, but Sensei thought differently.
He really wanted to drag me onto the path of a hero.
Father who wished for me to find my own way; Sensei who wished to direct me towards the righteous path.
I can’t say which is better.
A difference in teachings.
“Ah, that look, you finally figured out something…”
Anyhow, looking at me, who remained silent, Sensei realized.
“Wait, you won…? Against Rude... I mean, great villain Dark Shadow?”
“Huh? No, it’s not like I won but…”
“Wow, beating him with bare hands… That guy really goes easy on his son… throwing the match like that… mumble mumble...”
After mumbling to himself for some time, he suddenly clapped his hands.
Perhaps some bad idea came to mind.
“Sieg-kun, you have successfully defeated Dark Shadow, but he’s merely the tip of that evil iceberg. Now, go and seek Lightning. That’s right, if you don’t defeat Lightning, evil cannot be defeated!”
it was useless after all.
"He’s at--"
"Sensei, I won't be going."
In a stronger tone than usual, I interrupted Sensei.
That confused Sensei.
"…Why?"
"Because there is another place I must go."
"Where is it?"
The tone of the teacher was surprisingly gentle, unlike earlier.
"To my friend."
"...Is your friend in a pinch?"
"I don't know. But once upon a time, he asked for my help. I remembered, and now I must go.”
I only said that much.
It’s getting a bit tedious, giving the same explanation over and over again, and all the details would probably go over Sensei’s head anyways.
"I see... will you need the sword there?"
But Sensei seemed to get that much.
As expected of Sensei.
"I’ll need it. If you can return it to me, I’d appreciate it.”
"Alright."
Senei said, sheathing the sword and passing it to me.
A heavy blade.
My beloved sword, custom-made by world-famous blacksmith Ore God for Father, perfect for my superb strength,
The blade is jet black, like obsidian, and blends into the darkness at night.
Only a reflection of moonlight as proof of its existence, for which Dragon God Orsted granted the title “Moon Glitter.”
Moon Blade.
"Sieg."
"Yes."
"I'm not very good with words, and I’m not very smart.”
"I agree."
"So let's practice till the end."
"Can you teach me a special move?"
"No, there's no such thing. Just our usual training."
"Yes."
I wore the sheath on my belt, then unsheathed the blade.
At that moment, the lesson began.
North God style training, no starting sound required.
Sparring after a long absence.
I tried my best to hit Sensei.
And, as a matter of course, I lost.
At the end of the day, I was taken by Sensei to a place.
Owned by a friend of Sensei.
The person was very rich, fat, and a noble.
When I apologized for the other day, he forgave me with a smile.
Even though he looked like a villain and rather crude, he welcomed me with warmth and politeness.
Just like Father, Sensei, and his newly wed wife said, aside from being a slave to his desires he’s not a bad guy.
I didn’t heed Sensei’s third lesson, "Do not judge justice or evil by their appearance."
"You will surely become a hero."
On the way home, Sensei said.
Abruptly.
Sensei and I had various discussions about heroes and allies of justice over the years.
There was always a gap in the conversation.
Sensei who aimed to be a hero, and I who aimed to be an ally of justice.
They seem similar, yet they’re apart.
It is natural that there would be a gap.
"I don't think so."
"What do you think a hero needs?"
When I heard this phrase before, I replied, "The ally of justice never regrets his choices."
In response, the teacher said, "Heroes are the ones who chooses after suffering their choices."
"From the distress of making that choice?"
"Yes, I wanted to be a hero, but it wasn’t possible. No matter how much I stressed over it.”
I was the opposite.
An ally of justice, yet still suffered.
Suffering, distressed, unable to make a choice.
Yet in the end I did choose.
Indeed, from an objective point of view, it is certainly a hero-like behavior.
"You can be a hero. Not an ally of justice, but a hero."
Sensei cannot be a hero, and I cannot be an ally of justice.
Instead, Sensei is more like a friend of justice.
