My Little Secret

I picked out my favorite skirt and top. I cleared my mind and decided to give Victor a clean slate. It would be a clean slate if he had actually done something, I put the dress on and curled my hair. I had cut it after the incident and it had grown significantly over time. I wondered if Adam would have liked my short hair. He was always so encouraging, it made me feel secure. Without Adam, I had to reassure myself of everything. Most times it did not work, but I was getting used to it. Things people say about time healing us, it does heal, but mostly because we get used to it.

Poirot was sitting on the bed and there was music playing in the background. My favorite song was playing and I was skipping around the room dancing to it. Poirot wagged his tail whenever I got close to him. One could say I was a good dancer. I moved around as I put my make up on. Humming my favorite song, I put lipstick on. It was the only makeup item I knew how to put on. I put my heels on and get out of my apartment. Victor was downstairs.

"You look, wow" he says as I walk towards him. "Damn Malitz, I'm a lucky guy" he says as he takes my hand and kisses it.

I close my eyes, bracing myself for what was about to happen. I see similar visions like I did before.

Victor with his mom, dad, the girl he used to like, his vision with me, his friends. The sensation wasn't as bad as it was before. Maybe I was accustomed to the pain. It felt different this time, it felt like I was imagining a distant memory that was at the back of my head. I open my eyes and smile at him. I wasn't going to be afraid of the power. I would ignore it like a manufacture defect. I started detesting my brain for doing this to me. The extent it went to protect me. Or was it just a misuse of my imagination.

I brush the thoughts aside and get onto the bike with him. I place my hand on his shoulder and I did not see the vision this time. Maybe I had seen the vision too many times already, or maybe it would happen again after a while. It didn't matter anymore; I wasn't going to be afraid.

He took me out for dinner at a beautiful restaurant and takes me to have ice-cream after that. Victor was a gentleman throughout. He opened doors for me, made sure he knew what my favorite food was, kept his phone away and made eye contact whenever I spoke, he knew what my favorite place to have ice-cream was as well. I was impressed with his efforts. He did everything right, yet, it didn't feel right. I felt like I was holding myself back somehow. I crushed that thought and focused on what he was saying.

"I really like you Malitz." he smiled, "You're funny, smart and not to forget, extremely cute" he said and pinched my nose. "I love your nose" he said and pinched it again. I laughed and looked at him taking a bite of my ice-cream.

"Would you drop me off at Whitney Street?" I ask him. I wanted to spend a while there, with my thoughts, before I went home.

"Sure!" he smiles, "So when am I seeing you again?" he asks.

'So, there was going to be a second date? Hmm. Seemed like this one went well.' I thought to myself and smiled.

He dropped me off a lane before Whitney street. I wanted to take a walk, think about things.

I walk slowly, I take my heels off and walk barefoot. The heels were killing me. I check my phone. 8 15 pm. The date ending early, wasn't a good sign. Victor had already texted me asking me to text him when I got home. I hold my shoes in my hand and walk towards Absolem. The weather was slightly breezy and it felt nice to feel the wind against my face. Is this what it felt like, to let go? I did not want to let go of Adam just yet. But he would have wanted me to.

"You are one of the strongest people I know", he told me once.

"Sofia Malitz, what are the odds" I hear someone shout my name.

"Ivan! What are you doing here?" I ask. It was nice to see him.

"Just out for a ride, my date ended early." He said sounding sad.

"Mine too" I say.

"Wanna do something fun? I was going to the arcade actually for some old school gaming." He said gleefully.

"Aren't people going to recognize you there? You are known for producing sci-fi films that are made into movies" I say.

"Ah! I see someone's done their homework" he laughs.

"Well, I tried" I add, "and sure, I was heading to Absolem and think about stuff, but you know what, I want to give my brain a break tonight, so lego." I tell him and get into his car.

I laugh and say, "Are you ready to lose Mr. Radcliffe? Cause I'm going to whoop your ass in all the games" I add.

"Oh! We shall see." He laughs and starts driving. It felt right and this was exactly what I needed right now.