My Upgrades Are Invincible

After settling down Shinobu I stretched and prepared to see what happens when I jump from one world to another rather going back to Danmachi to then transition to another world.

Actually, should I go back to get my Falna updated? I thought before dismissing the thought as I hadn't completed any daily quests or anything as the demons apparently counted as people unlike the kinds of orcs in LOTR, so I hadn't gotten enough Excellia to justify jumping back there to get the girls hopes up and then just leave again instantly.

"It's like going on a vacation and swinging back home to just pick up a wad of cash to leave again." I muttered as a wall of fog surrounded me as Shinobu watched me about to leave the world as she was curious how my leaving would look.

Before my fog cleared, I could already hear a series of cascading noises as the modern city life sounds brought a nostalgic smile to my face.

Not even twenty minutes later I entered a Pizza Hut in the outskirts of London and as I walked up to the teenager who was gaping at literally fantasy crafted body as my Pure Body skill like I said before had air brushed all the little imperfections off my body leaving me with no visible pores and blond hair that glowed golden in the sun. "I have come for the buffet." I said cheerily and then slammed down a whole one solid gold coin weighing a bit more than an ounce.

The teenage looked between the clearly weird person and the gold coin and just to fuck with the workers who were now likewise gapping at me I started popping my fingers and making lightning arc between them.

"Uhhh Yeah thanks for the gold I guess..." He said quietly pocketing the gold coin instead of putting it in the register and the took out his own wallet to pay for my meal with a couple quid and then he handed me a large cup to get soda out of the fountains.

I gleefully filled my soda and instead of taking a plate to pick up pizza I just literally took the whole peperoni pizza pan off the serving platter and went to go sit down in an empty booth.

"Sniff sniff... I have missed this so much." I groaned as my Pure Body skill helped digest the food within my body by using the tiniest smidgens of mana so at this point, I was just eating the pizza for the taste and after I finished the whole large peperoni pizza I moved onto a platter of garlic bread sticks, then a sausage and ham pizza, then just because I was now being watched by the spell bound restaurant, I ate a whole large Hawaiian pizza.

I calmly walked up to the register as the workers in the back were franticly arguing about whether they should ask me to leave or something. "Excuse me I would like to order thirty pizza's half being peperoni a quarter being just cheese, and the last quarter being ham and mushroom."

I almost busted out laughing hearing one of the kids muttering in the back with my enhanced hearing. "Wait so those people that order such weird food in math problems actually exist..."

The kid who took my order in the first place took a deep breath to steady himself. "I am sorry sir, but this restaurant cannot fill out your order without a forty-eight hours' notice to prepare the ingredient's and such an order would basically be renting the restaurant for the day."

I shook my head in amusement and then moved my hand over the counter leaving an actual full sized gold ingot on the counter weighing more than. four hundred ounces as I looted literal tons of more common metals out of Moria so using it didnt hurt my wallet at all seeing as gold didnt really have much if any value in terms of fusing and didnt have much value in Danmachi except for decoration as Valis was the currency of the world being backed with monster drops.

"Look I want pizza and if you help me get my addiction sated from my time away from any sources. I will make your lives easy as well as give you all some life advice for the future to become millionaires easy." They looked very confused, so I just shook my head. "Ok so maybe my prior actions could be explained away as being a master of sleight of hand but if I do something completely supernatural will you do what I ask?"

One of the guys in the back yelled out. "Do a flip!" I facepalmed in irritation as memes had already seeped in and poisoned the minds of the young.

"Great you have volunteered come here!" I called out and his fellow works pushed the guy who looked to be about twenty in front of me.

I led him outside and all the occupants of the restaurant eagerly followed us out as I grabbed the guy's arm with a firm grip making him hiss in surprise.

Now I wasn't doing this just for the pizza as I had no zero-fucking clue where in the Harry Potter timeline I was as it was 1995 and I was fairly sure it started out at the beginning of the nineties so either he was in his fourth or fifth year and both options would give me great opportunities to interfere in either way so I could loot the entirety of the Room of Requirement which was my main goal besides getting close to Dumbledore to snag the Hallows.

In other words, I was creating a spectacle in order to get the ministry to send oblivators or whatever they were called to wipe the minds of the muggles and allow me to hitch a ride to Hogwarts as I had zero chance in looking for Hogwarts with knowing it was only located somewhere in Scotland.

With a loud whoosh I slowly started flying into the air and made sure that the flames shooting out of my boots didnt burn the person hanging onto my arm for dear life as his eyes bugged out in surprise for a moment before wonder overtook them as he gleefully stared out at the city of London unveiling itself.

Finally, as we got more than four hundred meters and the wind was starting to grow a bit too strong for him, I stopped ascending and went to look at him to get an idea of how he was handling it. "Are you Iron Man!"

Fuck it. Lets see if he can fly for science...