"My disciple."
"Sir!"
"Can you inherit your master's will?"
"..."
I shook my head quietly.
"Senei will still live for a long time, so I will not inherit it now. Sensei, please continue to strive as well."
"...That's true. I'll do it!"
Sensei stated, without showing any signs of distress.
□
The next day, I made preparations for leave.
Goodbyes were made yesterday, so I had no lingering regrets.
Finally, after waving off my Mothers, I left.
Each mother left me with their own advice.
Father, having left early that morning, was no longer here.
I was hoping for a few last words, but it can't be helped.
So I walked through town.
My mother said I could ride a horse halfway, but I wanted the walk.
The market where adventurers and day-merchants hang out.
The shopping district where mid-scale merchants do their business, flowers in full bloom.
The smoke-filled manufacturing district, with an unceasing sound of blacksmithing clanging.
And the Magic University with its enormous campus.
These were the scenery of my everyday life. Witnessing them one last time, I was deeply moved.
Then I arrived at the gate.
The walls of the Magic City Sharia, my home.
The gate was wide open.
Beyond the gate, by the side of the road, a man sat.
A middle-aged magician wearing a gray robe.
Father.
When he found me, he stood up, dusted off the hem of his robe, and came over.
"Hey, Sieg"
"Dad, what are you doing here?”
"I'm seeing you off."
"Couldn’t you see me off at home like mama?”
"I thought it’s better here."
I think it would be good anywhere...
But is that so?
He probably figured I would leave from the front gate.
So he waited for me here.
"Thank you. I wanted Dad to see me off."
"Why, of course! because my son is going on a long journey.”
He said, lifted a bag by his side and turned to me.
I received it. It was about the size of a human head and rather heavy.
I had a bad feeling.
But first, let's check the contents.
"Dad, this..."
It was a black helmet.
A full-face helmet with a crescent emblem on the forehead.
Ally of Justice, Moon Knight Helmet.
"Take it with you."
"Why…?"
"You have been doing something different from what you wanted in the past year, but not everything was wasted."
What was wasted?
Certainly, there was a sense that this year had been a waste.
If I had talked to my father earlier, it would not have happened.
"If you have any trouble in the future, look at the helmet and remember. You might find an answer hidden in that ‘wasted’ time.”
He said and looked behind me.
I looked back as well.
Beyond the gates of Magic City Sharia.
Beyond that gate, the streets where I spent my decades.
When I came back from Royal Aura Academy, the cityscape had changed a lot.
But many things that remained the same.
Small sis and big sis unchanged, and my mothers unchanged.
Sensei as well.
How I viewed my father had changed a lot.
But that was my own misunderstanding.
If time so wasted helped resolve that misunderstanding, then it probably wasn’t a waste.
"I see. I'll bring it with me."
“Oh, also, you could use it there too. It’s pretty sturdy, after all.”
“Ahahah, then I might. Maybe if I find a person on the side of justice, I’ll lend it to him.”
"In that case, I'll send you four more."
Father laughed.
Humored by the idea of a Moonlight Squadron.
I didn’t think it was very funny, but it must have tickled him in some way.
I laughed as well.
After sharing a laugh, I said.
"I'll go now."
"Yes, do your best."
My father pat me on the back, as if pushing me forward, to my leave.
Leaving my hometown, toward my friend--
The day after drinking with Father, I woke up in my room.
Looking out from the window, the eastern sky was shining.
The city was silent, with a slight chill in the air.
I’d usually sleep in this early in the morning.
There’s still time before breakfast.
I got up and changed.
Feeling refreshed.
My mind and body, both completely fresh.
"I want to follow Pax."
I told Father and received his blessings, clearing the cloud casted over my head the past year.
I don't know how much I can help Pax.
Maybe I’ll be a drag for him instead.
But I want to at least see him in action.
"Ah!"
Well, I hold expectations for Pax as well.
I want to see where his future holds.
