Not Knowing The Betrayal Of That Day

Translator and Editor: Effe and Yonnee

────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────Chapter 19

“I should have paid more attention, but it’s all my fault. Forgive me. Do you have any more injuries than that? If there is any discomfort, I will call a doctor right away.”

“Oh, no. It’s okay…”

“You are welcome to tell me. For me now, serving the Madam is the most important task. So you don’t have to think that it’s any trouble. We will see each other often during our stay here anyway.”

“I… I’m really ok. Thank you for your concern…”

“It is a matter of course. Then I will take you to the office.”

Tessa looked at Lange, who had been smiling since before, with a slightly curious look. He was the first man to come to her and smile at her as much as he did.

A lot of people were busy laughing or frowned when they saw her. If not, it was an impure gaze, trying to figure out what to do with her.

Is that why? Lange also had a strong physique, but compared to the others, he was less afraid or withdrawn in front of her. Tessa followed along with Lange silently. Lange had been walking at Tessa’s pace since earlier.

“Ah, when it comes to the Young Lord, there will be no such incident again in the future. It’s going to be hard for him to get out of now. I promise you in my name.”

“Oh, I see…”

Tessa nodded faintly at Lange’s words.

“More than that, you are more beautiful today. You seem to have a much better complexion than when I saw you before. Do you have any discomfort while staying here?”

Whether it was a consideration, or whether it was his original personality, Lange spoke his words to Tessa constantly without hesitation. Of course, it wasn’t too burdensome as it was usually a light conversation, but that’s why Tessa was even more curious about Lange.

He was the first man to talk so much…

“Sir Shine has just returned from a long journey today, so his condition is a little finicky. If he’ll speak a little harsher than before, please pardon him.”

“Ah yes…”

“We have arrived.”

As he walked while answering Lange’s words, who were constantly pouring in, at some point they were on the fourth floor. It was also a place she was used to because she had been there before.

Lange knocked on the door and entered the office. He then beckoned Tessa to come in, and Tessa cautiously stepped into it.

The quiet office was the same as before. If there was one thing that has changed, did it seem a little cleaner? It used to be cluttered, but now things seem to have been put in place. Also, the portrait of Marquis Jutert on the wall had disappeared.

In the office, Hert was talking to another knight. As soon as Lange and Tessa entered, their conversation stopped there. When Hert shook his head, the knight immediately withdrew.

“Then I will leave as well.”

There was no answer from Hert, but Lange bowed his head as if familiar with it and left. On the way, he didn’t forget to greet Tessa as well. Lange immediately followed the knight and went out of the room.

Hert, the only man in the office with Tessa, hesitated as she stood there, bowing her head. At that moment, a nervous voice came from the desk.

“It’s distracting, so sit down, don’t stand.”

“I’m, I’m sorry…”

Tessa hurriedly sat down on any sofa nearby and then glanced at Hert little by little. Even though she came, he had been doing something right after the knight came out and he didn’t raise his head once. As she looked, she saw a quill in the man’s large hand drawing a smooth cursive handwriting.

Suddenly, Tessa was surprised that Hert could read and write. Because the boy Tessa knew was illiterate like her. When did he learn to write? Tessa couldn’t write. Because she had no one to teach her to write, and Tessa never thought she had to learn writing by herself.

She suddenly felt ashamed of herself. She did not intend to learn to write, even though she spent her time in this place where paper and pens, books and libraries were scattered. However, Hert, who fought countless times on the battlefield at the risk of his life, learned to write in the midst of it.

Tessa couldn’t get over the thought that she was a good-for-nothing, just as the Marquis’ heir once said.

‘It’s embarrassing, in the meantime, I…’

What has she been doing? Tessa looked like she was getting fed up with her shallow will and effort. She fell into despair day by day and was only sacrificing food without doing anything, and Hert, who did not give up in the midst of despair and became a perfect noble. He was so different.

Tessa scratched the back of her hand. She was so embarrassed that she couldn’t even raise her head.

Did she want to die like this? She hadn’t even struggled as hard as Hert. Her chest throbbed. She bit her lower lip and looked down at the floor, clenching her hands tightly.

It becomes even more obvious. She wondered what she had done to Hert. It looked like tears were about to fall. Even though she knew she didn’t deserve to cry, tears welled up when she thought that she had messed everything up.