My face was twitching as I dropped the little ass the last few feet onto the grass beside the store and all the people were gaping at me, so I ignored all the other customers as I turned to the teenager who was running the register. "Can you please make my pizza." I said with a twitching face but before I could finalize the details a series of cracks rang out as several people in robes strode up and started shooting lights into the air and I saw the muggles eyes hollowing out as all the intelligence within seemed to dim.

"Alright men start wiping the last half an hour's memories! You kneel on the ground for breaking the Statue of Secrecy. you mud blood!" The heavily overweight Oblivator or Auror ordered me, and I just smiled evilly.

Not even a minute later I had thoroughly disabused the dozen or so idiots of me being a simple muggleborn wizard as my level four agility and dexterity allowed me to literally dance around the bright lances of lights, they called spells that they sent at me, leaving the group on the ground groaning in pain as I beat them senseless with my swords scabbard.

"Die you halfbreed monster!" The fat man screamed out and then with an exaggerated jab a little lance of green light was shot at me...

I blinked and then my sword flashed out cutting the killing curse apart and sending the smallest of space blades which took off the Auror's hand.

"Consider that a warning you fat little whale..." I muttered before another large series of cracks rang out and then I noticed more than a couple dozen of wizards and witches wearing robes advancing upon me. "Oooh someone's a tattletale..." I grinned stretching as the new wizards took in the carnage that had basically totaled the Pizza Hut and more importantly, I was still standing there with no wand with only a sword while all the other people were in some manner hurt though with the magic potions within this world, I knew they would be all healed up within a couple days none the worse.

"Hey, these people called me mean names so I beat them up... Am I going to have to beat you up or can we talk like civilized people." I called out making the trio of more hardened wizards approaching me stagger and I think I recognized Kingsley as despite how racist it sounded but how many black Aurors that looked to be battle hardened could there be in Harry Potter.

I heard something cutting through the air and I whirled around and cut what looked to be a stunning spell out of the air and had to blink in surprise as I recognized the very man, I wanted to see...Albus Dumbledore walked towards me wielding the death stick and with my adventurer tunned senses I could feel deaths touch upon the wand which was similar to when Freya showed off how her death domain felt.

"I was just having tea with my friend Kingsley when we all heard how a whole Obvliator team was taken apart by some stick wielding maniac but now I see you are probably some descendants from the eastern samurai style of using magic to augment your body correct?" He said confidently and I could only shake my head.

"No, I am not what you think but now that you are here, I would like to discuss things with you about the future." I tried to be vague as I didnt want to just come out and say hey I know how to kill Moldyshorts.

"We can talk at length once you have surrendered and face punishment for harming ministry employees doing there jobs." He said calmy

I could only roll my eyes... Like really teleporting in to then mind wipe people and probably giving them a miniature stroke from the violent memory purge. Such a job shouldn't be a thing honestly. "I suppose old Tom Riddle is giving you trouble in that school, right?" I said leadingly and wasn't surprised when he sent a stunner, that was at least three times faster than the other ones the Auro at my chest.

But compared to Gyutaro's demon blood arts sickles flying around it was like watching someone gently toss a Nerf football for me to cut it in half out of the air making it fizzle out of existence.

"Dumbledore I would like help you a bit but if you try to establish some nonsense sense of dominance by trying to defeat me in a duel in order to 'bring my youthful discretions to order' you are going to be very surprised when I have to drag your decrepit ass back to that castle."

I don't think I was being uncharitable to him as the thing he did to show dominance and attempt to bring order to Tom Riddle was to light the poor orphan's wardrobe on fire and with the kid growing up during the blitz and the nightly bombings he had to just hope to god to survive. It isn't a surprise he went psycho trying to get some form of immortality though it was pretty apparent that he was a sociopath, but mental health isn't really much of a thing back in the forty's let alone in the wizarding world.

Dumbledor didnt seem to enjoy me putting on the backfoot but he still took a deep breath and I saw him send the Death Stick into what as probably a wrist holster. "Very well let us talk and afterwards I shall decide whether to turn you over to the ministry or hire you as a teacher..."

What... I have no fucking intentions of being a teacher or some nonsense, "Fine let's go." I said quietly and then I stuck out my arm which Albus took and with a loud snap we instantly teleported outside the front doors of Hogwarts and walked inside.

"We are having lunch right about now so you are welcome to join where we can discuss the details of your employment." Dumbledor said cheerily completely disguising the proud sorcery who about to bend the world to his will as we started off at one another before we teleported

'Give me not even a week and I can kill Riddle snag the deathly hollows clean out the Room of Requirement and then buy all the stuff out of Diagon Alley and fuck off out of this world.' I thought as I could only mentally facepalm seeing the gawking people of Bauxbatons, Drumstrang, and the four houses of Hogwarts staring at me as I walked down the hallway way and sat at the staff table to eat more.

'Oh, hey there's Fleur... Uhhh she looks thirsty...' I thought dryly seeing her eyes literally glowing with light and how little bursts of fire were popping off her hands.