What kind of nation will he create, what kind of talent will he collect, who will he marry, and what kind of person will he become...
I want to see.
No matter the kingdom, talents, marriage, or the person he becomes.
I just want to witness his future.
Surely, that was the same as Father’s “expectations” as well.
That’s why Father held his silence for so long.
To me, big sis, big brother, to small sis.
"Dad is really amazing."
It suddenly dawned on me.
Father never did interrupt me.
He only asked for one thing.
"Make sure to say proper goodbyes to everyone.”
Today, I’ll make sure to do that.
□
I got down to the first floor.
First to fill my stomach.
Perhaps now with a clear mind, I felt particularly hungry this morning.
When I was attending Magic University, I used to have a large appetite, but I haven’t had much of one lately.
Don't eat in the morning, eat a little before noon, and eat a little before the evening. Such was life.
But today I wanted to eat my fill, first thing in the morning.
I feel good today.
It won’t hurt to help White Mama and grandma with breakfast once a while.
"...Oh."
When I entered the dining room, I was met with three pairs of eyes.
White Mama, Blue Mama, and Red Mama too.
All three were in the dining room and turned toward me, all at once.
"Morning."
"Good morning. You’re early today."
"Good morning."
Each greeting their own way.
Looking back, it's been a long time since I saw the three mothers together.
Do they always eat breakfast together? I don't know either, since I haven't had breakfast for so long.
I took my seat.
Usually, if they were all together, I would run away, but today there was no reason to escape.
"Sieg. You came back with Rudy yesterday, went drinking together?"
"Yup."
"Rudy was especially merry yesterday, something good happened?"
White Mama asked, taking the initiative.
Maybe she already heard from Father last night.
"I told my dad about my worries this past year."
"No wonder Rudy’s so happy.”
Said Blue Mama.
“Rudy was always so worried about Sieg.”
"Really?"
“Yeah, occasionally during breakfast, he would look up the ceiling and say, ‘Sieg’s not coming down today either?’”
"Oh…"
"I think he’ll sleep for a while longer today. It's been a while since he drank that much."
Because I always avoided Father...
Maybe I did something terrible to Father.
"So, what were you talking about?"
Red Mama asked.
Too impatient, she wanted to know what I talked to my father about and what conclusion we came to.
"Um... starting with the conclusion?”
"I prefer that."
"I would like to help a friend in the Kingdom of the Dragon King. It might take a decade or two, maybe even more. I might never return here again."
I’m going to help Pax and witness his future.
But Pax's ambitions are enormous.
He wants a territory of his own, to become independent, to create a new nation.
Not a job for a couple years.
A decade, two decades...
Or maybe when he and I are both dead, a legacy for the next generation to fulfill.
"Is that so..."
The Mothers looked saddened.
Particularly White Mama, her lips bitten red, her eyes a dam near bursting.
In comparison, Red Mama remains her usual-self.
"Is that friend the one you must protect?"
"Yes."
"Now that you made up your mind. Do you best!”
Red Mama said with a smile.
The first time I saw her smile in a long time.
These days, I only saw her frowns.
Of course. Because I fell stagnant.
Red Mama always taught us siblings to "protect someone important."
My conclusion was exactly as she taught me.
"So you decided you won’t marry Sariel?"
Blue Mama asked.
I responded.
"Yeah. I'd like to remain friends with Sariel. Sorry for wasting all the marriage prospects that Blue Mama sought for me.”
"No, it's fine. As I always said, you live as you like. If you found your own path, follow it."
Blue Mama said with a smile.
Her lessons were, “Live as your heart desires. If you have a problem, just ask for help.”
That teaching I haven’t followed lately, until my talk with Father.
Indeed, living our own path is the way to a happy life.
“The house will get quiet with Sieg leaving.”
White Mama was near tears.
My birth mother.
Big sis that married off to the Holy Land of Millis, we’re both her children.
If I leave, both of us will be gone.
Even as an unemployed mouth to feed, White Mama always made breakfast for me.
