My Beloved Oppressor

Without thinking further, Heiner took two steps back and slammed the door in with his shoulder. Boom! The sound was deafening.

He hit the door again and again, like someone who felt no pain. Bang! Bang! The roar rang through the entire hallway. Immediately, with a jerk, the door tilted into the room.

Between the collapsing door and the doorframe, a thin figure was faintly visible.

For a moment, time passed very slowly.

His dilated pupils reflected the scene in the room. A red cord hanging from the ceiling, a bloodless, pale face, a body struggling in the air, two shaking legs………….

Somewhere in his head a string snapped. Heiner’s feet kicked the ground. He jumped over the door that had fallen to the floor and pulled a knife from his inside pocket.

The blade cut through the air. The red cord snapped and the body, suspended in midair, crashed downwards.

Heiner rolled on the floor as he received her. The knife that had fallen along with them clattered and rolled several times on the floor.

The two tangled bodies stopped. The woman in his arms was as cold as a corpse. A choking cough echoed from below.

Heiner looked down at Annette with a completely soulless face. His hands holding her were trembling.

Ha.

Haa.

Haaa.

His rough breathing filled his ears. His brain buzzed as if his head had been hit with a blunt instrument. Annette’s coughing gradually subsided.

Heiner got up from the floor and grabbed her by the shoulders. Annette’s blue eyes filled with tears. Heiner’s face contorted.

“This….” (H)

His lips quivered.

“What the hell is this…” (H)

The hand on her shoulder tightened. Heiner shouted in a cracked voice.

“What the hell are you doing…………!”

Tears spilled down Annette’s pale cheeks. They dripped down the tip of her chin in torrents.

Strength drained from Heiner’s hands. One corner of his chest tightened painfully. He gritted his teeth and spat out.

“What on earth… is this… what the hell are you…!”

Annette didn’t reply, only her tears dripping. Sitting helplessly on the floor, she looked like a lost child.

Heiner exhaled roughly for a moment and half-consciously embraced her. Her thin body leaned against him without resistance.

He could feel her faint breathing on his shoulder. Reason had long since fled. He struggled to swallow the nauseous rush of emotion, trying to clear his brain.

“Annette.”

“….”

“Annette, please….. How in the world am I…”

He didn’t know what to do.

Heiner didn’t even know what to say. Stop it. What should I do? What can I do? Please, Annette. Please don’t do this.

“I …….” (A)

A thin voice flowed between breathless sobs.

“I don’t want to live anymore………..” (A)

Heiner’s body froze like a stone statue at the small whisper. He stared straight ahead, unable to breathe. His vision dizzily shook.

Suddenly something red and thin came into view. It was the string that Annette had used to bind and store her documents and knitting tools.

She had chosen it to strangle herself.

Suddenly, Heiner realized.

She could make her own life and death decisions at any time. And she could leave him forever whenever she wanted.

It really ……was simple from the start.

It was so simple in so many levels that he cursed himself for not realizing it before.

‘Then… what on earth am I supposed to do………..?’

They were legally bound in the name of marriage. And Heiner could use the power he had to lock her up in the residence or a mental hospital for as long as he wanted.

There were many excuses for this unethical practice. Joining the monarchy’s restoration forces, trying to flee to France with secrets, or because his wife was sick, or went mad.

Speaking of which – no one in the world would blame him. Confinement under perfect surveillance may even prevent death.

She would only think about death, but if she could still live, if he could hold on to her body.

They would be together in brokenness—.

‘Crazy.’

The breath he had been holding in erupted. Heiner closed his eyes with a bitter smile. It was him, not her, who should be locked up in an asylum. His rough breathing slowly subsided.

He opened his eyes again.

“Annette.”

Heiner quietly called her name.

“What should I do?”

“…”

“…would you like a divorce?”

“….”

“Is that what I should do? That’s what you wanted. So much ……… you wanted to leave me.”

“….”

“If you want to go to France, go. If you want to follow Ansgar Stetter, do so. I’ll give you what you want……..”