‘Stupid b*tch.’

The manager was right. She was so stupid. As she said, it was Tessa herself, not anyone else who was to blame. Had she made the decision carefully from the start, or if she had been honest with Hert in the middle… this wouldn’t have happened.

If she hadn’t given up and struggled to the very end, it might have been a little different. Just as Hert did not give up and gave a proud victory streak, she herself…

‘I like you.’

At that moment, the past came to mind. He liked her. The appearance of a boy who confessed shyly. Even the promise they made to dream of the future together.

Tessa now knows for sure why her chest throbs whenever she thinks of Hert from before.

‘I think I like you too, Her.’

She liked Hert. She still likes Hert. Even though Hert she knew was not here and she had killed him, Tessa was projecting a boy from the past on him in front of her.

But how could that be? At the same time, Tessa couldn’t stop the sense of shame that was weighing on her.

‘I have no shame. I’m selfish…’

As soon as Tessa realized her heart, she blamed herself. What qualifications did she have to say that she still liked Hert?

She committed an irrevocable sin against him and still loves him. Is this an absurd thing to say? There was no woman in this world who was more selfish and dense than her.

Tessa felt disgusted with herself, who still liked Hert. She couldn’t forgive or understand herself.

‘B*tch who doesn’t know grace.’

The words of the Marquis’ heir who criticized her came to mind. Looking back, there was nothing wrong with his words. Perhaps the Marquis’ heir had been looking through her core for a long time. That a person named Tessa was so ignorant and useless.

…That she doesn’t need anything.

‘How can someone be like this… You should know your place. Even if you like him… What are you going to do?’

Tessa wanted to cry out loud for the first time. She wanted to put everything back. And she wanted to go back. The first time they met. She wanted to go back to that time and didn’t want to see Hert. Hert shouldn’t have met her. Then his life wouldn’t be so twisted.

Tessa couldn’t even crumple the hem of her clothes, so she tore her hands indiscriminately. His hands quickly turned red, and the areas she had scraped with her nails were even swollen. There were also places where blood was oozing out slightly. It was a mess for anyone to see. Just like her.

Then a large hand grabbed her small hand.

“What are you doing?”

Suddenly, Hert was looking down at Tessa with a stiff face. It was such a terrifying expression that it made her cringe. Tessa’s breath was panting without realizing it.

“…He, Her…”

“Is it a hobby to hurt yourself? Or are you protesting against me now? That you’re not satisfied.”

“That’s, that’s not…”

“Then what is it?”

At Hert’s question, Tessa shut her mouth. She couldn’t really answer. How could she say it was because she still liked him so much? As she turned her gaze, Hert let out a smirk.

“Are you going to shut your mouth again? What are you…”

Hert could hardly understand the behavior of the woman in front of him. When the office door opens, she smiles, and after entering this place, she hurts herself with a darkened face. How should he understand this? She doesn’t even answer his question and keeps her mouth shut. She tried to avoid him.

‘Why? Because I’m ignoring you?’

Ignoring Tessa since before was just a simple grudge. It was because she didn’t show a smile in front of him, but he didn’t like the way she smiled softly at his subordinate whom she met only for the second time. Still, he was nervous about having her standing still, so he even ordered her to sit down. It suddenly became quiet, and now she was hurting her innocent hand.

‘If not…’

Was she regretting it now? The choice she made to pay back with her body? She was disgusted by the fact that she continued to sleep with him, so she was tearing her hands apart. After all, she was the wife of the previous Lord and she was a noblewoman. The thought of having to give her body over and over to the knight is terrifying.

Wasn’t she the woman who even sold him as a gladiator slave to become a noble woman?

Hert twisted his lips. He gripped Tessa’s chin with one remaining hand, making her look at him.

“Let me be clear here, your body is no longer yours.”

“Some, something like that…”

“You told me to do whatever I want. You were the one who promised to pay for your sins with your body. Have you already forgotten?”

Hert’s gaze focused on Tessa’s attire for a moment. With her looking fully dressed, he swept her down from the top to the bottom. As if he was going to capture everything with his eyes.

He stared at the woman’s collarbone, which was then followed by the chest that went down. Compared to her slender body, her breasts were quite large.

“Isn’t that the reason? ‘Please devour me’, that’s why you’re wrapped nicely.”

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