When not on holiday, she always cooked and prepared breakfast.
Even when I came home late from playing ally of justice, she would sometimes get out of bed to welcome me home.
"Mama, he was my first real friend at Asura Kingdom. That's why I want to go give him a hand."
"Yeah, I know. If friends are in a pinch, you must go."
White Mama wiped away her tears and smiled.
Ever since when we’re young, she had always earnestly exhorted us to “make friends and don’t bully the weak.”
I admired the ally of justice because of my father, Cheddarman.
But it may be because of her that I thought Cheddarman was so cool.
"So I’ll be going now."
Looking over them three, I said again.
"Thank you for supporting me thus far."
Hearing those words, White Mama could hold back no longer, a flood of tears.
Originally Red Mama and White Mama both looked self-satisfied. But when they saw White Mama in that state, they tried to console her haphazardly.
“Don’t cry?”
“Sieg’s leaving, so see him off with a smile.”
Still in tears, White Mama said to them.
"I'm just glad that Sieg is finally moving forward.”
Feeling ashamed, I waited for my mother to stop crying.
□
Afterwards, the Mothers went to make breakfast, hand in hands.
Even Red Mam, who seldom cooks, went in the kitchen.
During breakfast, I told my grandmas that I’d be going abroad.
Both grandmas stroked my head gently, after hearing my decision.
Father, still with his head full of bed hair, smirked when he saw that.
There were two missing from the breakfast table.
Lara, my older sister, and Lily, my younger sister.
They seem to sleep at work rather often.
I'll have to talk to them as well.
So, after finishing breakfast, I decided to go to Magic University.
My last time visiting the Magic University.
The campus where I studied for many years, one I visited regularly even after graduating.
A place where there are bitter memories, but fond memories as well.
"Ah!"
While walking down a hallway on campus, I met a girl I recognized.
The girl that married the fat nobleman.
"Hey!"
"Oh, hey, Sieg-kun."
She was not crying underneath the stairs like before.
On the contrary, she was smiling, surrounded by friends.
She seemed to be fine.
"How are you doing?"
"Ah? Yes, I'm doing well."
“But you were crying so terribly not too long ago?”
"Oh... about that... When I actually got married, it was a little different than I thought."
"Oh?"
"Sure, he’s a bit older and not much to look at, but surprisingly a pleasant guy after we talked a bit.”
"Is that so?"
"He’s a bit of a pervert, but I appreciate that he’s always working to keep me entertained. He is also giving me a lot of leeway, like allowing me to continue attending school. The situation at home turned out better than I expected as well. There are many other wives in a similar situation to me. With everyone so gracious and considerate, I’ll have to do my best as well…”
Ah, so it’s like that.
A noble’s sensibility, throwing money around to help acquaintances without self-regard.
Father and Sensei both rated him highly.
Only deducting points for his lower half.
Not someone I should be beating up.
“Shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.”
"Yeah..."
Before I go with Pax, I owe him an apology.
I thought.
□
I arrived at Lara's research lab.
One knock.
"Come in~"
A familiar voice from inside.
However, not Lara's voice.
"Oh, big brother!"
Lily was in the room too.
Playing with a magic tool as usual.
Before her, lounging in her favorite chair, Lara was studying magic circles on a piece of paper.
"Rare for Lily to be here. What the occasion?"
"I have been here since yesterday! Hey, check this out!"
What Lily showed off was something I didn’t recognize.
It had a rough round shape, but with a few corners here or there.
Not quite a ball, if it hit you, it’d be painful.
Based on the magic circle drawn on various places, it’s probably a magic tool.
"I don’t know what it is.”
"That's right! I don’t know what it’s used for either! Isn’t it cool?”
"Oh... huh?"
"Big Sis Lara found it in the market and didn't know either, so I've been studying it all this time!”
Lily sure is eager.
I don’t get it.
Anyways, does that mean she's been staring at this ridiculous thing since yesterday?