Annette was held silently to his chest like a broken doll. Heiner embraced her as if he would never let her go again, and spoke in a defeated tone.

“No more, please………….” (H) (*no more trying to die)

The daughter of Rosenberg, the bloodline of a marquis, the daughter of a military general, the object of a long hatred — nothing mattered now.

“If we divorce, say you’ll live.” 

“…”

 “You also want to leave me as soon as possible. So hurry.”

“….”

“Please answer me, Annette…”

Heiner spoke in a desperate tone, like someone who had no self-respect. Nothing really mattered anymore. Annette, who had been still and breathless, nodded slowly.

***

After Heiner’s decision, the divorce proceeded rapidly. Annette was able to get the divorce papers the next morning.

She just sat still and all was well.

The lawyer explained to her the reasons for the divorce and the division of property. But everything fell on deaf ears.

“…… and………….. For various reasons, intangible assets such as buildings and securities are difficult to divide. ………… cash and …… would be provided.”

During her meeting with the attorney, Annette often looked out the window. It was the divorce she had desperately wanted as Heiner said, but there was no excitement about it.

Come to think of it, she didn’t know why she wanted a divorce so badly at the time. It would be the same life if she was divorced and moved out anyway. It would be a life no better than death.

“Here are the bank documents. The alimony will be paid here within a day or two. If you have any concerns, please contact us here—just sign here and the divorce process will be complete.”

Annette took the pen as the lawyer said. Above where the lawyer had pointed out was Heiner’s signature. She looked at it for a moment and then signed in one corner of the document. The lawyer spoke as if he just remembered when he retrieved the papers.

“Oh, and your ex-husband said you could stay here if you wanted to stay longer.”

“….”

“He said he would give you a separate building in the official residence…. would you like to stay a little longer?”

“No, I’m fine.”

“Oh, I understand. Now, if you need help finding a house? I know a few good properties. I can introduce you to a broker.”

Annette shook her head expressionlessly without even showing a polite smile.

“It’s okay. I’ll leave immediately.”

“…… Ah, yes. I understand.”

Annette stood up with the divorce papers in her hand. When she returned to her room, she found the caregiver and the servants fidgeting awkwardly.

“Well, Madam, no, Lady Rosenberg…Are you by any chance planning to stay here a little longer?”

“No.”

“Then shall we pack your bags right away? Is there anything you would like to bring with you?”

“I will do it myself.”

“Ah, yes. If you need more bags, please let me know. And if you need a carriage when you leave, I will prepare it.”

Annette stared at the smiling faces. Everyone was being overly nice. Had they been given an order from above?

“…Yes, thank you very much. I’ll get my luggage ready, so could you please leave?”

The servants looked at each other for a moment, then bowed their heads and left the room.

Annette sat for a while in a daze before starting to gather her belongings. However, she just threw what she had in her hands into her bag at random.

It didn’t matter what she brought. In fact, it didn’t matter if she didn’t bring anything.

Annette, who had packed her bag carelessly, rose from her seat. The property division and bank documents given to her by her lawyer were still on the bed.

Annette left the room with only one suitcase. The servants glanced at her and greeted her. She received their greetings with a glance and walked down the hallway.

Heiner stood like a shadow at the entrance to the first floor. Annette paused for a moment and looked at him quietly. He said as he approached.

“I guess you won’t be staying here anymore.” (H)

“…”

“Do as you please. …  Just keep your promise.” (*promise to stay alive) (H)

Heiner stood in front of her and put a glove on her hand. Annette silently watched his actions.

Heiner placed something in her hand and made her clench into a fist. In her hand, which she opened again, there was a purple brooch and a business card.

It was Ansgar Stetter’s business card that Heiner had taken a while ago.

Annette raised her head again and met his gaze. Heiner took a step back.

“Have a warm holiday season, Annette Rosenberg.”

His deep voice lingered in her ear for a strangely long time. Annette fiddled with the brooch in her hand. Then she parted her lips.

“You too.”