Pain Fetish

For the first time the night was exciting.

Fu Ge walked over quickly and opened the door, and the light from the bedroom was instantly projected into the dark corridor, as if tearing a hole in the night.

And Qi Han was standing in the middle of that opening, dispelling all his fears.

“Good evening, sir.”

Fu Ge’s eyes were still filled with the light of the past. He took a deep breath and felt that he should say something as a response to “work harder next time.”

So he clenched his fists and spoke very quietly, “You are very handsome tonight.”

Qi Han laughed and raised his hand to rub his head, “You’re so clever with your words.”

Fu Ge didn’t know what to reply. In fact, he was now full of thoughts on how to make Qi Han stay tonight. Whether the other man still wanted him or not, Fu Ge didn’t want to be alone. The endless nightmares were suffocating him.

He walked over to the sofa and simply knelt down.

“Come here.” Qi Han stopped him, his eyes sweeping over his knees, his chin pointing at the bed, “Sit down.”

Fu Ge nodded and walked over to him stiffly, glancing at the bed and then at the Alpha, moving rigidly to pull the zipper of his trousers, unable to resist asking cautiously when he was halfway through: “Is sir going to… do it with me?”

Qi Han lowered his eyes and said indifferently, “No. Just get it out.”

Fu Ge’s fingers trembled slightly. Then it occurred to him that during the month after their reunion Qi Han had never had sex with him, only infrequently using his mouth, and today was such an infrequent day, but apparently his skills were not satisfactory.

Fu Ge was a little frustrated, his fingers curling.

Beta was bland, so Qi Han couldn’t bring himself to do anything with him.

So Fu Ge worked very hard tonight.

He clenched his fists and took it so deep in his mouth that he could barely breathe, raising his eyes to Qi Han as he struggled.

However, before he could see anything, his hair was suddenly grabbed. “Ugh—” Fu Ge tilted his head in pain. In the next second, a few fingers were thrust into his mouth, working their way into it roughly.

“Put away your tiger teeth.” Qi Han ordered condescendingly, “Otherwise I will break them.”

Fu Ge whimpered and raised his eyes, his chin already slick with spit dripping down these fingers, “Yes… sir.”

In the end it was Qi Han who took the initiative and pressed his head down forcefully until filthy droplets dripped all over the floor and stained his pyjamas.

Fu Ge covered his mouth and stood up, saying in a muffled voice, “Sir, wait for me.”

Then he quickly ran into the bathroom, brushed his teeth and rinsed his mouth, thinking as he cleaned up that he had to move quickly so as not to keep Qi Han waiting. He racked his brains to figure out how to keep Qi Han here, so that he could take the opportunity to ask him what mistake he had made back then that made Qi Han so upset.

However, his body had been numb for so long that it had developed a dull and sluggish muscle memory, and Fu Ge’s “hurried” movements were too uncoordinated.

He looked like a little robot just learning human motions, so clumsy that he hit the door frame three times like a little gyroscope when he walked in and out.

Having managed to bump himself up and down, Fu Ge finally ran out of the bathroom, so cheerful that he could be described as “giddy”.

“Well, sir, I—”

His voice stopped, his smile froze, and he saw that the bed was empty. Qi Han had long since left, and the bed was as flat as if no one had ever come in.

“Gone…”

He sniffled and tilted his head towards the door, his lips twitching unnaturally.

A sharp gust of wind blew violently through the window glass, and his shoulders stiffened in fright as he trotted to Qi Han’s door, almost bursting into tears at the sight of the door that seemed to be waiting for him, yet the next second, Qi Han’s voice leaked out—

“Find a few Omegas who are knowledgeable and sensible. No Beta.”

“What else could be the reason, no pheromones and no estrus, like a piece of wood, boring as hell.”

Fu Ge’s fingers stiffened; he was stunned.

He hung his head and stood for a long time, so long that he seemed to have truly turned into a piece of wood, before he turned around and walked down the stairs.

He didn’t want to experience the hot and humid feeling of cold sweat soaking his clothes again, and the blanket covering his body in an airtight way was really uncomfortable.

So he gave up on sleep and started painting in the living room.

Fearing that the light would be too bright and disturb Qi Han, Fu Ge only turned on a small night light. The dim light didn’t give him any sense of security, so he could only hug the drawing board and shrink himself into a small ball that you wouldn’t even notice without looking closely.