"Lily, did you skip out on work again?"
"No, this is part of the job!"
She insisted.
Why wasn’t she fired yet? Nepotism? Because she’s a Greyrat? Or does she actually produce results?
Whatever.
"Sieg."
Lara, who looked a bit haggard, looked up at me.
"Why are you here?"
Her usual tone.
I would always say to kill time.
"Saying my goodbyes."
Lily looked surprised, but Lara kept her usual sleepy expression.
"Ah, how simple."
"Huh? Oh, yeah."
Somehow big sis was rather cold.
No, that’s just her usual self.
As usual, she’s ambivalent with whatever happens with me.
I felt a little hurt.
“Well, I decided to go to my friend at the Kingdom of the Dragon King, so I might never return.”
I put it succulently.
Then, Lily switched from shock to anger.
Not quite what I expect.
Well, I just made up my mind yesterday, and already am telling my goodbyes today, so it’s understandable.
"What happened to become my assistant?"
"Huh? I never agreed to that.”
“But Big brother Sieg is strong, can ride a horse, and knows how to pamper me. You’re the best person to be my assistant!”
"Thank you the high evaluation."
"I told the Chief that I would hire a newcomer next year. What should I do?"
I do not know either.
"No luck this time."
"Well, what should I say to the Chief?"
"I guess tell him that the person ran away?”
At least I never consented to this.
“I thought for sure you’d be short on money eventually and come begging to be my assistant... tsk~”
Lily started playing with her magic tool again, pouting.
Even though I said we might not meet again, that’s her reaction!
Well, that’s Lily for you, I suppose.
I turned toward Lara.
Her usual self.
With her chin atop Leo’s back, looking drowsy. With a “Huff ╭(╯╰)╮” she looked back.
"Big Sis Lara doesn’t look too surprised.”
"I thought it would happen sooner or later.”
Did you see it with your fortune-telling?
I wish you could have told me if you did...
But if she did, would I have followed her instruction?
Probably not.
After all, before my talk with Father, I never made up my mind.
"So why the sudden change of heart?”
“Let me explain...”
I explained the sequence of events, how one thing led to another.
What happened, Pax’s background.
Why I was under a cloud.
And how after talking to Father, it all cleared up for me.
What my heart desires.
Lara and Lily listened quietly without interrupting me.
"I feel glad that I talked with Dad."
“Until Lucy got married, she always misunderstood Dad as well, because dad was always so lenient on us.”
"Ah... yes."
Father was always lenient with us.
Too lenient.
I didn't realize it until now.
Indeed, bigger sis finally had a heart-to-heart with Father only after getting married.
Maybe because it was only then, like I am now, she realized Father’s feelings.
“So you’re not doing that anymore?”
"That?"
Big Sis asked abruptly, causing me to raise my head.
"Cheddarman!"
"Oh…"
Oh right, Lara knew what I was doing.
"I won't do it anymore"
"Not anymore?"
"It was like... just a way to vent and pass time."
Cheddarman. Moon Knight. An Ally of Justice.
It’s not like I don’t know what I was doing. Reflecting on it now, in a way, I was searching for my true self.
I couldn’t do what I really wanted to do, so I did what I didn’t want to instead.
Then tricking myself into thinking that it was what I wanted all along.
"What's the story?"
Lily tilted her head and asked.
"Sieg, behind the scenes, was playing ally of justice! Beating up bad guys and feeling all proud about himself.”
"Oh, so that’s why you always came back late at night."
"Ally of Justice. He called himself Moon Knight… Pretty lame, right?”
"Oh yeah! The Chief once said to avoid resisting if Moon Knight shows up. Nothing more valuable than your life, he said.”
I'm not a robber.
I have never asked for money, obviously.
I just started punching without asking questions instead.
Still, Uncle Zanoba doesn’t look like a bad person, but maybe he has a dark secret somewhere?
"So that’s it. Brother was doing that behind my back.”
