My Wife Is A Secret Assassin
Chapter 81: Are You Crazy?
Samantha had a smile on her face, "I again had no idea about anything but that woman was so gentle and lady-like, I felt secured around her. Her smile was like a ray of sunshine which brightened my sad life. I couldn't say no to her and I agreed to go with them. From then on, I lived with that cop and his wife, within a few months I was officially adopted by them and became a part of their family."
Samantha shared the true story of how she became a part of Bill and Sarah's lives.
Chance realized the cop in this story was 'The Exterminator', he was surprised to know that he was a cop before being an assassin but then a weird thought popped up in his mind.
'What if The Exterminator was an assassin as well as a cop at the same time. Fuck' This possibility drove him crazy but he hid his emotions well and listened to Samantha's story.
"I led an amazing life with them. They were a blessing to me. The cop and his wife treated me like their own child. Eventually in a few months, I accepted them as my parents and my life again became normal or that's what I thought. You know what Chance?"
"Hmm?"
"I was never able to get over my fear of men. My adopted dad was the only man I ever trusted. I had male friends in college but I always maintained a safe distance from them. I did go out on a few dates but when it came to intimacy, that assaulter's face always flashes in my mind."
Chance cursed himself for making a move on her without knowing her past, because of him she remembered the past incident, he didn't like the fact that he triggered a bad memory in her.
"If any of the guys I went on dates with try to kiss me, I move back. I am not comfortable with physical intimacy. I therefore never kissed anyone till date"
Chance was shocked with this revelation as he just realized he was her first kiss.
"I realized after a few dates, that physical intimacy is what every man looks for in a relationship and I know I can never be comfortable with it, so I stopped going on dates and preferred staying single. My adopted parents were concerned about me but I assured them I was fine. They still sent me to a few consultants and I went through many consultancy sessions but I was never able to get over this fear. I still find it uncomfortable to have men around me. Casually it is fine but close intimacy is not"
"I am sorry Samantha" Chance spoke as he was feeling guilty for his actions.
"Don't be. Honestly Chance, you are the first man I ever felt comfortable around. Today what happened between us, I… I don't find it disgusting. I kissed you back and you stopped when I asked you to but Chance…"
Samantha was not sure how to continue and say what she wants to.
"Samantha, it's okay, you don't have to explain yourself and if you are not comfortable talking about it then let it be." He assured her.
"No Chance, if this moment is gone then I won't be able to gather my courage, let me please share what I feel"
"Sorry, please continue"
"Chance, mostly every human being craves for physical intimacy. There is nothing wrong with it, every one has their own desires. I have been asked out by many men and I know they were all attracted to me but I knew I won't be comfortable with them so I rejected those guys."
She took a deep sigh before saying, "You are the first man I ever liked Chance. You were not wrong when you claimed, you felt mutual attraction between us. I like you and I can't deny I feel attracted to you but that is it Chance, I can only feel this attraction but I can't do anything else about it. Today I kissed you but suddenly that assaulter's face was flashed in front of my eyes and I pushed you away. I can never get over it Chance and I can never give you myself willingly. I know all of this is too much to take for you too. So, I request you to please give up on me, I can never give you what you want."
Samantha finally told him what was buried deep in her heart.
Chance was surprised when he heard her words, he had no idea she went through so much in life and her past incident still haunts her.
Chance observed Samantha was fighting her tears, he gently pulled her closer to him and hugged her. He placed her head on his chest and gently stroked her head.
She couldn't control it anymore and tears flowed from her eyes and she cried.
Although she had a good life later where Sarah and Bill ensured no harm reached their daughter; brought her up well but some cruel incidents just stayed with her forever.
After crying for some time, Samantha felt better and she moved away from chance.
"I hope I am very clear Chance" She spoke.
Chance caressed her cheeks, "Hmm you were crystal clear about your stand. I am really glad you like me too" He smiled at her.
Chance's smile always reminded her of Sarah's it was bright and was like a ray of sunshine in her life but she told herself to not get swayed by it.
"Chance, but as I told you, I can never be comfortable having physical relations with you or anyone…"
"Yeah, I know"
Samantha nodded her head, "I hope, now you understand why I have been avoiding you and tried my best to never give you any hopes of having a future with me?"
"Yes, I do. I am really sorry to know what happened in your past but I am also glad this was the reason why you stayed away from me. Although I acted confident, somewhere I was even scared with the thought of you not liking me" Chance honestly shared his feelings.
"Where are you going with this Chance?" Samantha suspiciously questioned him as his words were confusing.
"You are not wrong, I am indeed attracted to you physically, how can anyone not be, you are the most beautiful woman I ever met and you are very pretty but Samantha I don't lust after you, I am genuinely in love with you. I love you so much, that I don't care even if we never have any physical relations…"
Samantha was surprised at what he was saying and she didn't expect him to utter these words, so she interrupted him, "Chance, you are being ridiculous"
"Let me finish"
"No" Samantha stood up from her seat and glared at him, her eyes full of rage.
"Chance, what are you trying to do? Are you planning to say you are fine with having no physical relationship with me?"
"Yes"
"Oh, is that really the case or you are saying this now and in future will again try to be intimate with me?"
Chance was shocked at her accusation, "What nonsense Samantha? I have no such intentions"
Samantha scoffed at him, "Today I kissed you so you must be thinking, 'It's okay, I'll just say I am fine with having no physical relationship with her but in future I'll try to get closer to her. Today she kissed me so tomorrow maybe something more can happen between us' This is what you are thinking, aren't you?" She shouted at him.
"Samantha, are you crazy? When did I say any of it?" Chance was genuinely surprised by her accusation as he indeed didn't have such thoughts.
"You didn't say it but that's what you are thinking"
"Oh, how do you know that? You can read my mind?"
"Yes, I can"
"That's ridiculous because I have no such ideas"
"That is what you will say now, but later this is not what you will do"
"Samantha, you don't even know me that well, is it right at your end to accuse me of something so humiliating?"
"Chance, I can't believe any man can love a woman without expecting any physical intimacy in return from her"
Chance glared at Samantha in anger, for the first time he was furious with her, he felt wronged by her words and was insulted by her accusation, he took a long breath to calm himself down.
He realized by arguing, he won't be able to put any sense into her, so he thought for a while and came up with a solution.
"Samantha, do you really not believe that men can love women wholeheartedly without any expectations from them?"
"Yes, I don't"
"If your mom, the cop's wife, would have been uncomfortable with ever having any physical relationship with your father, then would he have stopped loving her?"
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