He said he was painting, but in fact he was just scribbling haphazardly. He didn’t know what happened, but it was hard to lift his arm and his brush kept shaking when the tip touched the paper.

Someone walked down the stairs. It was too dark. Fu Ge couldn’t see his face clearly, but he could see the wrist. There were a few loops of a navy blue ribbon wrapped around it, and a silver prayer wheel the size of a knuckle hung from the ribbon.

But he knew it wasn’t Qi Han, because the man’s tone was too naive.

“Why are you still painting, aren’t you afraid of mosquitoes!” He questioned angrily with a bit of childishness in his tone.

Before Fu Ge could react, he saw the man walk over quickly, grab his wrist and beg him, aggrieved, “Gege, stop drawing, you’ve already been bitten, two, three, four mosquito bites on your arm… several bites.”

After saying that, the man muttered: “I haven’t even had a bite yet.”

Fu Ge’s cheeks flushed, and he swept the brush over the man’s forehead automatically, “Be sensible.”

When he said it, he was stunned.

But the man sat down and lay on his lap, rubbing against him like a large, clingy dog, “Am I not sensible enough? You don’t let me call you ‘wife’ in front of outsiders, I’ve been putting up with it for a week, now I have to call you enough times!”

He turned around and held Fu Ge’s waist, looking up at him, “Wife, wife, wife, wife! Don’t look at the painting, look at me!”

Fu Ge was unable to say a word, but instinctively curved his lips in a smile, and his obscure eyes were gradually filled with a tiny light, as if a dull robot was given human consciousness, his whole body becoming a little more animated.

“Why are you so coquettish? Do I spend too little time looking at you every day? Besides, isn’t looking at the painting just looking at you?”

The page was turned at some point, and the latest picture showed a naked young Alpha, perfectly shaped and muscular, every line of his body bursting with power, his pose of turning to look behind his back sunny and sexy.

“What do you say, it was not easy for me to chase you! I served as a model for your club for free for half a year.”

The man looked like he had suffered a big grievance, “My young body was seen by everyone!”

Fu Ge rubbed his head in amusement and coaxed, stroking his hair, “Alright, alright, thank you for your sacrifice, your body is awesome!”

“That’s more like it…” The man grunted, “But you were so hard to chase. I modelled for you guys for a semester for free, and at the end of the semester that bunch of Omegas lined up to ask me for contact information, and you! I strolled through your world naked and you didn’t even remember my name!”

He turned his head in exasperation and buried his face in Fu Ge’s abdomen.

Fu Ge blushed sweetly and lowered his head, kissing the tip of the man’s ear like a cat, his voice soft and doting, “Well, you already know when I fell for you, don’t you? It was not later than you.”

“Oh, then why did you keep ignoring me?”

“Wasn’t it because of the rumour that the school grass (the most popular male student) didn’t like Beta…”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Fu Ge was startled. Not liking Beta… He rolled these words on the tip of his tongue, his heart on the verge of bursting suddenly.

“All right, all right.” The man got up, his cool palm landing on Fu Ge’s head and rubbing it twice, “I’ve heard that painters can’t help but beautify their loved ones with their brushes. Let me see if Gege has painted my capital a little bigger!”

Fu Ge’s face was a little hot, “You… you’re listening to gossip.”

He flipped through the drawing board to find the most perfect picture, only to see that all but the first one were ruined, either cut by the paper cutter or smeared with crappy lines.

The man’s voice sounded next to him, but at this moment it seemed low and cold: “Gege, haven’t you found it yet?”

Fu Ge inexplicably felt a chill down his spine, “Wait a moment, I, I’ll do right away.”

But the man suddenly let out a low cry, “Give it to me!” He reached out and grabbed the drawing board.

When Fu Ge turned his head, he saw the blurred face become hideous in an instant, bleeding from seven orifices and lunging towards him with a bloody mouth open.

“Help!”

He screamed as he tumbled off the sofa and staggered out of the room, and the scene he had seen a hundred times in his nightmares suddenly came into view.

The pitch-black basement, the rough horsewhip, the ropes around his wrists, and the video tape playing on repeat, all appeared in their places in the living room.

The monster behind him was chasing him, “What are you running for, gege?”

“Stay back! Don’t come any closer!” Fu Ge screamed in a broken voice, crawling up the stairs. His ankle was suddenly clutched. He stretched his hands in desperation to grip the steps, but was still dragged down mercilessly.