"Yeah..."
“Brother always said you wanted to be an ally of justice since when we were kids, and I did get a lot of help over the years. I get it.”
She understood.
Indeed, I helped Lily out often.
As a natural airhead, she’s an easy target for the bad guys.
"Sieg."
Lara was looking at me while holding her chin.
“No more helping others, so you’re choosing to be a bad guy instead?”
"No, I don't think I'll stop helping people, but I won't hide anymore. I'll proudly help those who want help."
"I see."
Lara studied my face.
And said.
"Sieg is surprisingly clever today."
A rare smile appeared.
Somehow, it’s been ages since I saw Lara’s smile.
"So that’s why, I will be leaving soon."
Lara didn’t call me stupid today.
That alone makes coming by today worthwhile.
At last, Big Sis finally acknowledged me for myself?
"Big Si Lara. Thank you for letting me use this room until now, and thanks Lily for always worrying about me.”
"I wasn’t that worried… But I’ll miss my big brother. I don’t get to leave late anymore.”
"No, you shouldn’t be late even if I’m here.”
I'm not your horse.
Certainly, I did give you rides often.
I smiled wryly at Lily’s words, then it was Lara’s turn.
"Sieg. Even after going far away, and after many years, we’ll always be brothers and sisters. Remember that."
Even if we say our goodbyes, it's only distance that separates us.
Our relationship would never change.
Maybe after half a century, big brother Ars and little sis Chris may no longer be with us.
But Lara, Lily, bigger sister Lucy, and I all shared mothers with longer-lives.
Or perhaps Pax will achieve his goals in mere decades, while everyone's still alive.
If not, with the twists of fate who knows what might happen.
Because I became like this. Something might happen among us siblings as well.
As long as we help each other when one gets in trouble.
Like when Lara helped me... no, she didn't help much, but she did understand me.
"Yeah, I know."
"Okay."
When I answered, Lara nodded with satisfaction.
□
Then I visited people in the market district.
The old man at the fruit stand, the old man at the liquor store.
And many other acquaintances as well.
When I told them I’m leaving town, they all said their regret.
However, no one asked me to stay.
If I’m in a pessimistic mood, maybe I’m surprisingly not well liked…
“We also, when we saw how Sieg just hung out all day, felt it wasn’t ideal. But you finally found your calling, so we feel at ease as well.”
But hearing that, the opposite seems to be the case.
"Thank you for taking care of us."
I was thanked by even those I didn't recognize.
Father said, even if I was playing-pretend I still saved people. They must be among them.
If so, I might feel a little lonely to leave this town.
"Oh!"
"Ah!"
A man stood out among the crowd.
A man who works the market by day and drinks and sells information at the bar by night.
Yes, it was Georges.
"Hey, Georges"
“Ah, son of Greyrat House, thanks for your patronage, but please don’t call me Georges.”
"Please don't say that. Weren’t we friends? Haven’t we hung out everyday?”
“No no, for you to consider someone like me a friend, I’m really grateful, but…”
Georges looked away.
He probably thought he would never see me again.
I put my arm around his shoulder.
"It's because of you, I could move forward. Thank you."
Then, after taking a serious look at me, George laughed.
"...I see. That’s good. But now that my work’s done, my prospects look terrible. How are you gonna pay me back?”
"My sister is looking for an assistant. She might hire you if I recommended you.”
"Really?"
"And if you sell information gained as her assistant to my dad, you might do rather well for yourself?”
"Hey, not a bad idea!"
Georges laughed, wrapping his arm around my shoulder as well.
"I've had a lot of fun this past year."
He said and laughed.
□
Finally, I visited Sensei.
Sensei sat with his back towards the entrance, just as he did the other day.
However, he doesn't seem to be training.
“That face… looks like you still can’t go up against Dark Shadow?”
Sensei said, his back facing me.
Of course, without turning his head either.
If you're going to recite that line, at least turn around first!
And Father is Moon Shadow, not Dark Shadow.
“So... you still find the sword necessary, didn’t you?”
Teacher lifted something.
My sword.
Sensei held my beloved sword in his hand.
It should have been left in my room...
Did you bring it yesterday too?
"Yes, now is time for you to wield this sword! For justice, for defeating the greater evil!"
The teacher turned around with great vigor.
Shouting cheerfully while making various poses.
“I shall pass down to you, the final mystery of North God Style! And the title of the Emperor! So get ready...!"
"..."
Silence followed.
Apparently, the narrative created by Sensei and Father diverged slightly.
Father wanted to talk to me, but Sensei thought differently.
He really wanted to drag me onto the path of a hero.
Father who wished for me to find my own way; Sensei who wished to direct me towards the righteous path.
I can’t say which is better.
A difference in teachings.
“Ah, that look, you finally figured out something…”
Anyhow, looking at me, who remained silent, Sensei realized.
“Wait, you won…? Against Rude... I mean, great villain Dark Shadow?”
“Huh? No, it’s not like I won but…”
“Wow, beating him with bare hands… That guy really goes easy on his son… throwing the match like that… mumble mumble...”
After mumbling to himself for some time, he suddenly clapped his hands.
Perhaps some bad idea came to mind.
“Sieg-kun, you have successfully defeated Dark Shadow, but he’s merely the tip of that evil iceberg. Now, go and seek Lightning. That’s right, if you don’t defeat Lightning, evil cannot be defeated!”
it was useless after all.
"He’s at--"
"Sensei, I won't be going."
In a stronger tone than usual, I interrupted Sensei.
That confused Sensei.
"…Why?"
"Because there is another place I must go."
"Where is it?"
The tone of the teacher was surprisingly gentle, unlike earlier.
"To my friend."
"...Is your friend in a pinch?"
"I don't know. But once upon a time, he asked for my help. I remembered, and now I must go.”
I only said that much.
It’s getting a bit tedious, giving the same explanation over and over again, and all the details would probably go over Sensei’s head anyways.
"I see... will you need the sword there?"
But Sensei seemed to get that much.
As expected of Sensei.
"I’ll need it. If you can return it to me, I’d appreciate it.”
"Alright."
Senei said, sheathing the sword and passing it to me.
A heavy blade.
My beloved sword, custom-made by world-famous blacksmith Ore God for Father, perfect for my superb strength,
The blade is jet black, like obsidian, and blends into the darkness at night.
Only a reflection of moonlight as proof of its existence, for which Dragon God Orsted granted the title “Moon Glitter.”
Moon Blade.
"Sieg."
"Yes."
"I'm not very good with words, and I’m not very smart.”
"I agree."
"So let's practice till the end."
"Can you teach me a special move?"
"No, there's no such thing. Just our usual training."
"Yes."
I wore the sheath on my belt, then unsheathed the blade.
At that moment, the lesson began.
North God style training, no starting sound required.
Sparring after a long absence.
I tried my best to hit Sensei.
And, as a matter of course, I lost.
At the end of the day, I was taken by Sensei to a place.
Owned by a friend of Sensei.
The person was very rich, fat, and a noble.
When I apologized for the other day, he forgave me with a smile.
Even though he looked like a villain and rather crude, he welcomed me with warmth and politeness.
Just like Father, Sensei, and his newly wed wife said, aside from being a slave to his desires he’s not a bad guy.
I didn’t heed Sensei’s third lesson, "Do not judge justice or evil by their appearance."
"You will surely become a hero."
On the way home, Sensei said.
Abruptly.
Sensei and I had various discussions about heroes and allies of justice over the years.
There was always a gap in the conversation.
Sensei who aimed to be a hero, and I who aimed to be an ally of justice.
They seem similar, yet they’re apart.
It is natural that there would be a gap.
"I don't think so."
"What do you think a hero needs?"
When I heard this phrase before, I replied, "The ally of justice never regrets his choices."