“Let me go… I beg you, let me go…” He squeezed his eyes shut and slapped the man behind him, struggling desperately, “It has nothing to do with me, I didn’t do it, it wasn’t me… It wasn’t me…”

“Xiao Ge!” A harsh, low voice reached his consciousness.

Fu Ge held his hands up and gasped raggedly for a long time before he turned his head shakily and opened his eyes, “Sir… sir?”

“It’s me.” Qi Han looked at his red eyes, “What’s wrong with you?”

“He’s coming… He’s coming to get me…” Fu Ge stood up and pointed at the centre of the living room, “He won’t let me go—”

Before the words were finished, Fu Ge was stunned.

The living room was brightly lit and empty. The drawing board, the night light, the chains, along with the monster with the bloody mouth all disappeared together. Even the sofa didn’t look like anyone had been sitting on it.

“How… How is it possible…”

Fu Ge shook his head, his eyes already red. He walked to the living room in disbelief and rummaged through the sofa, but could not even find a pillow that had been crushed.

“It can’t be… It can’t be, it was just here…” He muttered to himself like a madman, covering his mouth and spinning in place twice before turning his head to look at the stairway again, “Sir, please listen to me—”

The words were cut off again, and he was dumbfounded for the third time tonight. This time Qi Han, who had just awakened him, disappeared.

For a moment, everything stood still.

Looking straight ahead in bewilderment, Fu Ge put the tip of his finger in his mouth and bit down hard, biting until his mouth was full of blood, before he dared to believe that what had just happened had never happened.

He looked at the stairs and then behind him, suddenly squeezing out an almost imperceptible smile, tears slipping slowly out of his red eyes.

“Fake…”

He saw the blanket that had fallen by the stairs, soaked in cold sweat.

He saw the phone clutched in his hand, the lit screen still showing the chat between him and Qi Han.

It was just that after 16:39, there was a blank space, except for a prompt to withdraw his own message, and no reply was received from the other party.

Qi Han didn’t say that he timed out, didn’t tell him to work harder, didn’t walk into his room, didn’t let him taste a fishy taste, and didn’t wake him up…

From waking up from a nightmare to the present, from one o’clock in the morning to half past, everything that had appeared in front of him was just his “self-directed and self-acted show”.

He danced, he cried and laughed, he painted in the void, and he even flirted with a cloud of air.

He was never rescued…

Whether it was five years ago, or five years later, the light that he thought could tear the night apart was nothing more than his comical, pathetic hallucination.

With his heart breaking, Fu Ge really wished he was a piece of wood.

He blinked helplessly and heard the familiar voice again, “Xiao Ge?”

Qi Han was standing on the top of the stairway looking at him, his eyes red and his pupils wide.

The hallucination is back, Fu Ge thought.

He chose wisely to ignore it this time, dragging himself step by step upstairs, and was caught as he passed by Qi Han. Mr. Hallucination asked him, “Why don’t you lift your feet?”

Fu Ge froze and followed his line of sight to his feet, only to find that his feet had been shuffling on the floor all the way, as if he couldn’t lift them.

He moved, and indeed he couldn’t lift them.

“Too heavy,” Fu Ge said.

Mr. Hallucination asked again, “Why are they heavy?”

Fu Ge cocked his head and thought about it, “I don’t know…”

“You know, think carefully.”

Some images flashed through Fu Ge’s brain, and a sudden fiery pain flooded his body, spreading from his ankles.

“It’s like the feet are… tied with something…”

“What kind of something?”

Fu Ge raised his eyes, “Chains, very thick chains.”

“Can you open them for me, I won’t run again.” His lips that couldn’t stop trembling were dry and cracked, almost white, as if he had begged, saying those words a million times before, “Don’t you like my ankles the most? They’re bleeding from being chained.”

With tears sliding down in trickles. Fu Ge curled his lips, “It hurts too much…”

But from beginning to end, no one responded to him.

The living room was quiet like a warm morgue.

Fu Ge just stared at Mr. Hallucination for half a minute before realising in hindsight how ridiculous his begging was.

He shook off Qi Han’s hand and dragged his unsteady feet, unable to lift them, step by step, like a walking corpse, from the end of the nightmare back to the beginning.

And ten minutes after he returned to his room, Mr. Hallucination, who should have disappeared, suddenly moved.

Qi Han’s face was expressionless as he fumbled for his lighter and walked to the door, Fu Ge’s fearful running and crying in the living room etched in his mind.

There was a click and a spark.

He sat in the dead of night, smoking all night.