In response, the teacher said, "Heroes are the ones who chooses after suffering their choices."
"From the distress of making that choice?"
"Yes, I wanted to be a hero, but it wasn’t possible. No matter how much I stressed over it.”
I was the opposite.
An ally of justice, yet still suffered.
Suffering, distressed, unable to make a choice.
Yet in the end I did choose.
Indeed, from an objective point of view, it is certainly a hero-like behavior.
"You can be a hero. Not an ally of justice, but a hero."
Sensei cannot be a hero, and I cannot be an ally of justice.
Instead, Sensei is more like a friend of justice.
"My disciple."
"Sir!"
"Can you inherit your master's will?"
"..."
I shook my head quietly.
"Senei will still live for a long time, so I will not inherit it now. Sensei, please continue to strive as well."
"...That's true. I'll do it!"
Sensei stated, without showing any signs of distress.
□
The next day, I made preparations for leave.
Goodbyes were made yesterday, so I had no lingering regrets.
Finally, after waving off my Mothers, I left.
Each mother left me with their own advice.
Father, having left early that morning, was no longer here.
I was hoping for a few last words, but it can't be helped.
So I walked through town.
My mother said I could ride a horse halfway, but I wanted the walk.
The market where adventurers and day-merchants hang out.
The shopping district where mid-scale merchants do their business, flowers in full bloom.
The smoke-filled manufacturing district, with an unceasing sound of blacksmithing clanging.
And the Magic University with its enormous campus.
These were the scenery of my everyday life. Witnessing them one last time, I was deeply moved.
Then I arrived at the gate.
The walls of the Magic City Sharia, my home.
The gate was wide open.
Beyond the gate, by the side of the road, a man sat.
A middle-aged magician wearing a gray robe.
Father.
When he found me, he stood up, dusted off the hem of his robe, and came over.
"Hey, Sieg"
"Dad, what are you doing here?”
"I'm seeing you off."
"Couldn’t you see me off at home like mama?”
"I thought it’s better here."
I think it would be good anywhere...
But is that so?
He probably figured I would leave from the front gate.
So he waited for me here.
"Thank you. I wanted Dad to see me off."
"Why, of course! because my son is going on a long journey.”
He said, lifted a bag by his side and turned to me.
I received it. It was about the size of a human head and rather heavy.
I had a bad feeling.
But first, let's check the contents.
"Dad, this..."
It was a black helmet.
A full-face helmet with a crescent emblem on the forehead.
Ally of Justice, Moon Knight Helmet.
"Take it with you."
"Why…?"
"You have been doing something different from what you wanted in the past year, but not everything was wasted."
What was wasted?
Certainly, there was a sense that this year had been a waste.
If I had talked to my father earlier, it would not have happened.
"If you have any trouble in the future, look at the helmet and remember. You might find an answer hidden in that ‘wasted’ time.”
He said and looked behind me.
I looked back as well.
Beyond the gates of Magic City Sharia.
Beyond that gate, the streets where I spent my decades.
When I came back from Royal Aura Academy, the cityscape had changed a lot.
But many things that remained the same.
Small sis and big sis unchanged, and my mothers unchanged.
Sensei as well.
How I viewed my father had changed a lot.
But that was my own misunderstanding.
If time so wasted helped resolve that misunderstanding, then it probably wasn’t a waste.
"I see. I'll bring it with me."
“Oh, also, you could use it there too. It’s pretty sturdy, after all.”
“Ahahah, then I might. Maybe if I find a person on the side of justice, I’ll lend it to him.”
"In that case, I'll send you four more."
Father laughed.
Humored by the idea of a Moonlight Squadron.
I didn’t think it was very funny, but it must have tickled him in some way.
I laughed as well.
After sharing a laugh, I said.
"I'll go now."
"Yes, do your best."
My father pat me on the back, as if pushing me forward, to my leave.
Leaving my hometown, toward my friend--
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